Chapter 201: The Despair of the Ancient Hero, Part 1

—…. I thank you very much for giving me the opportunity to have an audience with you.

I am talking to a man who was sitting in a garden.

His name is Ios. He is a man of enormous experience and he bears the nickname of the ‘God of War’.

—Who are you?

—I am a clown.

—Is that the best you’ve got? How many years do you think I’ve lived?

—Of course I’m not just a clown. I am Sain, a hero who comes from another continent.

After saying that, Ios stared at me.

A hero who calls himself a clown should be enough to attract his attention. Of course, it wasn’t going to be easy.

This is where the test begins, if I make a mistake, I run the risk of dying.

My opponent is a Demon King on a much higher plane who kills people on a whim.

—You have my attention, keep talking.

—I, Sain, have a reputation for being a clown. To be honest, I think people get it wrong, but it’s inevitable that people see me that way.

—A conscious clown, huh? That’s not new, I already have a lot of people like that.

—Of course I’m aware of it. But do you have any heroes among them who want to become a Demon King?

He was surprised by an answer he hadn’t expected.

—Do you want to be a Demon King?

—Yes. And if possible, to be more powerful than Ios-sama.

—Ku, kuku.

He turned his face in the opposite direction, and tried to stifle his laughter.

But it wasn’t enough, as my words were so funny to him that he couldn’t hold it in, and a great laugh was heard in the place.

—You are a very interesting clown, as well as funny. A hero who wants to be a Demon King, you are the first person to ask me something like that, besides wanting to be stronger than me.

—Please, I ask you to allow me to stay by your side so I can learn your power.

By gathering previous information about this Demon King, I learned that he had a lot of free time. And that his only pleasure is to watch stupid people.

While watching Zig, I thought he was a total clown. So, I thought that if I imitated him, this would turn out to be very easy.

And as you can imagine, it’s something I hate to have to do, but it’s the only way I’ll be able to convince the Demon King, I have to take every advantage, no matter how small. 

To get revenge on Toru, I have to get out of the mire I’m in.

—I’ll hire you as my personal guard. I’ll hire you as my personal guard.

—Thank you very much. I’ll serve you with all my heart and soul.

—I’ll do my best to make you laugh, too, master.

The fact that he allowed me to be with him so easily surprised me.

Afterwards, Celtina and I were assigned a room, and so our work as clowns began.

*************

The job of personal guard is surprisingly simple.

First of all, Ios didn’t need me to protect him from anything, Ios was simply by his side as if he were an ornament.

—What about the money? Do you want to die?

—I’m not a fool. I would never dare to defy him. But, we have our own problems, if things go on like this, we’ll go bankrupt.

—Why don’t we send some adventurers to clean up the mess?

—Of course we can, but the bandits are very strong. Some say that one of the bandits is the Demon King.

—A bandit demon king… That’s very interesting.

The place we were in was very scandalous. Plus we were on a different continent.

Every place we went, I found out about the existence of another Demon King. It seems there are more than I imagined.

Ios lays his eyes on me.

—You have the hero’s job. Right?

—Umm, yes…

—Then take care of this mess.

—Me?

—Yes, you, you asked me to be a Demon King, didn’t you? I suppose you’ll have the skills to take care of trifles.

******************

I climbed into Ios-sama’s vehicle and watched the scenery go by.

In the back we were accompanied by Celtina and Odis, the protector of Ios.

Odis is like Ios-sama’s right hand man, he is always by his side.

—I am too bored and sleepy~☆ I wonder when we will attack☆.

—We choose the road that is more prone to bandit attacks. The chances of encountering them should be quite high. And if you’re tired, you should go to sleep at once.

—I’ll take you at your word☆.

Celtina proceeds to make herself comfortable in the back.

—If Sain becomes the Demon King, I will become the Queen☆.

—I don’t see why not.

—My dreams are filled with magnificent food ☆, lots of pretty clothes, servants groveling before me and a glittering life ☆.

This girl is still an idiot.

And she’s very demanding, but I like that she doesn’t ask for this or that extra thing. Plus, she’s loyal to me, that makes her a good tool.

—Still no bandits are showing up, I’m tired of waiting.

Odis, who had been silent all this time, opened his mouth.

He hadn’t spoken for five hours.

—They will be here shortly. Be patient.

—Tch, I don’t like this anymore. Not only does Ios-sama let this clown be with us all the time, but he also trusts him with important matters.

I ignored the complaints Odis was saying while keeping a smile on my face.

But still, I’m also worried, if a bandit doesn’t show up soon, I’ll be in danger.

So I proceeded to create a decoy, I took out a couple of gold coins and other valuables as if it doesn’t matter what I’m doing.

This way, a bandit will surely appear soon.

We started walking and three men appeared at the end of the path to block my way.

It was a group of different races, Beasts, Demons and Dark Elf. Wow, it seems that among bandits there is no discrimination.

As soon as I stopped, 20 more came out of the bushes in front and behind me.

A quick glance at them with my appraisal skill told me that there were no demon kings among them.

—Leave the luggage you have, the money you have, and also the woman.

One of the bandits utters a phrase that sounds to me like something I’ve heard somewhere.

They are idiots.

They are not even aware that they have fallen into a trap.

They were all below level 1000. And my current level was 1200, so they’re easy prey.

—Celtina, do it.

—Yes! I’m going to burn them to death! ☆

Celtina’s magic is unleashed all over the place. Seizing the moment I drew my sword and proceeded to attack.

