Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm

Chapter 517: The Celestial Court


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Chapter 517: The Celestial Court

“So this is the Celestial Court?”

Dumbo had morphed into Granny Liu and was looking around the Celestial Court.

Surprise was written all over the dog’s face.

Trumbo, on the other hand, was much calmer.

Even if it was equally shocked, it remained composed and smiled. “It is almost the same as the myths… by the way, Dumbo, have you heard of Yang Jian?”

“Yang Jian?”

Dumbo thought about it, and then shook its head, saying, “Never heard of him.”

Dumbo certainly was not aware of who Yang Jian was, and most importantly… it had merely been an ordinary black dog in the past.

It had gained intelligence after Jiang He inadvertently fed him his cucumbers, but it was not bothered to learn math, let alone read about divine myths.

Likewise, when the Jade Emperor, Erlang Shen, and Lü Dongbin all visited Jiang He together at the Hollow Jade Temple, Dumbo was already in seclusion, refining the Overdeity divinity given to him and not showing his face.

“Erlang Shen is a third-generation disciple of the Chan Sect, his master is the True Habitant of Yu Ding…”

“The True Habitant of Yu Ding? That geezer who kept chugging colas?”

“That’s not the point. The point is, Erlang Shen has a dog…”

“What the heck? The top dog of the Three Realms? Has he asked permission from me?”

Dumbo abruptly raised its voice.

Lord Tian Li turned to look at Dumbo and Trumbo then, saying, “We would soon arrive at the Southern Sky Gate… without a godly post, no one is to enter it on a whim, so watch your tongue when we’re there.”

As he spoke, he turned toward Jiang He darkly and said, “I’ve sent word to my comrades in the Celestial Court to alert the Jade Emperor ahead of us. Wait for a while when we reach the Southern Sky Gate, and the Jade Emperor would naturally send someone to receive you if he is willing to see you.”

Jiang He smiled but said nothing.

“Hmph!”

Lord Tian Li sneered inwardly. ‘Let’s see how long you could stay so smug. So what if you’re Grand Luo? We, the Thirty-Six Decan Lords, are close as brothers, and I’ve contacted my brothers in secret to expose you in front of the Jade Emperor, revealing how you’ve killed innocents and cut off their legacies on the homeworld!’

The group had just reached the Southern Sky Gate, however, and laughter could be heard—

“Mister Jiang!”

Dressed in his Daoist robes, Lü Dongbin was hurrying to greet Jiang He, laughing. “Mister Jiang, you’re finally here… His Majesty had been mentioning you often lately, and if you hadn’t come, he would have personally gone to the Hollow Jade Temple to visit you.”

“Brother Lü!”

Jiang He offered Lü Dongbin a fist-palm salute and smiled. “I myself am in hurry to visit the Jade Emperor in the Celestial Court, but since I was using the Primeval Lord of Heaven’s Three Gems Back Scratcher and I am not allowed to carry it out of the Chan Sect, I had to stay there for quite a while.”

“Please be careful of your wording, Mister Jiang!”

Lü Dongbin’s expressions changed slightly as he quickly said, “How could you say a Saint’s title directly?”

“Right, right…”

Jiang He replied. “I wasn’t thinking, I guess? I should have used ‘Elder Saint’ instead…”

Lord Tian Li was dumbstruck.

Despite being one of the Thirty-Six Decan Lords of the Celestial Court, all he could feel was that his perspectives of being a cultivator was completely collapsing.

Jiang He… was acquainted with the Duke of Dong Mu?

Though Lord Tian Li was himself a proper deity of the Celestial Court, he was insignificant compared to an ‘authority’ like the Duke of Dong Mu.

Moreover…

His Majesty was acquainted with Jiang He too?

Even more frighteningly…

Jiang He was acquainted with a Saint?

And the Chan Sect’s Saint had actually lent Jiang He his mystic treasure?

“No… this is impossible…”

“Didn’t Jiang He come from the homeworld? How could he be acquainted with His Majesty and the Chan Sect’s Saint?”

“I’ve already contacted my brothers to expose him…” Lord Tian Li shuddered as he came to a realization then.

