Confession (Ying Cheng)

Chapter 56: CH 51


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Chapter 51: Let’s end it here.

Xu Sui went out and bought an ice cream, wandering aimlessly for a while before she felt bored and decided to sit down on a bench in the square. She quietly finished the sea salt ice cream in her hand, passing the time before heading back to school.

Zhou Jingze didn’t send her another message the entire night.

The next day, Xu Sui woke up earlier. She went to the library after washing up, headed to class at 10 o’clock, and returned back to the dormitory for a break after lunch.

She lay on the bed and took out her phone, scrolling casually. Her fingers subconsciously pressed on the social media app and searched for Emily’s page. It showed that Ye Saining had uploaded a vlog.

No, this word didn’t appear in that period. Instead, it should be said that she shared a short video of her daily life. Xu Sui clicked to open it, and it was a collection of her past week, with a total of about eight minutes.

The video shared Ye Saining’s daily life of shooting magazines, exhibitions she has seen, camera cuts, and various parties she attended. Xu Sui’s sharp eyes caught onto a guy, appearing 5 minutes and 30 seconds in from the video, for only three seconds. In the profile shot, he sat on a chair and smiled lazily, lowering his head to light a cigarette. His hands stretched out to cover the orange flame. The ripples of bright, sparkling light glistened behind him – a reckless and unruly Zhou Jingze.

The shot flashed by, followed by Ye Saining’s daily life of painting oil paintings. She was wearing blue overalls, a little yellow hat, and had a little colored paint on the tip of her nose. She was talented and beautiful.

There was a caption in the last few minutes of the video: I was too drunk and went to the hospital. Fortunately, I had my friend. Xu Sui glanced at the date. It was last night, so Zhou Jingze must have sent her there.

The shot changed, and in the early morning, the outside of the hospital was foggy, and a layer of milky white shrouded the trees. Ye Saining was quickly discharged from the hospital the next day. She was filming the road ahead, and there seemed to be a person beside her, but the person didn’t enter the shot.

Ye Saining said to the camera: “I saw that the front is selling steamed pork dumplings. It smells so good, and I haven’t eaten it for a long time.”

After speaking, she walked towards the breakfast stand with her phone and bought two steamed pork dumplings and a cup of soy milk. When she was about to pay money, she said: “Hey, let me borrow your phone, I’m using mine’s to shoot a video.”

The other party handed over his phone with a wide palm, clear and distinct knuckles, and a thin layer of calluses on the thumb.

Xu Sui’s heart was pulled fiercely. If only she didn’t know these hands.

Just a few days ago, these hands with clear joints was pressing against her ribs repeatedly, and the sweat of the two dripped together, lingering in love.

Ye Saining held the phone in her hand, and her sleeves moved up, revealing a silver watch on her slender wrist. Then, she made the payment smoothly, and the camera showed the code.

Zhou Jingze was wearing this watch some time ago. When the two were sleeping together, she glanced at it twice, and he took it off for her to play with.

Xu Sui was afraid of seeing anything else, so she hurriedly closed the video. Tears dripped down the phone screen, and her vision was blurred. She felt stomach acid traveling up and wanted to vomit.

She had already lost before she met Ye Saining.

Liang Shuang was watching a movie in the dormitory, and when she heard a slight sobbing sound, she hurriedly turned off her iPad, with a shocked expression on her face: “Sui Sui, what happened?”

“Nothing,” Xu Sui smiled while tears rolled down. Her eyes turned red, and she said softly, “The meal at noon was too spicy.”

A burst of throbbing pain in her heart after she knew it.

In the afternoon after class, Xu Sui went to an off-campus convenience store to buy oden. When she passed by the basketball court, there was a burst of applause.

Xu Sui couldn’t help but stop and look over. In summer, the shadows of the trees fell, and there were many people at the basketball court. Guys waving their arms and running on the court, while girls were eating their mung bean ice cream, watching their crush score a goal. Their eyes shone brightly.

She suddenly remembered that it was last summer that Zhou Jingze gave up the game because she fainted midway after scoring a goal.

Thinking of this, Xu Sui continued to walk and turned to a store around the corner. With a “ding dong” sound, the automatic sensor door of the convenience store opened. Xu Sui came in and ordered fish balls, chicken rolls, lotus root, chicken wings, deep fried tofu, and a carton of milk.

She often comes to this store to eat oden. The cashier recognized her, and naturally knew her taste, and asked with a smile, “Medium spicy?”

