Chapter 12: Ch 12 – Gruel

I’d spent the better part of a month eating barbecue. It wasn’t as though I hadn’t gotten a little tired of it. The simple truth was that I knew practically nothing of cooking, or plants. If there was something floating around in my head, it was something about frozen food and room service. There was no hope there. No one was freezing my food, and the only service I had was small game delivery. So I’d tried to learn some things from the goblin woman who had known a bit more, but goblin diets as they were basically raw meat. Besides it wasn’t like they had spices or even salt.

All this was to say, that as I stared down at what I could only assume was boiled wood chips I wanted nothing more then to go back to eating barbecue. In fact if the some random god or goddess would at this very moment come down and teleport me away, I’d swear to never complain about my barbecue situation ever again!

Minutes past, and nothing. My guess? I had no such divine affinity after all.

“You get used to it.” Kay offered.

“Kay always looks on the bright side of things.” Joan said with a goofy grin.

If I recalled right this was the fourth bowl of depression I’d consumed so far. Best to think about something else…

I’d spoken to them about the tribe a bit in the mean time, I’d learned a little. Such as how the bonding ritual was basically a marriage of sorts. I also learned that it was done when the woman went into heat. Beast kin might actually be weird… Each woman as it turned out had their own month, or roughly that, Kay had described things in lunar cycles and they had a calendar. I’d lost a good amount of the details in the explanation. But the basics were easy, you were expected to get hitched, go hang out on a mountain top and fuck until you got pregnant. Or at least that was my take away, Kay made it sound like a holy rite with vast historical and traditional importance. Sounded like bullshit to me, but what did I know?

In truth that was just how they did things, then again it made me start to question my own body more. If I’d been in heat two months ago, and I’d been with the goblins for maybe a bit over a month now, had the reason I been so horny around that elf just because of that? Or was that after I was in heat? Probably after right?

But if that was the case why was I getting excited around the guy that threw me in here the first day? As usual, I had no answers and it was all just annoying. I wish I had some mature experimental aunt figure to talk to me about this stuff instead of a younger sister and her love bird. I put in far to much effort to try and at least not say strange things. It was hard, I’d spent a month fucking goblins in a cave for crying out loud, I was obviously pushing degeneracy to a new standard purely based on circumstance. But these people didn’t need to know any of that, plus It wasn’t like I enjoyed it either! I’m not bitter!

That wasn’t all I learned either. They talked about how the tribe was structured a little, some of what people did, they tried to describe where the tribe was. Other things too, some of it I just humored them and half listened other parts I actually kind of wanted to know. I probably should have paid rapt attention to each and everything, but there was only so much I could take before my eyes glazed over and I wanted to gnaw my own leg off. I’m kidding, mostly.

But it was hard for Kay to stay excited about talking about their family or tribe for long when I seemed so clearly disconnected from them. Usually when Kay went quite Joan would try to keep the conversation going. But eventually he’d just meander to a stop.

I had to describe my own situation a few times, each time I tried to add a little bit extra detail while keeping with my original plan. I had to give up that someone else was helping me, otherwise I’d have to admit to hunting, something that I simply didn’t know how to do. Though in truth I never did ask how that worked in the tiger kin tribe. I decided to not risk stepping on societal landmines for the time being.

So while I avoided talking about the goblins it made the conversations obviously awkward. Kay had just taken to calling them my “friend.” I wonder what they would think if they learned my “friend” was ten goblins and a sentient cave? I couldn’t help but think that this world was odd at times, yet all the same I got a kick out of that, like it was my own personal joke.

I was growing restless for certain. I spent a decent chunk of the two nights wondering what was happening else where. If Scout had gone back to the cave. If the dungeon had already forsaken me for my willfulness and indiscretion.

Maybe they would come kill us in the next few days. It hadn’t been long, but this second chance wasn’t all bad, but it was hard to say it was great, or even good either. I couldn’t help but lay there next the two other tiger kin looking up at the soft glow of the moon though the tiny triangle like opening in the walls and want to escape, to do more, to go further.

