Chapter 29: 29

As he struggled to open his mouth and speak, Sethian, who was looking down, sat on the bed. He supported Yi-Gyeol’s head with one hand and brought the glass of water he was holding to his lips.

“Drink up.”

There was confusion as to why Sethian could touch him, but the water that came in front of him took priority. With the help of Sethian, Yi-Gyeol slowly drank water. It was only after the water got into his itchy throat that he realized he was thirsty.

Having drank the entire glass of water, Yi-Gyeol blinked slowly as he felt Sethian’s hand wiping the water around his lips.

“Right now, this… Is this a dream…?”

“No.”

Sethian placed the empty water cup on the side table, and properly covered the slightly disheveled blanket up to Yi-Gyeol’s neck.

“This doesn’t make sense….”

Yi-Gyeol muttered as if he were still half asleep.

“We met in the bathhouse and I came back…, My dad brought me to the hospital…, No, I was talking to my mom…. What did we talk about again? Umm….”

Something was muddled up inside his mind. He tried to revive the memories by organizing them step by step as they come to mind. And one by one, the memories came back.

“Don’t move and stay still! Do you want to collapse and go to the hospital again?!”

It’s been a long time since his father yelled so loudly. It always seemed like he was putting up with something, but that day it seems that he couldn’t do it anymore.

“I ruined the college entrance exam because of you Oppa. You broke the rhythm of my review the day before the test, and it was already past midnight when I came back from the hospital. Even then, I tried to hurry to see even one more letter, but what can I do when I took the test in the worst condition?!”

“You may as well be useless, but you shouldn’t be a hindrance. Are you trying to keep me from going to college? Do you hate it that much? Huh? Are you trying to make me not go because Oppa was stuck here even though you got accepted into a good university?”

“Why are you trying to ruin my life just because your life is ruined?!”

“Do well? Yeah, I would’ve done well if it weren’t for you, Oppa.”

He was going to give her some encouragement, but that ended up ruining his sister.

“So why do you have to ruin the kid’s exam by doing something you’ve never done before? Do you know how angry your Dad was?”

“Even though you can’t encourage your sister to do well on her exams, you shouldn’t have interrupted her. You didn’t do that on purpose just because you couldn’t go to college, did you? Or was it because you wanted attention since your mom and dad haven’t been paying attention to you lately?”

“Everyone is having a hard time because of you. If you can’t be healthy, then please just quietly stay still, Yi-Gyeol-ah.”

Everyone says they’re having a hard time because of him. It’s difficult because there’s him.

Because he’s a baggage. Because he’s a nuisance. Because he’s just a useless person who only wastes money and rice.

He was the problem.

To his family, he was nothing more than a pest.

His vision shook and tears welled up his eyes. When he remembered how he closed his eyes at the end of reality, he felt so unfair and sad that he could not bear it.

His heart was pounding and his head was throbbing. His breathing became so heavy that he couldn’t cope up with it. He felt blood rushing to his head.

“Wu, wuuh….”

“Joo Yi-Gyeol.”

He could hear Sethian calling next to him, but the only thing in his head was the resentful voices of his family and their faces mixed with criticism.

He wanted to die.

He was so afraid of dying, but he still wanted to die.

Why is he alive? If he had died as it was, he wouldn’t have had to think about it again. He wished all the memories of being despised by his family would disappear.

Tears completely covered his vision. Uncontrollable tears flowed down like crazy.

Then, someone’s face came into that blurry view. He couldn’t tell because it was blurry, but he seemed to know who it was.

“Seth…. Hic….”

“That’s right.”

Sethian wiped Yi-Gyeol’s eyes with his thumb. Tears filled with warmth flowed continuously. Each time, Sethian also wiped away his tears tirelessly.

“I…, I tried to kill myself….”

At Yi-Gyeol’s words, Sethian’s hand stopped into a halt.

“I don’t think I can endure any longer…. So I tried to kill myself….”

“….”

“I wanted to say goodbye to you right before I died…, I closed my eyes hoping for that… I met you but….”

“Who said you could die as you please?”

Sethian’s hands wrapped around Yi-Gyeol’s face. Yi-Gyeol’s cheeks, wrapped in two large hands, were excessively hot.

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“Now you can’t die even if you want to.”

Sethian’s face came close. His forehead touched lightly with Yi-Gyeol’s.

