I’ve been with my Big Sister for as long as I could remember.
When I think about it now, I think we used to live in a pretty rundown house.
I have no memory of our parents. Did they give birth to me and leave or did they die? I couldn’t afford to think about it, so I didn’t care too much.
It was more important to figure out how to survive tomorrow and today, than something like that.
My Big Sister was very concerned about me and I was the priority when it came to food. At the time, I didn’t think about where it came from and just kept eating whatever is served in front of me.
Even then, after some years when I saw my Big Sister coming home every day, I felt like things shouldn’t have continued as they were.
I should help, too.
How old am I? I remember saying that.
My Big Sister didn’t expect those words from my mouth, hers hung open for a moment in shock, but the next moment she told me in a gentle tone not to overdo it.
It was unusual for me to rebel against my sister if not outright impossible, and I didn’t argue with her, but I think it was a little mean of her to keep me from helping just like that.
In the end, I convinced my Big Sister and started to take on various chores, being paid under the table
After that, the days went as usual. We’re used every day until we’re exhausted, and you only get some money or a supply of in-kind food, whether it was a day’s worth or not.
We did everything from sewage cleaning to weeding and taking care of pets. Some of the really rare jobs gave us a little extra because we were kids, but they were far and few in between.
However, I wasn’t satisfied but neither was I desperate. I was able to live for that day, and when I got home, I had my Big Sister, and if I had my Big Sister, I could go on.
At the beginning, I and Big Sister worked together, but after a while, we decided to take different jobs.
Contrary to Big Sister’s expression, I think it was around this time that the quality of food I got every day gradually began to improve.
“You don’t have to worry about anything, Miu.”
It was the sort of cliché I’d heard since I was little but it was even more frequent then.
When I think about it now, I think it was a word of comfort and atonement for me, but in the end, I couldn’t grasp the true meaning of it, and never got it.
“This the place? I heard they live in a pretty rundown house.”
It was one day.
When I finished my work earlier and was waiting for Big Sister to return, it was a man, not her, that came.
“Oh, there we go. Hey, are you Miu?”
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Yeah, it was so easy to say yes. The man was a little big but I’ve dealt with big men with bad intentions plenty of times.
“It’s about your sister… I’m sorry, she’s dead.”
The man sounded like he didn’t feel sorry for me at all.
Why? How? Where? When? Various questions ran through my brain but the words never got out.
“Here, do you recognize this?”
The man threw me something as my mind was elsewhere, I was stunned and silent. I reflexively caught it thanks to the light shining through the open door.
It was the pendant that Big Sister always wore.
Seeing it, I vaguely felt, “I’ll never see my Big Sister anymore.” I didn’t give up then but the feelings of despair were still swirling inside me.
“I’ve been asked to take care of you. That’s why I’m here.”
The man spun the rest of his story with some annoyance.
I couldn’t trust him. I couldn’t do it, but to be honest, I don’t know what to do now that I’ve been faced with the fact that my Big Sister is gone. My thoughts went round and round, never reaching a conclusion in my head.
“If you want to bring your family back to life, you’ll come with me,” he said. “What? I’m not going to kidnap and eat you, you know.”
An unexpected choice presented itself.
I don’t know why I chose it, and why they were offering it. I couldn’t think of anything as such a young child.
After that, I was able to wash my hands of the dirty and terrible work like sewage cleaning and weeding. Instead, my work now was dirty in a different sense.
Of course, I didn’t like it at first. However, once I got the hang of it, it seemed I managed to keep up the momentum. Although it was a crime, it was much easier to get a lot of money than to work dirty jobs.
“Come on, take this.”
One day, an accessory was thrown at me like my sister’s pendant then.
From what I was told, it seemed to be a magical device. It seems to be able to temporarily produce a spell. Apparently, I was worth caring more than the bare minimum.
Whatever you say, I was indebted to them so many times. Mainly when I was about to get caught.
Living every day was a desperate struggle. I could have imagined that if I was arrested now, my future would be dark.
However, I’m not doing this for myself.
This is all to revive my sister.
I was prepared to do anything for that.
The man first said that it would cost a lot of money.
When I asked how much exactly, he reluctantly said it was 5 million dalc and could not go down.
