Chapter 15: Chapter 15

 

Mum sits in front of me, carefully studying my new appearance.
I don't think I need to mention how uneasy I feel about this.
And how much I have to concentrate to keep this "uneasiness" in check.

 

"Okay. What are we dealing with? A tail, animalistic legs, strangely deformed hands, horns, your eyes, somewhat elongated ears, and a common theme of black." (S)

"What?!" (I)

 

I grab for my ears and they are indeed longer.
And stiff.
A little bit like I'd suppose elf ears to be.

 

"When did that happen?!" (I)

"So you don't have a concrete track on this. First things first. What do you know? Your friend was rather explicit with this demonic goddess thing. Can you tell me something about that?" (S)

"She, she isn't my friend. I just met her today! And, and I really don't know anything! It was just too much for me." (I)

"So you don't know. Any ideas how... Sorry. God, this calmth feels really strange. Can you tell me what your friend did there?" (S)

"She isn't..." (I)

"Fine, she isn't your friend. But do you know what she did?" (S)

"She can play tricks on one's mind. Control them somehow. I don't really know how that works. But, but I don't think she did that to you with evil intent. It, it should wear off on its own." (I)

"Good to know. Then to the bigger issues. At least, what do you remember that put you in such a state?" (S)

"The dream." (I)

"Dream? You mean that one you wanted to tell me about? What is with this?" (S)

"I was told that dreams can have more meaning than one might think." (I)

"That means they are... prophetic?" (S)

"That means they are real!" (I)

"So what about this "real" dream?" (S)

"It-it was a bad place! And... bad things happened there to me. I started to change there and... and after I woke up I looked like this." (I)

"So it's just since this morning like this?" (S)

"Yes, do you remember this black stuff on my face? This was some kind of residue." (I)

"Oh Iori..." (S)

 

And like this, she starts to hug me.
An eye opens sideways on my head with which I notice that she's crying.

 

"That you would keep quiet about something like this. I'm your mother! You... You can come to me when you're troubled!" (S)

"I'm... Hick! I'm so sorry! Hick! I didn't want to. When I woke up this morning I just... panicked! And I was completely through with what happened in this dream. I couldn't stand a talk. Wouldn't have known what to say! Please, I'm sorry!" (I)

 

I feel her carefully stroking my back.

 

"So, are you from now on going to look like this?" (S)

"N-no, I think I can... turn back to normal again. I just... I can't focus enough and my body is troubled right now. Forgive me, I can't change it instantly." (I)

"It's fine, it's fine! You don't look too bad. Just... please don't get me wrong. I believe as soon this... calmth will wear off I might get a small panic attack. This has nothing to do with you! Just the situation. I still love you!" (S)

"O-okay..." (I)

"Really, I do! You don't need to worry!" (S)

"Thank you!" (I)

 

My eyes are still teary but I can manage to keep the liquid inside.
This black ink is too vile to let it out.

 

"Alright. As long I can still think straight I have some questions. Who was now this girl, that appeared out of nowhere in our home and burns intricate patterns into other people's floors?" (S)

"She... She is a demon!" (I)

"A demon?" (S)

"Well, I think so. She goes to my school. I only know that she feeds on people's negative emotions. This is honestly all I know. I just interacted with her today. Apparently, she could somehow notice my condition and like this acted a little conspicuously." (I)

"She goes to your school?" (I)

"Y-yes. As an exchange student under the name Karin Caspers. Her real name is Zika... Oh no! She will get angry! Names have a special meaning and she doesn't like it if one uses hers!" (I)

"Anything else that would be important?" (S)

"The town is full of ghosts and I always have eyes plopping up around me! And my body is acting like having a life of its own! And strange things happen! And I'm... I'm spent." (I)

"Fine, I know that nothing of this is your fault and you aren't bad. It's just a very, very problematic situation. Are you still fine? I know what you told me, but how do you feel, physically?" (S)

"It's alright I guess. I don't feel tired anymore. There is no real physical discomfort right now. But this makes it worse in some way. That it does feel so natural." (I)

"There is no problem. As long you are healthy this is all that matters. Just don't strain yourself too much." (S)

 

There is a glance back to the bathroom.

 

"God! Sorry, but I don't know what to do with this. It is unsettling that these... things in there seem to move on their own. Calling an exterminator might become a problem." (S)

"I think... I think I can do something about this." (I)

 

My voice is still totally meek.

 

"Only if you're okay with it. I won't force you. If it's necessary I will find a solution!" (S)

"No, no. I can do this!" (I)

 

I stand up, balancing on my beast feet.
The sudden change between them makes adjusting a little harder.
Wobbly I go to the bathroom door.

 

"Iori if..." (S)

"It's fine, I'm just not this used to my legs." (I)

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Like before with the ink-water, I try to think about willing the tentacles back into me.
As soon I grab them they do exactly that.
It is a completely unnerving sight, seeing all this fleshy stuff in there getting pulled along the lines which lead me.
Even the remaining hull of mine in the tub is affected and gets absorbed.