“I’m the owner of your body. You can’t die without my permission.”

Yi-Gyeol was just shedding tears despite Sethian’s mysterious words.

⋆♚⋆♛⋆♚⋆

Sethian looked down at Yi-Gyeol, who wept for a long time and fell asleep again.

“I don’t think I can endure any longer…. So I tried to kill myself….”

Thinking about what Yi-Gyeol had said, Sethian’s insides suddenly felt stuffy and his head heated up in fury. What the hell kind of treatment did he get for him to cry like that and even committed suicide?

‘The guy who was so afraid of dying.’

He was guessing that Yi-Gyeol was even contemplating suicide. But he didn’t think he’d really do it.

If Yi-Gyeol hadn’t come to see him at that moment, he might have really died. Even now, he gets a chilling sensation when he remembers the feeling of Yi-Gyeol’s faint presence gradually shattering. It doesn’t feel good to think that it was Yi-Gyeol’s soul dying.

It wasn’t really surprising that his family had driven Yi-Gyeol to death. He too had been threatened with assassination by his brothers from an early age until now, and his father, the emperor, neglected it even though he knew it from early on. He did not pay any attention to it, saying, ‘He has to get through it himself.’

Family was nothing short of strangers. On the contrary, they were even more vicious than others.

It would be better to just forget about such people.

Sethian looked down at Yi-Gyeol’s sleeping face for a long time.

⋆♚⋆♛⋆♚⋆

It was the next morning when Yi-Gyeol woke up again.

“This, did you use something like magic?”

In the meantime, Sethian, who ordered Lenox to bring a bowl of warm porridge, was quietly admiring Yi-Gyeol, who was rolling his eyes carefully around.

“Seth?”

He called his name with a slight frown. Sethian sat down on the bed and gave him the answer he was looking for.

“That’s right. Based on your soul, we created a body identical to your original body. Don’t worry, I didn’t duplicate it upto the disease that you used to have.”

Sethian pulled the duvet over the surprised Yi-Gyeol’s shoulder. Perhaps because it was a body with only bones, Sethian keeps thinking that the part looked too dangerous if it sticks out of the blanket even a little. In the meantime, he saw Yi-Gyeol biting his lower lips with a gloomy face.

“Because of me….”

His face grew darker.

“Is it a habit?”

Sethian’s words penetrated Yi-Gyeol’s ears.

“Thinking that everything is because of you.”

“….”

Yi-Gyeol couldn’t say it wasn’t a habit. Sethian expected that Yi-Gyeol’s habit of talking was due to the experiences he had while he was ill and the environment around him.

“It’s not because of you. I did it because I wanted to.”

Yi-Gyeol’s shaking eyes looked at Sethian.

“Why? You said that magic requires such a price. If it’s magic that can even create a body, wouldn’t that magic require tremendously?”

The reason why he kept blaming himself was because of the ‘cost’ required for the magic.

In fact, the cost of composing Yi-Gyeol’s body was actually one of the greatest among the ‘costs of magic’.

Vitality, in other words, life expectancy.

Magic that requires vitality as payment is by no means common. That’s why such magic was designated as ‘Golden Arts(禁術)’[1].

The fortunate thing is that humans in this world have a three to four times lifespan difference longer than the world where Yi-Gyeol came from and giving vitality once is actually only a few hours’ worth of lifespan.

However, if he told this to Yi-Gyeol, he would definitely be disappointed again. Sethian’s sure he’ll say something like he’s a burden or a nuisance. That’s why he decided to just say ‘vitality’ and not ‘lifespan’.

“All you need to maintain your body is my vitality. It’s not a huge price.”

“However….”

“Moreover, why do you think I saved you by creating a body like this?”

Yi-Gyeol kept his mouth shut and looked up at Sethian. Looking into his sharp eyes, it didn’t seem like there was a comfortable reason such as ‘because we’re friends’.

As if to represent his thoughts, Sethian answered first.

“I saved you to use you.”
 

TL Notes:

(禁術): ‘Kinjutsu, literal meaning: Forbidden Arts or Techniques’ according to my research, but I will keep using Golden Arts to align it with my translation.  Though I really don’t like the way he words it, what Yi-Gyeol really needs at the moment is a reason for living. And Seth telling that he has a use for him could very well be the reason. Also, look how caring Seth is…omg. He cares for YG in his own way and it’s kinda sweet.

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