Chapter 1: I’m a Cat Now Because Demon Thing Said So

'Well shit' Thought a formerly normal human as he stared at his now feline body and paws.

-o0o-

Poor kid was just minding his own business, reading a pretty dark Harry Potter fanfic when all of the sudden, OUT OF NOWHERE, he was face to face with... something. He didn't exactly know what it was, but it was something alright. What he was sure of though was that he should definitely have been screaming his head off at that moment, but was physically incapable of doing so due to the hand around throat.

Its face was a pure white mask, with only holes for the eyes, nose and mouth, reminding him of a puppet. Behind said mask-holes was a light blue glow that shone through each of them. That by itself would have been creepy already. But no! The real freaky part was that it was on all fours right on top of him, staring him in the face emotionlessly. And in that moment the kid was certain that he was about to get raped.

"Er... what the fu-" His question was interrupted when the thing in front of him just started screaming! Or... maybe screeching would be more accurate?

Its voice was extremely high pitched and reminded the kid vividly of his alarm clock, and overall was just- you know- TERRIFYING.

'Damn, what kind of horror movie bullshit did I find myself in?' He asked himself as he tried to move but failed to. Then he noticed that he was, in fact, not pissing himself. Surely that's what a normal person was supposed to do in this situation right? He knew for certain that his training as a professional martial artist didn't help at all in a situation like this, so what was going on?

"YyYy-yYooOuu-uoUu!" The thing stuttered out with a voice that would have made anyone within listening distance that isn't experiencing some sort of random calm piss themselves. What was worse was that the voice seemed to change tone and even accent every second. "S-s-sss-AAaaEeivvvvve T-tiemMm-me L-liiEEeeenn. I-I cooOmme f-for yy-YooUou."

At that point the kid noticed that he had been trying to speak... for some reason-as if it would help at all, but all that was coming out of his mouth were incoherent grunts. Deciding that maybe it would be easier to talk if he actually used his brain to do it, he started trying to shift through the endless questions running through his head, but before he could settle on one he felt himself being pulled by.... something. 

He was no longer in his bed. His computer was gone, his room was gone, and his house itself was gone. And worst of all...

His body was gone.

Or more specifically his human body.

Now, instead of looking down to see a hand with five fingers, he looked down to find a ginger paw with five claws.

He stared at the paw for a few seconds, trying to understand what it was, when his brain finally remembered.

Then, at that moment, all of the panic and emotions he should have been experiencing up until then-but wasn't-hit him all at once.

'...'

The kid passed out cold- or- more accurately, the ginger furred half-Kneazle passed out cold.

-o0o-

'Well shit' Thought the formerly normal human after waking up and finding himself staring at his new paws once again.

'So it wasn't a nightmare?' He started panicking, his brain running through every single possible situation he thought that he could be in at that moment, which-because he was an avid fiction enjoyer-consisted mostly of nonsense with only a few actually possible scenarios showing up occasionally.

'Calm the fuck down man, your losing your mind here!' He reprimanded himself. 'Why would you even think that? Obviously your not in the body of Crookshanks! There are so many other possible scenarios that we could be preparing for and you waste brain space on that?'

After being scolded thoroughly by himself (and trying not to acknowledge the crumbling sanity that that statement implied) the feline decided that he should probably look around and assess his surroundings.

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The first thing he noticed was the soft surface he was on, which by the looks of it was a scratching post. The second thing he noticed was the pair of giant chocolate brown eyes staring him down just a few inches from his face. The third was the ceiling, which was this strange cross between beige and purp- wait, what was that last thing?

"He's adorable!" The actually human teenager nearly screamed as she started to practically vibrate from excitement.

'Fucking OW!' The cat thought in pain as his ears curled back and he cringed. So he had enhanced hearing now too, good to know.

"Oh that one? His names Crookshanks, half Kneazle. He's been here for ages. Most people that get that close get their eyes clawed out before they can get a good look at him, I guess he likes you." An old man explained to the girl from behind the counter on the other side of the store.

The girl immediately grabbed the cat into a hug and with a huge smile ran up to her parents who were at the counter with the shops owner. She started rattling off questions to the owner about the cat in her arms, while said cat was too stunned to even try and struggle free. With the way she was holding him he was stuck staring directly at her face.

Her face that had two chocolate brown eyes and long, brown, curly hair. Her face that looked almost exactly like a young Emma Watson's.

'No.' The cat thought slowly as he slowly turned his head to look at the other animals in the shop.

Owls, cats, and toads taking up the majority of the space.

"He's been here so long that I had actually started trying to pay the customers to take him!" The old man joked, "I'm so glad that someone that he actually likes finally came along! I was starting to worry that he would never leave."

"But why wouldn't anyone want him?" The girl asked with an expression of pure confusion plastered across her face. She looked down and continued while staring at him, "He's beautiful! And look at his eyes! They're even more intelligent than one of my friends! How could anybody not want him?"

"Well young lady, beauty is a matter of opinion. And I am fairly certain that the reason most don't want him is because of his frightening intelligence. A lot of the people that take him even go as far as to swear to Merlin himself that the beast could read! And you know wizards don't like it when their pet is smarter than them." Out of the corner of his eye that cat could see a frown appear of the girl's mother's face.

'Is this actually happening right now?' The cat continued to think not caring about the conversation anymore. The girl, his body, his bodies name, Merlin, wizards, the animals in the shop, all of it was pointing in a direction that the cat was very apprehensive to follow.

"Well then, it was a pleasure doing business with you!" The old man said after a few minutes as they finished up their conversation and he took the silver coins from the girls father and handed him a bag of what was presumably cat food.

The family smiled at the man before turning and walking out of the store, the girl still holding her new cat in a death grip. Once they exited she moved her arms to bring the cat to face her.

"Well then Crookshanks, you get to live with me now! I do hope that you can become my familiar. My best friend has an owl familiar you know, she's snowy white and likes bacon. My other friend has a rat but he's always so mean to it so I doubt they have a familiar bond. Oh, and Neville has a toad, but it keeps trying to kill itself so they're also probably not familiars. But that's why I was so excited when Mum and Dad said I could get a pet, its always so lonely during the summers away from my friends." The girl paused mid ramble and blinked a few times. "Oh how rude of me, I didn't even introduce myself. My name is Hermione Granger!"

'God damnit.' Crookshanks deadpanned in his own mind as he was once again crushed by a hug and the girl started rambling again.

-o0o-

This is an edit of the original version of this fanfic that I wrote on Webnovel. With their recent update making it so you have to download the app to read past a certain point on fanfics there, I've decided to repost this somewhere else, and while I'm at it I figured I'd re-edit and polish it a bit. Once I finish re-writing the sixteen chapters I've got now I'll probably start adding new ones again since I don't want my multiple-chapter length notepad full of ideas for this to go to waste. But since I don't have the best track record when it comes to keeping uploads consistent, I wouldn't hold my breath on that if I were you.

Anyway, thanks for reading.

 

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