Chapter 6: 6. Animal I Have Become

I made my way back through the tunnels to the dining hall. Once again everyone was there, including Sam, and again, with no space next to him. He looked up at me, then with no emotion back to his dinner. I still didn't want to face him if he was going to be like that, I looked around the room and saw D12 and D42 with a space on D12's side this time so I walked over to them.

Me: "Mind if I join you?" D12 looked up at me,

D12: "Oh hey!, yeah sit." she gestured to the cushion next to her and I took her offer.

Me: "If you don't mind me asking, how are you always so chipper?" She shrugged her shoulders,

D12: "What is there to be upset about?"

Me: "You know we're in a prison right?"

D12: "It's a training facility, and as long as you behave and follow the rules, everything's fine... hey, '42, got a real mood killer here." D42 looked over to me,

D42: "Awww, don't be harsh on her, she's missing her friend." He said to D12

D12: "Oh what, that D03? yeah he's hot."

D42: "Hey!" sounding slightly upset.

D12: "Just saying, the way he spoke to us earlier, made me tingle." almost day dreaming.

D42: "I am right here you know..."

Me: "He spoke to you? D03?" I asked intrigued.   

D42: "Yeah, after he saw you with us this morning he asked how you were and asked us to look after you."

Me: "He did?..." I trailed off, looking over at him, still look at down at his tray and eating in silence, another pang of guilt hit me.

D12: "Do you like him?" She asked me, looking at me looking over at him.

Me: "As a friend yeah, but we had... err... a bit of a fight and I don't think either of us want to talk to the other right now."... D12 forced a smile on,

D12: "Wounds heal, they just take time." She patted me on the back.

I ate my dinner in silence, then it came time to going back to the cells... D42 and D12 headed for the tunnels and D12 turned back to my stationary form and clicked what was going through my mind.

D12: "Ohh shit..."

D42: "What?" turning back himself.

D12: "What about her? Where's she gonna stay?"

D42: "Maybe go she could go make up with D03?..." D12 came and stood by my side,

Me: "No it's fine I'll find somewhere to go" I said.

D12: "Come on, stay with us!"

D42: " '12... only 2 per room, that's the rules." D12 looked at me,

D12: "She's rubbing off on me already, I want to be rebellious for once." grabbing on to my upper arm.

Me: "He is right, I don't want you getting into trouble".

D12: "Please... I'll feel bad." She directed at both me and D42 who just rolled his eyes,

Me: "Seriously I'm fine..." yanking my arm free "...please just,... go. I'll see you tomorrow ok?" I begged her, She looked disappointed and followed D42 up into the tunnels. I hovered outside the tunnels, waiting to be the last one in the room, then went in the tunnels myself, watched everyone filter off into their cells as I made my way through, then walked down a route towards a cell I knew no one had been down to, my restraint was removed at the entrance and I stepped in, silence filled the cell that looked exactly the same as mine and Sam's, but it felt more than empty than usual. I sighed and just headed straight to the bed and settled.

__________

Next day was the rest day, we could do as we please, or so we were told at breakfast by the guards on duty in the dining hall. Apparently there was a training area where we could practice in together, or hang out here, in the dining area, or remain in our 'rooms' with the freedom to switch through out the day. All in all a rather relaxed day could be had indeed, but I chose the first option for the most part. I could hear my old human self now,

'Why would you voluntarily go and do more exercise?' ... 'Because, quite simply, I want out of here, and sitting round doing naff all isn't going to help, might as well prepare myself'... I argued with myself. The training area was pretty quiet, there was only about 4 other dragons in here,... including Bruticus, who either didn't see me, or was more likely probably pretending not to. There was various bits of training equipment in this room, from your standard gym equipment, well, modified for use by dragons, like longer treadmills or larger weight machines for example. Then there was the bit that caught my interest, the testing range. Complete with manikins like yesterday's lessons, although only 4 lanes rather than the 50 odd they had in the main test range.

I chose the left lane against the wall, bounced on the spot as a little warm up and used my tail blades to make sure I remembered how to work them. Once I was psyched up I charged at the manikin, spun and rammed my tail blades through its chest, it wobbled on it's mount but just stood there... I walked back to the start and this time when I ran at it, I used the wall on my left, leaping up and wall running, past the manikin then jumped off the wall behind it and sliced the manikins head off from behind as I leapt passed it's left shoulder and it fell to the floor at the same time I landed. It still just stood there upright,

Me: "Be nice to try this on moving targets." I said and spat a large ball of fire at it which engulfed the manikin, it burned for a few seconds before fire suppressants in the ceiling doused my flames. Once put out, the manikin was withdrawn into the floor and a fresh one took it's place.

