Chapter 80: [Vol. 2 pt. 31]

Before I knew it, my dungeon was finally ready to open for business.

Well, it actually took way longer than I thought it would. When I first acquired my dungeon, I thought I’d have it up and running to accept clients within a day.

So much for that.

I didn’t really have anybody but myself to blame for how long it took, either. I kept on getting distracted with a hundred and one other things. The whole point of buying a dungeon was to turn it into a sort of monster brothel, but all I ended up doing instead was using it as a personal monster zoo while fucking girls inside of it.

And that was about to change!

Of course, there was one last distraction to finalize dealing with first.

After officially accepting Cani as an employee of the dungeon, I went and used the dungeon editing tool to create a room connected to the entrance tunnel. It was about twice the size of the shop that Cani owned back in the city, which I thought would be great, but it actually turned out to be a bit of a problem. Cani still had everything that she decorated her old shop with. The wallpaper, floor, furniture, cooking stations – all of it. When she lost her store, all of that was automatically deposited into her mailbox since the game wasn’t cruel enough to just outright delete everything she decorated the place with from existence.

Now, the wallpaper, floor, and ceiling designs all still fit. They automatically expanded to fill the room they were equipped to. But when it came to tables and chairs and all that – well, they remained the exact same size, of course.

So. Cani was previously in a small, cramped building. Now she had a place twice as big.

The result, after decorating her new little bistro with all of her previous furniture, was that the room ended up looking way too empty. Twice as much space for the same amount of furniture. It was a bigger problem than I thought it could be.

Fortunately, in a rare event that further played into the new side I saw from her, Thera basically went and acted like a sugar momma for Cani and bought her enough furniture needed to make the place look even better than it did in the city.

I didn’t know that having a fully furnished bistro was a requirement for launching the dungeon, but I felt like I was finally ready to get things hot and sticky once I saw it.

The dungeon would become hot and sticky with cum while the bistro became hot and sticky with warm syrups drizzled over delicious food.

“Wait, what if this is a bad idea?” I asked, standing at the entrance to the bistro as Cani finished preparing everything.

“What?” Cani asked, sounding a bit more energetic again now that she had her bistro back – or rather, now that she had a new bistro.

“There’s a good chance the entire dungeon is going to smell like cum and sex all the time. Is that going to ruin people’s appetites?”

Cani looked a little smug for the first time as she placed her hands on her hips. “Already took care of it.”

“How?”

“The slums my bistro used to be in were filthy and always smelled like rotting trash. So, I made sure to get a door that blocks all scent and noise from the outside.” She pointed at the door behind me. “Same door being used here. As long as people are in here, they won’t be able to hear or smell anything coming from the rest of the dungeon. Even if the door is open.”

“Oh. Great idea.”

Cani nodded her head. “Just uh… don’t let anybody come in here and start having sex on the tables or anything. There’s nothing my door will be able to do about it if that happens.”

“Don’t worry. Your little restaurant here will be a no-sex zone. Anybody who breaks the rules will get kicked out and banned from the dungeon.”

“Well… I mean… it doesn’t have to be… completely no-sex.”

“I thought you didn’t want anybody making a mess in here?”

Cani bit her lower lip and looked around with a hint of blush on her cheeks. “You’re not going to say you’re doing this all out of the kindness of your heart or anything stupid like that, right?”

“Of course not.”

“Then… I’m not dumb.” She reached up to the top of her pink maid uniform and tugged down on the neckline just enough to show some more of her cleavage. “You’re expecting this kind of service, aren’t you? As long as we do it when there aren’t any customers around, I’ll have enough time to clean things up so nobody smells anything when they’re trying to eat.”

“I see. Then, in that case,” I paused, slowly approaching her as I looked her body up and down. It was definitely a nice body that I wasn’t going to pass up on if she was offering it to me. So, when I came to stand directly in front of her, I reached up with a lone hand to grab her by her chin and tilt her head back. “You’re right. I obviously didn’t do all of this just to be nice.”

Cani struggled to look in my direction as her cheeks grew an even darker shade of red. “It’s just a game, so… you can do whatever you want to me. I expected this sort of thing ever since I saw your ad… so it’s okay.”

“Is it? You’re telling me I can anything I want to you since it’s just a game?”

“Ye-yeah.”

“In that case,” I paused and leaned in closer, bringing my mouth right against her ear… before blowing in it.

Cani jumped and backed away, placing her hand over her ear as she looked at me with wildly confused eyes.

“You’re too easy,” I said. I really couldn’t pass up… on teasing her. “Relax. I’m not some white knight who did all of this out of the niceness of my heart, but I am basically expecting unpaid labor from you in working here. Don’t forget that your main duty is greeting people at the dungeon’s entrance and helping them decide what they want. This bistro of yours is your secondary job.

“You… you seriously didn’t expect me to do anything like that for you?”

“Right.”

