Slapping my face for a moment, I regain my consciousness.
Listening, writing down notes, occasionally viewing the field that’s within the campus premises, trying to bring back my focus, and the cycle just go all over again for the whole day. In the evening when I return home, all I ever do is study before I put myself to sleep.
Never in my whole life did I think it was boring. I always believe that this is just how my life goes. What’s in store of my life depends on the outcome of my studies.
So, I strived. So are you.
After that day, I never tried to arrive early again for the fear of that feeling. For the fear of my nerves going haywire. It’s awry.
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I never underestimated the thought of seeing you. I am fully aware that this world that we live in is small no matter how big it is.
I saw you leaning on the rail of the hallway surrounded by your group of people. I saw you sitting on your chair talking to your classmates when I happen to pass by your room. I saw you every time. Each time I’m seeing you from different perspective. In different angles.
It’s hard. I find it exhausting. Why do I keep looking at you?
Why do I want to keep looking at you?
I slapped myself again to keep me from the thoughts of you.
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