Bruticus: "Then why don't you try me?" The deep voice said from behind, I gasped and turned. It was Bruticus... His face was darkened in places, a dragon's version of bruising maybe? Various small cuts here and there on his snout and jaw line from the hits he had sustained from yesterday glowed fresh red still, along with my deep scratches I had made down his cheek, which were now a dull maroon colour. I stepped back away from him slightly,

Me: "Look, I'm sorry about yesterday, I didn't have any choice." I apologised.

Bruticus: "I know, doesn't mean I forgive you though..." I took another step back. "...So how about we make this interesting, One on One, You V Me, no holding back until the other surrenders. You win and I'll never bother you again, I win and your ass is mine." he said with a wink.

Me: "Eww..." I stepped around him, "...I'm not fighting you Bruticus."

Bruticus: "What did you call me?!" he demanded sounding very angry indeed... 'ahh shit... that slipped out'... He grabbed my tail like yesterday, but I was prepared this time, I sprung my blades, cutting his hand and wrist.

Bruticus: "ARGGHHH!" He screamed holding his hand, blood already pouring out of the new wound. He saw red and went to wallop me, almost made contact too but I just about dodged it. However I wasn't expecting his immediate opposite swing which caught me square in the side of the head on my temple, sending me crashing to the floor. He stepped toward me, picked me up by my wing restraint and threw me at the wall, head first, the massive thud echoed through my skull as I collided and slid down in a heap at the bottom of the wall. I turned around dazed to see him lunge his tail blades at me, I rolled out the way just in time and he wedged his blades in the wall.

He growled in annoyance as he tried to pull his tail out, not noticing me get up, trying to hold my balance as I did so and I swung my tail at him, smacking him in the ribs sending, him across the room into the weights area where 3 other dragons had just vacated and stared on in disbelief of the scene unfolding in front of them. I wobbled on the spot, my head was throbbing from him his punch to it and making contact with the wall. He wheezed as he pulled himself up, thick blood pouring from his mouth as he rolled over and started getting up,

Me: "Stay down." I said weakly.

Skylen: "I agree, probably best..." Another deep voice said, I turned to see Skylen stood at the Human's double door entrance to the room, stood tall on his hind legs, arms folded across his chest, some guards burst in behind him, taser batons at the ready. "...HOLD!..." he barked at them, scaring most of them as they went to go around him but they stopped in their tracks and looked at him "...these 2 have issues that need resolving, let them hash it out." the guards partially lowered their batons.

Me: "But I don't want to fight him!" I panted out.

Skylen: "Looks like you haven't got a choice." Skylen replied motioning back towards Bruticus who was making a pained charge at me.

I growled a sigh of annoyance as I braced myself again for another bout, he swung, I ducked, he swung the opposite hand again and I blocked in anticipation this time. He was getting slow, either from exhaustion or pain, so I used his stunned moment to punch him in the neck, he choked on the air but swung his body around, smacking his hefty tail across my face and it was my turn to be sent flying, into the manikins on the test range.

Bruticus stepped menacingly toward me as I pulled myself up, shaking my aching head, again he swung his tail blades at me, downwards this time as if it were an axe, I rolled, he missed and he hit the floor where I had just laid. I had to roll again, past a manikin, as swung again horizontally this time towards me, I kicked the manikin hard off it's mount at him, he smashed it to pieces as reached him with ease, but it still distracted and stunned him enough to allow me to spin myself at ground level and use my tail to whip his legs out from under him, bringing him crashing to the floor onto some of the manikin pieces.

He roared the most ear spitting pain filled roar I had heard so far and he just laid there with laboured wheezing breaths, I stood up on my hind legs and held my tail blades against his neck as he slowly rolled onto his back, revealing one of the manikin assembly rods deeply imbedded in his side. I looked from the rod to his face, pain and fatigue written all over it.

There was a slow clap from over the room, I looked up to see it was Skylen,

Skylen: "Finish him then." he said, I looked back to Bruticus to keep an eye on him.

Me: "Will anyone else understand me besides us dragons?" I asked.

