Chapter 5: 5: Boring Jeans

**Unknown**

I spun through the shimmering reality of fractured glass like one of those bladders the children used to kick around on the streets of Rivol. It was details like that that I clung to, desperately trying to merge the tidbits of my memory into something cohesive. Who was I? I felt like I had always existed, but never would. I looked in on reality from the outside, trying to figure out which shard of spinning glass I fit into.

Try as I might, I couldn’t find it though. I could feel it out there, spinning madly in this insane place. How did I even know it was insane? I’d seen shards like this before, that’s how. On the edge of one of those portals that took people from their home worlds and dumped them in the Shattered City like refuse. People like… what was her name? SHe was important to me, how had I forgotten her name? I remembered nothing but her beautiful starfield eyes and the feel of soft feathers beneath my fingers. Had I ever had fingers? I think I had.

I skipped through this shattered place, outside reality. I did not know who I was, or how I was. I knew I needed to get home. To her.

**Elsie**

I blinked as the driver of the truck blared his horn, like that was supposed to help or something. I tried to move out of the way of the delivery truck as it barrelled towards me with brakes squealing in protest, but I wasn’t going to make it. There just wasn’t physically enough time or space to get me out of the way.

That, it seemed, was not something my power seemed to give much of a shit about. Laws of physics? Bah. Limitations of the situation and my body? Fuck em.

With the speed and precision of a master class dancer, I spun out of the way of the six tonne steel vehicle with what seemed like millimeters to spare. I think I actually touched the side of the thing with the tip of my shoulder, that’s how close it was. My troubles weren’t done yet however.

Coming the other way, I saw a suburban mum in one of those people movers coming at me the other way. She had no idea where she was driving as the kid in the passenger seat appeared to be wailing its self centered little head off. To make matters worse, the girl I was intent on saving was in the path of this vehicle too. She stood there in a daze, her glasses clutched in her hand as though she’d caught them as they fell off.

Trusting in my abilities, I desperately lunged for her and pulled her to me. In an embrace that was right out of a slow dance, I pulled her back into the lane the truck had just come through. There was so much traffic everywhere, I just told my body which way I wanted to move, and my powers got us both there without harm.

Eventually, after far too long spent weaving us through the traffic, I got us to the other side of the road and onto the safety of the sidewalk. The whole thing had been an exercise in just how fine one could cut things without getting hit, and my heart was beating at a mile a minute. The girl I’d saved had her face buried in my neck and both arms wrapped tight around me.

She was shivering like it wasn’t the tail end of summer, and I could feel her glasses digging into my back where she held them.

“Are you okay?” I asked, my breathing ragged and gasping.

She shifted against me for a moment like she was considering just staying there in my arms, but finally she leaned back a bit.

“Maddy?!” I asked, incredulous that of all the girls to save, the cute one I met at a party was the one who had been in front of that truck.

Her eyes went wide as she recognised me, “E-elsie! You’re glowing! Why are you glowing? Why do your eyes look funny?”

“I don’t know! Are you okay though?” I asked, widening our embrace so I could look her over for injuries.

She nodded slowly, “Yes I think I am. I don’t feel like anything is hurt.”

I sighed in relief, “Okay, that’s good. Thank god… or whoever, I don’t know.”

“Yeah… um, how did you do that?” she asked, shyly running her eyes over my new inhuman features. It was really odd being the same height like this.

“Emerged last night…” I whispered in… shame?

“That’s so cool! What powers did you get? Was it super speed you used? Or do you have like, precognitive abilities? Or really fast reflexes!” she babbled, her shyness instantly being replaced by an almost manic interest in my Emerged nature.

“N-no it’s… not that cool,” I mumbled.

I heard a laugh behind me and Brook spoke up, “Don’t sell yourself short Elsie, you just saved the girl from traffic. That was pretty cool.”

“Yeah!” Maddy beamed, “It was super cool! Oh my gosh!”

“See! The damsel agrees,” Brook grinned slyly.

“Th-the damsel?” I asked, but got only a wink in reply.

Finally letting go of Maddy, who I swear growled at being released, I asked her, “How come you’re out here?”

“I was going to Burger King,” she said, scuffing the pavement with her vans shoe.

“Let’s all go there together then! We ate recently but I think I still have room,” Brook said cheerily.

I nodded a little too hard, “Yes! Definitely!”

Keeping my head down to avoid the few people on the street who had stopped to stare at my display of inhuman abilities, I followed Maddy and Brook as we made our way towards food.

****

Maddy looked hesitantly over at me and asked, “What are you going to get?”

“Uh-hhm. I don’t know. Maybe I’ll just get a BK chicken like you were talking about,” I said with a smile that did nothing to hide my blush.

Just standing next to her ordering food and being… normal friends was making me feel all warm and fuzzy. She was the first girl I’d hung out with aside from Brook in years and I was acutely aware of her. Her slightly dishevelled nerdy look was so endearing to me, and I was saying that as someone who was probably somewhere along those lines as well. I think I finally discovered my type.

