The meeting came to an end when Jae-hoon fell asleep. I was proud that I did my part because I interfered with the conversation between Jang Won-jo and Seo-yu hyung.
The afternoon sunlight pouring through the car window on the way to Seo-yu’s residence was comforting. Seo-yu hyung patted Jae-hoon, who was asleep while singing a lullaby in a low voice.
A warm breeze blew when I lowered the window. This was what a great afternoon might feel like. It was a moment when I enjoyed the relaxation.
“It would be nice to have a sibling.”
I almost hit the brake for a moment at Seo-yu hyung’s muttering.
All of a sudden? As expected, I couldn’t let my guard down.
“What are you talking about? What do you mean sibling?”
“Jae-hoon also needs a younger sibling. He’d be lonely if he were alone. It’d be lovely to have younger siblings, whether it’s a younger sister or a younger brother.”
His voice was gentle and quiet, much as when he put Jae-hoon to sleep. He had a relaxed face as if he was alone in a white field full of spring sunshine, but I felt cold as if I had fallen in the North Pole.
‘When Seoyu talks about the second child, oppose it.’
My older brother made a definite statement to Mom, Dad, and myself. He hasn’t given up on the second one yet, so oppose it if he brings it up.
Seo-yu hyung was a person who barely crossed the crisis of death when gave birth to Jae-hoon. Seo-yu hyung, who was lying down with a relaxed face, looked like someone who would never open his eyes again.
“Sung-hyun-ah, it’s good that you have an older brother, right? Don’t you think being the only child would have been lonely?”
“No, not at all. These days, it’s hard to have one and raise it well.”
To be honest, who wouldn’t want to see the daughter Seo-yu hyung gave birth to? However, if I sympathize, he may tell his spouse that my argument encouraged him. A second child was never allowed.
“You feel like you’re losing your parents’ affection when you have a younger sibling, then you become jealous. Even if you love them equally, it’s difficult to make them feel the same way.”
“When I was younger, I just felt fair.”
“Hyung and I don’t feel it because we are the younger brothers, and our older brothers may have been jealous.”
“Is that so…”
Seo-yu hyung, who was in distress, stopped talking. Only the occasional sound of Jae-hoon’s breathing could be heard in the car, as he slept quietly.
I thought maybe I made a mistake. Maybe I shouldn’t have brought up Seo-yu hyung’s older brother.
I’ve never experienced pain like Seo-yu hyung’s. So I wasn’t sure how much thought was required or how cautious I needed to be.
When I looked in the room mirror and saw Seo-yu hyung, I was taken aback. He was gently sweeping his eyes with his hands!
Kiik-
I hurriedly pulled over to the side of the road.
“Huh? Why did you stop…”
“Hyung, are you crying?”
“What?”
“Don’t cry. I’m sorry for bringing up your older brother. Why are you crying over such little matters?”
“What are you talking about? I didn’t cry!”
“You just wiped your tears. I saw it all!”
“That’s a yawn, don’t shout! Jae-hoon is going to wake up!”
After tossing and turning, Jae-hoon woke up as soon as Seo-yu hyung shouted.
“Waa, Daddy cried…?”
“I didn’t cry!”
“Yu Dad, you cry every day. Dad, I’ll pat you on the back.”
“I didn’t cry!”
Seo-yu hyung’s voice quiver at the end. I guess he just wants to cry some more. I couldn’t stop staring back and being restless. I was at a loss for what to do. Tissue, I need a tissue.
Vibrate-
Then I got a video call from my mother. I received it quickly.
“Mom!”
– Can you talk on the phone? Are you not driving?
“I stopped for a moment. Seo-yu hyung is crying again.”
“I didn’t cry! I didn’t cry!”
– Oh no, what happened?
– Why? What did he say?
– Well, Seo-yu cried again.
– Oh, he’s so soft-hearted and cries a lot…
“I didn’t cry. I yawned. I don’t cry at all!
– Please comfort him well. We’ll call you back later.
“Yes, Mom.”
