Chapter 14: A Growing Fear

Aster tried not to fidget. She knew she held her poise better than most, but she felt like she was going to fidget a hole in the floor. Solomon came out of the dockmaster’s office with a smile that relieved her. 

“Aster,” he said, “were you coming to see me?” 

“I wanted to check on the shadow children. But seeing you is always nice, Sol.” 

“Likewise. I’ve missed all of you awfully over the years. You’ll be able to visit them in their own habitat this evening.” 

“Oh good! Will they have access to the rest of Albion?” 

“Limited, at first. The Quorum hasn’t said so openly, but they’re going to develop a way to surveil them before they let them roam free.” 

Aster nodded. “I can’t blame them. What are you doing right now? Do you have a few minutes to talk?” 

“About Cat’s misgivings?” 

“In general. I tend to get left out of a lot of important conversations.” 

He made a gesture towards the hall outside. “Walk with me.” 

The causeway from the starboard hangar to the assembly hall was long and straight, passing through many plazas and intersecting with hundreds of other throughfares. People milled about, mostly human, with the occasional exo. Of their own kind, there were few, and they drew more than a few looks as they walked. Even in minimal harness and no armor, the Harbingers were strange as they walked among the humanity they resembled. Beyond their glowing eyes and wind walking stride, there was their war weary bearing, and the elaborate clothing they all were drawn to. In one of her death dreams, Aster saw men of war in days long gone. They were heraldic knights, men of high birth and education, granted land and wealth, and were by virtue of arms and training an echelon above any other fighter of their day. Ru had a similar dream once, of another part of old Earth, where samurai were granted a similar high status. These dreams gave her a certain patience, if not understanding, for the separateness of her people. 

Unsure what to say to start her conversation with Solomon, she mentioned her dreams of knights, and asked him what old world warriors he dreamed of. 

“The Immortals,” he answered. 

“Immortals?” Aster asked, her attention perked. 

“Not literally. They were savage fighters, from what I saw.” 

“Have you ever wondered why we only dream of violence?” 

He shrugged. “They are death dreams. Mine are mostly about being a victim of some awful crime.” 

“That’s horrible.” 

“Death has consequences. Even for the deathless. So, what have you been uo to since I left?” 

She was quiet for a moment, choosing what to use her limited time saying. “I spin up with the team, and I try to find ways of expanding myself.” 

“Worthy actions and worthy goals. How do you aim to expand yourself, exactly?” 

“I want to be more than a war fighter. There has to be more that radiance can be used for.” 

“Most assuredly. What do you want to do with yours?” 

“I want to feel what I see. Like, I want to be connected to everything, so I can understand the world around me on a more caring level.” 

“A precious sentiment, Aster. Never let it go. It can be achieved, mind you. I’ve learned to bend my own light in many different directions. But if course, I’ve had more time than you, and I was risen when there was still peace. I feel for you younger ones. You are limited by necessity.” 

They stopped and backed away as an entourage of golganoogs filed by. Aster smiled at the small people in their dark robes. She loved their high voices and the way they shuffled. Once she got accustomed to their spiderlike faces, she grew to welcome their company. The exo delegates passed, and they resumed their walk. 

“What sorts of things have you learned to do?” she asked. 

“Actually, I’ve accomplished something very similar to your goal. It’s not a passive state, like you described, but I can direct my thought past a number of veils, feeling the fibers moving within. Sometimes, when my mind is quiet, I can hear music.” 

“That’s beautiful. I wish I had more time, like you said.” 

He put a hand on her shoulder. “Let nothing stop you from realizing your truth, Aster. To be completely honest, I found help. The shadow children are valuable companions. They come from the other side, and what each of us has seen can help the other.” 

She pondered over his words for a moment, then turned to pleasant talk, missing her kind old teacher and unable to shake the feeling she was going to lose him again. When they were near the assembly hall, she asked him if she should take Cat’s warning seriously. 

“Well,” he said, “he got it from me.” 

He hugged her gently before leaving. 

She lingered on the causeway for a time, watching the endo and exo civilians of Albion. The occasional visitor wandered by, searching for a purpose or something to occupy their minds. That was the primary difference between the two groups. That and visitors were few, especially since Albion embarked on its journey. Aster found herself curious about the travelers that she did spot, wondering where they rendezvoused at, where they came from, and what their motives for coming to Albion were. She could imagine so many, especially this far from habitable space. The longer she loitered the more she wanted to ask them if they came to Albion for food, protection, or for company, or were merely hitching a ride and saving their own vessel’s resources. 

She shook herself loose of her thoughts, then went back to the armory, making conversation with other Harbingers who were coming back from their maneuvers. Everyone wanted to hear about Reev and Ru first, and most people only asked about Solomon when Aster tried explaining how Reev and Ru weren’t going to come back as Anunnaki. 

“How does Solomon know these things?” they’d ask. “Did it happen to him?” 
To these questions she would say, “He’s been gone too long to catch us up in so short a time,” and “He was always one of the strongest and the wisest of us,”. But the questions were unending, so she politely excused herself and went to their dorm. The others were all waiting. 

“I’m sorry I doubted you,” she said to Cat as soon as she sat down. 

“I doubt everything at the moment,” he said. Then, “No need to apologize. I’m not certain how much credit we can give even Solomon right now.” 

“Then let’s deal with what we know,” said Eukary. 

“Okay,” said Ishtar, mockingly. “And what’s that, exactly? We’re trusting Sol that Ru and Reev aren’t dead. We’re trusting the Quorum to have Albion’s best interests at heart, and we’re trusting Cap to take power from them for the best interests of Albion.” 

