Decline and Penance

Chapter 4: The Fourth


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After the two hours lecture on Central Decree Foundation & Ideology, the break begins. Although, Suni doesn't hurry to go socialize with the local students. That is not on his mind.

 

The thing that worries him is far from a healthy endeavour. He tries his luck with the one, who is sure to not report the misbehaviour. At least, he was like that, when they were friends. Suni hopes, it hasn't changed since then.

 

"Hey, do you know where to get... life fuel here?" Suni asks while leaning on the wall in the college's backyard. Hands crossed on his chest.

 

"Life fuel?"

 

Suni nods.

 

"I don't..." to the disbelief, the neighbor's kid looks confused.

 

"Something... that makes you... happy."

 

The neighbor's kid raises his brows. He has no idea.

 

"Do you really...?"

 

"Just tell me directly."

 

"Not in this place. What would you guess is simultaneously a life fuel and makes you happy?"

 

"I don't know... love?"

 

"Love?"

 

"It fits the description."

 

"Well, it's not love. Far from it."

 

Suni guesses, the provincial town is far too pure for the foul ways of the city to seep through.

 

The bell rings. Two more hours of Central Decree Jurisdiction & Laws.

 

"Forget it," Suni shouts through the loud sound of the bell.

 

He regrets concerning anyone with such a question. Even if the neighbor's kid doesn't understand the meaning, Suni feels regretful about spreading even a dime of his own, as he thinks, bad influence.

 

After the Law & Jurisdiction, there is Philosophy of Central Decree, then Central Decree Demographical Studies, then Sacred Literature of Central Decree, then Central Decree's Political History. And then... students, their heads filled with humanitarian studies, are allowed to go home.

 

Going home – Suni isn't excited about this idea. Especially, when he is almost out of... life fuel.

 

He goes back at a slow pace, contemplating if he should make any detours before reaching the mansion. Anything. Anything, but not to go there now.

 

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"How is your first day at school?" the familiar voice interrupts Suni's train of thought.

 

Right, he thinks, they live in the same direction. There was little to no chance that he would be left alone. Suni flinches the dark cloud in his mind – it isn't such a bad thing for them to return from the college together. It's only natural.

 

"Nothing unusual. Didn't even notice I got transferred."

 

They both chuckle – hesitantly, with restraint.

 

"I figured... it's the same everywhere."

 

"Absolutely same," Suni agrees.

 

After that, silence follows. Half awkward one, half – apprehensive. They walk together, barely looking at each other. Just a few more minutes before they reach the destination.

 

"You know... can I ask you something, Suni?" the silence gets cut short.

 

"Of course."

 

"But don't get upset that I assume that..."

 

"Ask already."

 

"Do you even... remember my name?"

 

"No."

 

"That's what I guessed. After you called me neighbor's kid back there."

 

"Yeah, sorry."

 

It's hard to guess if Suni actually felt remorseful or just apologized out of obvious politeness.

 

"I'm Var, in short", he extends his hand, expecting a greeting.

 

Suni meets it, shakes, "Nice to meet you."

 

"Meet you... again."

 

"Yes, again."

 

Suni smiles – for the first time since he has come here.

 

Finally.

 

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