Chapter 37: Chapter Thirty-Five: By Merdrek’s You-Know, What a Bunch of Pricks

            As their galley headed toward a pier, Leo gazed at the Lakusi. Its port teemed with activity, a healthy bustle that told a discerning eye it was growing and prospering. Fishermen unloaded, people cried out their wares from stands, and furious bargaining occurred. A few soldiers patrolled the streets, but they were greeted with waves and jokes, signs that the city guard was respected and liked, not feared.

Leo had a lot of hope for his time in the city—it seemed a reasonable place at first glance.

Beside him, Lily had a slight hunch to her shoulders which told him she was stressed. She wore beautiful clothing—in illusions, Leo suspected. But to his eyes, she was dressed in a leaf-green dress that hugged her bodice and flared out around her feet, with a large collection of silver and emerald jewelry, and her usual diadem. The stitching on the dress was different than usual, and when he’d asked, she’d explained that the stitching told others in the Havi Imperium that she was noble.

But Lily had grown more and more tense as they approached the city over the last few days. Leo hadn’t been able to figure out exactly why, but he guessed her status as an outcast noble had been awkward for her.

Hugh, by contrast, was carefree and had already jumped over the side. He was swimming along the boat, occasionally making jokes to the rowers. Zir was staring, wide-eyed, at the city, his solid shadow giving an even darker cast to his already dark gray adventuring gear.

The city was impressive, about twice as large as Steelport, but it had nothing on the hives of human activity that San Francisco and Los Angeles had been. Or anything on the ruins of Calasti, really.

Zir, however, hadn’t seen anything larger than a Blood Tribe war camp, so Leo figured this many people together in one place was blowing his little mind.

            Captain Whitewater directed her ship to the dock, where they tied it off. Leo, Lily, Zir, and two elves who were fulfilling the role of ladies-in-waiting all walked down the plank. Leo paid the shockingly fat dockmaster who held his hand out at the bottom of the plank the use fee, a few silver coins.

            “So, what’s first?” Leo asked as Hugh lunged out of the water, grabbed the pier, and pulled himself up next to them.

            Leo lazily dodged the expected, and almost perfunctory, water-spit from Hugh.

            “We need to go apply to see the King of Lakusi, and then we should go see my mother. She’ll have a place for us to stay while we wait for our audience.”

            “Sounds like a plan.”

            “Ooh,” Hugh said. “We’ll get to meet a real king. I wonder how he’ll stack up against the discount model we have.”

            “Ass,” Leo said affectionately, reaching out and scratching Hugh’s eye ridge.

            Hugh batted Leo’s hand away after a moment. “All right, enough of your sentimentality. Let’s go get the dumb political stuff out of the way so we can recruit some awesome new dragons for my new lair complex.”

            “They should call you ‘the friendly dragon,’” Lily said. “Dragons don’t normally lair together—it’s rare even for younger ones, although I admit, not unheard of.”

            “They should call him the friendly drunk,” Zir said, reaching over and slapping Hugh hard on his haunch.

            As Hugh snorted, Zir shook his hand out.

Leo almost laughed at Zir. Hugh now had an armor rating as high as plate mail, and the Toughness of a small car. Unlike Leo, Zir didn’t regularly spar with Hugh and hadn’t quite experienced what trying to deal with the dragon was like.

The group wandered through the city. It was quite lovely for a medieval city, with window boxes planted with nice flowers, small personal gardens, and people who smiled and waved. Its houses were small and wooden for the most part, which spoke to the general wealth of the area—and the fact it bordered the Forest of Averia to the north.

Leo had been surprised at how small many of the houses in his own realm were, but he’d learned that the maintenance and repair costs were high enough that any large dwelling was a huge drain on time and resources. Although the use of magic, including the basic hardening ability that didn’t require crystals, made the situation better than it would have been for a normal medieval peasant. But except for the richest of the farm families, everyone had pretty much adopted a two-room dwelling—one big front room that was a combination kitchen, dining room, and living room, and one large back room that acted as the communal bedroom. And an outhouse designed for the recovery of night soil for, well, soil.

