Don’t Call Me a Grim Reaper!

Chapter 1: Chapter. 1: Kaiti Necros


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“I-Is it alright, M-Miss?” 

I nodded. “Yep, just take it.”

Taking the gummy worm that I had given him, he stuffed it into his mouth. His eyes sparkling as he smiled at me. Happiness is everything. I smiled. Though, how come everyone seemed so happy here? 

“Thank you so much, Miss.” His caretaker ⁠— mother I presumed ⁠— thanked me with a wide smile as she put her hand over her kid. “Thank the girl, hurry!” 

“T-Thank you!” He slightly bowed at me, making me smile wider. Perhaps I could make them happier. I set my backpack on the ground and knelt in front of the kid. 

I nodded at him and leaned into his ear. “Hey, don’t you want to die?” I smiled, his eyes stared at me in pause. I know, it’s quite the revelation, isn’t it? The secret to happiness. 

“W-What did you say?” He stuttered in… shock? What was so shocking? He was… trembling? Why? Ah! He mustn’t have heard me! 

I stood over the kid, his mother looking at me in confusion. My eyes looked at him straight, his emotions were ones in between uncertainty and denial; whether it was his eyes shaking, or his mouth moving trying to say something, but again; I understood. Secrets like these were shocking, and especially shocking to humans. 

“Ehem...” I cleared my throat. Why don’t you die? Or rather, why don’t you let me kill you?” I smiled at them.”I will show you happiness, an eternal, neverending one. The path to Elysium.” Ah, bliss! 

Nothing! Absolutely nothing was better than death. An eternal happiness. One that would last for eternity. As a future guide of the lost souls, I understood. It was an eternal bliss, a never ending joy, it was… the path to Elysium. A paradise. I got excited simply thinking about it! A place where everyone could be happy⁠!— 

SLAP! 

Eh? I paused, bringing a hand to the burning sensation on my cheek. What happened? Hearing the chirping sounds of the birds nearby, I recovered; my eyes looking at the kid’s mother who was now furious. 

“Don’t talk to my son like that ever again!” She hissed, the hostility in her eyes reminiscent of an ancient predator of the Underworld. 

I tilted my head. “I am just telling the truth.” His child, the little devil, looked at his mother with confusion, and at me with mixed feelings. Terror? Pity? I couldn’t make them out. But before I could convince them about the advantages of death, the mother took the kid with a huff. 

I touched my cheek again, looking at the grass blades that moved with the wind, at the perching brilliant sun, and at the red bricks that made the little walkway of the park. I absentmindedly massaged my cheek before going to sit down on a nearby bench next to the grass.

Strange. Humans were strange. I did receive basic education about their society, I passed the simulations too. But their ideals were… strange. I had lost count⁠— no. The mother was the… third, no fourth? That seemed to have a rather strange reaction towards death. I didn’t understand it, what was so bad about death? 

They were treating it closer to how the denizens of the Underworld treat the concept of end. 

The keepers of the lost souls whose vessels had been lost; the Grim Reapers. Our, No. Their job was an honorable one in the Underworld. Handling anything soul-death related as the keepers of souls. Or the lost souls, ones who had lost their corporeal flesh, or died. 

In conclusion, “Humans are ignorant.” I nodded to myself. 

“I agree with you, young one.” Eh? A raspy voice came from my right. “I witnessed your conversation with the Madam.” 

I turned to my right., Aa bald man sat there, his wrinkled skin full of moles and age spots caught my interest. His eyes looked ahead through circular black-tinted glasses. I guess I hadn’t sensed him earlier. Too preoccupied? He was rather serene. 

“Hmm?” He turned to look at me, seeing I wasn’t replying. 

“Aah, sorry I was just surprised.” I paused. ”I was… thinking…” The old man seemed to like the response, for he simply smiled widely, his yellowed teeth in full display. 

“Thinking is good. Reflection is the path to peace. Looks like you already have your path, so I might not be needed here.” With those words he stood up, but I slightly frowned. 

“I just want happiness, for me, and those around me.” I said, shaking my head. 

“Hmm, happiness is good. Though perhaps nigh unobtainable.” He looked into the distance and then back at me, giving me a smile, though. It wasn’t… It was heartfelt. 

I felt as if I was being mocked. “Death is the ultimate happiness; an eternal one!" I scoffed. At least to humans it was… 

“For some, death is happiness, but how can you assure that every single dead person is happy? Some people will cling to life. And even if they can reach happiness from death, in those moments of transition…” He pushed his glasses forward, looking at me in the eyes. “In those moments, are they still happy?” 

“That⁠—” I paused. Would they still be happy? Clinging to their material possessions… I carefully mulled over his questions, but⁠— 

“It’s good that you think about it, so long as you can think and improve. Then your philosophy will be sharpened, and eventually you will reach your own Elysium.” With those parting words, he walked away. 