Skylen: "No... why?"

Me: "Does any result of what happens next change option 2?" I asked, hoping he understood my reference to yesterday's conversation. Skylen paused, clearly thinking about the answer to my question.

Skylen: "No... option 2 stays unchanged,..." he hinted back, "...but my opinion of you might differ, depending on the outcome." I looked into Bruticus's eyes, as much as I wanted to do it, as much as he was becoming a pain in my ass, this wasn't me... I growled as I withdrew my blades and unsteadily walked away towards Skylen and stared at him.

Skylen: "I'm both impressed and disappointed..." he said to me "...but remember what I said to you last thing yesterday." I nodded in understanding his reference to the 'No help' thing and he nodded back, before turning to the guards.

Skylen: "Do what you will with them, BUT!... don't harm her, I'm sure she'll come quietly." He said defending me, nodding at me again, I laid down of the floor and placed my hands on my head to signify my surrender, Skylen smiled, turned and left the room as the guards surrounded me and no doubt Bruticus further behind me, more guards bringing in 2 black hexagonal pods on dollies with them.

"Stand up real slow!" a guard shouted at me and they opened the pod next to me.

__________

Once again I was dropped into the glass cell, Dr Paul sat there leant back in his chair, jiggling his leg in an agitated way and sighed before talking to me.

Paul: "Ok... I'm done beating around the bush, What are you doing D-two four? you're running amuck in here, you're causing trouble near enough daily, I mean, what is it? What's your problem?"

Me: "Did you check your footage? I know you have cctv in each room. You'll see he started it!"

Paul: "It doesn't matter who- grrr, this isn't some scouts club or the brownies, I don't want to hear 'He did this, she did that', you didn't have to fight him, you could have just walked away, this is serious and you are acting like it's a game."

Me: "I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and for the record, I did try to leave, but Bru... that male has it in for me. I was all set to walk out when Skylen ordered us to continue so maybe you should talk to him!"

Paul: "Skylen doesn't answer to anyone here, nor is he technically in charge of this operation. While not in an actual training session, you don't have to follow through with his command."

Me: "Oh really, have you ever said no to him?..." Dr Paul stayed silent "...Thought so..." I said, sitting back.

Me: "We have a 3 strike system here D-two four, attacking team mates is a big no no, D-five zero has sustained some serious injuries by you hand, 3 broken ribs, 4 fractured, a punctured lung, and internal bleed we only just managed to stop, fractured jaw, torn tendons on his tail blades, not to mention all the superficial damage. And you, you've come out relatively unscathed. Your hard work of removing your first strike the other day? Undone, just like that, I had hoped that that warning would have been the eye opener you needed to-"

Me: "Are we done here?" I asked impatiently. Dr Paul stayed silent now, slightly shaking his head in annoyance,

Paul: "Yeah, we're done."

Me: "Just send me back to my cell already then..."

__________

I felt the pod lower, the doors clicked under my feet and leapt out, landing in the main room of the cell, watched as the pod retreated through the roof, as like anywhere else, allowing no chance of escape. I stepped up to the window,

'Good, I'm down the line of cells enough, this isn't Sam's cell.' I thought to myself.

I spent a long time lying in bed that night looking up at the detail-less ceiling, trying to ignore the aches and pains of my recent fight, thinking about Kayley, more than I have done and certainly more than I should have done since getting in here, a nagging thought crossed my mind, 'How long had I actually been here? If I was to guess I'd say nearly a week, but I don't know how long it took to... I don't know what's the best phrase to use...

 'Convert'? my body. A day? A week? A month? Shit... What if it was more? What if I had taken years? Where would Kayley be now? Did she move on? Did she mourn?' these questions plagued my mind for hours, causing my eyes to start tearing up on several occasions. I rolled onto my side to try and get comfy, I felt so alone, more so than last night. 'Was I to die here? Is this a punishment? Had I done wrong? And if so, what?' soo many questions plaguing my mind, it was a miracle that I ever got to sleep.

The rest of the week dragged terribly and I did my utmost to keep my head down and behave, which for most part surprisingly worked. By the fourth day of training, all of the other dragons, including Sam, D12 and D42 had caught up and joined the offense and defence training with Skylen still teaching, those of us who had completed scenario 3 on the second day, had it pretty easy for the rest of the week, being allowed to take turns and practice moves further down the range from the rest of the group. The only one I didn't see present all this time was Bruticus.