It wasn’t very different here in the Havi Imperium, although the smells told Leo they still used the ‘throw it onto the road and wait for the rain to wash it into the lake’ method here, and not outhouses.

Leo’s idle thoughts were interrupted when Lily laid her hand on his forearm and pointed to the fourth or fifth black banner that they’d passed.

“Someone important died,” Lily muttered.

Leo had no idea who it might have been, so he simply nodded to her words and kept walking.

They reached the palace after about twenty minutes walking through the city. It was impressive, with stone walls and towers, and glowing spires on the tops to hold pennants of the realm decorated with a stylized dragon in a lake. But it paled in comparison to the royal castle in the ruins of Calasti.

A second outer wall of the castle was under construction, as was a huge garden and pond combination in the front of the castle. Rituals were being laid out across large parts of it. The rituals were using aquamarine and emerald crystals of magic.

“Water and Wyld crystals,” Lily said, without being prompted. “And those are clearly water movement and purity rituals, and growth rituals for the Wyld magic portion. Fairly expensive ones. This entire garden complex probably cost thousands of gold to create, or will by the time it’s done, and costs tens more every single year to keep it going. This seems a bit rich for the king, but I suppose he’s earned it over his nearly fifty-year reign, one that’s seen the city of Lakusi, and the Havi Imperium in general, carefully shepherded to a decent height after they got hit during the dragonflight as well.”

She sniffed. “Far short of Averia, of course, but still.”

“What if the king is the dead guy?” Leo asked. “What’s his son like?”

“His son, Jason Haviden III, is a good man, although perhaps a bit indolent. He isn’t the worker his father is, nor is he quite as smart, but he’s still a good ruler and has a real knack for finding the best person for the job, whatever job that may be. He’s held quite a few positions under his father, and done well, if not amazingly, at all of them. A solid administrator, if not exactly inspired at anything.”

            “Good, I was worried for a moment that this excess was a sign of new management.”

            As they were talking, they reached the front of the main keep to the palace. Two guards, both in polished and gleaming half-plate, stood with halberds ready and swords at their belts.

            “Who’re you?” the left one asked. His glower was a near match for his fellow guard’s, and through the helm, Leo could only see men in their thirties with brown hair and brown eyes. Lacking anything else to distinguish them, Leo designated them “Lefty” and “Righty” in his own mind—he got the impression they weren’t going to be doing friendly introductions.

            Lily held her head up proudly. “I am Lilianae ap Willowynd, Duchess of Averia. I am formally requesting a meeting with the king, as is my privilege as a noble.”

            Righty took over the sneer-and-smear. “Hardly, slavey. King Damien has decreed that all titles belonging to the lost Kingdom of Averia are forfeit under his reign. You have no standing here, and no right to seek the king’s presence. Begone.”

            “King… Damien?” Lily asked, shocked. “What happened to King Jason Haviden III? Or his son, the fourth?”

            “The crown prince and his father disappeared on a hunt, just before King Jason Haviden II passed.” The guard paused. “How do you not know this? It was in the mouth of all the town criers for a fortnight.”

            Lily flipped her hair back. “I was out restoring the lost Kingdom of Averia, which has risen again.”

            Technically true, but boy, is she stretching the definition of ‘rose again,’ Leo thought to himself, choking back his giggle at the degree to which she stretched the facts.

            “Horseshit, elf. Now get out of here.”

            Before Lily could respond, Zir stepped forward. “I’m Zirvyl Xolterra ap Veltear, Archduke of Veltear now that my father has passed. I demand entry as my noble privilege.”

            “What’s the Archduchy of Veltear?” Righty asked.

            “Just another lost elven land,” Lefty answered.

            Righty chuckled. “Then fuck this slavey as well.”

            Zir launched himself at Righty, a steel stiletto, lengthened by hardened shadow, in his hand, aimed at the gaps in the helm that covered the guard’s face.

