Chapter 66: [Vol. 2 pt. 17]

None of us were quite able to function properly after eating the delicious feast that Cani prepared for us. Well, it wasn’t much of a feast, and all she had to do was active a single recipe to craft the food, but still. Me, Akorya, and Wally were all stuck at the table with our hands on our stomachs. It might not have been possible to feel hungry nor stuffed in the game – at least, not stuffed in the food sense, but it was the appropriate reaction to such a meal.

And when I remembered the fact that Lily wanted me to be interested in other women so that we both had more partners in our relationship, I found myself not quite able to take my eyes off of the pink-themed waitress of ours. While her ears and tail were cute, they weren’t nearly as attractive to me as the rest of her body that seemed to be perfectly designed to emulate a goddess of fertility.

Not the type of goddess of fertility that they made figurines of thousands of years ago that were short with huge tits and giant bellies. Not the kind that had like sixteen tits stretching from their normal spot down to her knees, eithers.

Thinking about it, the real world had some pretty strange ideas of what it meant to be a goddess of fertility.

And people complained about girls in hentai having unrealistic proportions. Hah. At least they vaguely looked human instead of like aliens. Even the alien girls in hentai looked more realistic.

“I hope there’s an alien event someday,” I said once the thought of alien girls probed my mind.

“Aliens? Why? That would completely go against the game’s setting,” Wally said.

“Hey, we’ve already got ruins of ancient cities and dungeons that are full of high-tech monsters and machines. Why can’t we have aliens?”

“There is a stark difference between ruins of ancient civilization in a fantasy settings, and aliens. One is a common trope and not at all jarring. The other is – well, aliens. How  is that not immersion-breaking?”

“Look, all I’m asking is for an alien ship to crash land somewhere for a special event that lets players unlock an alien race so that I can have some fun with an alien. I’m not even asking for super weird aliens or anything. Maybe just… somebody with blue skin and four eyes with a little glowing tentacle sticking out of their forehead or something.”

“Like this?” Akorya asked, holding a hand up against her forehead with one finger sticking out that she wiggled around. She was adorable.

“Wait, who are you? I thought Akorya was sitting there, but all I see is an alien.”

 “Nyehe. Crap, I mean… uh… beep boop.”

“So, you’re not only an alien, but an android alien? A robot alien?”

“Zip zap!”

“I see. Let me try to speak in the language of your people, then. Blorb, glork?”

“Yorb!”

“Mork blum pip.”

Akorya giggled and rocked from side to side in her seat. “Hurb nuz plom!”

While Akorya and I continued talking to each other with completely nonsensical words, Wally planted his face in his palm and pretended that he had no idea who we were and that he definitely wasn’t associated with us in any way.

No matter what embarrassment Wally might have felt, though, it did not take away from me wanting to fuck an alien.

Once Akorya and I were done screwing around as wannabe aliens, I found my eyes back on Cani with my mind back on comparing her to a fertility goddess. Rather than one of the alien-like fertility goddesses, though, I simply thought of her as the kind of woman I would really, really want to breed.

Lily was perfect, but Lily was kind of overpowered in the chest area. Her tits were undoubtedly her most obvious feature even if the rest of her body was nice and thick to match them. Even so, when it came to things like her ass and thighs, they wouldn’t have been capable of sticking out as much as her breasts without growing to ridiculous sizes that just looked unattractive and uncomfortable.

But she was still perfect because she was Lily and it was impossible for her to be anything but perfect.

I would call Lily a fertility goddess as well, but if I was really being accurate, it would be safer to call her a titty goddess. Or a perfection goddess. Either or.

But Cani’s body was perfectly proportioned. She still had a sizable chest, but it was in perfect harmony with the rest of her from what I could tell. She had a great, full figure to go with her short stature where no one part of her body overshadowed any other part of it. Whether it was her chest, her rear, her legs, her hips – her body looked like it was crafted to be the pinnacle of arousing proportions. The only part that was debatable, really, was her height. Some people might have liked a taller goddess of fertility. Personally, I loved height differences between partners. Considering that I was always on the taller end of things, that meant I loved my partners to be short since I wasn’t going to find anybody significantly taller than me.