Her canid ears flattened atop her head as her tail hung low. “O-oh. Of course you didn’t. I mean… it’s not like—”

“Don’t get me wrong, I want to fuck you over every single table, chair, and counter in here until your womb is so inflated with my cum that you look pregnant with triplet horses. But one, I’d never do anything for anybody while expecting sex in return, and two, I’m really excited to finally get my dungeon going. I know that if I have sex with you then I’m probably going to lose a few hours of time and have to push back opening the dungeon for another day.”

The dog girl’s ears perked back up as her tail swished around behind her. “Oh. I – I see. Well… it’s not like – it’s not like… I’d refuse if you ever wanted to. I owe you… after all.”

She really was too easy. She was also really good at triggering my teasing side. “Don’t worry. I wouldn’t make somebody do something just because they feel like they owe me.”

“I – I mean! It’s… it’s not like… it’s not like the only reason is… it’s not like I don’t… want to.”

“You don’t want to what?”

I didn’t expect what I saw next. Cani balled her hands into fists as she gritted her teeth. I almost thought I could hear her growling a little bit. “I… fuck… fuck this.” With a heavy step forward, she thrust her arm out and grabbed me by the collar of my vest, pulling me down so that my face was right in front of hers. “You know exactly what I’m trying to say,” she said, her voice lower than before as she stared directly into my eyes. She was less like a dog and more like a wolf. “Stop fucking around. I’m not good at being… girly, so don’t make it even harder on me than it already is. Just tell me that you’ll mate me when you—”

“Goodness, I didn’t expect you to break so early,” Thera said, revealing her presence in the doorway as Akorya and Lily both peeked into the room like a couple of kids next to Thera.

And now, Cani’s face turned pure red as she let go of me and backed away.

“Darling, were you teasing her?”

“I might have been,” I answered.

“I see. Her mask always has broken rather easily.”

With her hands over her face, Cani twisted her upper body from side to side as she whined. “I – I’m never going to change!”

“Please, as if you have anything in need of changing.”

“I do! They all told me so!”

“And I have told you that you are already perfect as you are, have I not?”

“But… but…”

Thera sighed and placed her face into her palm. For once, it wasn’t because of me. “Tell me something, darling. Hypothetically, is there anything wrong with a woman who considers herself the opposite of feminine? The opposite of… girly?”

“Not a damn thing,” I answered. “Tomboys are hot. So are girls who just aren’t feminine in general but aren’t necessarily tomboys. Nothing wrong with that.”

“There is nothing wrong with a girl who enjoys fighting, exercising, drinking and swearing, and nerding out over video game lore, is there?”

“Mi-mis—Thera!” Cani whined.

“Nope,” I answered. “That sounds like a pretty awesome person. Well, assuming that they don’t drink too much.”

“There you go,” Thera said. “A man said it rather than a woman. Does that help your complex?”

I turned to look at Cani since Thera was talking to her. Cani noticed me looking at her and turned her back to us. “I – I don’t know what you’re talking about. Besides, words are just words. It’s not like there’s any proof that they’re honest.”

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“I see. Darling, you find Lupi attractive, yes?”

I nodded and answered, “I do.”

“Then what would you do if she approached you and demanded that the two of you have sex?”

“Hmm. Depends on what role she wants to take. I would either breed her like a wild animal until I pump so much cum into her that she looks pregnant with a dragon, or I would let her pin me down and fuck me until I feel like all the bones in my body are going to break from how roughly she dominates me. I’m down for either. Actually, that’s got me thinking. I want to fuck, or be fucked, by somebody who is so insanely stronger than me that they need to be held back with literal chains and other metal gear to prevent them from literally breaking my body during it. Maybe an ogre. Yeah, an ogre woman with horns, huge arms with biceps bigger than my torso, and thighs that could crush a car between them. I want to feel like a fairy next to her as she fucks me into the life after the next one. Hey, Thera, do you know any ogres?”

“I do. They all have… third legs. And when I say a third leg, I do mean, quite literally, the size of a leg if not bigger.”

“So, what you’re telling me is that you know some ogre futas with giant, throbbing, muscular cocks?”

“Indeed, darling.”

“And you haven’t introduced me to them?!”

“Because they are all, to put it bluntly, extremely gay. The only have an interest in other futanaris.”

“Damn it. Time to level up my alt and get her a dick.”

“Are you good at acting like a girl?”

“Not at all. I always just acted like a guy in a girl’s body when playing on my alt.”

“Then it would not be enough. You see, I have a theory. My theory is that this particular group of futanari are all men, yet they claim to be women and expect everybody else to be women. They have no interest in anybody who makes it clear they are a man.”

“What makes you think that?”

“Two of them have sent me private messages asking if I would be interested in them if it turned out they were actually men. One admitted that he is, in fact, a man, and begged me not to tell the others after I rejected his advances.”

“Oh. Considering the context, yeah, that’s pretty telling.”

“Indeed.”

“How’d you even meet them anyways? And wait, I thought they were only into other futanari?”

“Apparently, having an ovipositor is enough to count as having a penis for them.”

“I forget you have that sometimes.”