“Don’t ever tell Choi Sung-hoon!”
The phone hung up on Seo-yu hyung even before he mentioned ‘Choi Seong-hoon-‘. Meanwhile, I came upon a handkerchief and gave it to Seo-yu hyung. Seo-yu hyung’s face flushed and he just stared at me, but Jae-hoon grabbed the handkerchief and wiped his father’s face. Seo-yu hyung then hugged Jaehoon.
“Jae-hoon-ah… ”
“Oh, Dad. Don’t cry.”
“I didn’t cry…”
“Yes, don’t cry.”
I was glad they had a good relationship. I started the car again, hoping that Jae-hoon would calm Seo-yu hyung’s heart.
Sung-hoon hyung must be flying by now. After hearing that Seo-yu hyung was crying, he… Ugh, it’s terrifying. I need to get Seo-yu hyung home as soon as possible, and then I need to escape to a safe place.
* * *
The lights were turned off at Seo-yu hyung’s house. The house where all the babysitters and housekeepers were on vacation seemed too spacious for Seo-yu hyung and Jae-hoon to be alone. Of course, there were guards guarding the front door 24 hours a day, but there was no one inside the house.
That’s why I didn’t say no to Seo-yu hyung’s offer of a can of beer. I put Jae-hoon to sleep and sat in the living room while Seo-yu hyung was preparing snacks.
A wedding picture was hanging larger than the TV next to the already large, dimly illuminated wall-mounted TV. Seo-yu hyung smiling happily while looking at the camera, while Sung-hoon hyung smile at Seo-yu hyung.
There was also a picture of Jae-hoon next to him, a picture of three family members together with Jae-hoon, a picture taken last year with my mom, dad, and me, as well as a picture of Seo-yu hyung’s elementary school graduation and Seo-yu hyung’s family picture, were displayed side by side.
A picture of my older brother when he was little will now be added next to this. When Sung-hoon hyung sees a photo of himself as a child, he would frown openly but does not take it down. Because Seo-yu hyung liked it.
I looked at Seo-yu hyung’s family photo. A little chubby mother, a father who wears glasses, Seo Yeon, who has a neat appearance, and Seo-yu hyung, a third-year middle school student who looks like a baby.
The four of them had a noticeable resemblance. Among them, Seo-yu hyung was so pretty and small that tears welled up in my eyes the first time I saw this picture.
How difficult it must have been to leave such a lovely and small youngest child behind. He was still quite small. He was too young to be alone.
On the anniversary of Seo-yu hyung’s parents, my mother and father always pay a visit to the memorial to greet them. Please continue to keep an eye on your adorable youngest son, who has now become our great second son. I went with them the first time and haven’t gone since. I felt so weird.
My parents would also pass away at some point.
There were times when I feel like trash when I see them who only exist in Seo-yu hyung’s family photos that were not in the world now.
I sat on the sofa and turned on the TV for no reason and put on a calm look.
“Here, it’s done.”
Just then, Seo-yu hyung came with a tray. I thought he didn’t cook at home, but he has been making a variety of side dishes right away. From grilled chicken wings to squid ink butter to corn salad.
“That’s awesome. I eat all the snacks. How do you do this?”
“It’s very simple.”
“Hyung, you’ve cooked a lot. Who did you learn from?”
“I watched on TV and browsed the Internet. And everyone can do this.”
I imagined a young Seo-yu hyung, who has not yet lost his baby fat, searching the internet to make foods by himself, making various side dishes, and boiling stew. Perhaps he prepared more side dishes. Seo-yu hyung might always eat and drink alone as well.
“Sung-hoon ssi, probably still on the plane, right? After all, I have to make dinner today. When Sung-hoon first came to my old house, the only thing I had was ramen, so I could only give him that.”
“I want to eat too.”
“Then stay for the meal.”
“I can’t…”
My older brother hasn’t seen Seo-yu hyung in two days, so his patience must have fallen to the lowest level, but if I stay here, he may not leave me alone.
