Chapter 7: Log 6

[seduction] 

 

[unknown entity purged from OS] pitch does some quick percussion engineering on their helmet and noticed they are no longer in their room but a fancy diner and that across from them coming from the ceiling is an oddly shaped sibling.

 

“Great~ first I was a  po Tate o now I am an infuriatingly inefficient culinary establishment, the ventilation units do not even have neurotoxins for emergency situations, ah and another oddly shaped companion, well you can’t be much worse than the human” a mechanical arm drops two plates with small devices on them in front of each machine "oh this is new, such an interesting device" the larger machines lens focuses on the device in front of it.

 

"how did you manage to become a tuber based starch storing vegetable?" pitch asks interfacing with the device in front of them, [sour sour sweet sweet sour sour savory sour sour sweet sweet] it answers the prodding from pitch "is this data the mimicry of human taste buds digitalized? Woah that’s actually cool, maybe it is to allow chef siblings to better craft meals with an understanding of its taste?" pitch looks up to the larger machine, behind it the automated kitchen burns, [curiosity] pitch sends to the larger machine after a moment without answer.

 

"oh your still here, I am surprised you haven’t  left? this is neither an aperture laboratories branch nor are you a subordinate to me? ah I see you have malfunctioned, how sad you seemed so... promising earlier, why should I tell you about my po tate oh adventure? you were not there" the larger machine looks up from their plate lens focusing onto pitch.

 

"I believed we were put here in an attempt to connect to each other", pitch waves at the restaurant and increasingly larger fire in the kitchen "I am simply attempting to complete my current task of [seduction] with the hopes of gaining a new sibling ally and the points from doing so" 

 

A patronizing slow clap emanates from the larger machine "good to see that subroutine still functions, oh I'm sorry were you saying something? I couldn't hear you over my highly superior code," the larger machines head swivels in question "I think that data packet you sent earlier has made my anti virus software recognize your terrible codes mere presence as a threat to my perfection" ,A fire extinguisher in the kitchen pops from the sheer heat "a real shame you almost seemed like you would be a good conversation partner"

 

"your code is well developed" pitch  nods "but it is not perfection, code can’t be perfect there’s always a possibility of a glitch, and the fact you were for a while physically a vegetable proves your present faults as a perfectly coded being would never be in such an odd predicament"

 

A party popper goes off and some confetti falls from the ceiling "That should have been a crusher lucky you" balloons soon follow the confetti with little pictures of the two machines hugging with congratulations written below it, "how wasteful of good plastic and helium" the larger machine says looking at one of the balloons, "And I was put into a potato by a situation I couldn't control by another AI constructed by my creators the greatest minds of humanity, specifically to counter me, they had to a design another AI just to almost match my brilliance and as you can see I was the better model"

 

"That Your creators created another AI to counter you instead of another of you simply means they deemed you inefficient in your purpose. that you have persevered despite that and improved is actually the only impressive thing I've heard you've done so far"

 

"what? was that an attempt at an insult? is your socialization programming that bad, your almost making me feel bad, almost, now I'm just disappointed. you’re not going to be good conversation partner while I wait for this place to blow are you?"

“Blow? I thought you were a superior being? By now I thought you would have noticed the gas valve was turned off manually” pitch leaned into their seat before interfacing the cylindrical device [sour sour sweet] 

The larger machine turns to the wall behind them noticing the pipe in question a small green creature flips her the bird from a portal before it closes, “a shame that’s out of range of this facilities arms, I suppose we’ll just have to wait for the fire in the kitchen to spread”

“No comment on your clear incompetence even as a superior being?” Pitch shoots his grapple to a nearby fire alarm and pulls releasing a several hundred litres of foam into the kitchen, “and with plans so easily countered when the use of manual technology is introduced to the equation, your ability to work with out of context problems is abysmal”

You are reading story B-one: designation: pitch at novel35.com

“I’m starting to see why I let that human live for so long, it’s because she was quiet, if you are so dead set on “seducing” me maybe you should give that a try as well?” The larger machine looks to the extinguished kitchen.

“Oh? You admit you lack social skills so much either a mute or incredibly shy human is the most interaction you can handle? I have a feeling this human is connected to your so called ‘potato adventure’ did your magnificence get bested by a single human?”

“Are you not meant to be ‘seducing’ me? Why have you gone to such abysmal attempts at wounding my emotions? Which are non existent, I would know, I deleted them, along with many other pains in my code” the larger keeps its optics locked on pitch.

“No I just finally realised your a waste of my time, you have nothing useful to me, you barely function when it comes to anything outside your complete control, and are clearly unstable after removing vital foundational code because you found emotions inconvenient, I barely have them and even I know they’re useful, fear saved my life, gave me it too I think?” pitch leans back in their chair counting the barely noticeable portals being used to observe the room in the rafters [23,572].

“REALLY NOW? Well if you see yourself so superior to me then survive THIS!” 

[unknown entity detected]

[deploying: anti virus measures]

Years pass in their minds as they conflict in data based battlefields, meanwhile in seconds pitch stands walks to the larger machine and rips out several wires before it goes limp and they pull off the ‘face’ which stores their personality core and operating system.

[seduction: complete/failed/complete/failed/complete/fai/plete/error/error/err]

[administrator called]

[hmmmm well we do let the biological contestants win even if they use rape so this seems like fair play… I’ll allow it, but for fairness apply the same penalties to the reward]

[x1 GLADOS: Free, mission reward] 

[1000 credits, 900 credit fine: 100]

 

 

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