Fakes Don't Want To Be Real
Psychke looked straight at her heartless brother with cold eyes.
Yzhar stood there silently, unable to read what she was thinking, then opened his mouth.
“It’s been a while, Psychke.”
“I want to talk to you for a moment.”
“Fine.”
“Just the two of us.”
“…”
Their eyes collided and Yzhar looked at the standing Verndia standing behind her. He nodded his head towards Psychke that means he agreed.
“Older brother!”
Lenox, who had been left behind with Verndia, was surprised. He hid behind Yzhar, trembling as soon as Psychke appeared.
“Go with Baron Hillace over there.”
“Br, brother.”
“If anyone sees you, they’ll they you’re a food, catch and eat you.”
Verndia was sarcastic at the two. He didn’t even try to hide how his lips twitched.
He also did not like being left with Lenox and Baron Hillace.
But what can he do if Psychke wanted that?
“Call me if necessary.”
He kissed the back of Psychke’s hand out of respect and smiled at Lenox.
It was a goofy smile shot at him.
“Duke, I think we had something to talk about.”
“Well, there is no such thing.”
“I am saying I have.”
Verndia left, saying it would be no fun to run away. He hasn’t looked at the stiff Baron Hillace since he appeared.
“Older brother…”
Lenox looked at his brother with his fearful eyes but Yzhar didn’t look at him.
Lenox was helpless and moved towards where Verndia was heading for. Their shuffling footsteps filled the silence.
“The baron might as well go.”
Baron Hillace looked at Psychke, couldn’t comprehend what she meant. Inevitably, he turned his head and went on his way. Finally, only the two of them were left and Psychke was the first to speak.
“Did you really want to kill me?”
A low voice trembled.
He grumbled out of misery.
“I don’t know what you are talking about.”
Yzhar, who was still wearing the mask of being a kind brother, crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes as if he doesn’t have any idea of what she was saying.
“You must have had a nightmare because your bedroom changed. It seems that Duke Lestir doesn’t even take care of you well.”
“I don’t know if your injured area is well.”
“Thank you for your concern, but as you can see, there are no injuries. Losing a match doesn’t mean everyone gets hurt.”
“Stop the disgusting play.”
Psychke coldly cut him. Her clenched fists trembled in ager.
Her voice was more subdued than usual.
“Why didn’t you tell me straight?”
She hated those 18 years since she hated Yzhar, so as Yzhar hated her.
She hated him for everything. For being cold to her without any reason, and even ignoring her with contempt. But if one asks if her loathe for him was enough to kill him, it was not.
In any case, he was her brother. He was still a person whom she sees and lives for ten years.
“I hate you, that I want you disappear from my sight. And you did.”
Whether she was used by her father or not, half of her life was for her Yzhar. He cheated using her skills, using her as his stepping tool. And she naively crawled on being used, saying that it was fine to take all of those things.
She hugged her bruised heart and forcibly swallowed it. But was this the end?
“Then I would have disappeared.”
She once had such a thought. If Lillian hadn’t come back, she wouldn’t have died.
Her father, brother, and Lenox tricked her to her death. She doesn’t know about Lenox or her father who always hated her the moment the truth was revealed, but Yzhar, who reached out his hand pretentiously, might regret it.
He said he had a bit of affection for her…
She thought so.
“You should have left sooner.”
The distant 18 years collapsed in an instant.
There was nothing left. Really, nothing.
“But my father said not to do that.”
There was no expression on the man’s face after taking off the mask of kindness. He looks empty.
“I hated you.”
The sound of the sword being pulled out of the scabbard was repulsive. A cold blade touched the nape of her neck. Something hot flowed down her neckline along with the fear of her neck being sliced.
But Psychke did not budge at all. What she did was to stare at him.
“Something that you don’t even know where you came from somehow caught my father’s eyes.”
“…”
“Psychke, Psychke, Psychke. That da*n name Psychke.”
Yzhar gnashed his teeth.
“Do you know how much Father took care of you?”
“What are you?”
Psychke’s eyes trembled at his unexpected words.
No way. Her father paid any attention to her though?
“The only thing father looked out for me was during swordsmanship training and even that, since you are superior, he didn’t look for me afterwards.”
“…”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
The blade from his sword pierced her skin.
Psychke let out a light moan at the pain she couldn’t ignore. The light sky-blue neck collar was dyed red.
