Chapter 44: Scene 38 – Envious Appeal

"At some point, I have to ask." Amanda paused her search of the brand-new library, staring directly at Holly. The bee mascot was seated directly across from the doll, thumbing through the pages of a serious-looking tome. "How can you read with a blindfold on? Wouldn't that make it difficult to see the book?"

"The blindfold izzn't for me." Holly turned the page, reading about something or other you can't quite make out. "The blindfold izz for the world, so the audience doesn't look at me. It givezz me some privacy from their gaze. Think of it more like a curtain than anything obstructing my view."

"So, when you made out with Venus, she gave you a blindfold as a present... but the blindfold doesn't obscure your vision; it obscures the vision of some mythical audience." Amanda pursed her lips as best she could. "Right. That makes complete sense."

"I don't have the wordzz to explain it, Amanda. We're being watched at all timezz, and only I seem able to see it." Holly closed her book tight with a thump, forever obscuring its contents to you. "We're standing atop a stage, just actorzz following a script. We exizzt to entertain otherzz. The longer I spend a monster, the more sure I am of this truth."

"Holly..." Amanda drew close, putting a pile of musty books on the table next to Holly. She sat on the couch next to her favorite mascot and pulled her close. "You are not a monster. We might be Malice, but we're cute. Beautiful things can never be monsters."

"What about vampirezz? They seem plenty cute, but they're monsters." Holly folded her arms and looked away from Amanda. The dungeon core was trying to compliment her, but she wasn't having any of it. "Whatever Calico did to me, I can't unsee it. The audience is just there, watching me with bated breath. I try to keep my thoughtzz away from them, and they only look closer. Sometimes they throw popcorn."

"Is throwing popcorn bad?" Amanda thought about it. "I like popcorn."

"It makes me feel inzzecure," Holly huffed. "What if they decide I'm not entertaining enough? What happenzz to me after that? I have no idea what to do about them. They want things I'm not about to give them."

"Like what?" Amanda smiled mischievously. "No kisses for your dungeon core?"

"N-no. I can give kizzes." Holly covered her face. "They just have to look away."

"Look away? But don't you want them to look at us as we... you know..." Amanda whispered sweet nothings to her acolyte. Some of it is hard for you to make out, but you catch a few glimpses here and there. "I can make you a happy honeybee, Holly. You'll be begging for your lady to take another drink."

"What about Gaia? I read all about what went down in the dungeon core." Holly pointed at a slim magazine, Calico's memories from last night. "She'zz going to be your wife, isn't she? To make out with me, that's..." Holly hesitated. "I don't want her to get in the way of uzz."

"Why would she get in the way of us making out?" Amanda blinked. "You think she wouldn't like it if I was happy?"

"No, that'zz not what I?" Holly tried to figure out the right words to use for this situation. "I don't like it when you make out with other people."

"Even though you made out with Nebulossom Venus?" Amanda grasped a cup filled with honey, lapping at the surface as she kept her eyes fixed on the squirming mascot. "I'm not holding that against you, Holly. There's enough of you to go around. There's enough of me to go around, considering I'm more structural than human-al now."

"You're the whole zztage." Holly groaned. "I can't dezzcribe it. I feel uncomfortable imagining you kizzing someone other than me."

"Why can't I kiss you?" Amanda smiled. "I'm starting to get really good at it."

"No, that's-- you know what I mean!" Holly huffed, looking pointedly into Amanda's eyes. "I don't know how to rezzolve this feeling. I feel pozzezzive of you. Does that make senzze?"

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"I think you're worried I won't be able to give you attention when I'm with someone else." Amanda let one of her claws rest on Holly's shoulder. "But that won't ever happen. I've been watching you since the moment you stepped into my territory, and I've never been apart from you since."

"...not once?" Holly shuffled her thighs nervously. Her honey was boiling hot in her suit, her hands drawing from their folded position to cover her eyes. Amanda was just too cute to handle.

"Not once. All of this-- everything around you? That's me. You shouldn't feel like I don't have time for you because I always have time for you. You are my everything. In a way, you're a part of me." Amanda let her claw rest on Holly's bosom now. "As long as I live, I will be a part of you. That's an oath."

"I... I accept thizz oath. I won't get jealous, I promizze. Since you're alwayzz with me..." Holly wrapped her lady in a hug, holding her tight.

"I'm glad you talked to me about this." Amanda did her part, hugging Holly and gently stroking her wings. The thin blue membranes seemed sensitive enough, eliciting a gasp from the mascot holding her. "If you hadn't spoken up, I might not have addressed it. Communication is important, isn't it?"

"...why were you so lonely before thizz?" Holly nuzzled against Amanda's monitor, feeling the warmth of the CRT screen. "I read about you in the book, and it wazz so sad. You seem so nice. You communicate and talk thingzz out."

"I hadn't thought about it," Amanda mumbled. "I had friends at some point. Some guys I was close to in high school. We'd play video games together, and we'd chat. It was a nice party every week. Although... I hated myself. I think I caused many problems between the four of us because of what I did and said. I guess it just got harder and harder to talk to them because they only did guy things? I don't even know what guy things are anymore. I just felt like maybe they hated me just like I hated myself."

"Hard to imagine someone who praizzes themzzelves so frequently could be insecure," Holly chuckled.

"What! I might be cute, but I'm allowed to think bad thoughts about myself!" Then, it was Amanda's turn to act indignant. "I played a lot of online games and made online friends there. I learned how to be nice to others, but it was too late to keep the friendships I had..."

"Cherry-tapping izz not nice." Holly tried to stick out her tongue, honey splashing against her mouthguard.

"Oh, I'd like to see you play a fighting game," Amanda snickered. "They're so hard if you don't cheat!"

"Then it'zz a date. Let's get out of this muzzty library and play a fighting game." Holly planted a honeyed kiss on Amanda's screen. "I will show you how a real gamer playzz."

"Oh, you're on." Amanda narrowed her eyes and scooped the mascot right off her couch. "To the dungeon core!"

Holly allowed herself to be carried off, forgetting about the mass of whimzy in the library rafters. The nest of sparkly pink silk hung down from the roof like a chandelier, pulsing and shifting. As the doors drew to a close on the library and the candles snuffed out, the thing inside squirmed in its sack. The only source of light came from its antennae, and if you were watching? You would have seen it extend the silhouette of an elongated claw.

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