You are reading story Alex – Heart Of The Vanguard at novel35.com

Training day 5 was exactly the same and for the second rest day of the week, I thought it was best to hide in my cell for the day to avoid trouble which worked nicely in actual fact, even though I was as bored as hell. I had even managed to avoid Sam all that time as well, right up until the first morning of week 2... on my way to breakfast I walked along the tunnel head held low, just following the tail of the dragon in front when my head hit something solid.

Me: "Oww"... I grabbed the spot I hit it and looked up to see what I walked into, or rather, who, it seems... Sam was there, at the junction from his cell, rubbing his head too,

Sam: "Oh... hey..." He said with a hint of a smile, 

Me: "Erm... hey." I tried to sound a bit more enthusiastic than I felt, but it didn't really work.

Sam: "Listen... I erm... I wanted to... can we talk? Over breakfast maybe?"

Me: "Or you could just say what you got to say now?" I said unintentionally coldly.

Sam: "Well I would, but you're kinda holding up the queue." he gestured behind me, looking around, sure enough there some rather unhappy looking Dragons waiting behind me.

Me: "Oh shit, sorry..." I said back to them, "...come on then." I said reluctantly to him.

We took the 2 left seats at the table, he on the outside, before either of us said anything I heard a familiar chirpy voice.

D12: "Hey! These seat taken?", I turned to look to confirm, it was D12 and D42.

Me: "Knock yourself out." I gestured to them.

D12: "So you 2 sorted it out then?" she said excitedly.

Me: "Not yet,..." I turned to Sam "...but maybe we're about to?" I said hinting to him, he pulled an awkward face.

D42: "Oh... we can leave if you want space." seeing our exchange of looks.

Me: "Unless you feel awkward, but you can stay if you want." D42 went to get up but D12 grabbed his arm,

D12: "We're staying... in case they need us." and he sat back down. I turned back to Sam in way of telling him to go ahead.

Sam: "I am sorry, about the way I acted, I just feel really pent up... guess I just wanted to cling to the only thing I felt any sort of attachment for... but I should have respected your choice. And you're right, if you remember and want to return to your past self Alex, then I shouldn't turn down a friend in need, if you still want help that is?" he said with a smile, I was unknowingly smiling as well, his apology made me all mushy inside... 'fucking female emotions' I also thought, I was about to apologise myself when I was interrupted.

D12: "Wait, what did you call her? 'Alex'? And what are you on about her past and memories?" both our smiles instantly faded.

Sam: "You haven't told them?"

Me: "You were the only one who believed me from the off, they didn't, so I didn't say anymore to them."

D42: "Tell us what? What are you on about? You can remember before the explosion? Tell us."

Me: "Do I tell them?"

Sam: "I don't know to be honest." he said shrugging his shoulders.

D12: "How about this, you tell us, or we tell the scientists, because I'm willing to bet you haven't updated them." She said, sounding rather serious for a change, Sam shrugged his shoulders at me again. I sighed as I picked up some food and started eating,

My: "My name, my REAL name, is Alex Crawford... And there was no explosion..." I recited my story to them and they listened intently stopping only every so often to take another mouthful, "...And Sam here can remember his name and that's about it." I finished, Sam nodding to confirm.

D42: "If what you're saying is true and we all have memory blocks in place then why can you remember everything and we can't remember a thing?"

Me: "I don't know, fluke maybe? An accident?"

Sam: "Maybe it has something to do with that device on your back." I turned around to him confused.

Me: "What device?" Sam stopped chewing and looked bewildered at me,

Sam: "You mean you don't know?"

Me: "What device?" I repeated myself, now trying to look over my back, it was certainly easier than trying to look over you own back as a Human, but I still couldn't see anything.

Sam: "You can see it right now, it's covered by the wing restraint, but I've seen it in the cell, gloss black, diamond shape, buried in your back, right on your spine and between your wings... You seriously never felt or seen it before?"

Me: "No! Why didn't you say anything before now?"

Sam: "I thought you knew!"

The claxon sounded indicating end of breakfast, all 4 of us had been so distracted by talking that none of us had finished, I scoffed a last mouthful and we headed for the tunnels.

Coming out of the tunnels we entered the scenario room again with the many doors and we lined up with the rest, all 4 of us next to one another.

