Chapter 1030: Meaning Of Life

“So, is this why you support Mr. G so much, not only because he is your fiancé, or to repay him for saving you, but you want to rely on him to change clones’ fate?” Zhang Heng said.

“Yes.” Miss F nodded and confessed. “As you can see, even if I try my best, all I can do is to open a few more nursing homes like this. You’re right, in a way. I can’t change the fate of our entire population, so I need him. Mr. G is one of the few willing to treat clones and ordinary humans equally. He promised me that in the new world he created, there will be no tracking devices, memory encoders, or serial numbers; a world where clones can enjoy the same rights as ordinary people.”

“And you believe him?”

“I believe in everything worthy of trust,” Miss F said. “It’s you. I don’t know what you believe in so far. I was worried about you at one time, especially when you first awakened. I knew what you felt because I experienced a similar thing as well. You know what troubles you will encounter next, but you don’t seem to be a person in trouble at all.”

“My situation is special.”

“Well, that’s what you have been saying. I might have doubted you before, but now I choose to believe you. That is because the ordinary clones can’t complete Mr. G’s test, nor can they defeat the emergency response team. You even got the memory encoder from them. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t want to dig up your past, nor the secrets behind you. I just hope that you can find your direction.”

Zhang Heng listened to Miss F quietly.

“You are the most powerful clone I have ever seen, and unlike me, you completely broke the shackles on your neck, singlehandedly. In other words, you broke the tragic cycle the clones are destined for and gained the freedom we all longed for. At least a part of it. What next? What do you plan to do after you gain your freedom?”

“I plan to focus on collecting shellac records.”

“I’m not talking about your newly developed hobby,” Miss F said. “I’m asking about the ultimate question of your life. What is the meaning of your life, and what goals you’d wish to accomplish in your next phase of life? I’m not talking about the goals programmed into your mind. I’m talking about what you really want to do.”

“Do you want me to help you to liberate other clones?” Zhang Heng raised his eyebrows.

If that were the case, this journey would make perfect sense for him. Earlier, Mr. G showed Zhang Heng his grand scheme, trying to inspire him through the collective appeal displayed by the society’s bottom level. And for the last stop, Miss F was there to persuade him from a similar perspective.

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Even Zhang Heng had to admit that it was indeed a very effective method. If he were really a clone, coupled with his relationship with Miss F, it would be difficult for Zhang Heng to ignore the fate of other clones. However, Zhang Heng didn’t expect Miss F to shake her head.

“No. I did have such a thought before, but I have given up on it.”

“Why? Have you found out that I am not easily persuaded?”

“No, because I don’t want to become one of those people.”

“What people?”

“Those people who write the memories for us,” Miss F said. “What I have been trying to do is to liberate my compatriots from the false life goals. Hence, I will not try to instill the idea of something that you don’t want to do in you.”

 “You encourage me to do what I want to do, but you have to carry the burden of liberating the entire population? Don’t you think this is self-contradictory?”

“I am different from you. It is indeed my goal in life to liberate our kind. Oh… the expression on your face, I know what you are thinking. You must be thinking that I am also one of Mr. G’s fanatics influenced by him. That’s why I’m devoted to what I do now. But this time, you are wrong. The reason I chose this path has nothing to do with him.

“After being rescued by Mr. G, I also experienced a long period of confusion. To be honest, I didn’t expect that I would survive the surgery until I opened my eyes, especially after discovering that my previous wishes and memories were all false. I lost one of my arms too, and I once doubted whether I had enough courage to live on.”

“For a short while, I suspected I’d never escape from that nightmare. After I ran out of the manor, I was quickly located by the people from the company. They rewrote the memories in my mind, making me think that I’m out of control and regained freedom. The moment I lowered my guard, their people would suddenly appear in front of me, enjoying the desperation on my face.”

“It’s reasonable. This is what they are good at. In that manor, these sorts of things happen again and again. Due to some accident, I got out of control that night. I live in the same fear every day. This fear and torture almost drove me mad until I start to contact our kinds in my life actively.”

“Why?”

“In the beginning, I was just trying to find out if anyone had gone through the same experience as me. From there, I tried to speculate when my nightmare will come again. However, once I get to know them in-depth, the desire to do something for them becomes stronger and stronger. It even overrides my fear of the future. I don’t have a family, and I don’t know who my parents are. But, through them, I can feel a sense of intimacy. By then, my emotions had stabilized.”

“Because of this, Mr. G bought this nursing home while he was on the verge of bankruptcy and gave it to me, so I could use it as a secret base to contact other clones. From there, I modified the place and turned it into a clone paradise. In the midst of it, I finally found my goal in life. I want to do more for them and grant them freedom. This is the belief that keeps me moving forward, and how I gained the strength I have today,” Miss F moved her mechanical arm while speaking.

“But this is my life’s goal, not yours. Thus, it would be best if you found the meaning of your existence. This may be difficult, especially for a clone, but definitely worth a try.”