Some people liked to post pictures of their favorite porn stars to communities online dedicated to women who looked perfect for breeding. Wide hips, generous breasts, some meat on their bones – that was the kind of women they’d post. The kind of women who looked like they’d be an amazing fuck and then even better for raising children. Sure, these communities were usually tied to some older views that may or may not have had some pretty shitty elements to them, but they still had great taste in women.

Cani would be their goddess and that was even before thinking of the other parts such as her apparently loving to cook and wanting to wear maid costumes.

Maybe she wasn’t only a goddess of fertility, but a goddess of old-fashioned wife-ness?

Whatever she was the goddess of, she was undoubtedly nice to look at even if there was a bit too much pink at times. Even so…

I couldn’t help but to feel that there was something incredibly fake about her.

She was too perfect in how she was designed and acted. Then again, it was always possible that she was roleplaying a character of sorts. There were all sorts of people who liked to pretend to be different over the internet, or they liked to only show a certain side of themselves. That was the vibe I got from her. She seemed more like an artificial character rather than an actual player. More than the usual, anyways. Then again, it wasn’t like I spent much time with her and we barely talked.

Maybe I was jumping to conclusions.

Maybe I wasn’t.

There was no real way of knowing yet. So, instead of focusing on what I didn’t know, I switched back to talking about what I did know. “So, Wally, think you’ll need anything else for the seed?” I asked. I had already showed it to him while we were eating so that he could see what the recipe was, and it was something that he was good enough to make use of. By good enough, I mean that his crafting stats for the related crafting class needed were high enough. In this case, the seed required the gardening class and the first tier of max-level gear associated with the class in order to meet the stat requirements.

It was nice having a friend who had every crafting class maxed out and geared.

“Of course I will need other materials,” Wally answered. “Do you really think I would be able to make something with only a single ingredient?”

“Let me rephrase then. Is there anything that you need me to get or to pay you for?” I asked.

“No. I will handle the rest of the ingredients myself. As for payment, considering that I would not be able to craft such recipes without you in the first place, you need not pay me anything else.”

“I figured. You know, I appreciate that we’re both getting something out of this, but I still feel like I should give you something since I’m coming to you for crafting.”

“I doubt that there is anything you could give me that I need.”

“What about a blowjob?”

Wally’s eyes widened as he choked. As for what he choked on, I have no idea, but he did choke and cough. Maybe that was him trying to imply that he wanted to be the one using his mouth? Unfortunately, I doubted that much, and he proved it with what he said. “I – I swear. You… are unbelievable.”

“What’s so unbelievable about it? Just because I’m always doing things with women doesn’t mean I won’t dick down a guy, or let a guy dick me down, whenever the mood strikes.”

“Ooh, can I watch?” Akorya asked.

“Sure.”

“Nice.”

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“There will not be anything to watch!” Wally protested.

Akorya sighed. “That’s no fun. Come on, why not?”

I nudged Akorya with my elbow and shook my head at her. “All that matters is that he said no. If he’s not into it, that’s all there is to it.”

She sunk into her chair a little from that. “Oh, sorry. I’ll stop.”

As much as I might have liked to tease Wally, I didn’t want Akorya pressuring him into explaining himself. I was already probably being a bit too mean by making him uncomfortable with those sorts of questions and offers… but his reactions were too irresistible for me to stop.

Thinking about it that way really made me feel horrible. Well, it made me sound horrible. I didn’t want to stop because I thought my target was irresistible. Probably not a very good quality to have. Fortunately, that strictly applied to some very light teasing and nothing more. Plus I stopped Akorya from pressuring him, so that totally balanced things out.

Though, I was surprised to see Akorya react how she did. I only gave her a very tiny scolding, if it could even be called that, but she reacted pretty strongly to it. Well, stronger than I expected her to. She really looked upset about it.