Xu Sui shook her head and said: “More spicier, the kind that makes your stomach burn.”

She likes this kind of self-abuse to vent, otherwise, depending on her personality, she doesn’t know how long she will hold it back.

Xu Sui took the tall paper bag and was about to pay the bill with her phone when there was a “ding dong” sound, and the door of the convenience store opened. A voice carrying a smile sounded:

“Your school is really big.”

“Of course. What do you think? Did you witness the future pilots’ shining eyes?” Sheng Nanzhou answered.

The girl has a very nice voice, husky but refreshing and clear. Xu Sui turned her head and met the girl’s gaze in mid-air.

This is the first time Xu Sui saw Ye Saining. She is very beautiful in real life. She wore an oversized boyfriend loose shirt, loosely revealing two thin collar bones, hip-length shorts, and her hair like black satin behind her ears. Tall and thin. She was ten times better looking than the photos.

Ye Saining also saw Xu Sui and was taken aback for a moment. Sheng Nanzhou stood behind her and looked down at the QQ group chat. His brows were twisted and he said, “Shit, it’s urgent training again.”

“It’s okay, you go to training first.” Ye Saining looked back at him.

Sheng Nanzhou nodded. He put his phone in his pocket and hurriedly said before leaving: “Walk around by yourself first, Lao Zhou and I will treat you to dinner later.”

“Alright. ”

Sheng Nanzhou rushed out so fast that he didn’t see Xu Sui standing by the snack shelf.

Xu Sui turned around to pay, and then took the food and snack to the table outside the convenience store. When passing by Ye Saining, her sleeve brushed against Xu Sui’s arm, and the material was very soft.

She smelled the faint scent of perfume on Ye Saining’s body.

Serge Lutens Fille en Aiguilles, unapproachable cold fragrance.

Xu Sui walked to the table outside and sat down. The air was stuffy and hot. Even at five o’clock in the afternoon, the cicadas were still chirping, and the evening crimson clouds were so thick that it was about to press down.

She had just broken the chopsticks and was about to eat when a shadow fell aside. The first thing to be put on the table was a piece of whole wheat bread and a box of yellow peach yogurt.

“Hello, can I sit here?” Ye Saining greeted her proactively.

Xu Sui nodded. Ye Saining pulled out the stool, and her slender legs entered sideways. She rolled up the sleeves of her shirt and began to tear the bread: “Zhou talked to me about you several times, you are a very good girl.”

Xu Sui paused. She lowered her head and stuffed a fish ball into her mouth, nodded and didn’t speak.

“I’ve chased Zhou before, and he’s the most difficult guy I’ve ever chased.” Ye Saining changed the subject, and the topic was frank and bold.

Xu Sui recalled her muddle-headed confession, and a smile appeared on the corner of her mouth: “Then I’m lucky.”

Ye Saining thought that Xu Sui would be unhappy or emotional if she said such blunt and purposeful words, but she didn’t, and she still ate her own food quietly.

It was hard to guess.

Ye Saining smiled and laughed, unconsciously stirring the yogurt in the cup with the spoon in her hand: “Do you know why he rejected me? He said he didn’t want to lose me.”

Xu Sui picked up another fish ball with her chopsticks. Hearing this, there was a pause, and the fish ball fell to the ground along the table, and she had no desire to eat anymore.

A dissolute person like Zhou Jingze, who doesn’t care about anything, if he said such a thing, then Ye Saining is really an important person to him.

Xu Sui took out a tissue, squatted down and picked up the ball on the ground before throwing it into the trash can. Then, she looked at Ye Saining and said, “Thank you, Miss Ye.”

Ye Saining was stunned. Her amber eyes were full of doubts: “Thank me? Don’t you hate me?”

Xu Sui packed her things and laughed when she heard this, saying frankly, “A little bit, but I hate myself even more.”

She hates herself for being like a slut, like a moth drawn to a flame with unconditional love to Zhou Jingze. And in the end, she was torn apart, even forgetting her own self-esteem.

She didn’t want to walk towards him again.

After speaking, Xu Sui turned and left. Ye Saining thought that she would be very happy when she won, but she wasn’t. She was so obedient and quiet and not aggressive at all, which made Ye Saining wonder if she played the wrong vicious woman.

“Of course, it’s amazing that you can stay with him for so long.” Ye Saining said, looking at the slender figure in front of her.

Xu Sui paused for a moment, and then continued to walk forward.

