Fate: Dead Man’s Lament

Chapter 77: Episode 74


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A/N: For all the lonely bros out there on Valentine.

Here's my usual spiel:

You can read from Episode 77 to 108 (Plus Ep 109 should be up in a few hours, or tomorrow at the latest) in advanced and the Tier starts from as low as 1USD, try it out!

p a tr e on . com (/) LiamThePoor


Rin and I were separated just as we reached the courtroom, but we were still able to send each other reassuring nods, if only to ease the anxiety and pressure we were bound to feel. “Showtime…”

As expected, the courtroom we were brought to was both unnecessarily glamorous and stupidly expensive. I was talking gold-plated decorations, chandeliers adorned with gems, crystals and glittering ‘rocks’ that would make the entire Tohsaka Bloodline drool an ocean-worth of saliva. In fact, I was fairly certain that if I was to look in her direction, I’d find Rin staring all googly-eyed at the courtroom, which I supposed was a normal reaction?

After all, even I was somewhat surprised at the sheer extravagances they were showing off.

Seriously, was all this really needed? The floor alone seemed to have more value than the entire Tohsaka’s mountainside Mansion, disregarding the library and Workshop where their researches and centuries-worth of historical documents were stored, obviously. “I heard Judge Libra shall be presiding over your case, she’s most infamous for being harsh and biased against First-Gens… I’m sorry Leonis, but you and the Tohsaka Head have got your work cut out for you.”

Chris threw me an apologetic look of pity, like he was looking at goners, and it kind of pissed me off. ‘Is he doing this on purpose to unsettle me? Or is this simply to show his concern?’

You’re being paranoid, Leo-tan.

‘Have to, we’re basically knees-deep in enemy territory. Until they have shown me a reason to trust them, I’m assuming everyone is up and against us, regardless of how friendly or good they might seem.’

The Daemon replied laughingly. ‘Fair enough, but I don’t think he means you any harm, and I am usually pretty good at sensing this kind of things, so lighten up. Our boy Chris is just- He is trying to help in his own way. Hard as it is to believe, not everyone’s out to get you.

‘I’ll believe that when the Association isn’t on our asses.’ Still, we had enough enemies here, and it would not hurt anyone to be polite. “Thanks for the heads-up, Chrissy. When we’re done, let’s go hit up a pub, my treat obviously.”

The Enforcer sent me the barest hint of a smile. “You’re confident, I like that. I’ll take you up on that offer, when the case is over. Now, off you go, give those assholes Hell.”

“Judge Libra presiding… Please, be seated.”

“Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen. Thank you all for attending today’s session. Calling the case of the Association versus Fuyuki’s Second Owner, Head of House Tohsaka– Ms. Tohsaka Rin, and one Leonis Magnum who allegedly is a… First-Generation Magus.” The Judge, who was wearing a ridiculous, white, curly hair-piece, spoke. We just met, and already I could hardly stand her presence. “We’re here to determine the punishments for the defendants, fitting for their crimes.”

Not because of her uppity attitude, or the hairstyle, or even the permanent Karen’s expression seemingly glued to her face. You know, one of those aggressive ‘Get-me-your-manager’ look?

No-No. It was how the bitch phrased her sentences… This was not a Trial to determine our punishments, it was originally to determine if we even deserved a punishment in the first place, and Libra knew it.

She had to, she was the Judge presiding over the entire case, after all.

Yet, she chose to say it as though we were already judged guilty. That simple act might seem nonconsequential, but it made the atmosphere change drastically, and not in our favor I might add. ‘What kind of kangaroo-court is this?’

If this was any other situation, I’d have stood up and raged at the injustice, but that was beyond stupid. They were banking on us losing our cool. I did that, and they would have a good excuse to silence us. As for the Lawyer the Association granted us, I wouldn’t trust the bastard as far as I could throw him, which in all fairness, was actually pretty fucking far given my Stats. “But before we start… Mr. Wilson, if- if you may?”

