Chapter 353: Monsters

There were a bit of dry land and some cattails in the distance. And two or three medium-sized trees too: the trees were mostly scattered though.

We went there. I gathered some wood from the trees and the cotton from the cattails. But there was just one problem. All my godstones were gone thanks to my arm being cut off- so I didn't quite know how to make a fire in this place. Last night I could make a fire with flintstones cause it was dry. But this place was anything but dry.

I did have a flintstone but I doubted it'd work with this humid condition. I still gave it a few shots and after half a dozen tries, gave up.

"You better get used to raw food kid."

The thing gave me a rather disgusted look. "Gryole."

"What"

"That's my name."

A goblin. A name.

I couldn't help but chuckle. 

Oddly my sense of humor was still here, it must have been changed a little. 

Who was I kidding- I was laughing manually. I didn't feel anything particularly funny or appalling. It was all just a show. 

My last-ditch attempt to cling to my lost humanity. 

"Good for you, but I don't care."

Anyway, with that said, I tried to use light to light up the cotton. I focused a bit too much and it worked. 

Why hadn't I tried that before?

Hazy memory syndrome. 

Or maybe it was my innate fear of fire?

Undead were inherently afraid of fire, but in my case, that was probably subconscious. I bet I could even purposely put my foot in the fire- not that I'd ever do something like that. 

***

The brat ate plenty, after complaining for a good ten minutes how it tasted terrible.

But that was all and we were back on the road.

I hated this thing and yet I was somehow glad it was here.

The feeling was weird and hard to describe. Maybe I just wanted to cling to my humanity. But then again, no sane human would want to travel with a goblin of all things. 

'This was never normal, was it?'

Sigh.

I'd stopped worrying about all that though.

The thing didn't quite keep its mouth shut. Every now and then it asked me stuff, bothered me, cursed me when I didn't reply and this went on. I just ignored it.

And when I ignored it, it went on ranting… I still ignored it. 

We'd reached the end of the marshes by the evening. We still strode about a mile further in and then set up camp. According to the thing, it could still go on. About two minutes later it fell asleep while walking- so I couldn't really believe it now, could I?

Sigh.

With the thing asleep, I just watched the fire burn.

No fear.

'Am I not an undead then?'

Even now, even after all this, I couldn't quite be sure of what I was. My body acted like it was alive, but I knew I wasn't. After all, my heart wasn't beating- but I wasn't quite cold either, my body was warm like I was alive. If I was a halfdead, then I wouldn't be craving blood and if I was a vampire, then I wouldn't be craving meat. But I craved both and went mad when I was hungry. 

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So- even now, I couldn't really understand what I was. 

"I didn't expect you to take this one in. I thought you'd avoid this goblin just like that knight we encountered earlier."

The spirit manifested. 

Frankly, I thought so too, but here I was. 

"Why are you doing this? I mean all this time, you never bothered to show up. You only came in my dreams and now-"

The spirit looked like Biteria but with just black hair. 

It looked at me with dull eyes. "Long ago- I was a benevolent spirit of light. In time, due to circumstances, I got corrupted. Or rather, I let myself be corrupted. When I saw your light, I was attracted to you, but due to your intense burning light, I couldn't get near you, so I had to use your pet as a medium. However, once you died, I switched over to you and am now devoted to you as per accordance with my contract."

"But I don't recall ever making a contract with you."

"Our kiss- the kiss of that night- settled it. That was the contract. It bound us both till you die."

"But I am dead." And I couldn't really remember that first kiss the spirit was talking about.

"Mmmgh?" The goblin woke up. Its eyes went wide and it dragged itself away. "Go-ghost!"

The spirit disappeared. 

"Why the hell are you, a monster, afraid of ghosts all of a sudden? And that was my spirit."

And there were no ghosts in this world. There were plenty of undead though. Then again, I guess spirits could be classified as ghosts, especially the malicious ones like this.

The thing slightly calmed down. "From our perspective, you're the real monster." The little thing grumbled as it set next to the fire- a meter away from me.

"Oh? You attack us, kill us, use our women as breeding tools and you call us monsters?"

The little thing snorted. "OH really? And who do you think struck first? You don't kill us? You don't hunt us? You don't go around exterminating our whole colonies? Why do you think we even need to breed so quickly? Did it not occur to you even with that kind of breeding we don't have enough of us to raid a village let alone launch an attack on your cities? Besides, why'd we even bother attacking you."

Fierce- the words were fierce. 

Now I snorted. "That's what I wanna know. But I guess I can't just make assumptions knowing just one side. From my point of view, you're monsters. From your point, I am. And that's okay. But- when I find out more of this and solve the whole puzzle, I'll make a decision then on what to believe."

"And if you truly think we're monsters?"

I smiled. "Let's just say, heaven will welcome you with open arms." There were no heavens though. 

It growled but didn't say anything.

I had a feeling that answer did not please the little thing. 

I snorted again and just stared at the sky- the stars, and the moon.

***

I didn't sleep tonight either. 

My head was just clouded with thoughts.

I'd made a promise to Brenda about how I'd solve the mystery of the moon and all. But- at this point, promises sadly meant nothing. Everything felt empty. And I was gradually becoming more and more emotionless, I could feel it- the remnants of my humanity going away. 

Perhaps I'd turn into a full undead soon and my curse was keeping it all in check, speaking of the curse- wasn't it supposed to keep me alive even though I was dead? Well, technically this was that but still-

Sigh.

Thinking wasn't getting me anywhere. 

But at least the time was passing. 

At least I had another reason to go on.

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