Xu Sui didn’t tell anyone about meeting Ye Saining. She went to eat after class as usual and was occasionally dragged by her roommates to participate in club activities.

When she was free these two days, she also seriously thought about a lot of things by herself.

On June 21, the summer solstice, the hottest time of the year, Zhou Jingze’s birthday finally came. Sheng Nanzhou booked a big private room for Zhou Jingze in Shengshi.

But that night, the two protagonists arrived late. Zhou Jingze sent a message to Sheng Nanzhou saying that something happened on the road and told them to play first.

At seven o’clock in the evening, Zhou Jingze was waiting for Xu Sui at the convenience store next to the Medical University. He was tall and straight, leaning lazily on the side of the green bus stop sign with broad and stiff shoulders. He held a cigarette in one hand and his phone in the other. He typed on the screen with his thumb: 【Sheng Nanzhou made a reservation, should we say hello before going to Grandpa’s house or just sneak out?】

After sending the message to Xu Sui, Zhou Jingze raised his eyes inadvertently, and when he saw the person coming towards, he twitched the corners of his lips. Unexpectedly seeing the person he wanted to see the least on his birthday.

Wearing a white shirt, Shi Yuejie walked up to Zhou Jingze with a bicycle. He hesitated for a moment and pushed up his glasses: “Jingze, today is your birthday. Dad wanted you to come home for dinner.”

Zhou Jingze sneered with the tip of his tongue against his chin. He gave him a sideways glance and said in a sarcastic tone, “Then do you think I should go back? Brother.”

Shi Yuejie lowered his eyes, and tried his best to keep himself calm: “Actually, we don’t need to be like this. What happened last time was a misunderstanding. I really didn’t know beforehand…”

When Zhou Jingze heard the word “misunderstanding”, Zhou Jingze held back the careless smile on his face. Looking at him, he spoke slowly: “Does it feel nice to get something that doesn’t belong to you?”

With a “bang”, Shi Yuejie let go, and the white bicycle hit the ground. He stepped forward and grabbed Zhou Jingze’s collar. His usual gentle appearance cracked: “What about you! What happened to the share transfer agreement transferred to Dad a while ago? On purpose?”

Last month, Zhou Zhengyan’s company received an express package, and after opening and looking at the document, it turned out it was a share transfer agreement sent by Zhou Jingze, and the person who ordered the share transfer was Shi Yuejie.

Zhou Jingze still inherited this share from his mother. If he transfers the share to Shi Yuejie, it means that he has nothing to do with the Zhou family.

He was actively breaking away with his family.

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Zhou Zhengyan immediately called Shi Yuejie to ask him what this meant. After Shi Yuejie took the document, his face changed, and his tone was a little flustered: “Dad, I don’t know how this happened, maybe Jingze made a mistake. I’ll go to school and ask him…”

Zhou Zhengyan got up from the sofa and walked over, patting him on the shoulder. His tone seemed intimate but carried some meaning: “Father hopes to see the relationship between you two brothers harmonious.”

“Peace is the most important thing in a family.”

Afterwards, Zhou Zhengyan often quarreled with Zhu Ling at home, and there were often sounds of throwing things in the room. Shi Yuejie often saw his mother running out with red eyes, and he hated himself. He hates his incompetency and his passive position in this family.

Shi Yuejie grabbed Zhou Jingze’s collar and stared at him. But Zhou Jingze held his chin up, chewing gum nonchalantly. His eyelids were not lifted, and he looked down at Shi Yuejie, giving off a condescending feeling.

Shi Yuejie only felt that he was being belittled, and his heart was full of anger. He tugged at his collar and asked, “Then Xu Sui? Did you intentionally agree to be with her to take revenge on me because I like her?”

It was rare for Zhou Jingze to look him straight in the eye. Shi Yuejie always had a gentle, dignified and good-natured appearance, but today it was quite strange to see him pissed off and jumping over the wall in a hurry.

He looked at Shi Yuejie and slowly remembered something. After Zhu Ling married in and brought Shi Yuejie, everything in the family has changed.

Zhou Jingze had a fiery temperament and didn’t care about anything. He can give Shi Yuejie half of what originally belonged to him.

Unexpectedly, they were not satisfied with this.

Every year on April 3rd, his mother’s memorial day, Zhou Jingze prepared a lot. He bought flowers and wrote letters to her in advance. But just when he was full of anticipation and ready to go with Zhou Zhengyan,

Shi Yuejie had a fever at this time.