“Why did Father only look at you? Why—”
Suddenly, Psychke felt a sense of déjà vu. It was the same situation with Lillian.
He has nothing that he owned and even tried having them with his life, yet he couldn’t have anything at all.
He loathed and wanted to kill the person who has what he desperately wanted, saying that Psychke took everything from him.
“If it hadn’t for you… or at least if you were not better than me, then…”
Yzhar was still grieving and couldn’t bring himself to speak. He was silent for long, and she looked at him, clenching her fists that her body trembled.
She didn’t know anything about his situation. Whatever she had been through, he had a more pitiful state. At least he was not deceived by the lie that she was the real one!
After a while, she felt a sharp pain in her neck. She was tired of this pain.
She looked at him, commanding in a cold tone,
“Stop, and put the sword away.”
“What?”
“You’re not going to kill me anyway.”
“Does it look like I’m doing this because I couldn’t kill you?”
“Then what?”
She laughed coldly, feeling the pain in the back of her neck.
“Why aren’t you killing me, then?”
“…”
“Older brother cannot kill me. Because if you kill me in a place like this, Silkisia’s reputation will be ruined. Then the interest of that chestnut-sized father in you will disappear completely.”
“…”
“Take it away. Or else-”
With her eyes down, Psychke gently grabbed the blade of his sword and gave it strength.
Surprised by this, Yzhar drew his sword.
“You’ve gone crazy.”
“I’ll just do it for you.”
Psychke smiled faintly.
“Give my regards to your father.”
There was no longer any regrets.
She turned her body around.
***
“Please, Duke.”
“It won’t be long.”
“No, let’s just go.”
Verndia threatened Lenox that he will hurt Yzhar after encountering them to the corner along with Psychke. But,
“You want to leave after being hurt like this?”
“If I receive treatment, I will get better soon.”
This was a personal matter, and it was something she had to solve on her own. She didn’t want to borrow his hand.
It was a time when he was comforting the person who was struggling to move, a priest was passing nearby.
“Priest!”
Psychke quickly called him and asked him to heal the wound on her neck.
The priest readily accepted, and shortly thereafter, only a long red mark remained where her blood had flowed.
She ran her finger over the remaining redness to show that it was not painful.
“It’s unfortunate that I threw my clothes away, but I think I can solve it somehow with the money I have. Therefore-”
“Was your heart hurt?”
Psychke’s words suddenly cut off.
Verndia, who was twisting his eyebrows, raised his hand and wiped the empty space under her eyes. He seemed to be wiping her tears away.
“While crying.”
“I didn’t cry.”
“A lie.”
Blink, she blinked quickly. Her eyes were not hot, or was her nose was cold after crying. It was him who lied.
“I really didn’t cry.”
Verndia did not object her words. Instead, he ran his large hands over her eyes, caressed her cheeks, and cupped them.
She could feel his calluses because of his training. Her body temperature slightly increased without doing much.
“I’m not crying…”
His large hands covered her eyes. Psychke reflexively closed her eyes. It was warm and cozy.
The moment she perceived the sensation, her tears silently flowed from her eyes.
“Ugh.”
Psychke was perplexed.
“Th, this.”
There was no need to refute. It was because he was holding her in his arms.
Her heart skipped a beat at the familiar warmth and smell.
It warmed her heart like a huge blanket.
“You know?”
Verndia softly whispered as if comforting a crying child.
“The Princess is more sad than happy. More afraid than happy. Unhappy more than happy.”
“….”
“Even so, you didn’t cry. Not even once. You never gave a good laugh. You look soulless.”
She tried her emotions not seen by others, but it must be because of her ring in her hand.
“Whether you cry or laugh, live by expressing your emotions, Princess. Don’t be sincere only when holding the sword.”
And her tears poured down.
It was the first time she had cried in front of someone since being adopted. Psychke was utterly embarrassed even as she cried. Her heart is so calm, but she was not sad, nor does she felt difficult because of things, or painful, so why do her tears come out?
And how did he know she was going to cry?
His hand that was wrapped around her waist, tightened.
When she flinched, Verndia calmed her down.
“Stay still. I won’t be able to go out until you let out everything.”
He hugged her tightly as if he knew how much she was crying even without seeing him.
Psychke closed her eyes.
