Nothing.
That's the word that I would use to describe the afterlife.
I used to be the religious type when I was younger. I'm sure I'm not the only one who decided to become a semi-devout believer once they learned about death. The inevitable end that awaits everything.
You can imagine what learning that one day you will cease to exist as you know it can do to a kid. So, I prayed. Every day, I would pray to God so that I may be one of those lucky individuals who can continue to exist. To join him in heaven for all eternity, without worries or woes.
But, as I grew older and began to experience life for myself, I stopped believing. I became an atheist of the highest order. I looked down with disdain at any that considered themselves religious. I thought them to be idiots that were too scared to face the reality. That after death there is no God, no Satan, no heaven, no hell. Only nothing. Probably just my teenage angst.
After my little emo phase, I opened my mind to the vastness of the universe. We, as humans, haven't even fully explored a measly planet, much less the ever-expanding universe. So, who is to say whether or not there exists a race of beings that have transcended what we believe to be the limits of existence. To become gods.
So, I became an agnostic. Because as we are now, it is impossible to ascertain whether God or anything like it exists. Maybe if God is real, I'll only end up in the first layer of hell for my agnosticism. Neither belief nor disbelief. I wonder if God likes middle ground. Well, if he is the omnibenevolent deity the bible makes him out to be I suppose he wouldn't mind. I hope.
As it stands now, it doesn't seem like I was wrong as a young angsty teen. Though it doesn't explain why I have a conscious still. Now that I died, I kind of hope I was wrong and there is something more. It seems like a waste of life looking back on it now.
It looks like I have time to think about how I died, not that I really want to but what else is there to do but think. I didn't die in a cool way, hell I didn't even get hit by a truck or bus like in animes. I got shot. By a junkie.
It was the evening, and I decided to go to the corner store and get some milk and eggs for the morning. I had a good day that day, so I was in a good mood which was evident by my humming. I got a look from a couple while I was picking up the eggs, but who cares what they think.
I had finished paying the cashier when the man behind me decided he would rob the store at gunpoint. I didn't feel like playing hero and dying so I put my hands up and let the man do his thing. I looked at him and I saw an emaciated man with a shaky hand. A junkie. Robbing the store so he can score his next high.
Can't imagine being addicted to something so harmful but unable to escape from its clutches. Well, I did play League of Legends almost every night, so I guess I do know what he is going through. Wonder which addiction is worse. But I did kind of feel bad for the guy, you know. I did anyways until he shot me.
The cashier gave him the money from the register and then the junkie looked at me.
'Fuck me.'
"You too. Give me your wallet. Hurry up!" he said.
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"Okay, I'm reaching for my wallet. I don't want to die today bud." As my hand crept to my back pocket for my wallet, I saw behind the junkie a wannabe hero winding up to hit him with a tall boy. I wanted to cry when I saw that. Why? Because anyone with a rational brain knows that if you hit someone, they tense up.
KABLAM!
In movies, the people always shrug off getting shot like they pinched their finger. In real life, not so much. All I felt was a searing hot pain as the bullet entered my body. Pain like nothing ever before assaulted my brain. Then silence. Like the whole world decided to watch me fall and die.
'Maybe I should buy a lottery ticket after this. I mean what are the chances of a strung-out junkie shooting me in the heart. Hopefully, I win. More money for League. Haha.'
Laughter is the best medicine after all. But this was too much damage for laughter to heal.
I saw the people in the corner store rush to my body and try to stop the bleeding. The hero of the day looked mortified at what he had caused. To my surprise, it was the man from the couple I had seen earlier. His revenge for my humming I suppose. The thought brought a small smile to my face.
"Hold on! Just hold on! The ambulance is on the way! Just try to hold on!"
"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I didn't know he would shoot you! I'm so sorry! Oh my god!" the hero said while crying his eyes out. Well, maybe not so much a hero anymore.
"I-it's okay. I f-forgive you." Lies. I didn't forgive him. It was his stupid decision to be the hero. Why couldn't he have been shot? Still, though I didn't want him to feel bad about this accident. He did what was right, what anyone with an ounce of kindness in their heart should do.
'Huh. I guess you do see your life flash before your eyes.' And boy did I. But it wasn't everything I did in life, it was only the good and the bad. The greatest hits. There weren't many though which was a bummer. Made me realize I should've done more in life. I did see my family a lot though, and I knew I had to tell them.
"T-tell…my family…I…l-loved them…" Each word was excruciating to get out but I had to let them know. I never showed it enough when I was alive, and I wasn't going to leave this earth without letting them know it.
Then I drifted to nothing.
And I awoke here.
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