Chapter 95: Chapter. 81: Memories

[If you are wondering how the alliance was formed, it was due to mana intent.] Glim explained, bringing me back to my senses.

I took a deep breath to answer the question. “Yes, it should allow your kind to prosper even if the nest is cleared.”

The Guardian stared ahead, seemingly reading whatever The System was saying. He closed his eyes and seemed to come to a decision.

“I am not your subordinate.”

“You are not.” I agreed instantly, I never even expected to land on such a situation to begin with.

The Guardian nodded, evidently pleased. His flesh had regenerated thanks to the potion, and even though he looked obviously weakened he could still kill me at any given time. A second of silence passed before it spoke again, simultaneously a notification came.

[Settlement: The Deep Dark has acquired a Guardian.]

[Parties allied to the Guardian of The Deep Dark Settlement are now part of the Settlement.]

Ha?

[Feat Achieved ⁠— Pacifist of the New World ⁠— You are the first to make peace with a monster in the New World. And more importantly, you are the very first to make any type of peace. +10% to all attributes when surrounded by allies.

“War. It’s. Bad…” ⁠— Ufanurgan, The Pillar.]

A Feat? I paused, before I heard the Guardian speak.

“I have attained a Feat,” he drew a breath before continuing. “If I am within 3,000 steps of the Settlement I stand to gain one-fifth of my attributes.”

My mind paused, and Glim bobbed. [He means if he is within 3 kilometers of the Settlement, he will gain a 20% boost to all his attributes.]

Oh.

“And who might you be? Ball of light?” The Guardian looked towards Glim. “You weren’t here just before, how did you get in?”

[Oh, hello! I am Glim!] Glim floated in front of The Guardian. [Nice to meet you, I am Blair’s System Generated Assistant, named by her, of course! You can now see me since we are allies! And very close allies! Nice to meet you!]

He snorted. “I see. A weird thing of the words of god.”

My mind in the meantime wandered off to the Feat. Did that just mean that whether I was with allies or alone I would gain 10% in extra attribute points? I tilted my head for a moment as I pondered. In a way I was now going to be at my peak whether I was accompanied by someone or not. Technically speaking it was a great power up, but at the same time, it felt right. So in the end, the Feat just felt right.

[Anyway, do you have a name? Or are you just, The Guardian?] Glim asked.

The Guardian grunted. “Sun. That is my name.”

I stared at him, Sun, out of curiosity. He seemed to be doing slightly better, at least visually speaking.

[Sun, Guardian of the Deep Dark. Lvl. 53]

As I stared at Sun and Glim, and their rather one-sided conversation, I couldn’t help but notice something weird. Or well, realize something. Perhaps it was because I felt safe now, but just a brief moment of clarity, and I found something odd.

“Glim, why are you still here?”

It froze mid air. [What’s that supposed to mean?!]

“Weren’t you just doing a System tour? When does that end?”

There was a period of silence. [It’s… Well… Since I am not really giving you information and so long as you don’t ask me too many questions I might never go away… At the same time it’s the same reason I never expected someone like the demon emperor to see me, or Elasia to exist⁠— or even just… Sun to be able to see me.]

“Aha…” I frowned, recalling my issues with Glim. “Tell me what happened with Elasia then?”

[You know I cannot.] It bobbed. [Maybe, call her with the bead instead and ask her? Just say that you are trying to force me to talk about the Champions and she might just tell you.]

I shook my head with a sigh. I really wasn’t keen on forcing information right now. Things were still a bit messy even if I had acquired an ally who is much stronger than me. And also a bunch of residents too from the sounds of it⁠— Wait.

“Sun, what happened to the ones of Blood, are they alive?”

He nodded decisively. “They should survive considering those of Moon now want to kill me instead. So even though I am your ally I cannot leave this cave for quite some time,” it mused before continuing. “That said, I can see you’re just a child Blair. I can just smell it. You are a cub.”

I felt suddenly awkward, but nodded anyway.

“You’ve already told me plenty of things just like I have to you. Your life is much messier than mine, much rockier, and less straightforward. Even if I’ve stared straight at death many more times than you, I am much older than you. Which makes me ask, how can you carry on with such a burden? You are alone.”

I frowned, feeling sudden annoyance. “Yeah I am, why does that concern you?”

“Because, I see an opportunity with you. I see an opportunity to avenge my people, something you might also see in me. I don’t know about that. My point is.” It paused. “Now that we are using each other to further our goals, your wellbeing is a concern of mine. I noticed it when you were telling me things, but you never spoke of your people much. Why?”

[Oh this is easy! She refuses to remember!]

“Glim!” I hissed with anger. It wasn’t right for it to say it in my place.

“Blair,” Sun called. “You are just a kid. I am old, before we came to this place, I was still affiliated with the voice of god. I am not from either of the four planets. I know more than you, and understand more than you. I also understand you are deeply hurt and are dealing in the best ways possible.”

He stood up and licked his bloodied paw before pacing and walking around me.

“At the same time, I see you as one of my kin now. Someone to be protected. And I’ll admit that I see you as someone inferior to me. Someone that I must protect and nurture until they can deal with the world on their own.”

I reached for my spear.

“You are just hurt, and it’s fine to be hurt. It is a normal practice for cubs to be abandoned and thrown into the wild. It is normal for those that reach adulthood to spite their parents. It’s a never ending cycle of hatred. I hated my parents too, but those that were born after I became the pack leader never hated anyone. You know why?” He asked me, staring down.

You are reading story Blair: A Non-Human LitRPG at novel35.com

“No.”

“Because I do not wish for those around me to experience the same kind of suffering that I went through, and because I too was helped through it. I wish to help those around me, the ones beneath me, and the ones that I care for. I can’t claim to care for you a lot, but I can say that I acknowledge you as part of my pack now. So, Blair. Tell me about your past, about your family, about the elves, and why is it that your hatred for the Woodland is so limited and so⁠— naive?”

