After Alex flew off, there goes my love story with him. It really frustrating that he really left me here. I’m still don’t believed myself that he is gone back. Leaving me behind. My head still had vision of Alex that I could not get out from, not after what we had sex a day before he went back to Malaysia. Ahhhh!!! Don’t Nat, just try not to remember, it's really embarrassing. But now I’m alone, I’m scared that no one is looking after me, listening to my rantings, and even deeply understand me. But what am I going to do now? Alex is not with me.
I really wanted to be with him, gods knows what he will do after the stunts he did in LA. I stay in my room, feeling what people should act while in being depressed, I just could not do anything at all. I don’t know. Alex what would you do in this situation?
I just sit next to a window of my little room the in attic where Alex always hangs around here.
“Nat!! Where the heck did you hide my comics!!”
“I’m bored now…”
“Come on let’s go outside now”
“Nat” “Nat”
“Nat, see ya…”
Tears flows down to my cheeks, 5 years of our relationship being together never been apart suddenly come to an end.
“Nat!! Someone is calling you!!”
“Its must Alex!!, he must have arrive in Malaysia!!” I’m soo excited now, what I would ask him, what is he doing now? I can’t wait. I run straight to the kitchen and pick up the phone.
“Alex!! You have arrived!! I miss you already!!”
It's someone else in on the phone. A girl.
“Whoa!! Hang on babe, it's me Mariam. Guess you forget about me…”
“No, no I just that someone I cared deeply have left…”
“Someone died, oh I’m sorry for your loss…”
“NO!! I just….its….just…..he went back to Malaysia…”
Hick, hick….. I hardly try to said anything to Mariam, and Mariam try to console me
“Babe….Nat tell me what’s going on?”
“He just left me!! He went back to his home country!! Waaa!!!”
“Huh!?, calm down will ya!! Take a deep breath, Babe…Babe!!!”
“mmm….I’m calm now…”
“Boys sure love making a girl cry…”
“no….he is not the type to cry…”
“I mean you!! Babe you gotta get head right!! You better than this!!”
“Yeah…he does make a girl cry, every time….”
“Yeah…typical….leaving a cute babe like you…”
“Yeah!! He does!! I’m pretty sure he must seen even more pretty girls other than me!!
“I’m not sure about that…”
“I really glad that you call, I was about to have a nervous breakdown…”
“Take a deep breath babe…you stronger than this….”
“What are you doing now, are you still in New York??”
“Nope, I’m in Sabah, Malaysia, yeah….I think right now, I’m in KK or Kota Kinabalu…”
Alex did mention to me that he went back to Kota Kinabalu. I really wanted her to find him for me but I’m embarrassed to say it. I’m madly in love with him, why did I wrote that letter that he could get along with other girls? That is stupid of me!! I really need to know where he is now….
“Mar….” That’s her nickname is use to call her
“Yeah Nat?”
“Could you do me a favour?”
“What will that be Babe?”
“If you found Alex, could you tell me everything, when every time you meet him…please Mar….”
“Babe….but I’m not sure I could find him….or how does he looks like babe…”
“Remember I told you about him before…”
“But that outfit he wore, like that’s those hooligans in Harlem you know!?”
“He is asian, I think roughly 5’5, he had a scar from his right arm and lots of scar in his body…”
I begun to blushed just remembering how he look like. What the hell am I thinking!!? I need to be specific!! So Mar could find him!!
“His eyes is dark brown, slightly smaller that of a sleepy eyes….his dark brown hair is a bit scruffy”
“Got it…Babe…. And don’t worry babe, but there is a lot of boys there you know, who knows that you will fall in love with someone else…”
“I don’t know yet…but….”
“Fine then….I will look for him…not sure about this crazy stuff you telling me….”
“Thanks….but what are you doing in Malaysia? I thought you’re in that prestigious school in New York, you’re a star…?”
“Yeah….because of family…”
“Yeah Alex left because of family as well”
“I’m pretty sure his family wanted to return home as well, homesickness like that, because I lived my life in New York, so I don’t understand how my mom feel about home.”