D42: "Jesus Christ, what happened to him?!" We all followed D42's line of sight and were met with Bruticus feebly walking and joining the line further down, wearing multiple bandages, a brace around his jaw and what looked like almost a corset around his chest area, but not the female under garnment type, this was more medical grade 'stop you breaking something you shouldn't' type of deal.

D12: "I heard one our group kicked his ass in the recreational training room a few days ago."

Me: "Oh... oops." I said turning back to face front, the other 3 all looked at me.

Sam: "What do you mean 'oops'? You did that?!" I gave a little embarrassed nod.

D42: "And you haven't got a mark on you!"

D12: "Ooo Sam, I'd go careful in the bedroom then if I were you, you might not come out alive if you do the dirty on her." My head snapped a disapproving look at her but before I could say anything the Drill Sargent spoke up.

Drill Sergeant: "Welcome to week 2 you horrible lot... Solo training, behind these doors are scenarios much like Scenario 3 you all passed last week. At this stage, these are not tests... they are training simulations, you will be shown and instructed on manoeuvres, moves, plans and strategies you can employ if and when you find yourself running solo ops. You will be informed of your objective at the start of each area... so... get moving". We all moved up and picked a door and entered the dark rooms, doors slamming shut behind us.

"Loading Scenario." A robotic male voice said on loud speaker. My eyes were trying to adjust, it felt warm and humid in here, the ceiling and walls slowly dimmed into light, imitating a slightly overcast sky which seemed almost too real. More astonishing than that though was the scenario in front of me... Tropical trees and plants were scattered throughout and real roots were raised out of the very real soil beneath my feet, there were vines that linked the fairly densely thick canopy above while background ambience of a jungle was played aloud on the speakers that were hidden who knows where... if I had just woken up here and not knowing where I was previously, I would have definitely said all of this was real, I hadn't even realised my jaw was dropped in awe.

Skiff: "At the end of this scenario is an enemy base of operations, you must proceed through this forest to reach it..." Dr Skiff introduced, I started walking through the badly worn trail between trees. "...In enemy occupied areas, they will likely booby trap routes leading up to their hide outs, mines, trip wires, drones, auto sentries are just some of the examples of things to watch out for." As Dr Skiff's narrated my route, red holograms projected into my path of each object she mentioned as she spoke. "...It may be necessary to use alternative routes, high access such tree lines to avoid such defences..." A blue hologram of a Dragon, or rather a rough outline of one, ran up a tree ahead and waited in the branches above. I copied it and watched as it then leapt from tree to tree with silent grace and again I copied it as it ran on through the branches ahead, I followed until it came to a stop in a tree and I landed and waited next to it. "...Crow's nests and other traps maybe something you find in this kind of scenario..." A hologram of a small wooden structure appeared in red a couple of trees ahead, the dragon hologram crawled low, down the tree, along the ground and slowly up the tree in question containing the 'Crows Nest'. The dragon leapt up and tackled the hologram of the man in the nest and the whole nest fell from the tree, the hologram disintegrating into nothing before it even reached the ground, it was like watching a silent movie. "...Please continue." Skiff's voice said and I carried on hopping through the trees in an attempt to catch the Dragon hologram up.

Up ahead again the hologram halted in a tree where the tree density rapidly thinned out. I landed in the tree next to the hologram and looked out.

Me: "Well if that was an evil lair if I ever did see one." I said to myself. A large concrete structure, looking almost like a bunker with huge blast doors, sat nestled in the hillside with a large flat concrete yard leading up to it.

Skiff: "Before you is the entrance to the enemy bunker. It will likely be heavily guarded with defensive and offensive capabilities such as the following..." Again, items of interest were presented as holograms in red as she listed them, "... Dog units, patrol sentries, sentry turrets, CCTV, audio detection systems, more trip wires, more drones, barbed wire and/or electric fencing and/or high rise walls, with the potential for watch towers with potentially search lights are all types of security you may come across. You will need to use your initiative as although some of these may not be visible it doesn't mean that they're not present."

All the enemy holograms disappeared and my fellow blue hologram leapt down to the empty concreted yard below and then it too faded from existence. I leapt down as well and walked cautiously across the yard, half expecting something to happen, but thankfully nothing did. My blue silhouetted friend returned next to me and bounded ashead of me silently up the side wall of the bunker, opened a hatch on the roof then dived in. I ran and followed it up and tried to open the hatch, but it was locked down tight, then Dr Skiffs voice came on again,

Skiff: "Quite often, the best route is actually not the main route in, whether it be too heavily guarded or a stealth approach is required, for these reasons we suggest you always find an alternate route in. But for this example, please use the main entrance."