What is really distressing is that I believe the tentacles did grow a bit after I've left the room.
This would mean they could spread on their own around if I don't pay attention.
Zika is right!
I'm truly dangerous!

 

"I won't lie. This looks unsettling. But are you okay?" (S)

"Yes, this isn't bad for me." (I)

"Is there something else I should know? Something that is important about your... condition?" (S)

"Umh, Zika said I need to be careful about imagining things. They might become real." (I)

"God! I'm sorry dear, but your mother really doesn't know how to handle this. I guess I lack the expertise." (S)

"I'm rather sure no one would know." (I)

"As long as you tell me you are going to be alright..." (S)

"I think I will. But I... I'm terribly scared that I could hurt someone. Zika always tells me how I could destroy this city, or worse. I don't want this! I don't want any of this!" (I)

"As long you don't want surely nothing will happen. But if you are this troubled... Do you maybe want to stay home tomorrow? I can call the school for you." (S)

"No. I wouldn't want that. I just wish that everything goes back to normal." (I)

"Good, I understand. But do you think you will be able to manage? I mean if you go like this there might be a commotion." (S)

"I think, I can turn back. I'm just... my body gets troubled with all this absorbing and it is too  disturbed right now to really listen." (I)

"If you say so. But maybe you should rest a bit. You don't look very well. On the other side, I don't know how you're supposed to look." (S)

"I'm a little scared to sleep. I don't know what will happen if I do. You-you know, because of the dreams." (I)

"Hm, then we need to make sure that you have good dreams." (S)

"Sorry, but I was constantly confronted with horrific abominations and then this happened to me. I don't believe my sleep will be peaceful." (I)

"Don't worry, I have an idea. Make yourself ready for the bed." (S)

 

Still having mother's commanding tone from before in my far too large ears I hurry.
And I can't stop touching them as weird they feel.

I soon have my pajama on.
Like a caricature.
I mean, in comparison to all these other creatures I don't think my looks would count as horrific, if not for my eyes.
Yet seeing me like this in my sleeping clothes is totally weird.
While I don't think it's necessary I still brush my teeth.
I am especially careful with spitting out.
For some reason, I believe I achieve to filter everything nightmarish out of the mix.

 

I want to tell my mother that I'm ready and go to her room.
But when I open the door I see that she's crying.

She holds her head and quietly small droplets fall down.
Maybe the spell did wear off or she was just putting a strong front for me.
Guilt builds up in my chest, but I can't bring myself to enter the room.
It feels as if this would just make everything worse.
So I instead walk quietly back to my room.

 

I feel rather down now and decide to lie quietly on the bed.
Right now transforming back might be possible if I force it. Still, I can feel how unsettled my insides are and that it would be extremely difficult.

Also at the moment, it wouldn't really help.
Mum has already seen me and trying to act like there is nothing appears so pointless to me.
Mum shows up after a while.
I rise back up from the bed.
Didn't dare to sleep.

 

"Hey, my little girl! You look cute in this attire." (S)

"Isn't it weird? I think I look out of place." (I)

"There is a certain disparity, but this has its own charm!" (S)

"Uhum. Sorry for all this trouble." (I)

 

I feel so bad that she needs to go through that because of me.

 

"I am absolutely sure you aren't to blame for this. You are a good girl, Iori!" (S)

"Thank you, mum. Maybe... Maybe if I really try I could form back now." (I)

"It's fine. You don't need to push yourself!" (S)

"What? Are you sure? I, I could surely manage!" (I)

"It's straining for you right?" (S)

"Uhm, only a little bit. Just a small drain. Nothing really hard." (I)

"I want you to feel at ease now. You can show me what you want. I won't condemn you for this. Just... no more secrets please!" (S)

"I-If you want." (I)

"Good. Then go to bed now." (S)

"I'm not sure about this mum. Bad things could happen." (I)

"While I don't know about this, I am sure that it won't do you any good if you stay active without any rest. So please lie down now!" (S)

"Are you sure?" (I)

"Please do!" (S)

 

Without further discussion, I lay down and pull the sheet to hide as much of me as possible.
I don't want to disturb mum anymore with these disturbing eyes of mine and lie so that my look is directed in the other direction.
And the tail prevents any different posture.

But then it happens.
Suddenly I feel a touch from behind and a shift in the weight on the bed.
Immediately an eye opens up behind me.
I see mum!

 

"M-mum?" (I)

"Yes?" (S)

 

She looks uncertain, not completely convinced what she is doing there.

 

"What-wha..." (I)

"While you are maybe a little bit too old to share a bed with your mother, that doesn't mean I can!t spoil you at times. If you are scared and feel down you can still rely on me. So let me make you feel safe!" (S)

I cannot answer.
My mind went blank.
She lies there.
She really lies there!

This... This is...
I start to tear up!
Mum loves me this much!
To come this close even if I look like this!

I feel her hand slightly touching my back.
This means so much to me!

I feel at ease.
Like this, I might be able to rest.
Like this, I might find peace.

 

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