Chapter 50: Chapter 50 – Laurin’s Wishes

A series of light knocks could be heard coming from the door. My visitor seemed hesitant as if he or she wasn't sure whether it was acceptable to disturb me or not, but soon enough the sound gained strength. So much that I could no longer ignore it even if I wanted to.

“Please enter!”

I already knew who it was. The way he had knocked was more than enough to tell me. The fairytale guy was the only one in this whole castle who would not only think twice but several times more before finally deciding to enter my private rooms.

After days of staying at this place it was easy to tell him apart from the servants, who, contrary to him, just entered whenever they wished to - be it while I was sleeping, bathing or drowning myself in memories of a more colorful past. This was how things were handled in this palace, with servants being treated as if they were invisible as long as they weren't needed.

When the door finally swung open, it was indeed Laurin that appeared in between its frames. He was wearing the same red and black uniform-like attire his father had on when I first met them, and it fit him far too well.

This was about where the similarities between the two ended, however, since Laurin lacked the confidence and authority king Hensin extruded with every single of his words and actions. I could only hope he wouldn’t grow fat when the sole way of avoiding the awkward silence that filled this room way too often seemed to be to stuff us with food.

Even though we sometimes had trouble keeping our conversations going, I had grown fond of him by now. Not because I saw him as a man, I would never, but because he helped me escape the boredom that drove me crazy whenever there was nobody around. It was a friendship of some sort, one that came to be without my doing.

“How was your day,” Laurin asked while I was still lost in thoughts.

And there it was again, this stupid question. How could it possibly have been? I was trapped in this room all day long! Sure, there were neither locks nor bars hindering me from opening that door, but there was an armed man ‘guarding’ me right outside in the hallway. The few times I had been outside of the room, Laurin had always been by my side.

“It was exciting,” I couldn't help but joke.
“Sorry about that.”
“There is no reason for you to feel sorry. It was your father who had decided on it…”
“I will talk to him!”
“He will never let me go…”
“But he can at least allow you to go outside!”
“Outside? Where to?”
“I could show you the gardens.”
“That would be nice…”
“He will surely allow you to accompany me to my sword training, too!”
“You really think he will allow me to touch swords?”
“... you could watch me.”

I could only look at him in disbelief. Laurin seemed to love to stare at me, as he visited my rooms more often than his own, but for him to think I would feel the same about him? As if I could answer his love!

Naturally, I couldn't tell him. By hurting his feelings I might end up hurting myself in the long run, as he was the sole relief I had from my otherwise monotone days. And watching him wave around his sword might end up helping me, too, as I had little to no idea on how to fight without using magic.

“I would be glad to,” I finally answered.

A faint red appeared on his face. He had misunderstood me, again.

“I- I wanted to ask if you want to eat with me.”
“With you?”
“Eh- us! I meant us! I wanted to invite you to dinner. Did you eat yet?”
“No, I have waited for you to come and collect me.”
“You did? Ah- yes, I told you yesterday!”
"Yes..."

A faint sigh slipped my lips as I lifted the fox up from my lap and placed it on one of the soft pillows lying next to me. Despite weighing about as much as a small cat, it sank in deeply. It didn’t even wake up from being lifted like that.

“Have you finally picked a name for her?”
I shook my head. “I wanted to wait until she woke up.”
“But she is your summon, isn't she? Can't you just send her back and call her again? Maybe it will help…”
“Do you think she is a PC?”
“Pe Ci?”
“It's nothing…”

Laurin looked at me confused, but I didn't give him a chance to ask his question again. I had already raised up to make my way towards him or rather the door he was still blocking.

“What are we waiting for?” I asked him. “Let’s meet your family!”

 

⊱————　❈　————⊰

 

Minutes later, we were already sitting at a long table that had various pots and dishes with meat, soups and fruit waiting for us. Not only a way too heavy meal was standing in front of me, there was also the whole royal family with king Hensin, his wife and daughter and Laurin himself, who sat on my left side.

Naturally, I was at the center of attention. King Hensin especially made sure to try to read all my wishes from my lips, which honestly made me rather shy away instead. I couldn’t even fully savor the meat Laurin himself had placed in front of me, as each bite was accompanied by the full attention of the family.