It wasn’t as though I hadn’t tried to escape. The shackle they had placed around our ankles were surprisingly tight, and the pole was firmly in place, and not about to go anywhere. I was at least thankful for the fact that I wasn’t particularly attracted to Joan. Whatever reason was behind that. Especially since he was sleeping within arms’ reach. Maybe it was the strange connection I was feeling growing between me and Kay? Some sort of sisterly thing? Maybe not… I just found myself not thinking about him in general. Maybe it was the youth I couldn’t help but see in him? It was probably for the best. My fantasies were focused on larger things…. Not just dicks! That didn’t hurt, but a man was more then just a conveniently shaped pole. I liked big hands wrapping me up or squeezing me… I liked their intensity too. I wanted to be wrapped up by strong arms and kissed, to feel them explore my entire body… Why was I thinking about this again!?

Pushing that aside… What to do though? Just wait around, or give up? I hated those options. I’d much rather do something.

So I waited for same man who always gave us food. Just like each other time he came with with three bowls in one hand, and small pot with a handle in the other. I couldn’t help but be envious of the craftsmanship, was it weird that I’d started wanting pots? Sometimes this life made me think I’d lost my mind, but I was also slowly coming to understand that my own perceptions. My thoughts didn’t really make sense sometimes. Why wouldn’t I want a nice pot after all? What was wrong with me cooking for ten goblins? I didn’t have any real answers, which made me instead start to consider that my gut was just off in ways. What sort of person, or life had I led that some of these ideas just seemed wrong? I didn’t think it was just the goblin thing either…

The man wasted no time as he set the pot down, and ladled some of its contents into a bowl, handing it out to Kay first, Joan next, and me last. He stood to leave as he usually did and I called after him, “Can… I can speak with you?”

He glanced back at me, “What?” All business, not a speck of mirth or even politeness.

I needed something, anything really, “Can we speak alone?”

He narrowed his eyes at me, “Whatever you need to say you can say here.” He stated firmly.

Why was he so suspicious!? I’m totally not some bad character! I’m just doing my best! Sure I was horrible at everything, but still!

As for what I wanted to say… I didn’t want to do that, even if Kay wasn’t my sister, the idea that I’d be corrupting her image of her real sister didn’t sit well with me. Then again I’d essentially stolen her body, so wasn’t that worse? What about the things the dungeon had let happen to her sister? The whole situation was so unconcerned with Kay and her sister’s fate. Maybe that's why it bothered me? So much for not thinking about it... No matter how I tried to think time refused to be kind, it was no different this man’s annoyed expression.

“Maybe we can make a trade?” I asked before he just left.

“You have nothing, what would you trade?” he asked obviously thinking I was an idiot.

I didn’t let it bother me and I placed my hand upon my breast, “I’m sure you have interests?” On self reflection this gesture probably looked somewhat silly. My form wasn’t exactly curvy as it was, and I was wearing a pile of pelts on top of that...

“Meryl! What are you saying?” Kay interjected herself upon realizing what I was saying, and doing.

The truth was, it didn’t hurt to break her heart. Maybe I’d feel different If I looked back at her, saw the pain, or the confusion that was probably there. All I was interested however was the looming man, the wall of muscle and how I could gain what he was. It wasn’t just because of my libido! This was for my freedom!

“I’m not that interested in an animal fucker.” He sniffed, almost disgusted by the notion.

I couldn’t help but stare in response. What!? Animal fucker? Had I done that? Wait, did he know about the goblins? Those were… more monsters? Less animals. “I think you are a bit confused? I don’t fuck animals…” I said after probably taking too long to consider, but my face clearly reflected my confusion.

“Then how did your people end up with those ears and tails?” he asked as if it was obvious.

Come to think of it… Before I could really consider it too deeply Kay leapt to my rescue, “They were gifts from the god of the hunt!” Still… Kay was this really something you should be on my side for? Didn’t I just betray your sisters memory?

“Yeah? So your denying that your not that different from the beast race?” He asked.

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I didn’t know what they were on about.

“The beast race are those humans who are imbued by the god of the hunt. We beast kin are their descendants, only containing a part of the hunter’s legacy.” Kay explained.

