Chapter 76: Chapter 76 – Contradiction

“Accept my offer, and I will end your life. Your story will be brought to an end, a diary closed before all its pages are used, everything that you knew will forevermore rest just shy of your reach. Yet, you will remember everything as your new story begins,” I explain my curse, pacing before the recruits as I once more consider the consequences of what I’m doing. I’ve gathered enough blood for this ritual to revive them.

They will become my responsibility. I’ve been hesitant to take this step, with a dozen excuses to justify it, but in the end, I’ve let myself stay weak for fear of making mistakes here. For fear of the responsibility that I must shoulder by taking these beings forever under my wing.

From today they will be mine, and I will be responsible for all of their mistakes.

“I’ve already described this curse in all its details. My heart is still, my flesh cold, and the sunlight sears my flesh down to the bone. Worse than that, I am made to obey my sire for as long as we both live,” I explain, meeting Lin the goblin’s nervous gaze while Ollie translates the gist of it for me. “You will live far longer than any others of your kind as age will not condemn us, and you will have a chance to gather wisdom beyond that of your kin. Yet, you will walk as a stranger even in the places you once called home, and you will be a monster to those who considered you family.

“Do you still wish to follow me on this path?” I ask, kneeling before the young goblin, lowering myself to her level.

Her hands are warm, twitching with nervous life as she growls a quick and confident reply to Ollie’s translation.

“She says yes,” the serpentine woman says, her tail writhing in excitement.

“Then give me your blood, give me your life,” I pull her hand closer, as Ollie explains. The goblin bobs her head quickly, and my instincts draw me in.

The corruptions of vampirism do not explain my bloodlust, as it was explained to me, that much change would twist a person’s mind and lead them to pure madness. That was Aldramodore’s experience with it, at least. Yet, there are other parts of my mind that are now manipulated by the curse.

The respect I must show to those willingly giving blood is one such corruption of my mind, but it is also a change that I can welcome. Lin, and anyone else in this position, deserve the greatest respect.

Why this change though? Why would a vampire be made to bow their heads? Why would our creators fail to instil us with bloodlust, is it that they want us sane?

What was the purpose of vampires from the eyes of our creator, whether they be god, man, or monster?

Lin looks down at me as I draw the blood from her veins. The flow is faster than anything that could come from a natural injury, but through my vampiric magics, I drain her to a husk in only a few minutes. There is no moment that I can find when she definitively passes from living to dead, she pales until her eyes close and sleep takes her.

She tastes of ashen earth, sweetened by the morning dew. A flavour that would not have tasted nearly so divine a few months ago.

Carefully lowering her dried remains to the ground, I turn next to Ollie.

“Should you accept this curse, you will become a powerful hunter, and time will forget that you exist, but the price will be steep. The sun and the light will seek your destruction, you will be forced to kill to maintain this facsimile of life.

“Do you still wish for this?” I meet her unflinching eyes as she quivers in excitement, holding out her hands ready to follow in the goblin’s steps.

I draw out her blood, sweet liquor warm with the heat of vengeance yet left undone. I drink until the shine leaves her eyes and her body slumps to the ground, but even then she holds firm to consciousness, smiling at me as she lays down to sleep. Any doubts she may have had for me are pushed aside by the hope she holds onto dearly.

I cherish the last of her life, the life that she’s given to me, a unique elixir that no other will ever taste. The last drop lingers on my tongue as I memorise her taste, the last of her life now boiling away inside of me, becoming my strength.

And what do I give her in return?

A curse, a burden, that she can never be relieved of.

The two lie perfectly still at my feet, but the men that are to become their prey squirm with life trembling in fear for what’s to come.

Carefully, I chain the two corpses to the ground, such that they will not tear at one another, and then I lock the imprisoned bandits within reach of the ghouls that are not yet risen.

Staring at my workings; the corpses, the prisoners condemned to a terrible death, the shelter converted from slave house to prison, I turn away to look instead upon my estate.

Most of my servants are already prepared to leave even though the sun is still high on the horizon.

“The roads are more violent than we anticipated,” Orland says, Semi’s advisor and my teacher. He stands by the doors of the entrance watching me closely. “Even with the mercenaries you’ve hired, it will still be a terrible risk to travel those roads as they are.”

“A more terrible risk awaits them should they stay,” I shake my head. “Every choice a leader makes comes with associated risk, I’ve prepared as best as I can. Now I must hope for luck to be on our side.”