Me: "Oh, ok." I replied, giving up my attempts to gain access through this way.

I jumped down from the roof of the bunker and aimed for the main entrance, which opened as I approached, I passed through into another dark room, again the door slamming shut behind me.

"Loading S-S-S-Scenaarrriooo-o-o." The robotic male voice stuttered and died, the lights all flickered on, briefly revealing a hall, then died out, leaving me in darkness again.

Me: "Erm... guys? Your snazzy machine is broken... What the fuck?..." I tried reaching around for light switches or something, anything on the walls, something to give me some light, the lights flickered on again for a brief moment before staying off. "...For fuck sake, at least keep on top of your electric bills.. Wait... ahhh, I see, you're testing me... what the fuck am I doing..." I blew a small amount of flames at the floor just a few feet from me, which illuminated the hall enough for me to look around, but there was nothing here, no switches, nothing. The flames died out as I scanned down the hall, revealing a blue light down further down the hall, which died out after only a couple of seconds.

Me: "What the..." I whispered to myself, I took one step forward, "...ARRGGHHH!" I screamed as explosive static filled the speakers at the same time the blue hologram of the dragon suddenly appeared in right in front of me, lighting up the hall, facing away from me, scaring the crap out of me, then, it vanished again.

"...try again..." I heard a faint male voice say.

Me: "Hello?" I asked out loud, no answer except for the dragon hologram fading into existence again still facing down the hall. I stared at it for a few moments waiting for it to disappear again or move on. But it didn't, but more creepily it's head slowly turned to look over its shoulder to look dead at me, the lack of a face not doing anything to help my level of calmness.

Me: "Okaayyy, not creepy at all..." the whole body then turned to me on the spot then walked towards me, it's outline flickered between blue and red. "...REALLY not creepy... This is just a really bad dream... I'm gonna wake up now!..." I said backing up to the door as it still paced towards me. I turned and started thumping on the door, "...LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT!!!"

"Alex..." A calm voice said, I snapped around to see who called my name, only to see the hologram stood still just a few feet from me.

Me: "Hello?" I said over the hologram expecting someone to jump out any moment.

"Alex, I don't know how long we have before we get knocked out of the system so listen..." The blue hologram's mouth moved unnaturally to the voice that was supposedly emitting from it, like the graphics of a 90's video game, the lack of facial features still not helping flesh this hologram out.

Me: "Who are you?" I asked it.

"No time, just listen. Do not trust Skylen, we saw the footage of you 2 together and the deal he made you, don't worry, no one else at the facility did. I'm here to tell you there's a third option, one that doesn't involve a life of servitude to either Skylen or the company that you're developed by, Sky High Technologies. But we need time and an opportunity to arise to try to get you out, but you need to stay out of trouble." 

'...why does everyone presume I go looking for trouble?...'

Me: "I have friends here... I'm not leaving without them." the hologram paused.

"We can try and get you all out, but you are the priority so we make no promises."

Me: "Who is "WE"?"

"We don't have time, systems there are already rebooting, if you agree to our offer you need to say yes now!" 'I hate on the spot decisions... they can try and save all 4 of us, Me, Sam, D12 and D42... but if they can't then it's just me and even then, that's not guaranteed... they won't forgive me... and I won't forgive myself...

"ALEX YES OR NO?!"

Me: "YES! YES!, I'LL TAKE IT!..." I shouted back as the hologram faded out. Staring at the spot where it just stood... 'I hope he heard my answer'... "...Forgive me Sam" I slumped to the floor as the robotic male voice returned and the hall illuminated and filled with light,

"Loading Scenario."

I wasn't even sure why I accepted... I mean, yeah, it would be great to get home, to Kayley, to be a Human guy too, to get my life back... But my conscious was getting the better of me. How many others in here were just plain innocent like me?, mindlessly doing as they were told, including Sam, D42 and D12, and I'd be leaving them all to that fate.

Me: "If I get out... I'll come back for you Sam... I promise..." tears started rolling down my cheeks as my guilt ate away at me again, especially after his heartfelt apology this morning... 'I didn't even return an apology'... "...what kind of monster am I?"

(-Three Days Grace)

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