Zhou Zhengyan took Shi Yuejie to see a doctor in a hurry, took care of him for a day, and was so busy that he ignored the memorial day for his wife. And Zhou Jingze sat in front of Yan Ning’s tomb all day alone.

At first, Zhou Jingze really thought that Shi Yuejie was sick, but later he found that Zhou Zhengyan was always absent from important occasions related to him.

Such as Zhou Jingze’s birthday, parent-teacher conferences, and graduation ceremonies.

And the reason was nothing more than Zhou Zhengyan wanting to take care of Zhu Ling or attending Shi Yuejie’s matters.

He seemed to be just an extra person in this family.

Only then did Zhou Jingze understand Shi Yuejie’s ambitions.

“Answer me!” Shi Yuejie roared.

Shi Yuejie’s roar pulled Zhou Jingze back from his thoughts. He raised his eyes, glanced at the stepbrother’s face, and squinted his eyes, admitting quickly:

“Yea, pretty nice, she threw herself at the door.”

When the words landed, Zhou Jingze received a swift and violent punch on the face. He turned his face, raised his hand, and touched the corner of his mouth, gently twisting his slender fingertips. The bright red blood seeped out between the fingers.

He sneered, and then swung his fist. The two quickly scuffled together, and the passers-by who stopped saw that the two were fighting too fiercely and didn’t dare to mediate them.

A row of bicycles placed on the bus stop sign hit the ground one after another, making a thumping sound.

Xu Sui didn’t know how long she stood there watching. Seeing that Zhou Jingze was punched to the ground, and then he grabbed Shi Yuejie’s collar with his backhand, she finally said, “Stop fighting.”

She stepped forward and used a lot of effort to forcefully separate the two. With a glance, both of them were in a tragic condition. Shi Yuejie looked embarrassed. He wiped the blood from his forehead and said: “Junior sister, when did you arrive? Please listen to my advice—”

Xu Sui lowered her head and took out a pack of tissues from her bag and handed it to him with a gentle voice: “Thank you, senior brother. Please wipe the wound on your body first. I have something to ask him, can you please excuse us?”

Shi Yuejie looked hesitant, and he took the tissue: “Okay, if you need anything, you can call me.”

People walked by, and Xu Sui stepped forward. She helped Zhou Jingze sit down in front of the bus stop and said softly: “You wait for me first.”

After she finished speaking, she turned and walked into a pharmacy. Not long after, Xu Sui walked towards Zhou Jingze carrying a small bag of medicine, a thin layer of sweat appeared on her forehead.

Xu Sui was sitting next to Zhou Jingze. She unpacked a pack of cotton swabs, dipped them in iodophor, and looked at him, “Lower your head a little.”

Zhou Jingze tilted his head sideways. She raised her face and carefully cleaned the blood wounds on his brow bones and the corners of his mouth. The more he saw Xu Sui’s calm face, the more flustered he felt.

To be honest, he wasn’t sure when Xu Sui came, how much she had heard, and whether she heard his words. He had no idea in his heart.

The cool summer wind blew onto her face, hot and sticky, and messed up Xu Sui’s hair. A strand of hair stuck onto her cheek, and Zhou Jingze raised his hand to touch her face, but Xu Sui turned sideways to hide.

After Xu Sui treated Zhou Jingze’s wound, she twisted the cap onto the bottle, and knocked on the body of the bottle unconsciously. She looked at him with an extremely calm tone:

“Zhou Jingze, let’s break up.”

She said this sentence as if she had practiced it repeatedly for a long time.

The sound of the wind stopped at this moment. Zhou Jingze looked up his eyelids in disbelief, dark red blood gushed from the freshly scabbed bloodstain on his brow bone, and his tone was somewhat hostile: “What did you say?”

Knowing that Zhou Jingze heard it, she didn’t repeat herself. She stuffed the medicine into a plastic bag and left it for him and got up to leave. Unexpectedly, she was pulled back by a strong force, and she couldn’t move an inch.

Zhou Jingze spoke very slowly, one word at a time:

“Explain clearly.”

Xu Sui lowered her eyes and let him clenched tightly, neither noisy nor fussy. A circle of red marks gradually formed on her wrist. Zhou Jingze relaxed a little, and was still grabbing onto her, slowing down his tone:

“If it’s because of Shi Yuejie, it is my fault for lying to you. At the beginning, I decided to be with you—”

“I saw Ye Saining wearing your watch on her page. “Xu Sui shook her head and said the name suddenly.