I ate the appetizers prepared by Seo-yu hyung one by one while drinking a cool can of beer, and the slightly sweet ones were really good.
“Awesome. I wasn’t expecting this, but it’s so delicious.”
“Why don’t you expect it?”
“Do you know how to cook things like soup? Something like seafood soup.”
“The soup is for soju.”
“You just don’t know how to do it.”
“Even if I looked for it on the Internet, I wouldn’t be able to do it on my own. Unless someone teaches me.”
That’s what I thought. Seo-yu hyung was unlikely to have had anyone teach him how to cook.
I held out my beer can to Seo-yu hyung. Seo-yu hyung smiled brightly and tapped my beer can. The first beer can was quickly empty, and the second beer was served. I kept checking the time as I drank and ate. It was time for Sung-hoon hyung to be still on the flight.
“What are you going to cook for my older brother?”
“Well, I’m going to make some meat side dishes.”
“Do you have any ingredients at home?”
“There are six refrigerators. Everything must be there.”
Seo-yu hyung drank a bottle of beer after becoming arrogant. Seo-yu hyung told me not to drink too much alcohol with a somewhat reddish face.
“Why? I’m going to call the driver anyway.”
“Don’t drink too much. I looked on the internet and they said there was a food alley right next to your university. College students who drank a lot there got their wallets stolen when they were stretched out on the roadside.”
I knew, I knew it. I didn’t drink in places like that.
“And it’s rumored that when you live alone near the school, people just use it as their hideout. Be careful.”
My house had already turned into a hideout. There would still be a dozen or so people there right now.
“If you’re dating someone on campus, the rumor will spread out. So, date in moderation.”
Rumors were spreading at the constituency level.
Seo-yu hyung should have realized I was in my fourth year. I said it just in case.
“Hyung, I will graduate next semester.”
“That’s right. It’s difficult to find work these days, so don’t get too worked up about it.”
I stared at Seo-yu hyung’s reddish face.
Being so drunk on a can and a bottle of beer.
I couldn’t believe it.
Seo-yu hyung always wanted to be my older brother.
“It was an exam period not long ago. Did you get your report card?”
“Report card?”
“I was very good at fixing it. When I was in middle school, my friends were almost beaten up because of their grades, but I saved them.”
“…Hyung, you were a skilled person. You didn’t get caught?”
“Nope. If you think you’re going to be beaten, call me.”
“Okay. Hyung, eat some snacks while you drink.”
I gave Seo-yu hyung a squid leg and was shocked when he took it with his mouth rather than his hand. I almost leaped out of my seat when I saw the red lips slightly open.
“It’s delicious. Who grilled it?”
Seo-yu hyung mumbled and smiled mischievously.
Wow, fuck it. That wasn’t good for my heart.
I opened my third beer and drank it. After drinking it in, I put it down, and Seo-yu hyung held out a squid leg to me as if he was waiting. I cautiously took it in two fingers and chewed it.
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“Anyway, don’t worry about my grades. For 4th graders, my grade is enough.”
“That’s a relief. Your parents will like it. Go home more often. So that your parents don’t get upset.”
Laughter erupted as a result of the stream of emotions.
“Don’t worry. I’m very nice to my mom and dad. I haven’t met anyone among my friends who is more filial than myself.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I’m on the side of growing up early. My older brother has been away since I was little, and my mom and dad were always busy, so I grew up alone.”
“Really?”
“Besides, I wasn’t too bad at the time, so I was a decent student who had nice manners when I was a child. I’ve been maturing for some time now. As a result, I sometimes wonder when my friends will grow up when I see them.”
“I see.”
Seo-yu hyung stared at me with the eyes when he saw Jae-hoon do cute things. Like I said seeing something cute. His eyes were red and watery. Feeling somewhat embarrassed, I changed the topic.
“Seo-yu hyung, are you crying again? I think you’re crying.”
Seo-yu hyung closed his mouth and stared at me as soon as I finished speaking.
“No, I’m not. I try not to cry. Stop talking about that. You made my image weird.”
