Chapter 9: Chapter 5: Not Saving the Girl

V1P8A

*rumble* *whinnying*

“Secure the monastery!”  “Check the walls!”  “Search all buildings!”

The big double doors at the other end of the cathedral have already been smashed to splinters and even parts of the walls beside them are gone.  So in the fading daylight it's easy to see all the metal the newcomers are wearing as they and their horses pile up outside.

These must be the fantasy knights.  Ugh.  What a bother.

“Oh well, more for the slaughter.”  Sigh and turn towards the entrance, walking down the altar and stepping in front of the pedestal I arrived on.  “Hey!  Sir-Not-Appearing-In-This-Film!  We're closed!  Come back tomorrow!”

It's only fair to give them a chance to wise up.

*stampede*

My words don't seem to register though as dozens charge into the church.  A few then start throwing up at the sights and smells of the carnage before them.  One even slips and falls into a puddle of blood and gore.

Is this a Tide ad?

Man that is some fancy duds they've got on.  Most have a mix of plate and chain mail, helmets with hinged visors, and kite shields.  No one in full plate though.  Can they not make it yet?  A few look much more lightly armored.  Is that leather?

All have, what's it called, a surcoat?  White with some sort of gold flower stitched on.  Shields are also white and have the same flower painted on.  A rose maybe?

The bucket-head with the fanciest, even has wings on his helmet, armor seems downright frantic.

“Brother!  Oracle!  Where are you?!”

“Oi!  Does it look like anyone survived?!”

Yell back as I slowly sweep my swords across the debris and gore.  The girls are far enough behind me that they are hidden behind the altar by the rubble and shadows.

Knight 1 points his sword my way.

“Who are you?!  Did you do this?!”  Mister walking toaster is upset.

Queue knight 2.

“Be careful captain!  He has a powerful aura.”  Aura?  Are you a hippie?  “We cannot treat him lightly!”

Hmm…  Holy symbol looking medallion thing, mace, yep, bet he’s a fantasy cleric guy.

“Sorry tin can!”  Hehe.  Tin can.  “When I got here the only ones left were the demons and their dates!  Don't worry though!  Those girls were having fun!”

Nudge, nudge.  Wink, wink.

“You, bastard!”  Well that's rude.  “How dare you pollute their virtue with your filth!  I will carve the truth out of your soul!”

Bring it on!

Fantasy cleric guy?  Hey, don't get in his way.  Damn duel blocker.  Was about to have a cool action scene!

“Please sire!  Stop!  What if he is the hero?”  Shit.  They aren't all stupid.  “Look at his hands!  We know those swords.  One is the Divine Blade of Sanriel, Sanctity.  Brought here for the hero to wield.  The other is the Infernal Sword of Urnithun, Tormentor.”  What are they all gasping for?  “Anyone who can hold both must-”

“Can we get this moving?!”  Impatient pose, twirl swords around as I interrupt him.  And I'm the only one who gets to monologue here, buddy.  “I've got people to kill and you are fucking with my schedule!”

“Uh... What?”

Is all captain tin can manage.  Geesh.  No wonder the demons are winning.

Honestly though?  I'm probably gonna die.  Feel wiped.  Can barely stand.  My body feels hollow.

The tin can squad looks pretty tired but they are holding those swords and spears like they know how to use them.  Couple of them are even saying some magic sounding shit and glowing circles are floating by them.

If I die, can I go home?  Would really like to hug my wife and kids again.  Hell, I'll even pet the dog.

Give fancy pants the crazy eye.

“You ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?”  Gotta love the classics.  Even though my storm of magic nitro feels more like a breeze now?  Bet I can still take a few of them with me.  “Ramming spee- Eh?”

“Stop!”  A woman screams.

Miss complains-a-lot, pointy ears, barely dressed in bloodied rags, is suddenly in front of me.  Standing tall with arms and legs spread.  Well, tall for her.  She barely reaches my chest.  Posed like her body will keep our swords from crossing.  Keep the magic at bay.

But why is she facing them instead of me?  Ain’t I the bad guy?

“Avi!”  Tin can freezes.  “You're alive!  Thank the goddess!”

What is up with all the gasping?  Maybe it's a genetic defect?  Inbreeding?  Forced to watch the Hallmark Channel?

“Oracle!”  “She lives!”  “There is hope!”  “Princess!”

Tin can's crew is suddenly talkative.  Wait... Princess?  Shit.  Isn't princess killing generally frowned upon?  Wouldn't want to get in trouble with the fuzz.

Might get a ticket.

Another knight, a lightly armored one with a staff, wizard in a can, speaks up.

“Oracle Avalina!  What happened?  Did the ritual succeed?”

The knights are spreading out now.  Trying to surround me.  Only see the back of her head but easy elf seems to be staring straight at captain tin can.