Naive? I felt my head throb as some memories came, it was annoying. I hated it. He spoke again.

“Blair, you should let the adults handle things for you.”

“NO⁠—” I bellowed as another memory came. “No… I don’t want… adults to handle things.” I could see it. My parents were looking right at me, it was years ago. “I don’t… I don’t want to be caged and sheltered from the world. I don’t want to be told what to do, what is right or wrong, I don’t want to let the adults decide what I get to do⁠—” I stopped myself taking a deep breath, I felt cold sweat run down my neck. “I don’t… wish to remember.”

Sun stared at me with a weird expression. “But you must remember? It is the only way for growth to occur. Otherwise.” He circled around me. “You’ll eventually lose your mind. It’s already slowly eating you away, look at your reaction. Look at your hands.”

I looked at my spear shaft only to see that it was trembling. My grip was shaking.

“Just any mention of this topic and you become like this. If you were to encounter those of the Woodland, no⁠— if you were to see the same atrocity happen before you. How would you react? How much would you remember? Would you stay alive after?”

I bit my lip.

“I do remember everything you talked about, you are part of my pack now. Blair, I am here to protect you, at least until you are strong enough. Once that happens, you’ll be here to protect me, and I can at least say. Even though you encountered those of the Woodland your hatred for them is limited. It’s naive. So, once you remember things, how would you react? The issue seems to be outside hatred, outside⁠— a lot of things really. What is that haunts you? That you do not wish to remember?”

Things I didn’t wish to remember… My expression became ugly as some memories resurfaced, I tried to stop thinking about them, but it was pointless… I tightened my fist and looked down, I hated everything⁠— the world itself. But in the end, I also caved in.

“I was⁠—” A sigh left me, as unpleasant feelings overcame me. “a kid⁠—”

“Wait,” he interrupted. “Not everything at once. Start slowly. One event, one instance. I am helping you, not trying to make you go through the pain once more.”

I swallowed as my memories skimmed through vague feelings of dread, sadness and anger. I picked a random one, the one that bothered me the least, and did my best to remember. My absolute best.

“It was a sunny day⁠—”

◇ ◇ ◇

The sun shone bright. Or much brighter than usual, it filtered through the foliage and penetrated enough to bring light into the normally rather dark forest. The normal humid climate felt slightly dry, but nothing that was awful. I remembered. I wanted to head outside, and decided to climb through the window because the door was locked. It was always locked.

My parents were nowhere to be seen, nowhere to be found. I simply snuck around, being careful to not be seen by too many people. I just knew my parents wouldn’t like that, not like they liked a lot of things. It was always limited to teaching me at home, but never going out too much.

I remembered now.

I liked going out to this place in the forest. If I circled my house and followed along the vines of a certain tree of the dark, I would end up at that place. A small stream of water with a creek, the water itself shone occasionally with the colors of the sun depending on the day, and at the very center of the creek, with some dirt. There was a plant. It was small, very small, not even the size of my leg. But the plant shone with red and blue veins, it would move and smell things. I remembered, I would steal fruit from my house.

Right, meat would spoil and my parents were always out hunting. I wasn’t allowed to cook, so fruits were given to me until night⁠—

Whenever I would bring the red shaped spheres whose name I had forgotten, the plant would turn towards me and almost try to inch itself closer, but the dirt limited it. I felt pity at that time, but at the same time after I would approach with the fruit, it would pierce it and eat it from the inside like a worm. After this process the plant would become affectionate and rub on my hand.

It was nice, it made me feel wanted by something. The plant was what I considered my first friend⁠— I remembered. One time, when I brought the fruit, after much questioning if I had eaten, I was caught.

A friend of my parents followed me and told them, next thing I knew⁠— next thing I knew I was standing before the plant in the darkness of the night with a torch.

My parents inched me forward and forced me to⁠— burn it⁠—

◇ ◇ ◇

“The plant squealed with a shrill sound and died in that instant. Only for me to hear things like:

“You are better than this plant,” from my father.

And “Great things await you,” from my mother.

“The plant was my first friend.” I looked towards the Guardian, Sun. “I killed my first friend. Why did it have to happen?” I bit my lip as I continued, tears began to stream down my cheek, I felt pathetic. It was a plant... “It just liked to eat things.” I sobbed. “It was small and cute, like a tendril. Its roots spread into the river and through the rock. It was alive and sensitive to the light⁠— weak to fire. I remember it vividly now, Sun. It was my first friend⁠.”

He nodded with closed eyes. “It’s good that you can remember that. Do you miss it? Do you miss your friend?”

I agreed with a bit of shame. “I do.”

“If you miss them so much, then do not forget them. Blair,” he said with a shift in tone. “It is best to treasure the things that marked your life rather than bury them deep in your heart. The worst mistake you can make is to forget, but an even worse mistake is to dwell on it. Do not let it haunt you.”

I took a deep breath. Taking things to heart. He had heard me talk for hours… He wasn’t forceful like the humans.

“Thank you…” It nodded.

Best if I don’t forget… But do not let it haunt me. I closed my eyes. I am sorry for killing you. You were always there for me, waiting for me to bring you your next meal… I’ll miss you.

A small plant on the river creek, one that fed from water and my fruits. One that liked my offerings and was always there for me.

I sighed.

I have to move on⁠—

A notification came.

[Prophecy Knowledge Discovered ⁠— Man-Eater Tendrils (Dark Plant) ⁠— A small plant that resides on isolated places, it can feed off nutrients from the soil, from other plants or animal protein. Weak to fire. Thrives in dark and water-rich places.]

My mind paused⁠— froze. What?