“Maybe there’s a better way to structure the picture,” said Cat. 

Ishtar rolled her eyes, then sighed. “Sorry.” 

“I don’t blame you,” said Cat. “We all have reasons to be suspicious, upset and confused. But let’s make sense of everything.” 

Forge was in the lounge pouring tea. He handed everyone a mug and they all gathered round the card table. 

“Allright, Cat,” Forge said after taking a sip, “what do you know that we don’t?” 

Aster sipped her tea. Forge made it well. The herbs gave her images of a still lake within mountains. She shivered from the cold air she saw. 

Catalyst warmed his throat with tea before beginning. “There’s been talk of restructuring government since Albion left Confederated space. The Quorum was designed to be flexible, to allow for a lasting form of governance to take shape over time. Between skirmishes with exos, labor crises and economic collapse, the civilian sector has been under too much turmoil to do anything other than limp along with what they had. When our numbers began increasing, many thought that would give Albion a chance to catch its breath. But our section chiefs were focused on Imogen’s parting words, and ignored the needs of the civilians. The human military proved unequal to many of the threats Albion faced in deep space, so the Quorum insisted on having a measure of direction over Harbinger operations. We were all risen after that system was enacted, so we haven’t questioned it. But the truth is, it’s as new as we are, and was never meant to last.” 

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“I’ve heard different versions of this,” said Eukary. 

“Me too,” said Forge. “But it all adds up. We haven’t had time to hash out a better hierarchy, but until we do Albion will be plagued with serious problems.” 

“We’ve kept the lights on, at least,” Aster said, wanting to brighten the room. 

“And we’ve barely any crime,” Ishtar added. “But I’m worried our status quo won’t last through a real crisis. And a real crisis is exactly what we’re facing.” 

“It seems Sol came back at the right time,” said Euk. 

“How do you figure that?” asked Forge, leaning forward. 

“Think about it. When Sol left, the other section chiefs became isolated. They stopped working towards any focused goals and got lost in their own research. Solomon kept them united, and he kept us focused on worthwhile pursuits. Everything we know about radiance we learned when the section chiefs were working together.” 

Forge folded his hands together and nodded. “It’s true. All the ways we augment our munitions and propulsion, the improvements to our harnesses and integrating them into our armor and weapons systems. There haven’t been any major advancements since Sol left.” 

“Let’s not forget Eno,” said Cat. 

There was a moment of silence. 

“How could we forget Eno?” said Aster. 

“Reev spent more time with her than anyone,” said Forge. 

Aster always wondered why Revol spent so many long sessions in Oak, even though the old machine never revealed any new information. She took it as his way of missing Solomon, as Eno’s full capacity would have gone unnoticed were it not for him. 

“Kali found her, on an op that Sol pushed through.” Aster finished her tea. “You’re right, Euk. He came back just in time.” 

“And the Quorum wanted us to hand him over to them,” said Catalyst, “so they could lock him up. They were tracking and spying on him with Needle. They’ve planted spies in nearly every high tier attack group. And they’re actively trying to manipulate us. I’d love to just chock it all up to them being afraid, but their actions are too deliberate.” 

“So, where’s Cap in all this?” Eukary asked.  

“He’s putting the new government together.” 

“And how’s that shaping up?” asked Forge. 

Cat held out his empty mug. Forge grabbed the kettle and refilled it. “There will be an officially recognized governing body over all military action, run exclusively by Harbingers.” 

Aster raised her eyebrows. “And this is ratified?” 

“There was a clause hidden in the Pathfinder Charter.” Cat seemed almost smug. “One of Imogen’s parting gifts.” 

“Who’s gonna be in this elite group?” asked Ishtar. 

“That’s the best part,” Cat said. “Solomon insisted the old section chiefs remain in place. There will be a selection from the team captains. According to Sol, ours is going to be at the head.” 

Forge laughed as stood, getting a smile from Aster. “You look excited,” she said. 

He clapped his hands. “This is the first thing Sol’s done since he came back that doesn’t give me the jibblies.” 

“You feel better with him opting out of rule?” Cat asked, eyeing Forge carefully. 

“He’s been gone too long,” said Forge, “there’s no way he’d be accepted. But if he had his old buddies running the show, then I’d be nervous.” 

“You find it less worrisome that he’s putting his premier protégé in charge?” Cat held Forge’s gaze. “Someone who looks up to him, rather than the people who used to keep him in check?” 

“You don’t trust him then?” Forge looked confused. 

“I do. But we need to be sharp, Forge. All of us.” 

Forge nodded and sat back down. 

Cat’s next words were the money shot. 

“We’re spinning up tomorrow.” 

“Just us five?” asked Euk. 

“Just us five.” 

“What are we doing?” asked Ishtar. 

“Securing supplies and competent refugees.” 

“You’ve gotta be kidding,” said Ishtar.  

“So now they’re keeping us busy with rookie work,” said Euk. 

“This is combat group work,” said Forge. “I’d be suspicious of any Harbinger team being sent on an op like this.” 

“Let me guess,” said Aster, herself very incensed, “they’re sending us because we’re below capacity?” 

“That’s the reason they professed.” Cat was calm, which helped Aster feel slightly less worried. 

“And we’re sure this is the Quorum’s doing?” Aster asked. “Wouldn’t Sol or Cap fight this?” 

“If they felt it necessary.” 

“So, we play along and watch our backs?” asked Euk. 

“For now,” said Cat. “It’s like the captain said. We need to trust each other, even more than usual.”  

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