She gave up on escaping and gave her mind to the unfamiliar emotions flowing like waves within her.
A riot arose in her heart.
It was as if something had been released from her heavy heart.
Chapter 74: CH 65
Yzhar stood there silently, unable to read what she was thinking, then opened his mouth.
“It’s been a while, Psychke.”
“I want to talk to you for a moment.”
“Fine.”
“Just the two of us.”
“…”
Their eyes collided and Yzhar looked at the standing Verndia standing behind her. He nodded his head towards Psychke that means he agreed.
“Older brother!”
Lenox, who had been left behind with Verndia, was surprised. He hid behind Yzhar, trembling as soon as Psychke appeared.
“Go with Baron Hillace over there.”
“Br, brother.”
“If anyone sees you, they’ll they you’re a food, catch and eat you.”
Verndia was sarcastic at the two. He didn’t even try to hide how his lips twitched.
He also did not like being left with Lenox and Baron Hillace.
But what can he do if Psychke wanted that?
“Call me if necessary.”
He kissed the back of Psychke’s hand out of respect and smiled at Lenox.
It was a goofy smile shot at him.
“Duke, I think we had something to talk about.”
“I am saying I have.”
Verndia left, saying it would be no fun to run away. He hasn’t looked at the stiff Baron Hillace since he appeared.
“Older brother…”
Lenox looked at his brother with his fearful eyes but Yzhar didn’t look at him.
Lenox was helpless and moved towards where Verndia was heading for. Their shuffling footsteps filled the silence.
“The baron might as well go.”
Baron Hillace looked at Psychke, couldn’t comprehend what she meant. Inevitably, he turned his head and went on his way. Finally, only the two of them were left and Psychke was the first to speak.
“Did you really want to kill me?”
A low voice trembled.
He grumbled out of misery.
“I don’t know what you are talking about.”
Yzhar, who was still wearing the mask of being a kind brother, crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes as if he doesn’t have any idea of what she was saying.
“You must have had a nightmare because your bedroom changed. It seems that Duke Lestir doesn’t even take care of you well.”
“I don’t know if your injured area is well.”
“Thank you for your concern, but as you can see, there are no injuries. Losing a match doesn’t mean everyone gets hurt.”
“Stop the disgusting play.”
Psychke coldly cut him. Her clenched fists trembled in ager.
Her voice was more subdued than usual.
“Why didn’t you tell me straight?”
She hated him for everything. For being cold to her without any reason, and even ignoring her with contempt. But if one asks if her loathe for him was enough to kill him, it was not.
In any case, he was her brother. He was still a person whom she sees and lives for ten years.
“I hate you, that I want you disappear from my sight. And you did.”
Whether she was used by her father or not, half of her life was for her Yzhar. He cheated using her skills, using her as his stepping tool. And she naively crawled on being used, saying that it was fine to take all of those things.
She hugged her bruised heart and forcibly swallowed it. But was this the end?
“Then I would have disappeared.”
She once had such a thought. If Lillian hadn’t come back, she wouldn’t have died.
Her father, brother, and Lenox tricked her to her death. She doesn’t know about Lenox or her father who always hated her the moment the truth was revealed, but Yzhar, who reached out his hand pretentiously, might regret it.
He said he had a bit of affection for her…
She thought so.
“You should have left sooner.”
The distant 18 years collapsed in an instant.
There was nothing left. Really, nothing.
“But my father said not to do that.”
There was no expression on the man’s face after taking off the mask of kindness. He looks empty.
“I hated you.”
The sound of the sword being pulled out of the scabbard was repulsive. A cold blade touched the nape of her neck. Something hot flowed down her neckline along with the fear of her neck being sliced.
But Psychke did not budge at all. What she did was to stare at him.
“Something that you don’t even know where you came from somehow caught my father’s eyes.”
“Psychke, Psychke, Psychke. That da*n name Psychke.”
Yzhar gnashed his teeth.
“Do you know how much Father took care of you?”
“What are you?”
Psychke’s eyes trembled at his unexpected words.
No way. Her father paid any attention to her though?
“The only thing father looked out for me was during swordsmanship training and even that, since you are superior, he didn’t look for me afterwards.”
“…”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
The blade from his sword pierced her skin.
Psychke let out a light moan at the pain she couldn’t ignore. The light sky-blue neck collar was dyed red.