5,000,000 dalc. It’s a lot of money.
But if it’s for Big Sister, I’d get it. Collect it and show it. I thought I could cross a somewhat more dangerous bridge. I got used to my work and thought that I wouldn’t be caught quickly if I had that magical equipment.
However, I stopped using it.
Before I knew it, I was able to shoot flames to drive off my pursuers.
At first, I thought that the magical equipment had gone haywire. But how do I say it, I got the trick? After repeating it over and over again, I somehow learned how to shoot flames.
I wasn’t happy about it. It was originally produced by using magical equipment and I didn’t think I could use this to feed myself.
For the moment, I reported it to the man who took me in. Well, the reaction wasn’t flattering.
Was it because I could shoot flames? That’s what I thought.
I can’t bring Big Sister back to life with fire. It was a little more convenient for me but nothing more.
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Anyway, save 5 million dalc. This is one of the ways to do that.
My purpose would be shaken by nothing.
So, I’m going to do today what I always did.
“–I don’t find that impressive, you know?”
Surprise. Or rather, I was surprised.
Until now, I’ve been chased after a successful pickpocket but I’ve never been caught and stopped before I got the goods.
“… Tch!”
I focus my mind on my grabbed arm and create a flame. He seemed to be proud he didn’t panic.
I managed to escape, but after returning to the safe house, I realized something important had disappeared.
“By any chance, are you looking for a pendant?”
It was the next day. When I was looking for the lost item at the last place I had it, I came across Pops from last night. I wanted to avoid him but it was useless as he seemed to remember me. Damn it.
After that, I had no choice but to follow Pops, and for some reason, I was taken to the Knight’s HQ, sat down then asked questions, and suddenly some ridiculous kid popped up. It was a busy day, competing for #1 or #2 in my short life.
I also learned that my goal was for nothing.
I wanted to think it was a lie. So what have I been doing all this so far?
I’m exhausted.
I wasn’t motivated and I had no energy nor reason to go against the adult’s words.
But:
Though I was exhausted, there was something warm.
I don’t know what that was.
“Above all else, we can’t overlook the fact that a young girl like you is in distress. We don’t know if we can be allies. But at the very least, we’re not enemies.”
There was the Knight-Captain who was rumored to be so noble, probably the opposite of me.
“You have to retain your dignity, Candidate, and the dignity of your big sister. And you’re the only one who can protect both.”
And there was the Head of the Magic Division, who seemed younger than me.
“I’ll have you stick with me for a little while longer. I have a feeling I can help you.”
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And there was Pops, who at first glance looked unreliable but was insanely strong.
He was different from the adults I’ve seen so far.
I’m worried about Big Sister. It’s little wonder: I haven’t seen her die nor have I seen her corpse. I just heard it from that man’s mouth.
But, there’s nothing I can do about it. I’m weak. If I had the option of believing in the words of an adult and making an honest living, please let me know.
“I don’t know what I should do from now on…”
I muttered those words after it was all over.
“Well, I’ll do something about it. That’s the responsibility of adults.”
In the end, it was Pops who replied to my words.
How about some credit? I don’t think it’s undeserved. At the very least, he feels different from the nasty adults I’ve met so far.
If I think about it, he’s a pretty friendly guy. Originally, I was trying to relieve him of his wallet, but he’s trying to take care of me because of that.
He’s not doing anything to upset me. But, how to deal with him was a little too difficult with my little knowledge and experience.
… Well, it’s also true that I can’t do anything but follow what the adults say.
Then, I think it’s okay to trust these people at least once.
“See you later, Miu.”
It was after returning from the hideout.
The voice behind me was terribly gentle.
He was very kind, but a little unreliable.
“… Hmph.”
Big Brother, he’s a little too old to be that.
If I had a father, he might have been like this.
“Come on, with me, Miu.”
When I was about to indulge in that little fantasy in my head, my arm was pulled and I went back to reality.
This bitch, on the other hand, is a fucking bratty little sister!
I don’t want to imagine that we’re even related by blood!
… But.
Even if I had to leave my Big Sister behind.
It was such a day that I felt like I was able to look forward to tomorrow, if only a little.