I humphed. There is only one Elysium! And I knew of it. 

◇ ◇ ◇ 

Grim Reaper, one of the many professions in the Underworld, and one among the three exalted ones. But even then, I considered it the most important. While others did things with flesh or bone, Grim Reapers touched upon the very soul. 

In a place where fighting and battle is common; where grief and despair was common. Grim Reapers helped others instead. Well, I⁠— we helped too; just differently. 

I nodded to myself with a small smile. My training in the human realm had just begun. Exciting! 

"Katy," the man paused.  

"Ah, yes?!" I jolted straight looking at the papers in front of me. Human paperwork! "Sorry, I was just thinking… And…"

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I fidgeted seeing the man's eyes digging into me. His receding white hairline and sharp eyes made me somewhat nervous, he was also wearing rather formal clothes in the form of a coat!

"I-It's Kaiti," I mumbled, feeling oppressed by the office environment. The quietness, loneliness and dull colors weren't for me. Even the Underworld had some shades of red. 

"Right." He cleared his throat. "Miss, Kaiti Necros, if you agree to the lease and its terms, do sign here and here." He pointed, his finger going over specific parts of the document.

"Ookay…" Why did humans use such backward ways for such things? Couldn't they use some sort of blood for the contract? Well granted⁠— not everyone had blood. But it was rather universal. 

As I grabbed the 'ballpoint' pen — great invention may I add — the man went over other documents.

"Anyway Kaiti, you will be added to the lease, along with Asth— Ash— what's with you people and your weird names nowadays—" He coughed. "Forgive my rudeness, your names aren't any of my business."

"It's okay," I nodded. I'll just forget your soul when the time comes… I wasn't going to tolerate any such disrespects, towards me or my family! Though, for now… 

I quickly signed with the pen. It felt nice to use in comparison to the annoying quill tips in the Underworld. I should probably bring some home during vacations~ Though; was there even vacation to be had? 

"Looks like you're all done," he nodded. "This is to contact me." Oh a card? 

I gracefully accepted it, calling cards were rare even in the Underworld. Allowing instant contact between two parties was more common in the human world — though I did not think they'd have calling cards here. It was certainly convenient. 

I bowed. "I'll forever be in your debt." Proper etiquette was essential to a Grim Reaper! 

"Y-Yes you should get going," he stuttered. "Also it's just a business card, no need to be so… formal." 

"I understand." I nodded.

Calling cards were business cards here? Huh, a commonplace item? Humans were getting more and more interesting! Exciting!

Getting up from my seat, I looked down at the man. He was my 'landlord' while the concept sounded ridiculous to me. I mean, lording over the land, moreover, lording over me? The next Grim Reaper of the Necros family? It was scoff worthy! Anyway, he owned multiple properties, or lands, as the landlord he rented them out to people. Though money wasn't really a problem, since I had a monthly budget provided to me which included rent. 

"I will be leaving now."

"Kaiti," he called as I touched the door handle.

"Yes?" What could he want now?

"Remember the rules, no drugs, no pets, and no parties." He said, his tone serious.

I paused. "... I understand." While I didn't know what drugs were, he couldn't tell me what to do! Though perhaps…

I looked at him, making him raise an eyebrow in confusion. No, no way he will be happy simply because I had followed the rules. I shook my head and opened the door, there was no need to make him upset. 

"Kaiti, I will be seeing you around."

"You too…" he smiled hearing me.

I left and closed the door. The clicking hollowly echoing in the dull hallway. Completely empty… perfect… I sighed. 

“What the hell was I supposed to reply to seeing him around?! Ugh! Such a dumb reply!” Dumb! I grumbled under my breath. 

But… he did smile… I think… It felt nice. I heard footsteps coming down the hall, making me turn around. It was a man, his hair tidied back, and he wore a formal outfit, reminding me of the butlers back home; clad in a jet-black suit ⁠— a negotiator! Or something close to that. 

"Oh," he paused seeing me. "Were you here for Mr. Sullivan's legal advice?"

"Mr. Sullivan?" I tilted my head. Legal advice, what was that? Wait... Advice? Legal advice? What did legality mean? Legal… meant — bound by law — laws? A law… advice of law. 

Law… law of death!

My face lit up.

"You want to die too?!" Ah how joyous! A human that finally understood!

No wait… His face scrunched. Oh right, there were other types of laws. I awkwardly scratched my cheek. I had put the carriage before the hound… Before I could correct myself, the man adjusted his tie. 

"I will be…" he paused. "With Mr. Sullivan now, excuse me." He brushed past me and opened the door.

"Ah!" How could I forget?! "If you need a guide to your soul, do let me know!" I enthusiastically informed him.

Though I got no response. He simply closed the door leaving me alone. I scoffed.

"Tsk, you can wander between life and death then!" I grumbled. And here I was extending a helping hand! Instead of smiling at me, he just ignored me! Simply ungrateful! 


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