Chapter 480: 480: Kamiko’s Confrontation

This chapter is from Kamiko's perspective

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*I don't know Kat. I don't know. I want you there. I… I'd be so much calmer if you were but… I don't know if that would be better. She's already calming me down so much. I'm not sure if I can actually manage without her keeping me calm. I wonder if she's using her aura for it, or if she's just that good? I know Elmony can scare people without it easily.* 

Kamiko's thoughts continued to attempt to run away from her, trying to bring her emotions further from her control, but Kat's slow stroking of her hair was doing wonders for the girl. A small niggling thought whispered that she should just stay like this, but Kamiko dismissed that just as fast as it appeared.

*I have to go alone, don't I?* Kamiko let the thought crystalise as much as she wanted to deny it. *I could take Kat with me, and it would be nice, but it'd just be nice for me. She doesn't need to mediate; she'd just be there as emotional support for me.* "I'll do this alone. I- I have to." Whispered Kamiko, but she knew it was loud enough for her friend.

Still, Kat's fingers didn't stop combing through Kamiko's hair merely slowed a bit. "I trust you Kamiko, if you think that's the best, I'd suggest you get ready to follow her"

Kamiko sighed as Kat's fingers slowed further as if she was saying 'I'm here to support you but it's time to go' and Kamiko really wished Kat wasn't so right. I have to do it though. Kamiko slowly pushed herself up from Kat's lap even though it felt like her strength was failing her. Kamiko's arms wobbled as Kat's hands dropped of her head and Kamiko nearly gave up right there.

But Kamiko knew that would be unacceptable. As painful as this was going to be, she knew doing nothing would be worse. Standing on shaking legs Kamiko headed for the second floor and let herself drop down. When her feet hit the ground she thought she was ready but she still stumble, falling in the process. Her arms were jelly as she tried to convince them to just let her stand back up but they were refusing to cooperate. Kamiko could see her tears as they gently fell to the floor.

*I thought I was calm. I thought I'd stopped crying. I wanted to think this didn't still hurt. Why does this hurt? This should be fine? She was happy wasn't she? I have a chance. Please tell me I still have a chance.* 

Kamiko let out a long shaking breath, and wondered for a brief moment if pumping her limbs full of demonic energy would help, but she could hardly even wrangle the energy as it was. Handling it rotating around for enhancement wasn't something she wanted to even attempt currently.

Eventually, Kamiko pulled herself to her knees, then managed to push off with her hands using her knees as a brace and returned to a standing position. She took a hesitant, shaky step forward heading towards Aslena's room. Every step closer felt like Kamiko was adding hundred kilogram weights to her feet. She didn't stop though. She knew she had to continue.

When she finally reached Aslena's door, it looked so tall once again. She didn't feel all that brave. She felt like she was five again, and Aslena was still twice her height. Kamiko gulped and pressed her hand onto the door pushing on it. When nothing happened she felt panic rising up within her and she pushed harder on the door. She felt her hands shake as the door refused to give way. *COME ON!*

Kamiko gave the door a shove with what strength she could muster but it refused to budge. Her hands dragged down as she felt her knees weakening until they hit the door handle which let out a click once it had been pulled down. Kamiko stared at her hands in horror, realising that she'd completely forgotten about door handles.

*GET IT TOGETHER!* She shouted through her mind. *COME ON KAMIKO Kat gave you the push you needed to get here. Aslena showed that she really did care. YOU need to show that this is important to you as well.* 

Kamiko pushed on the door again, and this time it swung open. Kamiko didn't even look at the changes to the room, her eyes were only for her sister. In the middle of Aslena's double bed, was the demon she was looking for. Aslena was hunched over hugging a pillow with all of her strength and crying into it.

At the sound, her head whipped up like a startled animal and her eyes went wide. The sisters stared at each other. Matching tracks of tears running down each other's' faces. Two strange sets of eyes stared into each other without giving an inch. Kamiko opened her mouth. She wanted to say something. Anything, the words clawed at her throat but nothing made it past her teeth. She let one hand clutch at her throat as she tried and tried and eventually managed to get out "I'm sorry"

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This was not what Aslena wanted or needed to hear though, she her crying increased two-fold and her chest started heaving with intense, wracking sobs. Kamiko didn't realise she'd moved until her arms were wrapping around Aslena, pillow and all. Aslena's tears soaked into Kamiko's outfit but that didn't matter.

The sisters just sat there together in each other's arms for a length of time neither could determine. Eventually though, Aslena said, "I'm a real bitch aren't I?" through her sobs.

Kamiko opened her mouth to retort, but the words wouldn't come. She knew this time it wasn't because she was unwilling to say them, but because denying the answer would be a lie. Kamiko searched for an answer, and found "You're my sister"

Another sob wracked Aslena's frame. "Yeah, yeah I guess I am. I noticed you didn't answer though. I… how bad was I? How much did I hurt you?"

Kamiko tightened her arms around Aslena but didn't answer. *How do I even answer a question like that?* "What do you mean?" she tried instead.

Aslena cackled through her tears but they didn't stop. "Ha- ha, y-you think I don't know? I… I… it hurts Kami. It hurts to know that despite all the clothes I've made for you, s-something I put together qu-quickly for a gag is the one you treasure m-most. I… I don't think I understood before. I-I know why though. I know why now and it hurts."

Kamiko decided to take a note from Kat's book and started to stroke her hands through Aslena's green hair, which had become a mess. She worked her way from left to right over and over, straightening it out the best she could. "Hey, it'll be ok…"

"Tell me then." Said Aslena, "Tell me you didn't keep it because they're from when I was nice to you. Tell me I'm wrong."

"You know I can't do that" said Kamiko softly, continuing her brushing.

"Why? I… I knew I was bad when we were little I knew that. I… I made a bunch of close for e-everyone but… but I m-made ALL of yours. E-even the ones that Mum would s-sometimes s-say she brought, I-I made them too. I-I think I wanted to apologise you know… I… I'm sorry I thought you hated me…" said Aslena.

"Why would I hate you Aslena?" asked Kamiko

"Please don't make me say it…" choked out Aslena

"Well… why  don't you tell me what changed? Why did this really wake you up?" asked Kamiko

"I-It was the way you said it… I think. Um… I knew I wasn't the b-best when I was younger, and… and I don't think I really got any better. I… I tried to just stay away as we were older but… I could… I couldn't stop teasing you. I… I don't know why? Why did I do that? I think… I think it hurt you ignored me. I-I was hurt you left me alone." Whispered Aslena

Kamiko tried to speak, but Aslena cut her off before she could try. "No. No don't try to make me feel better. I-it was my fault. I should have realised why you… you avoided me. A-after everything I made you do when I was younger…"

Kamiko let out a long sigh and kept moving her fingers. *What the heck am I doing? Aren't I the little sister here? I thought maybe we'd yell some more. Things would get a little better, or maybe even worse. I thought Aslena would tell me I'm an idiot, or that she just run away for a dumb reason like not wanting to see me cry… even if I only started crying after she left. What am I supposed to do? This… this is almost worse. This hurts me more than just Aslena being mean, this… it's painful to see her like this. What do I do? Kamiko what do you do?*

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