“Theo…”  Wow, that shudder travelled from her head to her toes.  “I… failed.  It's my fault.  Duke Airnett, the Grey Sage, everyone.  All dead, because of me!”

Awkward… 

Tin can ain't buying it.

“No Avi!  Please do not.  It cannot be your-”

“I failed!”  Nice scream.  Good volume and distance.  “And I deserved too!”  Ugh. Can feel a rant coming.  “I thought I was serving the goddess!”  Fancy pants had started to walk forward but this froze him again.  “Schemed to steal a holy ritual.  Emptied the treasury while the people starve and sell their children.”  Her arms have fallen and she's shaking all over.  “Even killed a child with my own hands.”

Case solved.  Book 'er Danno.

“Avi... Stop.”

“All to steal another child from another world.”  Those knees are looking a might shaky.  “Taking a child from his family.  From everyone who loves him.  And for what?”  And down she goes.  “Fight, kill, die, for our war?”  She is still staring at tin can.  “That was not faith Theo.  That was fear!”  Is this girl a masochist?  “I was wrong!  So those who followed me suffered!”

Captain tin can is speechless, but fantasy cleric guy isn't.

“Oracle.  Is, that, the hero?”

Hey there buddy.  “That” has feelings you know.

Easy elf manages to shakily get back on her feet.

“He is not the hero, but he is of the hero.”  Of the hero?  “And I have wronged him.”  Uh oh.  Let's see how boyfriend handles this.  “I must atone for my sacrilege.  My heresy.”  Yep, back to staring at tin can.  Hope he got some before the demon gang bang.  “So, I… have bound myself to him.”  Bound?

Tin can is steaming.

“No Avi!  I will not allow this!”

Guess he didn't get a piece of her tail first.  Bummer dude.

“It is t-too late Theo.  I a-am s-sorry.”  Kowtowing now?  She does have a nice ass.  It's big but not too big.  “I am already his s-slave.”  Say what?  Why is she showing them the back of her left hand?  “I have already bound myself to him.”  Uh, no you didn't.

Wait, where did this tattoo on my left hand come from?

… 

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That bitch!  Is this isekai slave magic?  Seriously?  God dammit!

About to run two blades through sneaky slut's butt when tin can screams and falls to his knees.  Huh?  What happened?  Wait.  Is this isekai netorare?  Did I misread the tags?

And what the fuck would I want a slave for?  Of course there's “that,” but this banged up used car has way too many miles on her.

Hehe.  Banged up.  

Dammit.  I got played.

“Oracle Avalina.”  Wizard in a can, chimes in.  “You must know that neither the king nor the pope will accept this.”

Whoa.  They got a pope?  Did tin can just perk up?  Yep, he's back on his feet.

Jesus, the way these two keep going up and down is like watching the Richard Simmons sex tape.  Fucking the oldies.

“Th-that is right!  We will force this beast to release you.”

Hey, his helmet's off now.  This “Theo” ain't a bad looker.  Somehow, that pisses me off.  But, wow, that is a pathetically desperate look on his face.  Christ, he's crying too.

Is this the planet of the drama llamas?  Ugh.  Dude, your whatever love interest is broken.  Find someone else to pine over.  Wait, does he suffer from chronic bitch dependency?

Tin can, bitch dependency is no laughing matter.  Addiction to a bitch can fuck with your friends.  Your health.  And scarily enough, even your money.

It's a disease, tin can.  Get help.

“Theo!  I do not want you to die too!”  Spreads her arms again.  In the twilight I can just make out the tattoo on her left hand.  It matches mine.  This conniving bitch.  “He has Urnithun's sword?  He took it after beating the demon lord to death, with his bare hands!”

Well, with my bare arm, uh, technically his bare arm but please.  This is supposed to be a happy occasion.  Let’s not bicker and argue over who killed who.

Oh yeah, I'm still naked.  The censors must be freaking the fuck out.  Are they blurring my wiener?

“Impossible.”

Hey, it's big but it's not “that” big.  Maybe.  Of course that’s the first thing I checked.  You wouldn’t?  Oh, you were talking about the other thing?  Sorry, my bad.

And elfy's on her knees again.  Seriously, bitch should start making exercise videos.  Demon raping to the oldies.

“Urnithun knew about the ritual and corrupted it.  He was waiting for the hero to kill him.”  She's hiding her face with her arms.  That's some anguished laughing.  “Hehe.  But that demon failed too!  He could not imagine the monster that was coming.”

“That,” then “beast,” and now “monster?”  You people are mean.

“Corrupted how?”

Ugh.  Come on fantasy cleric guy.  Think about it.  Don't be a dense douche.