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Meanwhile, Lü Dongbin was staring tightly at Dumbo and Trumbo with shock written all over his face.

Dumbo, who was getting a little uncomfortable from the staring, bared its teeth and barked, “What are you looking at, old Daoist? Have you not seen a dog this gallant? By the way, you are a god in the Celestial Court, yes? I heard there’s a Howling Celestial Hound acknowledged as the top dog of the Three Realms. Could you introduce us?”

Gulp!

Lü Dongbin swallowed.

It took him a long time to withdraw his gaze and mutter, “Jiang He, that dog and cat…”

“They’re my pets—you’ve met them before.”

“I mean to ask… are they Grand Luo already?”

“Nope.”

Phew~

Lü Dongbin breathed a sigh of relief at that. It was already unbearable for a lot people that Jiang He had reached Grand Luo in such a short time, but every cultivator in existence might as well stop bothering if it was the same for his pets as well.

Still, he was feeling rather puzzled… because he felt as if the cat and dog’s aura were stronger than his, and a vague sense of danger.

Noticing Lü Dongbin’s reaction, Jiang He promptly explained, “It’s normal if you feel danger from Dumbo and Trumbo. They may not be Grand Luo, but their combat ability could match one and they could definitely kill you.”

Lü Dongbin was rendered speechless.

“After most of you left Earth, the western gods had returned, intent on ruling Earth.”

“I’ve killed their many deities and gathered a lot of divinities. Both Dumbo and Trumbo here have managed to fully cultivate Zeus’s Overdeity divinity, so they would not lose out against the best of Grand Luo elites.”

Lü Dongbin was stumped.

He could not regain his sense just then.

Lord Tian Li, who was following him, appeared perplexed… this fellow destroyed the western gods too?

Wasn’t that too fersome?

And he had actually contacted his brothers to… what the hell!

Lord Tian Li promptly reacted then and rushed out of the Southern Sky Gates.

He needs to stop his ‘brothers’…

Why would they even provoke a god of death?

***

Moments later…

Back at the Celestial Court.

Jiang He met the Jade Emperor in one of the more laid-back palaces.

The Jade Emperor was very warm and sat beside Jiang He, asking after him… although he did not mention a word about certain individuals among the Thirty-Six Decan Lords, who were about to tell on Jiang He.

After some exchange, the Jade Emperor clapped his hands and a handmaiden entered with a jade tray, on top of which were two Spatial Rings.

“Jiang He, these two Spatial Rings contain 9,800 Dao Enlightenment Pellets and 100,000 portions of ingredients for the pellets respectively.” The Jade Emperor took the jade tray and personally passed both Spatial Rings to Jiang He.

Jiang He conveyed his gratitude, and promptly invoked both Spatial Rings with a drop of his blood and said, “As promised, I will pay for these Dao Enlightenment Pellets by a 1.5 ratio… the ingredients, on the other hand…”

“It’s enough to refine 300,000 Dao Enlightenment Pellets.”

Wang Hou smiled bitterly. “I did want to give you all the materials for making the Dao Enlightenment Pellets that we have, Mister Jiang. It’s just that the Dao Enlightenment Pellets are the most difficult immortal pellets to make of all rank-eight immortal pellets, and Celestial Court has barely any pellet refinists in the first place… and no one knows the recipe.”

Without the recipe, what use is there even in you giving me so much ingredients?

Jiang He complained inwardly, before pressing, “What about the recipe for the Dao Enlightenment Pellets?”

“Taishang Laojun was the one who had created the Dao Enlightenment Pellets, but he was not around when I visited the Tushita Palace,”

Still, the Jade Emperor assured Jiang He, “Even so, you need not worry, Mister Jiang—I will ask him for the pellet recipe once he returns.”

“Well…”

Jiang He groaned and asked, “When would he return?’

“He loves to travel around worlds, and would return in months, or after dozen thousands of years…”

Jiang He was dumbstruck.

Unable to decide if he could laugh or cry, he said, “Forget it, I won’t ask for the pellet recipe… I’ll research one of the pellets later to see if I could deduce its recipe…”

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