Chapter 336 – Anemone Aroma(6)
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I knocked on Laura’s door, but there was no response.
Announcing my name here might cause Laura to spasm. Shame and guilt are the two biggest emotions that eat away at people’s hearts. Currently, Laura was holding on to both of these emotions at the same time. The name ‘Dantalian’ was the very amalgamation of those emotions clumped together…….
I wordlessly opened the door and was promptly enveloped by shock.
“……, …….”
Laura failed to realize that the door had opened. Her dark, unfocused eyes stared at nothing as she kept muttering to herself endlessly. She was whispering so quietly that I couldn’t make any of her words out. This was a clear sign of a severe mental condition, but that wasn’t the problem right now.
“Laura!”
I ran up to Laura and grabbed her by the wrist. Blood was flowing down her wrist. Laura had been tearing at the spot where her vein is with her nails. I quickly pulled out a potion and poured it on her wrist.
“Lord……?”
Focus returned to Laura’s eyes. However, they were still far off from being clear in any way. Her eyes looked completely dull. The wrist that I had grabbed was also weak like a twig.
I thought she was returning to normal, but I was wrong.
Laura suddenly latched on to my waist and started to cry. She pressed her face strongly against my clothes.
“I’m sorry…… I’m sorry… I’m sorry…… I’m sorry, Lord… I’m sorry…….”
It was at this point that I came to a realization. The indiscernible words that Laura was muttering since the moment I entered her room. She was apologizing to me nonstop.
I felt my hair stand on end as I grabbed her strongly by the shoulders.
“Laura! Laura de Farnese!”
“I’m sorry…… I’m sorry…… I’m sorry…….”
My words didn’t get through to her. I felt a chill go down my spine.
She was having a mental episode and also harming herself. I became keenly aware of how serious the situation was. I optimistically believed that Laura would at least be in a state where I could talk to her. Laura is stronger and shines brighter than anyone else……. That’s why I was optimistic.
I gnashed my teeth. I hardened my heart as I struck Laura’s cheek with a moderate amount of strength. It was only after two to three hits that Laura’s gaze finally went from nothing to me.
“What is with this disgraceful state? Where did the girl who confidently advised me to walk the path of a Demon Lord, the path to hell, back on the Black Mountains vanish to!? Where did the child who immediately tried to bite off her tongue when asked why she had not committed suicide yet disappear to!?”
Laura’s shoulders trembled as she shrunk back.
This reaction made me both sad and angry.
Before reaching the realm of love, would it not be more appropriate to call our relationship close to that of friendship? Not something rotten like love where both sides are shackled to one another, are we not two complete individuals who are able to look toward the same direction together?
“Answer me, Laura. Was all that nothing more than a moment of your childhood? Have our backs folded to the point that you can no longer bear the weight of your pledge!?”
“Ah, ahh…….”
Laura weakly shook her tear-soaked face in denial. She was like a feeble baby bird that couldn’t fly with its own wings and was cowering to hide its body.
I realized something once I saw this.
At a certain point, Laura started to look at me alone.
I saved her from a life as a sex slave. I bestowed upon this girl, who had only resided within a small bubble as an aristocrat, the life of a general. She was sixteen years old back then. I gave her an identity during the time she was most sensitive and unstable.
……I see.
In the original game, Laura had walked the path of a general by herself. She was the one who secured that identity. The difference between an adult and a child is whether their identity was forced upon them or if they secured their identity on their own.
Laura was the same. She shook off her identity as a sex slave and a noble. This was why Laura de Farnese held on to her title as Military Affairs Minister so insistently. However, in this world, I was the one who gave everything to her.
To Laura, I was probably quite literally her owner.
I didn’t think too deeply about this because I believed that she was destined to become a general anyway. I believed that I had only made her fate happen a little sooner. What a fool I was…….
I didn’t save Laura from the fate of becoming a sex slave. I had engraved a different kind of slave seal on her. The original Laura’s body may have been that of a slave, but her mind was still hers. I had taken hold of her mind…….
The decisive trigger was probably when I broke her 99 affection point cap.
Laura had given up on her pride as a noble, but I had returned it to her by gifting her the Farnese family’s flag. I had relieved the resentment she had due to the oppression she experienced as an illegitimate child. Thus, every role she once had and will have in the future came from me.
I am everything to Laura.
There was no meaning to a world without me and a world where I’m injured must be destroyed.
I should’ve noticed sooner.
When Gamigin became obsessed with me and when Ivar gave up completely on her identity……I should’ve realized that the affection point system wasn’t always a good thing.
I ruined her.
The one responsible is clear.
In that case—it’s also clear what I must do.
“Laura.”