—Damn you elf, how dare you attack your own kind!

—I will kill whoever harms my beloved ☆.

After a few seconds, all the bandits were shot down with great ease.

A couple of bandits had also proceeded to attack Odis, but he remained relaxed and dealt with them without much difficulty.

His strength was truly overwhelming. He defeated them without drawing his weapon and with a single blow from his hand.

His level is 70,000

After cleaning up most of the mess, the person we were looking for finally appears.

—Who the hell are you? You don’t look like a simple carrier, are you an adventurer?

—Maybe yes, maybe no…

A man with an appearance not unlike that of a demon king appeared with a gait as if he had come for a stroll.

He was part of the rat tribe.

He pulled out a knife that emitted a faint evil atmosphere, perhaps some sort of demonic sword. The man licked the knife and smirked.

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—I like to kill handsome bastards who think they’re a lot. You have a beautiful woman to match your face. They disgust me. They make me want to tear her flesh and spit it out.

—Curious. I don’t like ugly bastards either. When I see them, it makes me want to stomp on them and scream expletives at them. It’s a mystery to me why the world is full of such ugly people. I’ve always wanted to burn all of you alive.

—You’re such a talker, elf boy. Begging for your life won’t work.

It’s the other way around, you idiot. I’ve already activated my hero work.

Your level keeps dropping every second we talk.

—You blinked.

—Higi?! 

The man averted his gaze for a second, and I took advantage of that gap to approach him at high speed. In the blink of an eye, I had already thrust my sword through his heart.

It would be boring to finish him off so quickly. So I swung my sword into his chest.

—Aaaagggh!!!!

Kuku, this is so much fun, murdering a bastard.

I pulled the sword out of his chest as roughly as possible, causing a large amount of blood to spill out.

The man who had fallen crawls on the ground and holds up my pants as he looks with eyes full of hatred.

—Don’t tell me you plan to beg for your life?

—Ha, ha, never, you fucking brat.

I spat in the man’s face and stomped on him.

But still, he wouldn’t let go of my hands for nothing.

—You… You… You damn brat…! You’re in for a lifetime of misfortune…!

After that, the man pulled hard on my pants, making them fall down along with my underpants.

The man then stopped pulling, but my crotch was exposed.

I pulled out my sword and tried to lift up my pants.

However, the man’s hands were tightly closed and I could not lift them up, causing me to lose my balance and fall on my buttocks.

—Pufff, hahahahahaha, you sure did a job, kid. I’m sure this report will delight Ios-sama.

Odis proceeds to mock me with laughter.

Damn it.

Don’t look at me like that.

***********************

—Ha ha ha, you’re making me die laughing! Did he really pull down your pants? What a clown you are, Sain!

Ios was laughing loudly after reading the report.

My face was burning with embarrassment.

Even though I proclaimed myself to be a clown, the embarrassment I was feeling was beyond what I was willing to endure.

I had to be patient, I knew I would be rewarded later.

—Since you’ve solved my problem, I’ll give you a reward.

—I will accept anything you give me.

—You will be my bodyguard tonight, Sain.

Ios smiles.

I merely nodded as I repressed an unbearable embarrassment.

**********************

It was midnight, and the palace was quiet.

I had served as a night escort on many occasions, but I had not yet been able to adapt myself to the circumstances in which we usually submit to this work.

—……..

I am the only one guarding the room.

There is no one around.

I gently open the door.

Through the small opening I could see into the dark room.

Ios’ eyes were wide open as he lay on the luxurious bed.

Is he one of those people who sleeps with his eyes open?

To my bad luck, he notices my presence and smiles at the sight of me.

He is definitely awake.

What the hell is that guy?

I need a blind spot so I can steal his work.

—Why don’t you come in here? You can’t protect me if you’re this far away, right?

—Yes, you’re right.

I entered the room with a bad feeling.

Did he realize what my intentions were?

Or does he intend to laugh at me like the clown I am?

In any case, it’s a unique opportunity to approach him.

—What’s the matter? Come closer.

—…It’s okay.

I approach the bed as instructed.

I wanted to take my time to steal his job as soon as he was off guard, it won’t be easy, so I’ll have to do my part to figure something out.

Suddenly, the comforter flew in the air, and the moment I blinked, he was no longer in bed.

Where did he go?

—Huh?

Ios grabbed my right arm from behind and twisted it as he pushed me down on the bed.

—You know, you’re very handsome, you’re certainly my type. You’re not clown material.

Damn, I let my guard down, this guy’s got a lot of strength.

I can’t get free.

….Wait a minute, what is he doing?

Why is he sticking his hand down my pants?

Ah! He’s touching me back there!

—Is it your first time? It’s okay, relax, you’ll feel better soon.

—No, wait!

**********************

The next morning.

I had gone completely blank.

I couldn’t think clearly and I couldn’t even eat my food.

—Sain, what’s wrong? ☆, you’ve been absent-minded all day ☆

—…Yes.

—You look like you’ve been robbed of something valuable ☆

—…Yes, it’s been stolen from me.

My buttocks hurt.

I was supposed to steal something from him, not me.

I didn’t come back from the dead for this.

I want revenge on Toru…. Ugh.

I don’t know why, but tears well up spontaneously.

—I wonder if we can steal his work from him☆

—I want to die.

—I honestly don’t know how you’ll do it☆ But hurry up, I want to get rich quick☆.

This woman…damn it, she doesn’t even know what I’m going through.

My ass, my ass.

How it hurts…

The more I remember it, the more I want to cry.

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