Chapter 50: Scene 44 – Calling in Jest

"She won at Hoopla, First," Lease hissed, black and forked tongue rolling out of her mouth. "Nobody wins at Hoopla. It's an impossibility! The rings are too small for the pins. I know that. YOU know that! Find where she went; burn her house down if you have to."

Lease was a slim-shouldered jester, the Ringmistress of the Cheery Traveling Circus. She wore a white mask that obscured half her face and smeared a purple star over her visible eye. Her jingly purple uniform gave way to white and black stripes around her disconnected sleeves and banded waist, and her pale fingers toyed with a weightless mallet. Lease was seated at the desk inside her caravan; business dealings should happen close to the dungeon core. That was rule number one of being a Fae Noble.

"Maybe we can chill with the arson?" First Troupe rubbed his face. He was tired, and no matter how much the strongman exercised, he couldn't shake that feeling of exhaustion. Dealing with Lease Troupe, the head of the family, tended to exacerbate those feelings. "Ma, I've tested that game, and there's, well, a very rare chance that she happened to find a loophole?"

"Loophole?" Lease squinted at First, leaning in real close and putting her eye against his chiseled chest. "Are you implying my games are rigged?"

"No? Well, yes, but not in that way." First tugged at his collar, losing confidence in his ability to calm Lease down. "I'm just saying that maybe we should take it easy on the customers? She could have found a way to win. You wouldn't make an unwinnable game, would you?"

"I saw her cheat, First!" Lease huffed and folded her arms, swinging back in her seat and kicking her legs up. "If you won't find that miscreant and bring her to justice, I'll just have to—"

Lease's thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of a circular device on her desk. She set her mallet down, squeezing and molding her hands to fit inside the artifact. "I've got to take this. Find out who she is and where she lives. I'm going to get my plushies back."

"Right, ma. I'll get on it." First Troupe let out a sigh and trudged out the door, closing the wooden structure of the caravan behind him. The whole circus shook when he slammed the door, and First winced.

Lease twisted the dial of her [Ring Ring], picking up the call from the other end. "You're on the line with Lease Troupe of the Cheery Traveling Circus! How can I be of assistance?" Lease's voice warped to something sickly sweet, the Neverlander putting up her best impression of a cheery young woman. Lease found it necessary to keep her face up around others; who knew when they would become her playthings?

There was a persistent snickering from the other side as the caller quieted down the other woman on the line. Lease gave the ring a derisive sneer, her frown sliding off-model. If this was another prank call, she would find the owner and personally—

"I'm sorry! I thought I called Amanda of Amusement Box! My mistake. I didn't want to call a second rate circus for my son's birthday…" The laughter on the other end of the call intensified, grating against Lease's psychic defenses and inducing her eye to twitch.

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Second rate? Lease thought to herself, her free fist squeezing hard enough to pop and spill sludge onto the wooden boards of the caravan. "I assure you, the Cheery Traveling Circus is a high quality venue with centuries of experience! We can handle your son's birthday party, no need to change venues! So, when can I set your appointment for?"

"Ah, it's just that my son Tip wants something more modern." The witch on the end of the line chortled. "Your circus, it's fine. Outdated! But servicable. I just want the best for my dear Tip, and you're simply… not."

Oh, so I'm old now? Lease was frustrated, but could tell she was dealing with an expert. Few Neverlanders could cause her insides to twist and roil as this woman could. Forcing her intestines to stop winding into knots, Lease spit out the cheeriest voice she could muster. "Wow! That's amazing. State of the art facilities? I could stand to learn from the Amusement Box. After all, we want the best for poor, forgettable Tip! Do you have their number?"

"Tippetarius? I'm afraid my son's phone number is private, ma'am." Mombi snickered. She couldn't help cracking a joke.

Mombi? I'll kill her. Lease pulled herself together, noticing most of her jester uniform had drifted off-model since she'd bottled up her frustrations. "The Amusement Box, ma'am."

"Oh! Yes, well, if you're going to flatter me so." Lease could hear Mombi gloating from the other end. "I have an address. Just off Melrose and North Campbell in Chicago, that old Riverview amusement park!"

"Riverview! What a blast from the past! I'm so excited to see it!" And level it into a parking lot, Lease mentally added. "Thank you for staying on the line, ma'am. I hope you and your son have a Cheery birthday!"

There was a click as the other end of the line went dead. Lease, ever one to keep grudges, retrieved a journal of petty revenge targets from her desk. Lease turned to the last page, adding Mombi and Tippetarius in gentle, swooping cursive. "Hmm. I should probably add one more." In delicate script, Lease fashioned Amusement Box onto the paper, underlining the entry and adding bright and colorful stars to the page.

"Much better! Time to pack up!"

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