I quietly pulled Laura into my arms. Her small body entered my embrace. I erased all the urgency in my voice as I whispered in a gentle tone, making it seem like I would forgive her for everything.
“Lord……?”
Could she instinctually tell that the atmosphere around me had changed? Laura gazed up at me with anxiously trembling eyes. She looked like a delicate animal staring up at its mother. It’s okay. There’s nothing to be afraid of. I gave her a reassuring smile.
“You have done nothing wrong, Laura.”
“You were whipped……because of me…….”
“No.”
I held Laura closer to me.
“I did that despite knowing how much anguish you would feel. But Laura, you are someone whom I cherish the most. I would never hurt you.”
Like how I did with Ivar.
And also with Paimon.
I whispered to Laura gently.
“Then, why……?”
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“Because there are others watching. Laura, you should understand that I unfortunately do not only have a personal side but a public side as well. I had no choice but to punish you because you had violated the law so publicly.”
Like I was chanting a spell.
Like I was chanting a curse.
I uttered sweet, devilish words.
“The problem was how excessively you carried out your torture. Your execution would have been the only way to cover that crime. But I told you, didn’t I? You are someone whom I cherish the most. There is no way I would let you be executed…….”
“A-As I thought, you were whipped because of me!”
“No. It wasn’t because of you, Laura.”
I planted my words in her heart.
The words that she desperately wanted to hear the most.
“It was ‘for’ you, Laura.”
In order to make her pour her heart into raising just these words.
The seed will eat her emotions and eventually bloom, allowing a black flower to blossom over the sacrifice of her original feelings and belief.
“Like how you devote your life to me, it is only natural that I devote my life to you as well. We are of one body and soul, after all. There isn’t anything weird about this……right?”
“Ah…….”
Capturing a weakened girl’s heart is incredibly simple.
My words turned into a rope as Laura latched on to it desperately. She hugged my waist tightly as she cried. Incredibly tightly.
“Everything this young lady does is for your sake…… I do not care about anything as long as you are safe!”
“That’s right, Laura. The bond holding us together is on a different level compared to the masses throughout the world. Your life is mine and my life is yours.”
“Yes, Lord……Yes……!”
I stroked my fingers through Laura’s hair as if I were combing it.
Laura.
If the reason you were consumed by your emotions was because of your love for me,
if the culprit who had given you that love is none other than me,
then I would gladly shoulder all that you have. Be it your belief and will, Laura de Farnese, I will shoulder everything that you consist of from start to finish.
You don’t have to apologize for anything you do in the future. You don’t have to blame yourself or even take responsibility. You have left everything to me, after all.
Your crimes, regrets, and mistakes, I will take them all in your stead.
“Then let us make a contract, Laura. Vow that you will entrust your belief with me.”
I pressed my lips against Laura’s pale forehead. There were tears welling up around her eyes.
“A contract……?”
“From now on, you must find all meaning from me. You are my sword. You must follow my orders. Slaughter and slay my enemies if I order you to do so. For my sake.”
I wiped her tears away with my finger. Even her crying face was beautiful. She most likely hasn’t been able to wash for several days, but even that wasn’t able to ruin Laura’s natural beauty.
“In return, I will give you love.”
“Lord…….”
“Eternal love. A love that no doubt can possibly approach.”
Laura gazed at me with hazy eyes.
She opened her mouth without a moment of hesitation.
“Yes, Lord……I swear! I swear that I will only use my life for your sake! If you do not want something, then this young lady will not want it as well. If you do not give me an order, then this young lady will not order herself either!”
“I am delighted to hear that.”
I smiled brightly.
That’s right.
People have to take complete responsibility for the things they do.
Wordplays like pretense and lies have little weight to them. An action is done and thus responsibility must follow. Before this absolute obligation, everything else becomes light.
If you don’t have the resolve to take responsibility until the very end, then you shouldn’t have started to begin with.
I have to stick firmly with the things I’ve started.
“As I thought, I only have Laura. If it were not for you, then I would already be dead. I do not fear Elizabeth or Henrietta. I only need you, Laura.”
Laura’s face lit up brightly.
I jokingly flicked Laura’s forehead.
“But Laura, you are only competent in military affairs. You earnestly require the help of others. For example, Lapis has skills that you do not. You understand this, right?”
“Yes……The people you need are the people I need as well.”
“Indeed. For the sake of our eternal love.”
Laura’s breathing became noticeably stable. It felt like all the tears she shed had soaked into my clothes.
Now, for the final nail.
“So please do not punish others thoughtlessly. You must not get jealous either. This will only make me sad……. You should be able to endure as long as you remember that you are my number one.”
“Okay, Lord. I swear.”
Laura smiled.
Her smile was as beautiful as a blooming cherry blossom.
Ahh. I love you, Laura.
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—I truly did love you.
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