A suited man stepped forth, looking less like the polite and professional Enforcer of the Laws he should be, and more an Idol stepping on stage to greet his crowds of adoring fans. His stone-cold gaze condescendingly sweeping the courtroom full of Mages, pausing when he set sight on Rin, his eyes narrowed in visible distaste, before eventually settling on me. “I’m sure with the exception of a… Few, most are already well-aware of the rules and regulations in this courtroom.”

Wilson spread his arms wide as he continued. “Unfortunately, some people here probably need to be educated as to how things work in an official setting.”

He raised his left hand arrogantly, the other fixing his round-glasses. “First, you shall not talk unless being directly addressed. Second, I don’t care what you think, how you feel or what kind of background you have, you’ll talk and act with respect while you’re in this courtroom. Third and lastly, you must remain calm and seated at all times, if there are even the slightest signs that you wish to disrupt the court, I will not hesitate to throw you out–”

The threats were made crystal-clear, if not by his words, then surely his voice was enough to send the message across. “– Or worse… Those are the only rules, usually they’re explained in a more sophisticated manner, but I like this better: Simple and direct, where I’m certain even a wild animal can understand and follow them. Any question?”

To my surprise, a few raised their hands with heart-shaped eyes, most were girls, but I could see two, three guys trying to gain Mr. Wilson’s attention as well. The Enforcer did not even acknowledge their existences, sparing the group of… Fans naught but a disdainful glance as he adjusted the glasses resting on his nasal bone. ‘Leo-tan, those glasses… They are–

‘Mystic Code, amazingly-crafted and made to suppress Sorcery Traits… His Mystic Eyes maybe?’ Quickly, I analyzed his features. Even I must admit Wilson was a very handsome guy, his appearance reminding me of Gilgamesh, not because he had similarities to the Golden Queen, but because his facial features were perfectly symmetrical, almost as though handcrafted by the Gods. Yet, that was not what drew my sight.

Instead, I focused on a familiar mole right under his left eye.

I, or he had seen that same mole before, albeit through a screen and animated. ‘Diarmuid of the Love-Spot… This guy must be one of his descendants, that’s- that’s not good–‘

“Mr. Magnum!” I snapped awake to find the entire courtroom seated, leaving me sticking out like a sore-thumb. “If you can not follow simple instructions, I’m afraid I’ll have to throw you out! Is that what you want?!”

The Judge– Ms. Libra if I remembered correctly, shouted as repeatedly banged her wooden-hammer, a Mystic Code likely enchanted to create the most horrendous sounds possible to the human-ears. I grimaced, slowly taking a seat. This was already not looking good for us, but I was able to keep cool and collected still, apologizing calmly. “My apology, Judge. I’m merely overwhelmed–”

I promptly ignored the loud snickers in the back. “– By the situation I’m in. It will not happen again, I can assure you.”

Sadly, Karen- I meant, Ms. Libra seemed hell-bent on chasing me out, “No! Somebody get this, this disrespectful fool out, I’ll not have him in this courtroom.”

Eyes narrowing, I questioned as the Enforcers moved in to apprehend me. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but there is a Strikes-System, is there not? This is my First-Strike, you can’t throw me out based on that alone. As an Official of the Clock Tower– The Heart of our World, surely you must know it is your duty and responsibility to act in accordance to the Association’s Laws?”

“I’m the Laws here, Mr. Magnum.” Was her reply.

“No, you’re not.” I challenged. “You’re a representative of the Laws, and thus you yourself are subjected to it, or it will set a dangerous precedent for futures cases…”

Some would say I was stupid to argue with the Judge given my circumstance, I’d say they’re incredibly dumb. From the moment she had walked in, Judge Libra was biased against us, there was no point in trying to win her over and if I allowed myself to be thrown out for something so trivial, I’d lose all control over the situation, and it would send the wrong impression, making me appear like a pushover to everyone present.

“What are you insinuating, Mr. Magnum?”

I shrugged nonchalantly. “I’m not insinuating anything, Your Honor. I’m simply stating facts, if you can ignore the Association’s Laws once, you can do it twice, and thrice, and so on so forth. If you can do it to a First-Gen like me, who’s to say you won’t do it to Heirs and Heiresses in the future? I beg you to tread carefully and keep your honor in tact, lest you invite troubles unto yourself.”