The other girls appear out of the shadows behind me, walking around the pedestal.  Uh, did I miss some sort of signal?  They line up on both sides of my new slave.  The two catatonic girls propped up by the others.  Why is princess spreading her legs?

Oh no.

“By defiling us!”

Lifting the tattered skirt she made exposes the mangled state of her “garden.”  The other girls do the same.  Fuck.  No.  This is just wrong.

The newcomers react with pity and recoil in disgust.  And I can't blame them.  I've seen it.  It's brutal.

Tin can barely squeaks out.

“Avi… No…”

“They made us their playthings!  We have been filled with demon seed!  Cursed!  Become sows for breeding monsters!”

By the end the girl is screeching.

This is too much.  Lay the swords down and reach around the ones exposing themselves.  Pushing the rags back down to cover them.  As I do, they collapse into a sobbing heap of abused kids.

Yeah, can’t do this anymore.  I’m done.

Look to the heavens for strength.  Oh, the sun has finished setting.  Think this is called “dusk.”  Some knights now have floating balls of light next to them, so there is enough light to see with.  Through the holes in the roof, the sky fills with stars.

“I do not care!”  Did tin can's voice just crack?  How old is he?  “I have always loved you Avi!  I still want you to be my wife!”

Wow, too soon dude.  The girls start crying even harder.

Wizard in a can walks up and puts his hand on tin can's shoulder.

“Sire Airnett.  You may not care, but your house does.  The king does.  The church does.  Even the people do.”  Hey.  She just had tanks drive through her garden.  She didn't die.  “This is a tragedy that even the goddess must be crying over but with your brother gone?  Theovald, you are the duke now.  You cannot wed one who has been sullied.  Nor can you associate with the curse-”

“I know that!”  Tin can interrupts, screaming at him.  But that's the last he can manage.  He's finally spent.  “This is not over, but we cannot decide things now.  I am… tired.  Setup camp and cleanse the bodies of our friends and comrades.  Purify the demons.”  He points a finger at me.  “Setup a tent for that too, and dispatch messengers.  The king, pope, and marquis, must all be told.”

*swoosh*

I'm wondering if I should kill them anyway when my instincts scream “MOVE” at me again.  I slide left, just missing a dagger stabbed at my neck.  Grab the wrist holding it, twist, spin, and throw her forward.  See bat lady fly by.

Oh, oops, forgot about her.

Slutty demon lands face first halfway between the knights and girls.  Shakily stands up.

“Vilesh's tits, what are you?!  Even with [Deep Shroud] you still saw me!  How?!”  She is so livid, spittle is flying out of her mouth.

“A succubus!  Now things are starting to make sense.”  Tin can looks mad again, and glad?  “Bind her.  We will begin the interrogation immediately.”

Uh, yeah, girl?  That's a “you gonna get raped” look.  Hey.  Tin can.  Isn't the “love of your life,” like, right here?

The lady with the tail turns to face fancy pants.

“You think I'm going to let vermin like you touch me?"  She takes up the same spread arms and legs pose easy elf took earlier.  "I am a greater being than those cows you rut with.  My pride remains intact!"

“[True Death]”

*fruuzh*

“Aaiiyyee!!!”

As her hands meet in a clap above her head, her entire body ignites in blue flames.  She's screaming, a lot, and we all get a front row seat to a woman burning to death.

There's that bacon smell again.

Well, burnt bacon.

---

Airnett, Nigelle (male, human, tourinese)

• Former Duke of Tourin
  • Duchy of Esheoran, one of three Tourinese duchies
• Famous swordsman
• Theovald Airnett's older brother
• Deceased

Airnett, Theovald (male, human, tourinese)

• Duke of Tourin
  • Duchy of Esheoran
• Nigelle Airnett's younger brother
• Royal Knight Captain
  • White Rose
• “Tin can,” “Captain tin can,” “Fancy pants”

Angelles, Avalina Faphyri (female, elf-human, tourinese)

• Slave
  • Of the hero?
• Former Princess
  • Kingdom of Tourin
• “Avi,” “Easy elf,” “Elfy”

Apenstoe, Regohn (male, human, tourinese)

• Friend and subordinate of Theovald Airnett
• Royal Knight Vice Captain
  • White Rose

Chavorat, Tibbott (male, human, tourinese)

• Friend and subordinate of Theovald Airnett
• Royal Knight
  • White Rose
• Light Mage
• “Wizard in a can”

Enflow, Erwalt (male, human, tourinese)

• Friend and subordinate of Theovald Airnett
• Royal Knight
  • White Rose
• Cleric of Metia
• “Fantasy cleric guy”

Noseul, Dradus (male, human, tourinese)

• the Grey Sage
• Famous wizard
• Deceased

Zuzzoros, Khirsa (female, demon, drasritorn)

• "Slutty demon,” “Bat lady,” “Ex-succubus"
• Deceased

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