“Have you done everything?” The man asks. “You’re choosing to stay, they’d be safer with you protecting them.”

“There are yet things that must be dealt with here,” I shake my head. “Noble money and schemes must be dealt with before they can hurt these people. If these new towns are to succeed at all, then it will be without noble influence, I must stay and end corruption right here.”

“You will not be there to protect those you are leading from the city,” Orland replies. “You will not have their protection, either. Will you have anyone to protect you when it is time for you to follow them?”

“I will make do.”

The look he gives me proves that he thinks me irrational in this, but he holds his tongue.

“My vampiric magics are made stronger by the blood of the powerful,” I explain, frowning. “I will need that strength where I am going.”

“A more reasonable justification,” he bows his head to me. “I am staying by your side, as you should already know. Your understanding of criminal relationships is still rudimentary at best. I’ll move our lessons towards recruitment shortly, as it seems to be an interest of yours.”

Glancing back to where Ollie and Lin rest, I follow the man.

“If it is not too great of a thing to ask, how do you separate good from evil?” Orland asks me. “We all embrace evil to some measure, it is the nature of our world. As criminals, we all understand that the rules of society no longer bind us, yet, most of us still wish to make the world better for those close to us, and I see the same in you. We still want to achieve something ‘good’, but what does that mean for you?”

“I am a noble, the blood flowing through my veins on the day I was born was heavy with responsibilities I still don’t fully understand, and I was raised to stand tall under the burden. I will provide a good life for the people that I serve, and I will try to improve the world for all others that I can.

“So, where is my dividing line? Those who put others in danger, those who make themselves threats. I hold no responsibility to their well-being and I will not have any shame in the pain I cause them.”

“What of the innocent that stand in your way?” He turns to me as I pause, my face frozen as I consider it. “There are nobles that are not evil, merely ignorant.”

“Who I was, you mean to say?”

I’m willingly condemning entire families even though the children have done nothing. Am I truly willing to go so far?

Yes.

The question doesn’t even raise the same doubts inside me as it once would have when I considered my murderous streak simply an aspect of my curse.

I see. Ever since the day I died, I’ve not been able to see death as such a terrible thing. Merry has convinced me that it is the trauma of being killed and watching my entire family die, but the cause is not overly important. My hesitation is now gone, and I do not miss it.

I have no intent to become a monster that slaughters endless scores of innocent people, I still wish to become the ideal noble, and it is easier to achieve without being constrained by my lost humanity.

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The nobles and knights I’ve targeted thus far have all been complicit in terrible crimes. That does not mean that they cannot also be mourned.

It is the same for my own family.

 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

 

A parasol protects me from the raging sunlight as I sip at sweet tea, listening to the various noble ladies trying and failing to contain their emotions.

“It is unbearable to let this go unanswered,” Shari whispers, leaning over the table as her eyes red. “Good Knights are dead, and our parents want to ignore it. They want to close up in their estates and hide!”

Pansy and the other girls here may have their differences at times, but they know when to set those differences aside. Everyone here is of a powerful family, with sufficient influence to affect an entire generation of nobility.

Even more so than me, as lacking the experience and relationships, I’m seen as something closer to a resource to be exploited, over an actual player in this noble game.

Today, however, everything is rather different. There are precious few others with us, a few close allies that are deemed trustworthy, and though they try to disguise it, heightened emotions have seized the table. Even the servants are on edge.

“What could kill a knight?” Pansy asks, her mouth set into a deep frown. “I’ve heard that some of the lesser nobles have been killed but I never thought… what nature of violence has stolen this city?”

“Father is quite upset, but he’s determined to hide,” Shari shakes her head and lifts a cup of tea to hide her quivering lips. “I was familiar with a few of the knights, they were worthy of their titles. They didn’t deserve this.”

No? The nobility was complicit in the destruction of this city, everything that the people are now suffering is a curse brought about by either noble failure or corruption. I do not want to dwell, but if my family deserved their fates, then so do all others that remain.

I would rather utilise criminal slavery to correct their flaws, but that is a power that I do not have and a responsibility that I cannot shoulder as I am. All I can do is limit the damage that these people are capable of, stealing their blood to reinforce my own power as I do.

I could keep them from troubling the refugees any further, once their money is stolen alongside their lives.