My brain instantly understood the conversation at that. The beast race were likely humanoid beasts, covered in fur and fearsome in presentation. Beast kin however were more human, so to a human, that would mean ‘fucking a beast’ was required to create a “beast kin.”

“Exactly… beast fuckers.” He sniffed.

I saw the obvious hole in his logic however and just ran with it, “The beast race is comprised of blessed humans. Not animals.”

Kay was a bit surprised at my interjection in fact she was practically glowing, “That's right!”

Wait… really? Sorry Kay… I just happened to understand, this wasn’t from your sister. I probably should have let Kay explain it, but honestly even if I was dead wrong, I just needed him to believe me. To be willing to go that far with me, I’d have tried practically anything if I thought it would work.

He considered that, “Hmm...”

“Besides, even if what you said was true, that has nothing to do with me… I’m more then human enough right?” I smiled up at him, shifting myself so that my legs were more visible rather then hidden under the poncho.

“What do you want…” He asked. “I can’t free you.” He noted, I wasn’t sure he accepted my logic, more like he was just moving from one topic to another.

“We can discuss it… what you can offer me, I mean. I understand that your not the reason we’re kept here.” I conceded.

He nodded, “Fine. I’ll return later, for now, I’m busy.” Hopefully when he returned he’d have more lust in his eyes and less suspicion.

No sooner then he left Joan spoke in a low warning, “Meryl, what your doing is dangerous...”

“Maybe, but is it more dangerous then sitting here waiting for them to release us?” I asked. I turned to see him, only now seeing that Kay’s moment of joy had become confusion and pain. That was more what I expected.

“No… I mean that your assuming he won’t touch you…” He said as though I had missed his point entirely.

“Why would I assume that?” I asked.

He frowned looking at Kay, who then said, “Wait.. are you serious? You’ll let him have his way with you?”

“If he wants to. I have more to gain then lose where that’s concerned.” I replied easily. Besides, he  looked positively scrumptious.

“What… What happened to you…” Kay breathed out.

I decided I’d admit some measure of the truth in that, if she wanted to know what had destroyed her little sister, then I could give her some closure in that right? “Goblins.” I uttered after a moment.

Kay gasped, “No…”

“When we are free, we’ll hunt them down, each and every one of them!” Joan stated firmly obvious anger flaring inside of him. For me or Kay, it was really all the same.

Yikes… I’d made the same misstep that the dungeon had. I’d not taken into consideration the further reaching implications of the goblins… “They also saved me.” I quickly added in a panic. I’d just dug a hole I had no intention of digging entirely by accident. I didn’t tell them that so they could try and seek revenge! I’d told her that so she would have some semblance of understanding, I was as it turned out a bit of an idiot after all.

“What do you mean?” Joan asked.

I’d gotten myself into this, now I had to get myself out some how. Best twist the truth as hard as I could, “If they hadn’t fed me I’d have died.” Pure truth, the problem was how to remove the blame from them regarding my capture? For that I had no details, no truth to rely upon. I’d been malnourished, barely eating. But the dungeon had explained that wasn’t his plan, it was just that Meryl had refused to eat anything. That might have been because of horny goblins, or maybe it was the loss of her husband? I didn’t have a clue, but I needed something plausible. “They found me injured from a fall. They brought me to their home, let me heal and fed me.”

Both of them frowned at me, “But you just said…”

“Not everything they did to me was good… but I’d be dead if not for them. So please, don’t think poorly of them, they are stupid creatures…” I stated the obvious, even now it was easy to blame them for their treatment, even if I understood it and had agreed to it.

Kay wrapped her arms around me, as though the fresh food was all but forgotten, “Meryl… You’re in there somewhere right? Trying to get out?”

“I don’t know. Maybe she died in the fall.” I offered back before I could think better of it.

Kay shook her head back at me, horror leaching into her features.

I was an idiot, no question. A long horrible silence filled the air, and finally Joan spoke up after a time, “We should eat while its still warm…”

He was right, it would only be far worse cold.

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