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He tried not to leave the witch’s side, but the time for it has come nonetheless.
It was shortly after Evan had just begun to deal with light. He went to the white snowfield and when he buried himself within it, he saw the slender and mystifying figure of Nyx. Feeling the full glow of light, Evan finally started to control it. It was all but a short-lived dream that had been arranged to deepen the despair ahead. Nyx shuffled the cards again, and this time too, Evan spectated her.
The day was not much different from usual. Evan watched Nyx close her eyes while arranging her deck of cards, just like always, refusing to miss her rare moments of defenselessness. Opening her eyes again, Nyx’s expression was deeply somber. Her black eyes, which were deep like clouds, actually betrayed emotion.
“What’s wrong? Is the future bad?”
When Evan asked, she turned the card over instead of answering. It was a white card. Maybe it meant a good thing, but there was a thin crack in Nyx’s expression and that induced anxiety in Evan’s mind.
“Nyx, you don’t look so good. What’s going on?”
Nyx shuffled the deck again and put them down one by one, but a card Evan was unfamiliar with had popped up. No matter how he looked at it, it portrayed the figure of a man who drove a sword into his own heart which, according to Nyx, meant a warrior who’d save the world.
“Evan.”
“Yes, tell me.”
Whatever she says, whatever she asks, I’ll do it. Just as long as she doesn’t leave me.
Evan looked up at Nyx with clear eyes, and after a moment of hesitation, she took something out of her arms. The object was made of clean silver. At first sight, it looked to be a necklace or an accessory for an outfit, but it was finely carved overall. With just a glance, Evan could recognize that it was a very valuable item.
After unwittingly receiving the item handed by Nyx, Evan held the object and was flustered by the subtle light on his palm. Somehow, the object no longer felt foreign. He was sure it was his first time seeing it, but it felt very familiar. Warmth and satisfaction that was akin to being under the sun rose within him.
“What is this?”
“Keep it with you. From now on, this is yours.”
“But what is it?”
“It’s something to protect you.”
Evan stroked the sharp pattern with his thumb and halted his motion at Nyx’s next words.
“Evan, you must go out to the world now.”
He expected it, but not this soon. When she allowed him to stay in the tower, she said, “You will have to leave at some point, and we will have to say goodbye when the time comes,” but Evan didn’t want to. He didn’t like it. So he shook his head vehemently with tears streaming down his face. Having experienced it many times before, Evan knew that Nyx was a very caring and tender-hearted woman, so he was counting on weakening her resolve once more by begging her to let him stay.
“Do I have to? Can’t I just stay here? I don’t want to go. I don’t want to be parted with you.”
He begged, holding her knuckles, but she replied coldly.
“If you don’t follow your destiny, I have no reason to be with you.”
Evan felt his feet failing him. All the things that he’d been holding onto in order to go on had swiftly rose and collapsed.
In the end, Nyx was indeed keeping him around because he was useful. Had he stopped being useful for her, she could have left him anytime. she could discard him as easily as she had collected him. It hurt all the same, despite him having expected it. It was so painful that it hurt just to breathe.
“Evan.”
He couldn’t show all that emotion to Nyx so he sealed his lips and endured. Even if he tried to stay by her side like this, he was sure to be abandoned soon. But if he did as she wished, she may always stay by his side even though he can’t be with her. Just like how she’d been doing all this time.
So it might be better to go along with what she wanted. It may be painful and agonizing right now, but at least she won’t leave this place. He can come to find her himself.
If he followed his destiny, then Nyx will be there for him.
Evan reached out and hugged her.
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“Always stay here. You can’t go anywhere. So that I can come to see you anytime.”
I’ll do anything if you allow that. If you keep looking at me with warm eyes, if you pat me with a friendly hand, there’ll be nothing more I can ask for.
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I will do anything if you stay with me, even if I can never reach you, and only feel the illusion of being with you.
Evan became a moth. He kept flapping his wings to catch the moon, but he ended up dying of exhaustion. Unable to give up the burning moon despite his inability to touch it.
“What should I do?”
Evan left Nyx’s arms and went into the world again.
Evan followed the Knights’ Commander’s instructions and went to his private home for training. There were many students of similar age to his, and the other members were also kind and friendly. It was the place where he had the normal and pleasant routine that he had hoped for.
Nevertheless, Evan felt empty in a corner of his mind. If he had met Yohan before Nyx, he would have enjoyed his current situation to his heart’s content. However, the emptiness in his mind could never be filled, all because he lost his heart’s most earnest wish.
But he didn’t let it show. At least he felt something following him, so he tried to be content with that. He couldn’t see, feel, or hear her voice, but she was with him. She wouldn’t know how happy he was knowing that.
He hasn’t forgotten her for a single day. He always thought about the witch who had come to his rescue since he was left alone in the world, who helped him mend his wounds and find his own light.
Rather than becoming blurred day by day, his memory of her became clearer and clearer. He wished he could control the light fully, so he could go and see her. It was his only wish and goal.
To his child self, Nyx was the only human on earth he never wanted to lose. But as he grew older, his perception of her had been overcome with greed. He was overwhelmed by emotions of wanting to keep her all to himself, to never give her to anyone.
Nevertheless, his greed had not eaten him. Evan was glad that Nyx was in the tower watching him, and he was relieved to find that he was still useful to her that if he was in danger or hurt, her Shadow approached him carefully and protected and petted him. That alone was satisfying, so he quietly focused on his own growth as she wanted.
But in fact, the anxiety in his mind was only subdued by a little. Not only did Evan not want Nyx to leave the tower, but he also didn’t want anyone else to visit the witch. He was always anxious that someone might visit her. Although he covered the tower with a thorny vine, he was still very upset since not all of it was hidden.
What if someone visited her and found out that the witch was actually a nice and kind woman? What if she ended up stepping out of the tower and lived her life to the fullest… without him? It was not only once or twice that he wished the witch’s forest and tower to be forgotten forever. He often had nightmares that there was no one in the tower, that he was left alone because he was no longer useful.
So every time the world was shaken with dark deeds and the existence of the witch was questioned, Evan had always denied it.
“Not the witch.”
“You’ve always been convinced that it was not the work of a witch. Is there a reason?”
The witch was not a woman to do so. I was a fact well-known to him. But he couldn’t say that.
“I asked if there was a reason.”
Why do people keep thinking of the witch? Can’t they just erase her from their memories forever?
“There was nothing.”
“What?”
“There was nothing in the witch’s tower. There was no witch, nor anything related to witches. From the very beginning, there was nothing but an empty and cold space.”
“How do you know that? Have you ever been to the tower of the witch?”
“Yes.”
“You certainly said that you didn’t see such a tower…”
“No, there was. It was just that there was nothing in it. I thought it was of no relation to any witch so I didn’t speak of it before. “
“I can’t believe you’ve been to the Witch’s Tower.”
“I heard that killing the witch would make the monsters disappear, so I went there. But there was nothing.”
There is a witch’s tower in the witch’s forest and there is a witch living in it.
But he didn’t want anyone to know that. He wanted only himself to ever know her. Only Evan should have known that the witch, a terrible, cruel, and feared existence, was actually a caring, beautiful, and lovely woman.
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