            But Leo had seen it coming. He managed to grab Zir’s arm before he could make contact. He lifted him from the ground and pushed him back before Zir’s other attacks could strike the guard.

            “I’ll fucking kill you, you piece of human filth!” Zir raged at the guard, then he turned to Leo. “Put me down!”

            “That’s assault on a serving royal guardsman!” Righty bellowed, his face pale. “That’s a capital offense!”

            Leo turned, his own free left hand crossing to grasp the hilt of his sword.

            “Zir here is Level Six, and he’s the lowest of us by a decent margin. You saw his magic. You’ve made your position clear—we’ll leave. And I’m sorry for my friend. If, however, you try to harm Zir, you’ll both die, and your kingdom will have a war.”

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            “And I’ll eat one of you,” Hugh said nonchalantly. “You’re still worth a tiny bit of experience to me. And I’ve never actually managed to eat a mortal yet who wasn’t a goblin. I kinda wanna sample you.”

            They both went paler.

            “Who’re you?” Lefty asked Leo. “How can you make that threat?”

            “I’m Leonard Emmanuel ap Evans il Stardew, King of the reborn Kingdom of Averia, and I was here to negotiate trade deals for the use of the Blue River, as well as dockage at my port of currently over a thousand that sits the mouth of the river on Elgin Isle, now that ‘Old Chao’ is gone. We’re not nobles of a lost kingdom, we’re most of the ruling council of a new one.”

            Lefty and Righty exchanged glances, and then Righty raised an eyebrow.

That must have meant something to Lefty, who gave a single jut of his chin to Leo. “Well, where’ll you be staying? I’ll see if the king wants to see you and let you know.”

            “We’ll be at the Willowynd Manse.”

***

            The trudge back through the city was basically one long rant from Zir. “You should’ve let me stab him. No one would miss one idiot uppy guard. Seriously, I think his own wife woulda been happy to see him go. What an absolute churl.”

            “Calm down,” Leo said. “You’re gonna bust a gasket.”

            “The hell?”

            “Who cares about the guard?” Leo dramatically roll of his eyes. “He’s gonna have to clean out his armor after you nearly removed his eye and then a dragon threatened to eat him. Not an idle threat in this world. That’s enough punishment for denying your title, right? Being a Karen isn’t a death sentence, for fuck’s sake.”

            “Being a Karen?” Lily asked, her brow furrowed.

            Zir grimaced and made slashing motions with one of his knives, which appeared in his hand as if by magic, and he made slashing motions through the air. “It should be a capital offense to challenge my authority. Especially for a human.”

            “Might wanna leave off the humans, Zir,” Lily said, glancing up at Leo before looking away.

            Zir snorted. “Why? They’re trash, except for their damnable ridiculous heroes, and everyone knows it.”

            “Sshhh!” Lily slapped at the back of Zir’s head—though the younger elf ducked without looking—and then putting her finger to her lips like a librarian.

            “It’s fine, truly,” Leo said. “My state of being is hyper complicated, and I learn from people’s prejudices.”

            By now, most of Zir’s anger seemed to have been replaced by confusion as he glanced back and forth between Leo and Lily. “What’re you guys going on about?”

            Hugh, however, already knew about Leo and wasn’t interested. So he started stuff again. “I’m with the kid. We shoulda sampled them at least, as an experiment, to see how they tasted.”

            “Yeah!” Zir did a front flip and then threw his knife into a wooden lamp pole.

            Leo grabbed Zir by the back of his shirt. “All right, I draw the line at hurling cutlery around metropolitan areas. A bit less insanity, all right?”

            “Sure, whatever you say, killjoy.”

            “Sometimes,” Hugh said, glancing up slyly at Leo.

            When Leo pointedly didn’t react, Hugh sighed heavily. “So boring.”

            “We’re here,” Lily said a few minutes later, pointing ahead to a wooden manse surrounded by a small garden. It looked to have ten to fifteen rooms, a very large amount by the standards of the era and area.  But it looked like its owners had disappeared months ago. Weeds had choked out the last struggling flowers in the garden beds, and ivy swarmed up the outer walls—maybe the only thing that held the place together, considering the cracks in the walls.

