Chapter 245: 244 Puzzling behaviour

It is tiring to live everyday.

It is tiring to breathe.

There are still days where she thinks it would be better if she ended her life. No matter how good her current situation is. Sumire understood that things cannot remain this way forever.

One day it will return to how it usually is.

Yuhi's kindness, the love and affection he has for her. All of it will disappear. Even if he is genuine, one day he will leave too. If he doesn't leave because he is tired of her, he will leave for another reason.

She doesn't expect him to stay.

...

The rooftop was an area closed off to patients. But because Sano gave her permission she was able to come here. At first she didn't want the special treatment. The other doctors and nurses already gossiped about her. However, she closed her eyes as a gust of wind blew. 'It is relaxing up here.'

Sumire did not know what to think when she walked into such a sight. Walking into Sano half naked with a girl. A deep sigh passed her lips. He should have at least locked the door. Isn't it improper for a doctor to act that way?

'It seems Sano's core nature doesn't change.' She thought. Or maybe all men behave that way? Is that all they want? 

She recalled Yuhi's words and paused.

She does not understand it very well. Why do they feel the need to get close that way?

"..."

Moments later she heard somebody approach her from the back.

"Why are you awake?"

"Nightmare." Sumire replied simply as she looked down at the city. The view at night is really good.

He seemed troubled and Sumire sighed. "You don't have to worry about it. I know you're clueless on what to do during these times."

She is no fool, she could understand what was on his mind.. Back when they were dating Sano did not know what to do whenever she became like this. Her thoughts broke off when she felt Sano drape his jacket across her shoulders.

"It is getting cold."

Sumire froze for a moment before she nodded.

Indeed he does seem rather strange recently. What was the turning point of this huge change? No matter how much she thought about it nothing would come to mind.

"That girl from before--" Sano started but she cut him off.

"I told you, you don't have to explain. I appreciate that you're taking care of me while Yuhi is away but that is all."

To her surprise he did not lose his temper and instead pulled her into his arms. "Let me go." She mumbled.

These arms are no longer familiar to her. His warmth is a burden. The one she wants isn't Nagawa Sano.

"Don't be stubborn, it is cold out here and you're a patient."

Is that why he decided to hug her? No, she isn't stupid. 

"...say Sano?" Sumire mumbled as something came to mind.

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"What is it?"

"You're always staying with me but I am sure you have a lot of work." Didn't he come to Tokyo because he was expanding his influence into the entertainment industry? Previously Hino mentioned it to her.

"Work can wait. Why would I waste an opportunity to spend with you?"

Uh….hold on- Sumire was very puzzled. Why is he saying such sweet sounding words? If it were like before and he said those words with his usual smile on his face it would not affect her. But now this is different. He is speaking so seriously. What is this odd situation?

She cannot figure him out at all.

To her surprise Sano suddenly lifted her face and cupped her cheeks. "You're not getting much sleep are you?"

"..."

Why is he treating her so kindly? It must be a trap. 

"I told you before not getting enough sleep will render your efforts  during the day useless."

".."

"Should we go on a walk tomorrow? Maybe some fresh air will do you some good."

Sano brushed his lips against her forehead. "I know you don't trust me Sumire and it is understandable why. But I need you to understand that I am serious about this."

She doesn't know what to say anymore. This person is indeed unusual.

"Where are we going tomorrow?" Sumire swiftly changed the topic.

"There is a garden center nearby here. It is in a quiet location." 

He  even remembers that she likes flowers. Ahhh this is giving her a huge headache, she doesn't understand this behaviour at all. Sumire thought she already had this person all figured out but here he is again doing something unexpected. 

"Are you agreeing?" Sano muttered.

"I do need some fresh air." Maybe he is planning on pulling another stunt tomorrow?

Maybe this kindness he showed her will end tomorrow when they are alone? But somehow that does not feel right either. 

Sano sighed deeply. "You're acting too cautious. I just want to spend the day with you."

"Don't we already spend a lot of time together?"

"No this is different."

Different how? She tilted her head confused but Sano suddenly picked her up. "Let's head back inside."

"I can walk, so put me down."

Sano sighed. "I saw you stagger in the hallway."

He saw her? So did he continue to do that stuff deliberately? She supposes a person's core nature doesn't change and yet his words do not match his actions. 'So contradicting.' But what does that make her? 

It's not that she can't stop him. She did beat him up that time he went overboard. But, it's more like she doesn't care. Whenever she speaks to Sano, it feels empty. It's the same as talking to air. When she is with this person, Sumire remembers how hollow and numb her emotions became towards others after their break up.

It was because of him that she lost faith in people. No matter what he does, it is already too late.

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