“yeah…”
“But tell me more what’s going on about your relationship with Alex…I just tired you said Alex, Alex, Alex every-time we talk…”
“Alex is special to me alright…I don’t know how to express that….I made a promise to his mom…that I’m going to marry him….”
“Babe…that’s commitment you know…I don’t know about marriage but that is way over the top…”
“I don’t know….but I can’t bear to think without him…”
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“Babe….?”
“Yeah…”
“This is a crazy and stupid question but I had to ask…”
“What is it?”
“Did you do it?”
“Huh!?”
“I mean did you two, do….that….thing…ummm….joining together?”
“Huh!? What are you talking about Mar!?”
“ughhh….SEX!!!”
My mind turn blank and my ears getting hotter, my brain started to shut down, my face turn red. I could hear my own heartbeat. When Mar suddenly said that word…
“Do I need to answer it now…?”
“ummm…yeah….because….it’s important in how I would act with Alex soon….”
“……..”
“Babe…?”
“…….ummm….”
“Babe you did it right?”
“………ummm…” i can’t do it…
Its impossible to admit it to Mar there is no way in chance but. Do I really need to answer that?
“I think I know the answer, when I meet with Alex….I have a knack of finding virgins and non virgins by just smelling it”
Huh!? What the hell!? Wait, is she going find out herself? I had to do something, or not Alex is going to be pissed or I will die of embarrassment.
“Mar, other than that please don’t do anything stupid…. please Mar…”
“We’ll see….” I know that Mariam is going to find out.
“Then other than Alex….everything about his body what else?”
“Umm…I missed his cute little sister, Hana…. She is really cute….Alex also had a little baby brother…Sam his name….”
“ah…that’s interesting…”
“I’ve also made a promise to Hana that I’m going to marry Alex….”
“Oh did you, well that’s makes sense…Babe….there is lot more boys than meets the eyes you know maybe there is a reason why God separate you guys to see a lot more of the world…”
“maybe…but…”
“No buts!! If you want him really bad, you gotta prove yourself that again, you cute babe!! If you really want him back and he really doesn’t want to leave you, be special to him!! You know what I mean!!”
“yeah…yeah!! I will!! I’m going to make sure that will happen!!”
“That’s my Nat!!”
“But Mar, promise me to call me back okay?”
“Yeah, yeah… when I had the time okay?”
“Bye now Babe…don’t worry I’ll make sure Alex doesn’t find any girls…”
“Thanks…Mar…”
“Yeah…”
I hung up the phone. Now I have a new mission, I’m going to make sure I had to be better than anyone else to the point Alex will look to me again like I wrote to Alex before. I head straight to meet dad. I see him in his personal office. I approach him.
“dad…”
“What is it? Nat you’re okay?” I muster my courage and said to him
“I want to change… I want to be different dad…”
Dad close his note and pen while open his reading glasses. He look at me straight in the eye.
“So? What that will be for you? And for me?”
“Dad, I want to learn to become like you and follow you around the world. I promise myself that I’m going to push myself beyond my capability”
“That’s is a big statement, is this because of Alex?”
“No…”
“Why not? You know since you meet Alex, you have change, you never listen to me before but when Alex is with you..you able to see things differently and you know how to control, but the question is why not?”
“is not just because of Alex, is about myself, I want quickly to complete my high school, and started with university earlier than anyone and even Alex. I just want to show him and dad what I’m going to become. I’m not going to slow down and when I meet with Alex again, I’m going to push him together with me even if I had to drag him.”
Dad smile and suddenly laugh
“Hahahahahahaha!! My girl has grown up…” “thanks Alex….”
He started to recall Alex again.
“Fine, you know its not going to be easy with me, I’m going to push you beyond the capability of a kid supposed to lived but I will not held you for your interest in arts”
“Thanks dad” I hug him, I’m glad that I had an understanding father.
“Well then, I’m going to make you to become my successor”
“I will make you to be a beautiful bride” Phylis and Mom said to me
“Thanks, wait for me Alex….we will meet again, and this time, I promise you, that you head over heels over me again…”
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