Forced to be polite with a discriminating idiot, the words tasted like ashes in my mouth as my throat tried to close up, as though the mere idea of treating Ms. Libra with respect was so revolting, so damaging to my Pride that the Elder Blood and [Hell King’s Engine] started to rear their ugly heads. I had to coax the Abilities sweetly just so I wouldn’t lose control of them like I did in the Airport. [Hell King’s Engine] I understood, but I never knew the Elder Blood to be so prideful.

Perhaps it’s being affected by my own emotions? Speaking of which, it was about time I found a way to tighten my control over [Hell King’s Engine]. That Skill was almost like an instinctive reaction rather than a switch I could turn on and off at will. “Are you threatening this Court, Mr. Magnum?”

Hurriedly, I shook and bowed, hair hiding a cheeky grin sprouting on my lips. Mages were arrogant, but they were even bigger stickers-for-rules. It’s no wonder Ms. Libra was shaking in her seat with anger at the mere insinuation. Rather ironic if you asked me, for a sub-species of Humanity who regularly broke the Laws of Gaia to cling so desperately to their own rules.

“No-No! I would not dare attempt such an idiotic act, Your Honor. I merely wish to remind you of your position… If you believe I’ve gone too far, I give you my sincerest apology and beg for forgiveness.”

With the Judge turning purple and the Jury chattering, chuckling incessantly, Wilson had to step in. “Enough, Order to the Court! Judge, I believe we’re straying from the main topics…”

Libra practically swooned at the man. ‘Ah, so that’s how it is. She’s enraptured by his Love-Spot, isn’t she?’

According to the Map, Wilson was still very much a Neutral despite his previous showings. Even now, he did not appear hostile, or at least his hostility was directed at the Jurors and Libra rather than Rin and I.

Libra purred. “You’re right, Mr. Wilson.”

Then, she glanced at Rin, before honing in on me. “Ms. Tohsaka, you’re hereby accused of negligence, harboring an Apostle in your territory and–”

Flipping through the papers lazily, Libra added after a brief moment. “– Endangering the fabrics of our Society… How do you plead, Ms. Tohsaka?”

“Not guilty, Your Honor.” The tsundere responded calmly.

“Oh? What about you, Mr. Magnum? You’re accused of aiding the Tohsaka Head in her crimes, how do you plead?” Head resting on her hands, Libra questioned with a look of indifference, to which I replied with the same amount of enthusiasm. “Not guilty, Your Honor.”

If she had phrased it differently, I was more than willing to admit I helped Rin, but a guilty admittance was the equivalent of agreeing with the crimes the Association had seen fit to hang over us. Of course, since the Mages were cunts, they could not allow us a smooth-sailing experience, not without fucking things up. Moments after we gave our answers, the door burst open and in came our… Lawyer.

Dressed in a black suit, the man was in his forties with receding hairline and graying strands fluttering behind him like the barber had it out for the guy. His nose was spotty with acnes and his face bumpy with acne-scars. He did not look reliable at all, a fact which he would immediately prove to us as his mouth opened. “Much apology, Your Honor. I was late, but my clients pleaded guilty and ask only for a more lenient punishmen–”

I interrupted with a snort. “No, we pleaded not guilty. I also don’t remember accepting you as our lawyer, Mr…?”

“Andrew, Mr. Magnum. And, as per the Association’s Laws–”

Again, I cut him off. “The Accused– In this case, we reserve the right to reject additional helps from the Tower’s lawyers. Please, leave.”

He laughed awkwardly. “Surely you can’t hope to defend yourselves? I’m a certified–!”

“I know you’re certified, I’m saying we don’t care. We have already rejected you, meaning Ms. Tohsaka and I are not your clients and you are not relevant to the case, that is unless you wish to stand witness?” I blew at my nails.

Andrew chuckled nervously as he approached me, stressing. “Your Honor, if I may speak to my clients.”

“You may.”