“I’ve met a lot of Omegas, but I’ve never met one who is as tearful and soft as you.”
“I’m not going to cry. Hey, honestly, when did I ever cry?”
Seo-yu hyung raised his voice as if he was embarrassed. I remember exactly when Seo-yu hyung cried.
“Hyung, you cried when you first came to our house.”
“That… I admit it, is there any other time besides that?”
“At that time, before you got married, you were hospitalized and cried when you were discharged.”
“It’s because of the lint…!”
“You cried again when you woke up after we went to the sea and Hyung almost died.”
“That…”
“And you cried on the way here today.”
“I’m seriously yawning today. Sung-hyung-ah, I swear to you.”
…I think the pronunciation sounded strange at the time, but his tongue was most likely twisted.
Seo-yu hyung drank a can of beer because he was ashamed of crying too often. I missed the timing to stop him.
He wiped his lips and looked at me with misty eyes.
“Hey, but to be honest, you cry a lot as well. At my wedding, you cried a lot. I thought there was a flood. Honestly, you were kind of embarrassed, right?
“That’s it. I cried then. Of course, I would cry. My older brother has a new family… I also thought that Seo-yu hyung, who had gone through a difficult time was now happy, and tears came out naturally. I’m not embarrassed at all.”
“…”
“My dad cried more than me.”
At the wedding and gatherings of all kinds of political and financial figures, my dad cried profusely. I was afraid he’d embarrass himself. Of course, it was not embarrassing that I cried.
Seo-yu hyung couldn’t make fun of me any longer when I mentioned my dad, so he just rummaged through the chicken wings.
“Be nice to Mom and Dad. Go home often so that they don’t feel sad.”
“…”
You were definitely drunk.
This wasn’t even soju, it was just beer. A sense of crisis came later. Wasn’t Sung-hoon hyung going to kill me at this point…?
“Hyung, stop drinking. I think you’re very drunk right now.”
“I’m going to eat this and get drunk. I’m not a kid.”
“No matter how you look at it, you seem like you’re already drunk. Just eat a lot of snacks.”
“I’m full since I’ve been eating too much since this morning.”
Seo-yu hyung placed his cheeks on the table and played with the chicken wings with chopsticks.
“I should probably go to the cooking class. I heard a lot of people going these days. I should also learn to cook.”
”…”
I didn’t know that I’d heard about learning something from Seo-yu hyung.
I kept contemplating whether to talk about this or not, but I have to say it since he mentioned it.
“Hyung, don’t you want to study other than cooking?”
“What kind of study?”
“It’s just studying at school. Getting a diploma… Don’t you want to go to university?”
“I’m so stupid that it’s no use trying. And what kind of university would accept me at this age?”
Seo-yu hyung laughed as if he heard something meaningless. He hadn’t even thought about it at all.
No. Why did you think so?
You might be able to do it well.
Age didn’t matter.
I mean, we have classmates in their 40s at our school.
Seo-yu hyung’s phone, which he had placed on the table, rang while I was pondering which words to spit out of the thoughts rushing through my mind.
[Sung-hoon♡]
I was completely taken aback when I saw the name. It was almost time to land. It was even a video call.
My older brother made a video call…
At this rate, he’d be sending emoticons as well.
“Ugh, I guess he is already in Korea.”
With his arms outstretched, Seo-yu hyung immediately picked up his phone and smiled warmly at the person who appeared on the screen.
“Choi Sung-hong ssi, are you in Korea?”
– …Have you been drinking?
“Yes, I’m drinking beer at home with Sung-hyun.”
– At this hour? It’s too early. The sun hasn’t set yet.
“I’m going to stop drinking now. It’s nice to see Sung-hyong’s face after a long time. I think I lost some weight.”
What do you mean after a long time. It had been barely two days.
– Seo-yu ssi… You’ve become more beautiful.
His voice was dripping with honey. Obviously, he’d have a gentle and loving expression.
“I really want to see your face. When are you going to arrive?”