Zhou Jingze frowned and recalled: “It was the last party. She saw that my watch looked good and said she wanted to buy a watch of the same style… She’s my friend, I told you about it before.”

It was rare for him to say such a long sentence.

Xu Sui looked at him, her eyes becoming redder and redder: “What about the payment password? I don’t even seem to know the payment password on your phone.”

Zhou Jingze fell silent and said slowly after a while: “That was before—”

“Let me ask you directly, did you have a crush on her before?” Xu Sui’s voice trembled, and her nails dug into her palms.

Zhou Jingze was silent for a long time, then admitted, “Part of it.”

One sentence was enough.

But Xu Sui still refused to let herself go, and looked at him like she was torturing herself: “What about now?”

“Now—” Zhou Jingze was about to answer seriously.

“It doesn’t matter anymore.” Xu Sui interrupted him. Her voice was very soft, and a crystal-clear tear dropped to the ground.

From the conversation with Ye Saining and his answers, Xu Sui can probably piece together the story. A beautiful, cool girl with good taste like Ye Saining chased him, but Zhou Jingze refused.

There was only one reason. He cherished her and was willing to be friends with her.

How high is the other party’s position in his heart? Zhou Jingze, who couldn’t even care less, knows how to cherish others.

Ye Saining was different from them.

She tried to break free from his shackles, but Zhou Jingze refused to let go with a sullen face. He pulled Xu Sui into his arms, forcing her shoulders to lean against his chest. The familiar smell of mint mixed with tobacco penetrated the tip of her nose again. But she couldn’t break free no matter what. Zhou Jingze stuck to her body like a hot iron.

Xu Sui’s emotions finally broke down. Every time she said a word, tears fell down, and the tip of her nose and eyes were red: “You agreed to be with me on an impulse because of Shi Yuejie, I don’t blame you, because I understand. I know you don’t have a good relationship with him, so I figured it out. It’s just that what you said just now was a bit uncomfortable—”

Xu Sui seemed a little speechless. A hot tear dripped onto his neck, and she forced herself to say that sentence: “It’s true… I did throw myself at you.”

“I’m sorry.” Zhou Jingze’s voice was hoarse.

“Zhou Jingze, do you know why my nickname is Yi Yi? Because my father used to be a firefighter, and when my mother was giving birth to me, he had to be on duty, he only took a glance at me before leaving in a hurry. At that time, my grandma had to go to the household registration, and she wasn’t very literate. So when she went to the office, she saw the red banner hanging on the wall. Like drawing lots, she asked the staff what the third word on the banner was called and she said: Sui. Then, grandma named me Xu Sui.”

My father came back from the mission and was dissatisfied: “How can my precious daughter be named randomly? Her birth is the happiest thing in my life, and it is the most precious gift God gave me. She’s unique, one of a kind1Xu Sui’s nickname is 一 一 (Yī Yī). The character 一 has a literal meaning of the number “one”..”

“That’s why my nickname is Yi Yi.” Xu Sui looked at him and sniffed. Every time she said a word, the tattoo wound on the ribs were aching, and the pain caused her to press there subconsciously, “I hope that the other party only loves me wholeheartedly. Even when you went to pick up Ye Saining that day, I firmly believed that I will wait for you next time. You always have a casual attitude, but you hold it back when you like someone. You are very good, it’s just we aren’t suitable.”

Xu Sui wiped away her tears and left from embrace: “Let’s end it here.”

Zhou Jingze, the proud son of heaven, never lacked in admiration. Give your lover seven points, and keep three points to yourself. But Xu Sui probably had never restricted herself to seven points. When he likes you, he is vigorous, as if he would sail across for you, but when you calm down, you’ll find that it is you who is easily ignited, so you feel enthusiastic.

Even his love for you is careless and casual.

What can you do? It seems that he can only do this.

With the sound of brakes, the last night bus from the school arrived. People got off one after another. Some got off with a big bag of things, some students wore T-shirts and shorts and went straight to the school’s watermelon stand.

Zhou Jingze’s heart seemed to be bitten by insects, and dense surrounding pain numbed him. Regret and panic grew, and he wanted to reach out to grab Xu Sui who had left.

Unexpectedly, a group of people kept getting off the bus. They were flocking to the green bus stop, and during the period, someone bumped into him. The crowd kept coming, stretching the distance between the two.

The two of them were separated in the crowd.

Xu Sui took the opportunity to leave, and Zhou Jingze stared at her back. She was slender and fragile, but her steps were firm, without pausing.

She didn’t look back.

Not once.

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