Chapter 1: 1

"Yes, yes. I'll transfer it tomorrow, on my day off." I clicked my tongue and again looked at my watch. How long did she want to talk?

"But...really, are you all right?"

Seriously?

I'm having trouble here, too, you know.

I get paid a pitiful sum every month, have trouble sleeping and frequently clock extra hours at work; my apartment fee is costly, and my ugly boss gives me the creeps whenever he looks at me.

I, however, only sighed. "Yeah, it's okay."

There was a long pause in the call. Was it closed already? But Mom spoke up again just as I was about to check.

"I'm sorry, Nad. Mom and Dad were supposed to make you happy and help you, but we're the ones who are bothered. I never gave you what you wanted, but now you're having trouble because of us." Mom's voice took a moment to come out, and when it did, it was shaky. "I don't

know who else I could ask for help, though. I swear, I swear this is the last-"

"What are you apologizing for?" It only made me feel bad. Do you seriously believe I came here on my own accord? Do you think I'm having fun working and putting in more than forty hours weekly?

"That's it. I'm tired. I want to rest. It's already late too." You see, I can't hold on to this tight feeling any longer.

"Don't go to bed too late. Remember to look after your health! Also, don't go out again. It's too late already!"

"Mom, you know I'm no longer a child."

"Alright, I'm hanging up," she said in the softest voice I could think of. After that, I heard the dotted static ringing, which meant the call was over.
I put away the phone and massaged my head, which was getting increasingly dizzy as the night went on.

What two worthless people! If you know, you're just bothering me, at least do something about it.

Since I was little, Mom and Dad have done nothing but complain about how they ended up being poor. They always thought they were too young to do anything and too old to make anything up to now.

Turned into disgusting parasites which could do nothing but beg, if that. A group that is always dependent on others and is looked down upon.

I hate them.

That's not how I want them to be.

"Hey! Are you done yet? It's taking so long." The door to my sanctuary was slammed hard, and I could hear a woman's voice with a haughty tone.

I got up and, slowly, carefully opened the door. I looked at each of the young girls in front of me. There were three of them, and they were all around seventeen years old and still wearing their high school uniforms.

"Move aside, Aunty. " One of the girls with her hair in a ponytail pushed me so hard to the side that I almost fell over.

Damn it! What in the world was she doing?

What did she call me, though? Aunty? Hadn't she had a mirror? Don't you see how smooth my face is because I do these things to it once a week?

Instead of telling her friend off for misbehaving, the other two girls laughed.

To some extent, this setting brings back fond memories.

Cornered in the toilet, stared at with a half-disgusted, half-scornful gaze.

Ah, damn! Why do I even think about the past at times like this?

I'm in a bad mood.

I'm afraid that if I stay here too long, I'll "explode" and do something I might later regret.

So I left with a feeling that I couldn't make up for, no matter how hard I tried.

When I returned to the main level, it was just as chaotic as before. There was pounding music, crowds of people swarming around each other in an illusion of happiness, and the sweet, pungent odor of alcohol permeated the space.

When my favorite person arrived, I smiled and walked to the tender table. "Randy," I said with a big smile.

The young man stopped washing his glass and awkwardly looked up. "E-eh, Ms. Nadia. What's up?"

He always tried to look away when we were about to look at each other. As if I were something annoying that you should stay away from. Something scary enough to be respected and feared.

I thought about my boss at work. When he sees me thus intimidated, does he get the same warm fuzzies I do? "Ren. Can I confide in you? ...."

Randi looked at me with doubt, then at his coworker, who just gave him a thumbs up and smiled. "Um. Ma'am, what do you want to talk about?" He got a bottle of gin and filled my empty glass with it.

I slowly took one sip.

Letting the liquid flow down my throat in a rush of sweet, sour, and hot tastes.

When it got to my esophagus, my head felt light right away.

"You remembered that frickin old geezer I told you about yesterday?"

Randi nodded doubtfully.

I was also too tired for a moment to think about it. My stress and anger had been building up again, but I was here to let off steam.