Brook gave a snort from my other side, and I looked over at her inquisitive, “What?”

She shook her head and laughed softly, “Nothing Elsie, nothing.”

I decided not to pursue the matter, and we made our orders. Standing there waiting for our numbers to be called, Brook started asking Maddy questions.

“So Maddy, I heard you met Elsie at the party last night?” she asked casually.

“Yeah! I wanted to hide behind the shed because everyone went nuts after that Emergence, and I found Elsie already hiding! She was super cool though and let me hang out there and stuff. Until she fell on me. That was embarrassing but I didn’t mind ‘cos her hair is really soft,” Maddy said excitedly.

“Oh? She fell on you?” Brook asked, turning to me with a raised eyebrow.

My responding blush was almost instantaneous and I vigorously shook my head, “No no! It wasn’t anything weird! I was just really drunk and I like fell over! No! Brook stop making that face! I’d never do anything like that with Maddy!”

Brook winced and asked, “Ohhh Elsie.”

“What?” I demanded.

“Nothing,” she sighed, and turned to pick up her order.

I looked over at Maddy and found her staring at her phone. I couldn’t see her face, but I realised she was probably super weirded out by that whole conversation. I decided not to push it and hope we could just forget about it.

Once we’d all picked up our orders from the counter, we made our way to a booth and sat. Brook took one side of the booth and didn’t shimmy over to let me sit, so I sat in the other one instead. Maddy, seeing that Brook wasn’t budging, was forced to sit next to me instead. I could see she wasn’t comfortable with it after that awkward conversation we’d had. Damn it Brook. I knew she was straight!

We ate our meals in silence for a little while but it seemed Brook couldn’t take the silence for long, because she spoke up, “So you’re registered as a class one Emerged now Eloise May Hartley. What are you going to do now?”

“I don’t know. Keep studying? Nothing really changes. I didn’t get a power that can make me any money, so I guess I’ll keep going,” I shrugged.

“Class one? You haven’t told me your power yet Elsie... What is it?” Maddy asked quietly.

“Nothing cool. I just have this weird uncanny ability not to fall over or get hurt, it’s only good for not falling over when I tripped on my jeans this morning and dodging traffic apparently,” I sighed.

“Ha! But the tripping over the jeans thing was very funny,” Brook laughed.

I looked down at my food and smiled, “Shut up Brook!”

“What happened?” Maddy asked, smiling despite not being in on the joke yet.

“So she stayed at my place last night, and when she got out of the bed, she tripped over her jeans that were left on the ground. But instead of falling she did a cartwheel and even ended it with a pose!” Brook said, beginning to laugh before she was even finished telling the story.

She! Why did that make me smile?

“It was so embarrassing,” I said with a fake grumble.

“That sounds really cute,” Maddy grinned, then her smile wavered a little, “But wait, you slept in the same bed?”

“Yeah, but not like that!” I blushed, “I mean, Brooks bi but like I’m not into her so nothing happened.”

“Oh right! Yeah!” Maddy said, laughing lightly. Something seemed off about her but I had trouble figuring it out.

I heard Brook sigh again.

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The rest of the lunch passed in a lighter tone, with all three of us delving into the ice breaking activity of bitching about the university we all went to. It was a fun time and I got to know Maddy a lot better during the time we sat in that booth. It was partially due to Brook that we were able to talk so much. Turns out having an extrovert in the conversation really helps smooth over those awkward silences.

In the end though, we had to go, and all three of us headed to the nearest bus stop. Maddy was taking the same bus as us, so we all sat together at the back and tried to keep our conversation at least vaguely quiet.

“I told her she should just swap major too! We still have a week til we go back! There’s time!” Maddy exclaimed, replying to Brook’s groaning about how I’d conceded to my parent’s wishes about what I’d study.

“Yeah definitely. Think about it over the week okay Elsie? Especially in light of everything that’s just happened. You’d be so great at it! I’ve seen those cute little doodles you did in class during high school,” Brook teased, bumping me affectionately with a hip.

“B-but… if they find out I’m so screwed!” I whined.

“Girl, you’re so screwed anyway if they find out you’re Emerged now,” she said compassionately.

I thought of what my father would say, with the backing singer that was my mother, and I felt my anxiety rising like a creeping darkness inside me. It sucked. Recently I’d begun to realise just how much my parents had fucked me up through their terrible parenting. It wasn’t anything overt, like sexual or physical abuse. It was an insidious toxifying presence in my life instead.

Brook must have seen my expression change because she gently put an arm around my slim shoulders and pulled my head to her own, “Hey, hey… you don’t have to okay? It’s just a thought. No need to get too worked up about it. Just think it over okay?”

I nodded mutely, unable to speak again as I normally was when I felt the evil spectre of my anxiety rear its ugly head.

