Chapter 67: Chapter 67

 

Okay, I need to do this now.
I move as close I can.

 

"Ehm, please, whatever creepy instinct governs my actions. I need a bit of help here. It would be great if you could help me make a connection." (I)

 

I don't even know if there's anyone concrete I'm addressing.
I just extend my hands in that poor girl's direction and hope that something will happen to make this connection.
And to my surprise, it does.
Abruptly tendrils extend from my arm's skin and reach towards her.
Usually, I'd be creeped out, but this time I need to prevail as it's a necessary thing to happen.
They close in and disturbingly touch her head.
Then they pierce inside.

 

"Gaaaahhh!" (Y)

 

They're stuck now in her temples, ears, and nose, slowly crawling further, growing more connections.
Some very small ones creep towards her eyes and then around her eyeballs inside.
The worst is that I feel every little bit of this process.
Sometimes I really ask myself how I managed to still be sane, as I'm sure that what I continuously experience is something that can totally make someone go crazy.

Chiaki almost loses her breakfast and I as well only don't cancel everything and rip myself away because I know that I have to do something and maybe because it might be unhealthy to yank now that I have so many anchor points at very delicate places.
The only thing I can do now is to proceed so that this can soon come to an end.
So I need a connection.

Suddenly something happens.
I feel how a part of my awareness drifts along the created strands into the girl.
I'm still somehow aware of my own body, but at the same time, I experience something completely foreign.
I've just developed a new sense and now do something akin to touching that girl's essence.
I don't know if "touching" is the right word, as it's not physical.
At the same time, it feels somewhat familiar.
As if my instincts are guiding me.

I realize that this particular feeling is exactly what I need and follow up on the instructions.
Still, the main problem remains that I don't know in the slightest what I'm doing here.
Especially not what exactly is the problem and how to fix it.
Also, I am not in the best state of mind as I'm more than a little sad about what happened.
I never intended to harm someone.
The thought that she remains in this delirium forever weighs heavily on my conscience.
Her parents and friends will have to accept that she is in this state, which isn't too far away from death.
And because of this, I cannot accept this.
I don't want to live with this guilt.
And so I demand this knowledge.

At this moment it's as if my eyes open a second time.
Suddenly I understand what is wrong.
The soul is incorporeal so I cannot refer to anything concrete, but what is certain is that hers is in disarray.
Not only shaken but completely out of balance.
Almost like it got poled the wrong way.
As if something pressed for so long against its structure till the whole thing bend and now threatens to collapse.
Or it already did so.

 

And as sudden as this completely novel insight came I also know the solution.
With incorporeal sews and needles, I fix up the dented patches.
With imaginary pressure, I reposition the whole thing.
And with some kind of soul concrete, I refill the structures which lacked density to support the whole thing.
While I'm doing so, I'm more and more immersing myself in the process.
Which is terribly necessary, as I would otherwise concentrate on my patient's disturbing outer reactions to my treatment.
Which might be close to an exorcism of the really bad, horror film kind.

However, I'm definitely making progress.
There's but one problem.
Inside what I think is her soul I notice, for the lack of a better impression, black structures.
They're like tumorous growth, or not?
While not growing they threaten to clash with the rest and cause severe instability.

From fiddling with them I learn that I could try removing them.
But this would probably lead to even greater chaos than what I'm trying to solve right now.
Like this, there's no viable short-term solution.

But then I promptly get another inspiration.
I know that if I'm really trying, could extract the black parts and after this carefully rebuild everything that collapsed.
However, my goal is to make this procedure as noninvasive as possible.
So the best thing I could do would be to purify the blackness.
The problem is, that I'm not capable of purifying anything at all.
It's simply not my element.
However, someone who has this affinity is present.

 

"Chiaki, I need your help." (I)

 

She needs some time to catch up to this, for maybe the same reason why she backed so far away.
After all, from the outside perspective, I just did unspeakable things to this girl.

 

"Wh-what do you need?" (C)

"Your light. As Zika said, I need your sunshine to make her feel better." (I)

 

Fortunately, it's not too hard to convince Chiaki to help other people.
So she, even if slightly reluctant, comes to me.

 

"And what now?" (C)

 

Fortunately, my "inspiration" instructed me about this as well.
And yes, I know that I'm bordering here on what this term originally is about and should probably be much more vigilant.
Which I would be if I wouldn't be so desperate here.

 

"Put your hand on my arm and gather some energy as if you're trying to shoot a beam, but without really getting started." (I)

Soon I feel the mentioned energy.
Tiniest tendrils, thinner than spiderwebs reach inside Chiaki's arm to form a connection. And like along a cable the energy gets transported into the girl.
All I have to do is to guide it to the respective areas.
And like intended the energy makes short work of the black.
Even better, the cleansed parts maintain their integrity, so that the whole structure survives and stays stable.
It takes quite some time but eventually, I can finish and call this surgery a success.

Slowly and carefully I peel the tentacles away, especially those around the eyes.
I wouldn't want to rip them out.
When the last connection separates, I feel a strange sense of accomplishment.

 

"I've done it! I've restored her self!" (I)

 

Now I just need to get out of here.