“I am part spider, darling. As for how I met them – well, one of them randomly invited me to hang out sometime when I was bored and had nothing else to do, so I decided to accept the invitation. We had quite a pleasant tea party together… before the rest of them began to make a mess of one another. Also, they like to shower me in any spare money they have since they have too much for their own good and nothing else to use it on. I do not even need to do anything other than show up for tea before they give me all of their spare coin.”

“Thera… are you being a gold digger to a bunch of men playing as futanaris pretending to be real women who all try seducing you because they believe you’re an actual, real woman?”

“I take offense at you even asking me that. Of course I am not a gold digger. Digging implies effort on my part and I assure you that it takes zero effort to drink tea while they trade me money.”

“I kind of feel bad for them.”

“Does it kill your sympathy for them if I tell you that they have sent me pictures of their real tools, unsolicited?”

“Oh. In that case, yeah, get as much money as you can from them.”

“That is what I thought. Proud of me now, darling?”

“I’m always proud of you, best spider.”

“For a spider to feel butterflies… how ironic. Also, let me tell you something else. You know the stereotype about how those who give themselves such gigantic tools in this game are those who have the most to compensate for in real life, yes?”

“I mean, some of us just have hyper cock fetishes, but yeah. I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s often true.”

“Well, at least in their case, I assure that it is most certainly an accurate stereotype. I have never seen such… small, pathetic little things.”

“Alright, now I’m back to feeling bad for them.”

“Even I felt bad for them and I was the one who was sent their pictures without warning. I actually typed, ‘I’m sorry,’ in the box before realizing I was about to destroy his ego and entire sense of self. I ended up asking him, ‘Isn’t sending that sort of picture against ToS?’ He apologized after that and begged me not to report him.”

“Well, you’ve killed any interest I had in them. I won’t fuck with anybody who sends unsolicited pictures like that.”

To my side, I felt a certain tugging on my arm and turned to see Lily standing there as she looked ready to cry. “I-is… am – am I – am I bad? Should – should I have not sent mon maître those… pictures,” she was too nervous to blush, “without asking?”

“Lily,” I said, grabbing her by her shoulders and looking her directly in the eyes, “we’re dating. You’re allowed to send me as many unsolicited pictures as you want. If anything, I’ll happily beg you to. In fact, it’s impossible for anything from you to be unsolicited because I am in a constant state of twenty-four-seven consent to you.”

Like a mountain of stress was lifted off of her shoulders, Lily smiled and wrapped her arms around me. Just a couple of moments later, though, she pulled herself off of me and jumped back a little as she looked at Cani. “S-sorry! I – um, we – we might be… dating, but you – you’re allowed to do whatever you want with him, still! I didn’t mean to interrupt! Please don’t – don’t mind me!”

Cani looked utterly defeated with slumped shoulders and everything. “You’re so… girly. Also, he’s your boyfriend. You’re not supposed to be apologizing to me about getting in the way of fucking your boyfriend.”

“Nyehehe,” Akorya laughed, now standing next to Lily with an arm around her shoulder like partners in crime. “Don’t mind her. That’s just Lily being Lily.”

“Is she… one of those girls who gets off to being cheated on or something?”

“Nah. I think. Actually… are you, Lily?”

Lily was quick to shake her head. “No, no! It is just… mon maître deserves to have as many partners as mon maître wants!”

“Aren’t you also a bit excited because it means that anybody who is mine is by default yours, too?” I asked. “I bet you want me to get a bunch of girlfriends just so that you can snuggle the fuck out of all of them since they’d all be your girlfriends, too.”

Now Lily’s face turned red. “M-mon maître!”

Akorya laughed some more and got even closer to Lily, pushing the side of her face up against Lily’s to nuzzle her. “Nyehehe, if you wanna cuddle, all you have to do is tell me! We can cuddle whenever you want, either just between the two of us or with master’s cock between us!”

Lily looked too embarrassed and too happy to reply to anything, but she did at least rub her cheek back against Akorya’s.

“I… can barely keep up with all of you,” Cani said.

“Don’t worry about it. You’ll get used to us,” I said. “Also, one last thing before we officially open up.”

“Yeah?”

“Be yourself. If you want to change who you are and try to be something else, that’s alright. That’s your choice. But just know that you’re welcome, and will be accepted here, no matter who or how you are. And if anybody ever complains about you being you, I’ll deal with them myself. Got it?”

Cani’s eyes widened just a tiny bit before looking away again. “And… and what are you getting out of saying that?”

“Well, this time, it is out of the goodness of my heart. Well, not even that. It’s just out of trying to be a basic, decent human being. I would hope that everybody feels that way without expecting anything for it.”

“They’re just wor—”

“Don’t even bother,” Thera said. “My darling is many things. A liar and exaggerator, he is not. You can place more faith in his words than my own, even. If anything, it would do him good to learn how to tell a little lie every now and then.”

“Thera, I don’t want to fuck you,” I said.

“Oh, is that so? Then I suppose I will find somebody else to defeat me and—”

“I take it back! See?! This is why I don’t lie! Nothing good comes out of it!”

Thera smiled and reached out to pet my head.

Technically, lying was what led to her petting my head.

Maybe lying had its merits after all.

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