Chapter 485: Self-harm

“The child is lost. Why does it matter how my body is?” Xia Ling said hoarsely.

Pei Ziheng tried to console her. “There are so many people helping you to find him. He’ll come back. Also,” He paused before continuing. “If we really can’t find him, we can just have another child. It’s the same.”

We’ll just have another child. It’s the same.

The words flashed through Xia Ling’s mind.

She jerked her head up and looked straight into Pei Ziheng’s eyes. “Was it you? Did you lose the child and then pretend to be as anxious as I am? Are you trying to pretend to be the good person?!” The more she thought about it, the more suspicious it seemed. The security in the bungalow was impeccable. If it weren’t someone familiar with the place, how could they just kidnap the child and not leave any clues at all?

“Where did you hide my child?! Give him back to me!” She cried out.

Pei Ziheng’s face fell. “You don’t believe me?”

“Why would I believe you?” Xia Ling glared at him. “Pei Ziheng, you’ve never liked this child. Why would you suddenly want to throw him a 100-day celebration? Did you plan all of this? To make him disappear in all the chaos and commotion?” He couldn’t blame her for suspecting him as he had masterminded the abortion incident during her pregnancy. What did Pei Ziheng say the medicine was then? A calming medication? Under these circumstances, how could she believe him at all?

Pei Ziheng’s grimaced. “It’s not me.”

“Then find my child for me! Since you forced me to marry you, why didn’t you take good care of my child?! Pei Ziheng, if I knew something like this would happen, maybe I should have just gone back to Li Lei when I could. Perhaps my child would still be safe and sound!” Xia Ling started to say anything that came to her mind.

Pei Ziheng grabbed onto her collar. “You’re still pining for that wild man?!”

“He’s not a wild man!”

Pa!

Pei Ziheng seemed fond of slapping her recently, and even he couldn’t understand this compulsion. Every time he was with her, she always seemed to be able to make his temper flare out of control. He looked down coldly at her as she clutched at her face, tears brimming in her eyes, and heard her say, “Pei Ziheng, is this slap because you’re feeling guilty? Return my child…”

“Child?” Pei Ziheng became even angrier as he gave a cold laugh. “Okay, I’ll return you a child.” He inched closer to her menacingly and pinned her onto the bed with his long legs. “Let’s have one right now.”

“Dream on!” Xia Ling’s felt a mix of terror and anger as she pushed against him with all her might.

He did not budge. “Xia Ling, aren’t you desperate for a child? Don’t expect me to control myself today! Don’t even try to escape!” He reached out, ready to tear her clothes off.

Xia Ling was terrified and beat him with both hands in a frenzy. She managed to roll off the bed with difficulty when there was a small opening. “Don’t come over!” She grabbed a fruit knife on the bedside table and pointed it at Pei Ziheng, her hands shaking. “Don’t… don’t you dare come over here!”

She was putting up a strong front.

Pei Ziheng looked over at her with a cold expression, remaining calm and collected.

“Put down the knife.” His tone of voice was commanding, not leaving any room for negotiation.

But, how could Xia Ling put the knife down?

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She continued to point the knife at him and backed away as he came closer and closer until her back was against the wall. “Don’t come over here! Do you hear me?!” Her voice started to shake as well, as she realized that she had no place to run to.

Pei Ziheng continued to come closer, step by step, watching as she curled into the corner of the room. He said, “Do you dare stab me? Come and stab me… right over here.” He pointed to his chest, right above his heart. “Xia Ling, if you can’t stab me, then just do as I say and give me a child.”

“You… you… Don’t think I won’t dare!” Her hands shook even more, and her voice broke.

She had never even killed a chicken, let alone a person, in this life or her past life. She might have seemed wilful and lawless in her past life but, in fact, she was a coward when anything bloody was involved. “Pei Ziheng, don’t come over! Don’t come over!”

Pei Ziheng kept walking forward.

Xia Ling knew that he was a man of his words and would not let her go today if she didn’t do anything. Her voice became weaker, and she started to plead with him. “Not today… really… not today… We haven’t found my baby… Can you let me find my baby first? When I’ve found him, I’ll have a child with you…”

“And what makes you think I will believe you?” Pei Ziheng sneered. He was now almost right in front of her.

“Stop where you are!” Xia Ling’s voice became harsh again in her terror. “If you take another step, I will really stab you!”

“I told you to stab me right in the heart.” Pei Ziheng retorted calmly. “If I die in your hands, so be it. Didn’t you kill Wang Jingwan? Killing someone shouldn’t be a hard task for you. Xia Ling, you should kill me if you can. If you don’t, then I take it as you are willing to have a child with me.”

“I’m not willing!” She cried out.

“Don’t fool yourself. You’re willing.”

Pei Ziheng was right in front of her, his tailored suit touching the tip of her knife.

Xia Ling steeled herself and flipped the fruit knife around to point at herself. She plunged the knife straight into her abdomen! Blood gushed out immediately, dying her white pajamas a bright crimson.

“What are you doing?!” Pei Ziheng’s expression darkened.

Xia Ling leaned on the wall and slid towards the ground. Her face was pale, but there was a light smile on her lips. She no longer had the strength to hold onto the fruit knife, and it fell out of her hands onto the carpet.

Pei Ziheng took a huge step forward and hugged her to his chest. He pressed down onto the gushing wound on her abdomen, attempting to stop the bleeding. “Are you crazy?!”

“Yes… I am… crazy…” She spoke with difficulty with the loss of blood, her voice sounding weak. “Pei Ziheng, yes, you’re right. I can’t bring myself… to kill you… but… I… I can… kill myself. You want another kid? You… you made my child disappear… so… I will also make it such that you can never have a child…”

“You lunatic.” Pei Ziheng’s voice was void of emotion.

However, Xia Ling could see the intense hatred in his eyes.

He pulled the bell to call for the helpers to assist in calling the hospital. He carried Xia Ling in his arms and told her. “You’d better pray that your stomach is just fine. If you really can’t give birth anymore, don’t blame me for taking it out on your child.”

“You’ve already… already… made him disappear…” Tears started to fall from her eyes. “I’ve been staying by your side as you asked of me… but… you… you made my child disappear…”

Her voice faded out, and she fell unconscious.

The sirens on the ambulance rang out as they rushed Xia Ling to the hospital.

The doctor rushed her into surgery to treat her wound. When the surgery was completed, he shook his head at Pei Ziheng. “Madam was already very weak as she didn’t have good delivery. It was going to be hard for her to have another child. Now that she is injured, it is very likely that she will never have another child again.”