When I'm again completely back in my body I take some time to gather myself and then take in the environment.
Foremost naturally the outer appearance of my patient.
She's at least now breathing much calmer and stopped mumbling.
Yet that could as well mean that I made it worse.
I try not to think about this any further and instead focus on the less dire cases.
At least I thought they were less dire, but now that Zika is done with them the pitiful rests she left behind concern me.
The boy with the golden aura and the girl seem to be somewhat fine.
Well, not really, as they're lying totally slumped on the ground because of absolute exhaustion like after a week-long marathon.

And the other boy with the glasses looks comatose.

 

"Are, are they alright?" (I)

"Yes. That thing at least knows when to stop. Those light cases might wake up any moment." (So)

 

Zika grimaces at the goddess while I look really worried at the glasses boy.
I can barely see any aura around him now.

 

"Will he really be alright?" (I)

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"Yep, had to absorb quite much but as long his mind won't receive another blow he'll be fine. I need to say, that cocktail of despair and half-eternal suffering was great to ingest. At least, there's one upside in working for you." (Z)

 

As long the parasitic demon is happy...

 

"This means they'll recover?" (I)

"It's a bit difficult to explain. Yes, we were able to extract the associated feelings with the torture. When they will reminisce about what happened, it will be for them as if it happened to someone else. Theoretically, this should prevent a deeper trauma. But that doesn't mean they will be exactly fine. Even the objective memory of what happened without any personal involvement can cause distress. It's like watching a horror film with you as one of the victims and you know it's based on a true story. Not too great of an image." (Z)

"What the leech said." (So)

"Oh please, that's the pot calling the kettle black. You're just a rampant idea that lost all its support! Different to me with all my arrangements you will eventually stop persisting. So could you please stop displaying your disdain for even one single moment?" (Z)

 

I need to take Zika's side.
Soraja is pretty much a racist here.
And I don't just say this because I'm part of the targeted group.
On the other hand, she might have said too much.
So I have to step in before this goddess vaporizes her.

 

"Zika really helped here and was supportive. So could you please overlook this one single time that she's part of a, by you not favored group?" (I)

"Such an understatement!" (So)

"Anyway, what about the girl? Does, does it work out? I really did my best there." (I)

 

I look anxiously back to the place where she's lying.
Chiaki is still at her side, checking if she's at least physically okay.
Soraja goes over and again does her glowing hand thing.
She seems to be in thought.

 

"Mmh. A bit rough. Some points probably would've worked with a less grave intrusion. But all in all far better than anticipated and certainly much preferable to the earlier state." (So)

"So she'll be fine?" (I)

"Don't get me wrong. In general, this was an atrocity against the most fundamental laws of balance and everything that's good and just. But it's probably still better than you destroying existence itself because you grieve that you couldn't save her." (So)

 

I try to act as if I didn't hear that and repeat my question.

 

"So she'll be fine?" (I)

"No. You messed with her soul and should never forget about this. What you've done is irreversible. As minor it is, every little change is a difference from the person that she was before. And this is something no one should be able to decide about. So no, she's not fine. A part of her is gone and won't ever return. But if you're asking me if what you patched up there will work out to exist as another mortal, yes it may. I can't tell what the exact implications are, but she will be able to continue living, and as far I can tell with a good part of her old self still intact." (So)

 

Naturally, I feel terrible.
I never wanted to influence her personality.
I never wanted to harm her.
I just wanted not to be involved.
And this really hurts.

 

"I wouldn't fret about this. Souls change all the time. Every little experience defines someone's personality in the end. And this personality defines the soul. Yes, usually a single life, no matter how extreme it was, would only add another nuance and not cause a fundamental change, but the basic principle is still quite similar. So you shouldn't scare our little outer god too much. As long she's not misusing it to create eternal slaves or twisted beings, tortured by their own existence, there's no reason to call any overseers, right? Aside from the fact that the implications, if you'd do so, would be "worrisome"." (Z)

 

The way she said that last part makes me believe that her concerns go a bit past a universal apocalypse.
However, contrary to her nature Zika manged to make me feel better.
If souls really are prone to change then this tiny bit I did there, with best intentions to help, cannot be considered too bad.
Just equal to the accumulated changes of two to three lives.

 

"Thank you, Zika!" (I)

 

It's not like me, but I embrace her.

 

"Wh-wha-what!? Stop! No! Just no!" (Z)

"Oh, what a chance! I want too!" (C)

 

And Chiaki joins in our sandwich.
Which I might have secured with some tentacles to prevent her from slipping.
The goddess meanwhile gives us an incredulous look.

 

"I... I guess this is just like you. Fine. I'll take my leave then. As much as I love you, nothing can bring me to touch this thing." (So)

"Just kill me. Please!" (Z)

 

Maybe I should stop before the demon does something regrettable.
While I'm pulling the tentacles away I notice a golden light shining.
When I turn around the goddess is gone.
And when I look the other way again the same goes for Zika, and only some smoldering embers on the ground mark her last position.
Maybe I should leave that shy maiden some time for herself.
She might be good at dealing with people, but regarding friendship, she's just starting out.
The one issue I have with her sudden leave is the following.

How do I deal now with those four kiddos of whom two already start to stir?

 

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