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It was only after I had finished eating that the situation changed and Hensin focused his attention on his family instead. He waited for Laurin to finish his meal to then tell him to meet him later in his private rooms.

That was all that was said, but the words somehow seemed to carry a lot more meaning, since Laurin took them as a chance to excuse himself and quietly leave the room, leaving me behind with his family. He looked nervous and happy at the same time while doing so, which obviously left me startled. Something was up.

Laurin’s sister and mother followed him soon after. They had lacked his anxiety, revealing nothing but glee instead. It was obvious they knew something they weren't willing to reveal to me.

Janna, Laurin's sister, was younger than him by three years, making her almost seem like a child, though she did her best to appear like a lady instead. Contrary to her brother, she had the brown hair and eyes of their father, which was rather unlucky considering how angelic she might have looked with blonde hair instead.

Despite being that young, or rather exactly because she was that age, Janna was very interested in the non-existing romance between me and her brother. She was always asking about it when I met her, not directly but rather subtle instead.

I somehow had managed to fend off all of Janna's attacks while staying polite and friendly, but it was a whole different story for their mother, queen Arienne. She was far more direct in her questions, turning our few conversations into nothing short of an interrogation.

While playing with her long, pale blonde hair, she would stare at me with her sapphire eyes, as if trying to interpret each change happening in my expression. It went without saying that I went nervously almost immediately with this angelic beauty looking at me like that.

Somehow, I had avoided all of her attacks so far. When asked what I think about her son, I just told her that he is friendly and polite while carefully avoiding any mention of him being the hunk he was without a question. Laurin was attractive, that one went without saying, but I would never tell her that in her face. And I wouldn’t start liking him just because of that!

Now that all of them were gone, leaving me alone with their husband or father, I was feeling more trapped than ever before. He was the most influential man in this country, maybe even in this whole world. I knew way too little about him or anything as if I could judge how powerful he really was.

There was only one fact I was sure of: he could do whatever he liked to me, and me being a saint or fox didn't change a thing about this. Sure, the citizens would probably revolt upon finding out he had harmed me, but here in the palace, they had no eyes. He could just order his men to kill me, to toss me into a dark and damp prison or to beat me up. Nobody would hinder him.

Until now, he had never even hinted at abusing his power like that. He had been both open-hearted and frank to me, which made me feel awkward and nervous around him rather than comfortable, as I was a total stranger to him. If he was that friendly to a stranger and commoner, he obviously was benefiting from it in some way. And I didn't know how yet.

“Have you managed to settle in yet,” Hensin asked after the others had left the room.
“More or less.”
“What is it that troubles you?”
“I barely ever get to leave those rooms…”
“You are bored?”
“Yes,” I answered, “and I miss my friends…”

How could I not feel bored and lonely? I had gone from having adventures to being confined in an oversized cage within days! I couldn't read any of the books in the study room, nor could I go out and do sports or at least take a stroll in the gardens Laurin had told me about. They would never let me train my magic or learn how to wield a sword or use a bow.

There was nothing I could do. And Laurin? He had everything he wanted. Sure, he couldn't just go into the city and waste money in random shops, as he would be in constant danger, but he at least had something like hobbies that were fun enough for him to spend hours talking about them.

I was envious and depressed. Envious of anybody out there, living their lives with all their struggles, the freedom and the burdens that came with it. And depressed because I had been one of them, at least for those few weeks.

“If it wasn't for him visiting me, I would go crazy…”
“Him? You mean Laurin?”
“Yes…”
“That is what I wanted to talk about.”
“About Laurin?”
“Yes.”

He took a sip from his cup, placed it down and pushed it away before finally asking his question. Seeing him like this, I couldn't help but gulp my salvia.

“What is this about? I don't like this!”
“I wish for you to become part of our family.”
I stared at him in disbelief. “You want to adopt me?”

I knew he wasn't talking about this. He was talking about something far more threatening, something I couldn't even accept thinking about. But no matter how much I wished to deny the possibility of it happening, Hensin just brought it up regardless. 

“So hasn't told you yet. I should have known.” He sighed. “Laurin fancies you.”
“Fancies me…”

Something inside of me crumbled to dust. I was ok with him being a friend, I was even ok with him falling in love with me, but him even telling his father? This could only mean the worst!

“I want you to be his queen, should the time arrive for the gods to call me to their side.”
“...”

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