            The art style was clearly Averian, featuring statues of prominent figures in dramatic and powerful poses, including a large marble statue near the entrance that resembled the king Leo had spoken to outside the vault—although it was half-covered in ivy as well.

            Leo walked up to the door of the manse, the others beside him, and knocked.

            “It’s my home,” Lily said irritably, and she took the huge door handle, pressing down and in.

            It didn’t budge.

            Lily’s dress had no pockets, but she reached down, and the dress shimmered for a second—the illusion dealing with reality at some level, Leo figured. Lily withdrew her hand and pushed a small key into the door lock. Before she finished, however, the door opened to the inside.

            An older-looking elf, appearing to be in his late fifties, stood there in the green and white livery of Averia, carrying a sword in his right hand.

            “May I help… Lilinae!” the man said, his voice going from frosty to shocked in a moment. “You live!”

            “I live,” she said, smiling. “Hello again, Hythaeran.”

            The man sheathed his sword, and then, his blue eyes wet, limped forward and hugged Lily tight. “Welcome home, milady. When you didn’t return, we feared the worst.”

            “Why didn’t you use magic to locate me or talk to me?”

            Hythaeran stepped back and twisted his finger in his golden-gray hair—a gesture quite reminiscent of Lily’s. “You can see for yourself, milady. When King Damien ascended the throne, he declared our titles forfeit, and our protections from taxation similarly forfeit—and he backdated the order to when we showed up, fifty years ago, during his grandfather’s reign. We’re bankrupt. He declared, in his mercy he said, that he’d exempt the land we lived on, and house we lived in, from the tax. But he said we still had to pay the taxes from before going forward as well. Truthfully, we can’t afford to maintain our demesne here and will have it sell it regardless.”

            Lily’s face had been going whiter and whiter, with red spots high on her cheeks. “That’s an outrage!”

            Hy nodded, sadly. “Damien needed to pay for his new projects, expansions of the palace and his armies both, and didn’t want to upset most of his subjects. The elven refugees have never been popular here, you know that.”

            “An outrage! This is beyond all proper usage of nobles between realms.”

            She turned to Leo and angrily tossed her hair over her shoulder. “Once we are established, Leo, I demand that you act to rectify this situation. The king here has no right to use his nobles, even those who are guests, as he did. It’s an ex post facto law, for the god’s sake! He basically just seized the goods of unpopular members of his kingdom!”

            “I’m so sorry.” Leo placed his arm over Lily’s shoulders. “In truth, however, this works out for us.”

            “How?” Lily demanded, her brow furrowed. “How can this mistreatment possibly work for us?”

            “It encourages those who fled Averia to return,” Leo said. “I suspect we’ll have an excellent immigration rate, and it’ll be people who already speak Middle Averian and will be sympathetic to our cause over the next few years. We’ll grow long-term as the benefit of King Damien’s short-term greed.”

            Lily calmed and nodded thoughtfully. “It still upsets me, greatly, how Damien has treated us. But what you say has merit. I suppose having our own kingdom grow is the only ultimate solution, and this will force even those foolish elves who claimed our kingdom was dead to come back now. Your words have a certain wisdom.”

            Then her eyes narrowed again. “Although, we shouldn’t give an inch in any mercantile negotiations, nor should we come to his aid without great concessions.”

            “Fair,” Leo said. “We’ll remember who he is—and treat him accordingly.”

            “But for now,” Hythaeran said, “let’s get inside, have a bottle of twenty-two hard cider, and you can say hello to your mother again, and tell us everything that’s happened.”

            Lily’s shoulders bunched again, and Leo suddenly understood what she was upset about—what had been bothering her this whole trip. I forgot, but everyone else who went with lily to recover the Calasti vault died. All the people she left with, except for herself, are dead now. She has to tell people who knew and cared for them about that, and she isn’t looking forward to it. Including, most likely, people who would have been her future in-laws.

            I hope her mother at least is a great woman

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