“Why did Father only look at you? Why—”
Suddenly, Psychke felt a sense of déjà vu. It was the same situation with Lillian.
He has nothing that he owned and even tried having them with his life, yet he couldn’t have anything at all.
He loathed and wanted to kill the person who has what he desperately wanted, saying that Psychke took everything from him.
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Psychke’s tightly clenched fists, loosened. A bleak wind blew through her empty heart. My heart, which should have been hot, froze cold.“If it hadn’t for you… or at least if you were not better than me, then…”
Yzhar was still grieving and couldn’t bring himself to speak. He was silent for long, and she looked at him, clenching her fists that her body trembled.
She didn’t know anything about his situation. Whatever she had been through, he had a more pitiful state. At least he was not deceived by the lie that she was the real one!
She looked at him, commanding in a cold tone,
“Stop, and put the sword away.”
“What?”
“You’re not going to kill me anyway.”
“Does it look like I’m doing this because I couldn’t kill you?”
“Then what?”
She laughed coldly, feeling the pain in the back of her neck.
“Why aren’t you killing me, then?”
“…”
“Older brother cannot kill me. Because if you kill me in a place like this, Silkisia’s reputation will be ruined. Then the interest of that chestnut-sized father in you will disappear completely.”
“…”
“Take it away. Or else-”
With her eyes down, Psychke gently grabbed the blade of his sword and gave it strength.
Surprised by this, Yzhar drew his sword.
“You’ve gone crazy.”
“I’ll just do it for you.”
Psychke smiled faintly.
“Give my regards to your father.”
There was no longer any regrets.
***
“Please, Duke.”
“It won’t be long.”
“No, let’s just go.”
Verndia threatened Lenox that he will hurt Yzhar after encountering them to the corner along with Psychke. But,
“You want to leave after being hurt like this?”
“If I receive treatment, I will get better soon.”
This was a personal matter, and it was something she had to solve on her own. She didn’t want to borrow his hand.
It was a time when he was comforting the person who was struggling to move, a priest was passing nearby.
“Priest!”
Psychke quickly called him and asked him to heal the wound on her neck.
The priest readily accepted, and shortly thereafter, only a long red mark remained where her blood had flowed.
She ran her finger over the remaining redness to show that it was not painful.
“It’s unfortunate that I threw my clothes away, but I think I can solve it somehow with the money I have. Therefore-”
“Was your heart hurt?”
Psychke’s words suddenly cut off.
Verndia, who was twisting his eyebrows, raised his hand and wiped the empty space under her eyes. He seemed to be wiping her tears away.
“While crying.”
“I didn’t cry.”
Blink, she blinked quickly. Her eyes were not hot, or was her nose was cold after crying. It was him who lied.
“I really didn’t cry.”
Verndia did not object her words. Instead, he ran his large hands over her eyes, caressed her cheeks, and cupped them.
She could feel his calluses because of his training. Her body temperature slightly increased without doing much.
“I’m not crying…”
His large hands covered her eyes. Psychke reflexively closed her eyes. It was warm and cozy.
The moment she perceived the sensation, her tears silently flowed from her eyes.
“Ugh.”
Psychke was perplexed.
“Th, this.”
There was no need to refute. It was because he was holding her in his arms.
Her heart skipped a beat at the familiar warmth and smell.
It warmed her heart like a huge blanket.
“You know?”
Verndia softly whispered as if comforting a crying child.
“The Princess is more sad than happy. More afraid than happy. Unhappy more than happy.”
“….”
“Even so, you didn’t cry. Not even once. You never gave a good laugh. You look soulless.”
She tried her emotions not seen by others, but it must be because of her ring in her hand.
And her tears poured down.
It was the first time she had cried in front of someone since being adopted. Psychke was utterly embarrassed even as she cried. Her heart is so calm, but she was not sad, nor does she felt difficult because of things, or painful, so why do her tears come out?
And how did he know she was going to cry?
His hand that was wrapped around her waist, tightened.
When she flinched, Verndia calmed her down.
“Stay still. I won’t be able to go out until you let out everything.”
He hugged her tightly as if he knew how much she was crying even without seeing him.
Psychke closed her eyes.
She gave up on escaping and gave her mind to the unfamiliar emotions flowing like waves within her.
A riot arose in her heart.
It was as if something had been released from her heavy heart.
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