Endless Thirst: Above 3 (2/2)

OCTOBER 10, 2022 ~ CTRLDEVIL

Kiriko slumped on the couch in a state of dejection. He tossed the bag wildly on the table. The anxiolytic drugs did nothing to ease his stupor.
He shoved her coffee aside – and again flung the contents of the bag down. The packets made a rustling sound. Coffee dripped from the edge of the table onto the carpet. She closed her eyes tightly. Crow’s feet were clearly visible around her eyes. Her face looked so tired that he wanted to laugh.
“Is this yours?” Fujishima then continued. “Hers?”
There was no reply.
“You should know. You guessed right the first time. Meth, syringes, and a pipe. All the trappings of a drug addict. So how did all this get into the house?”
There was no reply.
“Did Kanako’s weight suddenly change? Has she grown thin? What about her behavior?”

Kiriko opened her eyes. Her neck was covered in red rashes, probably smothered raw by tears and sweat. She shuddered, choking back her sobs.
“That girl… would never do something like that.”
“So it’s yours?”
“Don’t be ridiculous.”
“Aren’t you the one who’s being ridiculous?”

He sat down on the couch. Tapping the stimulants on the table as if to confront her with them, he stood up again for no reason and looked down at her.
“I guess it’s not yours.”
“It’s not…”
Fujishima slapped his cheeks. The grease and sweat were sticking to his hands. “Pieces of shit, you both.”
Kiriko remained very still and stifled, her eyes watering. She was overwhelmed by the thing in front of her.
“I didn’t think my daughter was hooked on speed1. Isn’t that just fucking fantastic?”
“Stop…”
“You used to yap about how I wasn’t fit to be a father. You talk like you know what you’re talking about. But you? Was it your dream to turn her into a drug addict? Gimme a break!”
“Stop! This is our own daughter you’re talking about. How could you say such a thing?”

Kiriko glared viciously at her ex-husband. But there was no power behind her expression. She was still crying, her eyes bloodshot. When was the last time they had looked at each other so intently?

“Because I don’t know. How she grew up. What sort of friends she hangs out with, what kind of food she likes. I’m her father, but I don’t even have the slightest clue.”
“But──”
“Just now I was wondering whether or not I really have a daughter at all. After all, it wasn’t like she’d ever rooted for me.”

“Are you… serious?”
“It’s your fault.” No time to argue, he waved his hand. “That girl’s involved in some kind of trouble.”
“Trouble… But she’s just a-”
“It’s not just an amount an ordinary high school student could carry around for fun and games. I looked around the room, but there was no sign of any clothing missing. Her travel bag was still there. If she had any common sense, she wouldn’t have stayed out overnight leaving that bag behind.”
Kiriko’s face had gone blank.

A long, thin breath escaped from her slack mouth. He had seen many women with this look on their faces. It was the face of someone who had been told of a close relative’s crime or death.

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“Why would she──”
“Isn’t this what you called me here to confirm?”
Kiriko’s voice caught in her throat.
“You aren’t going to call the cops?”
“Shouldn’t that be obvious?”
“Why the hell would you! You can’t!”

Kiriko took Fujishima’s hand and latched onto it like a child. She looked up at him with eyes that seemed to be pleading for salvation, digging her long fingernails into his wrists. “There’s no way we can do anything about this by ourselves!”

“Then why did you call me? That’s what you intended from the start, no?”
He brushed her off. The packets, syringe, and aluminum pipe were stuffed into the second bag. As he rose to his feet, she reached for the phone.
“Stop!” He seized Kiriko’s wrist. She tried to shake it off with unexpectedly strong force.
“Let go, let go of me!”

He grabbed the cordless phone with his left hand before she could get it. The rampaging Kiriko was caught in his arms. The smell of her perfume was intoxicating. And the smell of sweat and alcohol. The feel of her soft arms and the warmth coming from her made his back buckle involuntarily.

“Listen. What do you think will happen if those guys find out about this? You used to be a detective’s wife. Do you understand?”
“Let me go! Quickly, or else she…”
“Listen to me. Our daughter’s gotten mixed up with something. It’s the kind of stuff that people love to cry over. Can you handle them? What of Kanako? If the media finds out, her life is over. Can you endure that?”
In his arms, she was slowly losing the strength to resist. There was no way she could handle it. Countless thoughts must have been mixed up with each word he spoke to her.
Take, for example, the time when she was living in a government accommodation. She was already tired of being the wife of a police officer, and therefore had become a bit of a pariah. She did not want to fit in with the police community and forced her daughter, Kanako, to follow suit. She devoted herself to her daughter’s upbringing, and planned to take advantage of her entrance into a private junior high school to join a new community that was more appropriate to her status.
“She must have run away on a whim. That has to be it.”
A wail, almost a scream, escaped from her throat. “What would you know?”

“Just let me take care of it.”

An ache shot through his chest. With her face buried in his shirt, she dug her fingernails into the flesh of his chest. He felt like he was in a coma. Pulling away from her grasping hands, he let her hold the cordless phone instead. As he handed it to her, she looked at Fujishima with glazed eyes that seemed to be at a loss. It was as if she had forgotten how to use it.
“It’s all so unfair… it’s awful…”
“If you’re not gonna call, hurry up and take a bath. You stink of alcohol. Besides, I have a lot of questions that need answering.”
“I can’t believe I tried to rely on you.”
As if she’d been wrung out at last, Kiriko put the cordless phone on the table. She slowly left the living room. Soon, he began to hear the sound of running water coming from the washbasin.
Fujishima remained silent and put a cigarette in his mouth. His hand trembled as he held the lighter. He knew he was not in his right mind. The gravity of the situation was crushing him. What could be done with just two of them? There was nothing to be done. He scrunched up his face.
At some point, someone would notice Kanako’s disappearance and start making a fuss. His intuition as a detective told him so. Their daughter was not safe. It was a fitting fate for her parents, who were only concerned with their own self-preservation. Utterly risible. But what if they had brought her back alive, no matter what the circumstances? He dreamt a dream. The furniture, the dishes, the music, and the smells were all distant, but this room was still home. He was too old to be alone.
The glass door of the cupboard opened. The location of the spare key had not changed. It was quietly placed beside a stack of dishes. The key had a familiar scratch on it. He had used it a long time ago. Putting it in his pocket, he thought of Kanako. The image of her rotting away in the summer heat flashed through his mind. He cursed himself for only being able to imagine such a thing.

 

 

T/N
1. here Fujishima refers to it as shabu (シャブ) which is slang for uppers, usually meth

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