I made a mental note to myself to be careful when it comes to scolding her for things. Between how she stayed the fairy bitch’s friend through all the abuse she was put through, and now this, maybe there was something else there that I’d need to watch out for.

That meant it was time to make them both feel better.

I wrapped one arm around Akorya to try and give her a bit of physical comfort while looking at Wally to say, “But seriously, if there’s something – anything that I can do for you, I’d be happy to. Including innocent, non-sexual things.”

Wally sighed and rubbed his forehead. “There is nothing that I can think of. I mean it when I say that being given the opportunity to craft for a dungeon is all that I need since it gives me progress toward completing every available craft in the game.”

I wondered if telling him about the unique recipes that Sophie had would crush his dreams. Unless he planned on becoming a chosen of Gluttony, then I doubted that he’d be getting to craft those at any time.

“Wait,” Wally said. “There is… one thing, if you truly are so… insistent on helping me.” He seemed a bit nervous with a hint of red coloring his cheeks as he forced himself to look me in the eyes.

“Yeah?” I asked.

He cleared his throat. “You see, I… have a friend who plans on starting the game the weekend after next. She is busy until then, but I will also be… busy, during that weekend. Real life matters, you see. So… I will not be able to play with her, but I fear leaving her alone in this world without any guidance. So, if you are available and insistent on paying me back, then please play with her.”

“Babysit a noob? Sure, no problem. Anything I should know about her ahead of time?”

“Ah… probably not. She is your ordinary woman.”

“Ordinary woman. Got it. And, since she’s your friend, I’ll behave myself around her.”

“Meaning?”

“I won’t try to fuck her. Or flirt with her too much.”

“A-ah. I see. Well, I do appreciate the thought, but I do not… think it would be needed. What she chooses to do in the game does not matter to me. I simply do not want her to be taken advantage of, and I believe I can trust you not to do that.”

“Got it. In that case, I’ll only do lewd things with her if she makes it seem like she wants to.”

“Only – only if she wants to?”

“Well, yeah. It’s not like I’d do anything with her in the first place if she doesn’t make it obvious. So, if she tries something, I might reciprocate. But if she doesn’t, I won’t.”

“I see. So… she must be the one to initiate.”

I tilted my head. Something seemed a bit off, but I wasn’t sure. It almost felt like he was hoping I would do something with her. Maybe he was trying to hook me up with her? “Basically.”

“I see. Alright.”

Akorya looked just as confused when I took a look at her. Something was definitely off, but neither of us were sure what that something was.

“By the way,” Wally said, “that tournament – is it something you have any interest in?”

“Tournament?” I asked. It was obvious that he was changing the subject, but I figured it would get brought up again before meeting his friend.

“The PvP tournament in a few days.”

“Huh. Had no idea there was one coming up. Thera usually brings them up whenever she’s interested so, if she’s not interested, I won’t hear about it.”

“I suppose that answers whether you are interested or not.”

“Yeah, PvP isn’t really my thing unless Thera wants me to join her for something.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever done official PvP,” Akorya said. “I’ve gotten into some open world fights before, but never like, real fights. What about you?” she asked Wally.

While Wally answered her question with an elaborate refusal, as most of his answers were more elaborate than they needed to be, I noticed something.

A certain dog waitress of ours seemed particularly interested in the conversation now that the tournament and PvP was brought up. She wasn’t nearly as subtle as she thought she was. Her ears turned to face us, if only slightly, and she kept on peeking at us from the corners of her eyes.

The day was growing more and more interesting. There was already all the stuff with Sophie, but now I had several questions that I wanted answered.

One, how would Akorya react to me really going all out on her ears?

Two, was there something behind Akorya’s reason for sticking so long with the fairy’s abuse and then reacting as she did to some extremely light scolding? Scolding that was more like a gentle reminder?

Three, why did Wally apparently want to hook me up with his friend?

And four… it was obvious that Cani was an alt and she was clearly interested in PvP. In that case, was it safe to assume that her main was focused on PvP?

So many questions, so little answers.

At least Wally was about to make me a new trap for the dungeon.

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