Chapter 44: 44 CHAPTER XIII "Shaking Emotion"

I wondered if there was any trace of Kalia's tightening around my throat.

I thought about it and rubbed it, but there was nothing special to the touch. I let out a sigh of relief, and swallowed the ale down my throat as if to swallow my anxiety and frustration.

Kalia's eyes were narrowed in thought as she put her hand to her lips. She occasionally glances at me.

Give me a break. There's not much more we can do.

"Oh, for my childhood friend. I see, that's why you're walking on burned iron.

He nodded a few times and muttered to himself as if to convince himself. She nodded several times and muttered to herself to convince herself. I don't know, I hope I've convinced you.

There was no way I could tell him everything. In fact, if I were to tell them seriously about the existence of that mysterious shadow, or about my coming back from the future, they would question my sanity.

But I told them everything else. I told him about Alueno, that my goal was to become a great adventurer, and that I was going to use the coming turmoil as an opportunity to do so. He didn't talk about the feelings he had for Herdt Stanley and the others that were swirling around inside of him, though.

This was the best I could do for Kalia. She trusts me as a friend and wants to be with me. Yes, the woman I once despised and dismissed as unworthy of my life. Of course, she's not the same person now. And now she's telling me that I'm one of them.

Then it's not the right attitude to take towards her to think that I'm just using her. If I'm going to respond to her feelings, I should naturally show a certain amount of sincerity, I think.

I'm just a rat with no manners or education. Therefore, this was not in accordance with any noble duty or civility, but only out of my pride and determination. It may have been a very cheap thing to do. But it was the best I could do.

Kalia finally lifted a finger from her face and nodded deeply.

"My childhood friend in the cathedral-- Alueno, you say? I see, that's why I can't give you to the heraldists willingly. You seem to have several cards in your hand, but you had a limited number of moves to start with.

Strangely enough, many of his words convinced me. But if you look at the expression on his face, he still has a thin smile on his face.

With a flick of the long sword at her hip, Kalia gulped down the ale on the table and locked eyes with me.

Her gaze seems to draw me in. The gleam of her gaze, like a silvery jewel. It takes my breath away. The moment of silence between us seemed unnecessarily long.

"I understand. I'll try to contact the self-defense organization. What? I'm surprisingly good at belly tricks. I've done some socializing.

In a light-hearted tone, Kalia's lips moved as she continued.

I'll go along with your idea this time. But that's it. From that point on, I will operate under my own judgment and reason--you have no problem with that, do you?

He nodded as if to say, "Of course.

Of course I have to. I don't want a doll in Kalia's skin. I want Kalia the person. Someone who uses reason, makes decisions on the spot, and seeks the best solutions. I want a proud knight like Caria. And that's why I can trust you.

I tell her that. Kalia's white cheeks turned slightly red. I'm not sure if it's from the ale or the rush of emotion.

"You talk a lot. But good, I won't let you get away with it. I'll work with your ......, or whatever works best for us.

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When he said that he would leave the communication on the way, his eyes were already not looking at me. Footsteps clacking and stomping on the wooden planks of the guild, Kalia walked out through the door.

Come on, me too. I have to get ready. I don't deserve to be on par with her if I'm relying on her and not doing anything myself.

He drank his share of the ale in one gulp, just as Kalia had done. The words that were about to flow out of you, pushed up by your emotions, slide down your throat. Oh, push it down. I have to push it down.

--Clank!

As I set the container down on the table, the inexplicable overflow of emotions manifests itself in my fingers and makes a sound.

Slowly, you place your hand over your mouth and suppress the emotions that are about to break out against your will. The expression and emotion that she could never show in front of Kalia. Yes, you could call it rapture.

The way Kalia showed it today. That emotion, it's unmistakable, it can be called obsession. She was showing an obsession so strong it could be called a sin. And she was no one. Not Held Stanley, not any other man. She was showing it to me.

I could feel the sticky emotions that had settled deep in my heart stirring.

Stop it. Don't be happy. Don't show emotion. That's Kalia. Kalia Vadnick. The woman who once trampled me to tyranny and cut off your life as meaningless. A woman who tortures the weak, who is cold-hearted, who doesn't hide her prejudices.

Yes, but... But...

--How can I strangle this feeling that rises from the depths of my heart, this feeling called joy?

But...

It would not be an exaggeration to say that Kalia was using all her strength to suppress her twitching cheeks. She stomped across the floorboards and exited the guild gates.

His chest was heaving, and emotions seemed to be spilling out of the corners of his eyes. The blood flowed through his body from hair to toe as if it had gained great vitality.

"Got it? Oh, yes, this heart has been energized. Too big to burst my chest.

Kalia grits her teeth, thinking she may have never felt anything like this before. Teeth grinding against each other, a pressure that threatened to destroy itself.

Did you see the look on that guy's face? The look on his face when Lugis mentioned the name Alueno.

That's a look he's never shown me before, a look of warmth.

It's a shame. The cats and rats that run around you tremble and make way for you, as if they were touched by the atmosphere and the emotions that Kalia gives off. So do people. No obstacle appears in front of her swaying silver hair.

Many words seemed to overflow from the back of her throat. Biting down on her teeth and closing her lips tightly, Kalia struggled to hold them back. But the rush of emotions would not stop.

--Fine, Lugis. If you want me to, I'll do it now.

But... But... Don't ever think you'll get what you want, Kalia heard her voice say as her emotions trembled. It should have been her own voice, but it sounded like someone else's. It sounded like a demonic voice.

The twitching smile on her face was strangely beautiful.

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