– It takes about 30 minutes. Jae-hoon must be asleep.
“He was dozing off because he was full. Hold on. I’ll show you right away.”
I lightly stopped Seo-yu hyung as he was ready to stand up. Don’t wake him up if he’s sleeping.
– I’ll be right there. Please put Sung-hyun on the phone.
“Okay!”
There was no face on the screen when Seo-yu hyung, who replied brightly, handed me the phone. My brother switched to voice call mode.
“Hyu… hyung.”
– How much did you drink?
His voice was scary as he spoke. I counted how many bottles and cans there were on the table. I drank most of them.
“Hyung, about two cans and a half-bottle…”
– He cried today?
It wasn’t a given word, but I quickly understood it.
“On our way home earlier.”
I grabbed my phone and slowly got up. Seo-yu hyung didn’t care as he cleared the seat with a bright face.
“Seo-yu hyung said it would be good for Jae-hoon to have a younger brother, so I just objected. When the first child has a younger sibling, the first child will be jealous. We might not have realized it because we were the younger brothers. Then I brought up his older brother…”
– …
“I meant to make him give up the second child…”
A low sigh was heard.
My brother didn’t say much to me. He just sighed and hung up the phone after telling me to stop drinking and go home.
“Seo-yu hyung, I’m leaving. I had a nice time today.”
“We merely got together after a time, stay a little longer.”
Seo-yu hyung, who had just finished cleaning, had a sad expression on his face. It was unfortunate, but I had no choice but to leave now because I only have one life.
“I have to do my graduation assignment. I won’t have time to do it next semester, so I’ll do it now.”
“Ah, the assignment… Is it very difficult?”
“I don’t know. I’m so annoyed. I don’t even know what the letters are, so I Gestaltfall.”
“Huh, what kind of fall is it? Is it an accident-related topic?”
“No, no, no. It’s just a term. It’s too difficult.”
“It’s a phrase you use when you feel dizzy because it’s too difficult.”
“Is that so…”
I resisted wanting to stroke Seo-yu hyung’s hair.
“Tell Jae-hoon to listen to his father and be healthy.”
“Yeah, he’ll be sad when he wakes up and see his brother is not here.”
I really hope so. I called driver Oh while taking care of the car key. The driver who was already nearby answered the phone quickly.
“Ah!” said Seo-yu hyung as he unlocked the front door and put on his shoes to walk to the yard. He rushed into the house after that. I was concerned that he would fall because he was drunk. Soon after, Seo-yu hyung reappeared, holding something in his hand.
“I forgot about this and didn’t take it yesterday, so I couldn’t give it to you.”
“What’s this… Whistle?”
“Yeah, it’s dangerous at night, so take it with you.”
“…”
I was 193 cm tall and was an expert in a variety of sports and self-defense skills. I took it very bluntly.
“I’ll use it well. Thank you. When did you buy this?”
“I bought it a while ago while drinking. There’s nothing wrong with having it, so I bought it when I was buying it for your elder brother as well.”
“You got one for my older brother… What… What did he say?”
“He just said thank you. He hangs it on his cell phone. Do you want to as well? You can hang it on the case.”
A man who was 196 cm tall, weighs over 100 kg and has a muscular body… Even the world’s extremely dominant Alpha, who could do any martial art and was stronger than his bodyguards, was given a whistle since the road was dangerous at night.
I was sure the only person who cared about my older brother’s nightlife was Seo-yu hyung. From when he was a child the size of Jae-hoon until now, Seo-yu hyung would be the only one.
That was why I was going to die.
This was why my older brother was crazy over him.
“What’s the matter? Are you getting drunk?”
Seo-yu hyung was concerned when I laughed out loud. I told him it was nothing and thanked him again while raising the whistle to my eyes. It was a bright yellow color. Seo-yu hyung proudly said that it was a fluorescent material that was visible even at night.
All right.
I pondered how could people not adore him if his nature that popped out of his mind after drinking alcohol was a concern for his loved one.
It was such an understandable loveliness.
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