“Oh… I’m sorry,” Maddy mumbled, wringing her hands, “I just thought. Nevermind, I’m sorry I brought it up.”

“Nah you’re good Maddy, she just gets like this when the subject of her parents comes up,” Brook reassured her.

“Okay… I’m sorry though. And crap it’s my stop. Uh I’ll um, I’ll text you Elsie?” she asked hopefully.

I smiled slightly and gave her a nod.

“Thank you! Oh! Right, bye!” she said as the bus came to a full halt.

We watched her bumble her way down onto the sidewalk, then turn and wave. We waved back.

“She is so fucking cute,” Brook said almost casually.

I sighed and watched Maddy bounce along the sidewalk behind us, “Yeah.”

Brook started to say something, and then thought better of it.

****

Getting back through the door to Brook’s place, we started for her room but Julian stopped us.

“Yo, how’s things Brook?” he asked from his position lounging on the couch.

“Pretty good, Elsie here Emerged last night so we went down to the OMR office and got her registered and shit,” she replied warily.

He nodded sagely, “Sick. Hey Elsie, you get any cool power’s with those freckles?”

I shook my head wordlessly and tried to hide further behind Brook without seeming like it.

“Ah damn. Still, I dig them. Looks good! Cute but not over the top,” he said with a yawn.

“You stayed up real late I’m guessing?” Brook laughed.

He nodded tiredly, “Yeah, Dillon wouldn’t let me go to bed until he felt like he’d won. However the fuck you win at Smash over a whole night of not keeping score.”

“I don’t know why you put up with him like that,” Brook sighed.

Julian grinned, “Someone’s got to push his buttons and get him mad. Plus, you don’t play games so he’s my only option.”

“Elsie’s a gamer, you could play with her whenever she comes over,” Brook offered without consulting me.

I squeaked and shook my head.

“Oh come on, you love games and stuff girl!” she teased.

Girl. Gosh, I was feeling very strange whenever I heard that pronoun.

“Nah if she doesn’t want to it’s cool. Smash ain’t for the faint of heart!” he joked.

“Yeah whatever nerd. Come on Elsie let’s go,” Brook groaned, rolling her eyes.

I allowed Brook to pull me by the hand to her room and she shut the door.

“Sorry… Anyway, what are we going to do with you?” Brook sighed.

“D-do with me?” I asked haltingly.

“Yeah, no offence but I don’t think you can stay here every night for all eternity. Do you think you can figure out how to change?” she asked apologetically.

“May as well start trying,” I said sadly, “Let me get back into my own clothes first.”

“Sure thing.”

I quickly changed out of the outfit that brook had lent me, then stood in the middle of her room staring at her, “What now?”

“I don’t know, you’re the one with powers!” she chuckled, “Try falling over.”

“Oh! Okay!” I nodded.

Taking a deep breath, I just allowed myself to tilt over into the air. With a rush, I felt my power well up and take over. It felt strange, like I was taking a huge breath, completely filling my lungs up. The power took me down seamlessly onto one knee, and I found my vision blocked by a hand. Wait, if one of my hands was on the ground, and one of my hands was delicately holding this hand, then who’s…

I heard a squeaking intake of breath from above me.

Oh my fucking god. I was kneeling and kissing Brooks hand. I scrambled backwards in a fright, only to end up twirling to a standing position with a flourish. Brook was standing there, her arm still outstretched and her eyes wide. Her face was beet red and her mouth hung open almost comically. I’d have teased her about it if my own face were not just as red.

“S-s-sorry!” I blurted, taking a step toward her.

“That was the power right?” she breathed.

“Yeah! I’m sorry!” I said nodding vigorously.

She swallowed and nodded, “Right, okay. Just the power. I guess falling over only works one way?”

I nodded and began to think, how would I turn back? Could it be as simple as concentrating really hard on being in my old body? May as well try. I thought of what it felt like to be in that body, the extra hair in strange places, the lack of two large boobs on my chest and the organ that hung between the legs. I thought of how it felt to have all of that, and I felt my body shift along with those thoughts.

Just like that I was standing here and my clothing suddenly fit me, and all the shit that came with this body was back. Except I felt something strange rise up in my mind this time. I felt… upset?

“Well, it worked I guess,” I said sadly.

My friend raised an eyebrow in question, “You’re sad about that?”

I couldn’t respond other than to shrug. I didn’t have the energy anymore.

“I guess… I guess I’ll go home now?” I asked softly.

“You’re welcome to stay a bit longer,” she said soothingly.

I shook my head, “Nah, I should get going.”

“Alright…” she said trailing off.

We said our goodbyes and after checking the lounge to see if Julian was still there, I made my escape out her window. The walk home caused my anxiety to rise and rise, like some awful game of jenga, where every block added to the top caused my mind to wobble. I was about to face my parents.

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