"He keeps looking at me. He gave those creepy gazes at me while I was sitting, walking, or talking with clients. I thought I could finally get away from him during a break, but you know what? He actually asked me to join him for lunch."

I grimaced when I thought about what had happened a few hours ago.

"Why don't you just say yes?" Josua stopped them all of a sudden. He was my friend in college and owned this place. I pondered how the sweet and mild-mannered Rendi could feel at ease working for him. I mean, look at those sharp, yellow eyes. They remind me of the eyes of a hungry, ruthless hyena.

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"Tsk! You know, he's such a grouch. He has bad breath, is frickin womanizer, and tends to boast carelessly--"

"But doesn't he have money?"

I looked into Josua's eyes, feeling annoyed. Hih! Yes, this guy has always been a pain. "Heh! What kind of woman do you think I am, hmm?"
Josua gave me a slack-jawed look, glanced away for a second, and then stood up again while displaying a small book of numbers that gave me a vertiginous feeling.

"What is it?"

"Your debt notes, ma'am," Josua answered sarcastically. "The first time you came here, you were upset that you hadn't gotten your paycheck yet. The second time, you forgot to bring your wallet. The third time, it was my birthday, and you begged for a treat."

I put the book down and frowned. "Geez, Josua. You include that too?"

Josua just gave a casual shrug and picked up another glass to clean.

"You're totally out of line!" I made a noise and smacked the table.

The whole room went silent at once, and everyone turned to look at me. I knew Josua was a jerk, but sometimes he was kidding (although his jokes often went too far).

But at that moment, my mind felt cloudy, heavy, and hard to control. Even the next thing I did surprised me a lot.

I reached into my purse and took out bills worth $100 at a time.

How much did he say I owe him, huh? That stingy capitalist jerk.

"Here!" I threw the money right at Josua's face, turned around, and left.

After hearing him say some crazy things earlier, I didn't want to stay here any longer.

"Eh, where are you going?"

I turned my head and looked at Randy, who was confused. When he's in trouble, he looks even cuter. "Bye, Randy. We hope to see each other again soon." At the same time, I slammed the door of the bar and walked out.

It was also crowded outside. Horns were honking. The moon shone brightly while the traffic lights flashed. An icy kiss from the wind tickled my skin.

Hih! It's freezing!

I should have started out wearing thicker clothes. But thicker clothes are more expensive, and I only have a little money now.

Ah! Money! Right. I'm in trouble, and tomorrow I have to send the rest of my salary to Mom.

Why did I give Josua that much earlier?

Idiot! Idiot! Idiot!

"You don't need to look so scary. Your friend is still a long way away, after all. So why don't we do something fun while we wait?"

As soon as I heard that voice, I stopped. When I turned around, I saw three big shadows cornering one trim silhouette
right at the corner of the narrow alley where the light was very bright.

As I moved toward them, I could see them better. Three ugly, disheveled men, all dressed in rags, hunched over, and staggering were on either side of a girl in a high school uniform who looked scared.

To put it mildly, it looked like the girl was fighting back. But the three men were very aggressive.

It was hopeless. She was finished.

Poor girl.

Oh, right, what was I thinking?

Yes, right, my salary.

Argghh!

I felt my head was getting heavier the more I thought about it. I feel like I've only had a few drinks, but usually, I can hold up to two bottles.

"Hey!"

Tsk! If you're going to do that, do it quietly, you scumbag.

"Come back here!" Again, it was that man's voice. More powerful, angrier, and... closer?

Wait. I also heard feet moving quickly. Not only one but also two, three, and four.

Perhaps...

When I turned around to find out what was happening, I was knocked to the ground.

There was still a green light on. There were a lot of heavy, fast-moving cars on the road.

I fall out right in the middle of the road.

I didn't have the energy to get up.

Sharp penny lights blinked at me from both sides. Four-wheeled vehicles came from both directions, squeezing me and ready to crush my whole body.

Before my memory completely blanked out, I heard a loud siren and that girl. The one in high school uniform. She gave me a mixed look of shock, dismay, rage, and strange satisfaction on her face.

Then everything went dark.

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