“We must work together to cleanse this city of the filth that has brought it low,” Pansy whispers, the fires in her eyes barely filtered at all. “I was willing to leave them to our parents, but it seems that our elders have all grown incompetent. Our own family has lost knights and I, too, will not let this offence go unanswered.”

“Do you not think it strange?” I ask, frowning as I stare at the table. I’ve never had much experience with acting, but this much I can do.

“There is much strange about this,” Shari all but spits. “What in particular are you referring to?”

“What could defeat a party of knights?” I ask. “Are there truly so many monsters capable of such? Is there no chance that it’s something else?”

“You think someone did this?” Pansy asks, peering at me curiously. “Who? In the current state of this city, is there anyone that would seek to cross us?”

“They would not expect to be discovered,” I shrug. “Is there anyone that would seek to undermine us?”

The pair stare at the table, no doubt passing through a long list of potential foes that might wish to hurt them.

“We all aspire to develop a duchy,” Pansy suggests, frowning as she considers it. “It’s the only reward which would be worthy of the risk.”

“If it’s so worthwhile, then why don’t they just set out to develop their own lands?” I ask. “Why is everyone so eager to join these efforts, but so loathe to take action for themselves?”

“If I were to develop ‘my lands’ it is my father that would take the credit,” Shari answers. “Those willing to take risks would reap no reward, and those who reap are not willing to take on the risks. Father already has trustworthy people managing his lands, after all.”

“Not to mention, this opportunity is uncommon. Not only can we claim these lands ourselves, but we’re also guaranteed that there are nearby towns to trade with, and rare beasts to hunt for funds. Normally something like this would be a serious investment that few nobles could afford.”

“So, you believe that some other nobles are seeking to weaken your position in these new lands by attacking your knights before you’ve even left?”

“Fewer knights in our family’s service means fewer knights will be spared to assist us,” Shari nods, her lips pursed. “They’ve gone far to disguise the killings to make it seem like it was the work of monsters, but… no, this just makes too much sense.”

“An alliance, then?” Pansy asks. “We must understand who is behind this and see that they are paid their due.”

“The most suspicious would be our new neighbours in these crown-granted lands, they have the most to gain from our failures,” Pansy says, drawing together a list and gathering us together for her plots.

It is a noble scheme, but not the same as I read in my books. The first step is spreading rumours, then constructing evidence to prove the rumours are true and isolating the parties involved from their allies. It’s disappointing how hesitant they are to take direct violent action.

I must remedy that, perhaps a more direct attack on their persons would inspire them to turn this conflict into a proper war.

Glancing at the barn where the slaves are kept, I consider the other trouble that I’m dealing with. A knight has a fancy for one of the people enslaved here, but should I purchase him, or steal him?

After the scheming is over, not nearly moving to my satisfaction, I go with Pansy to once again admire her ‘collection’. This time I pay closer mind to the scents and details of the pitiful creatures.

I find the beast that has taken the Knights affection standing subdued with the others, he has no spirit in his eyes and though physically he seems well, his mind is all but gone. I would not think to try and release him in this state, else he’d simply die trying to live on his own.

I must ensure that the knight takes proper care of him when I take them in.

“What’s special about this one?” I ask Pansy, looking him over and finding nothing special about him. I do wonder what the Knight sees.

“He’s a warrior of his people,” she says not bothering to hide her frown. “He’s supposed to be, but he’s been quiet ever since he came here. A good slave, but rather boring. I still want to see the soldier inside of him, but even having the knights work with him doesn’t seem to work.”

“I see,” I frown, realizing that Pansy is not going to willingly let this man out of her hands.

Thankfully there are other means of releasing him. I spare the man a brief smile before we move to sit for a while in the privacy this barn offers us. The slaves all quickly move to serve us.

“Thank you for coming here,” Pansy says, looking at the table. “This place is somewhere that I can be myself. The other nobles just don’t understand it, they see slaves as these prizes to be kept, but there’s more to it.

“I don’t have to pretend around these people,” she says, smiling warmly. “No one would believe a word from them. It’s nothing terrible, understand. I just don’t want to be a lady, every minute of my life.”

Pansy relaxes her firm posture, standing in front of the door and slowly sinking to the floor still wearing that honest smile. She lifts one leg, such as no noblewoman should ever do.

“I can trust you, too, can’t I?”

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