“Mr. Magnum, I’m trying to help you here, you and the Tohsaka Head.” Andrew said, sincerity flooding his features. He seemed so genuine, even I was almost fooled, yet a glance at the Map and seeing the blaring red representing him reminded me he was not in fact here to help, but to harm. “The higher-ups want your heads, they want the Tohsaka to assimilate into their Bloodline to ensure a spot in the next Grail War… You. Need. Me.”

I smiled. “No, we don’t.”

The Association’s Judgements are based on two factors. First was obviously the Judge, and second was the Jurors. Only if both agreed on a punishment would it be passed, so they must reach a compromise. I could not rely on Libra as the Judge, but I could try and appeal to the Jury, or their interests at least, and in order to do so, I could not have this idiot here ruining things for me.

“Can someone escort Mr. Andrew out, I believe he’s here to disrupt our business. The quicker he leaves, the sooner we can finish this and get on with our lives.” Waving at the Enforcers, I kept a tight, irritated smile on my lips that clearly displayed my annoyance. “Are you mad?! You can’t–”

“I can, I am. I’m willing to have you as our Lawyer, but only if you’re trying to help wholeheartedly, and you aren’t.”

“You- You’ll regret this, I am–”

“No, I won’t.” I sent the man a deprecating smirk. “I’ll definitely regret letting you represent us though, that much I know.”

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The Enforcers finally arrived, no idea what took them so long when they were barely twelve feet away, but they did come and drag Andrew along. The man huffed, shaking the guys off as he stormed towards the double-doors, glaring at me all the while. “You’ll regret this…”

“I won’t.” I mouthed back, before saying aloud flippantly, sass thick in my voice. “Goddamn, ain’t that something? Geez, that Andrew guy was a real piece of work… Wouldn’t you agree, Your Honor?”

“Enough of your jokes, Mr. Magnum.” Libra gestured at the Enforcers. “Can somebody please administrate him the Truth-Potion so we can get this whole ordeal over with?”

Seconds later, I was strapped securely to my seat. I tried tugging my limbs, but the leather-restraints were surprisingly tough, likely to account for the reinforced Strength of Mages. It did little to stop external uses of Magecraft, but against someone whose focus was on the strengthening and alteration of the Body? Yeah, it would work as a decent obstacle.

Once I was bound, the Enforcers began to pump me full of glittering, blue-chemicals that burnt to the touch and made my veins bulge angrily as though inflamed. Immediately, I bit down on the mixture of drugs hidden inside my teeth. The effects were instantaneous, a haze of drowsiness settling over my mind as I felt the invading liquids travel up my veins and to my brain.

Being high on two different stuffs were surprisingly fun,

It was not too dissimilar from being drunk and high on the Devil’s lettuce at the same time, albeit somewhat more intense than I had initially expected.

“Fuck…” I slurred, the words coming out so naturally I couldn’t quite stop them– Or rather, I did not want nor feel the need to. What’s weirder that all efforts to use self-hypnotization seemed useless, like I was attempting to futilely grab a handful of sands and keep it within my grasp to no avail. “This ish- This ish pretty- pretty fucking good…”

Eyelids getting heavier by the second, I could barely register the words thrown my way. “Can you tell us your full name, where you’re born and your date of birth?”

I laughed, the urge to spill my real origin was simply overwhelming, but I managed to still keep a lid on it, instead allowing my scattered-brain to conjure up the most absurd response. “Leonis, Leonis Magnum. No fucking clue where, but- but I’m assuming it’sh Fuyuki? Aye, give me moar of this, this drug.”

“What’s going on with him?” Libra questioned, lips twitching.

The Enforcers traded looks that clearly displayed their disbelief. “… There’s- There’s no more. This dose is enough to make a the hardest of men spill their beans, and it should not have caused intoxication? I- I don’t know what’s going on either.”

“What’sss happening, is Ms. Judgy wants Mr. Frown’s cock.” I bit my lower-lip to keep the cackles down to… Varying levels of success. “Ha… Hahaha! Libra and Wilson, sitting on a tree! K-I-S-S–!”

“Somebody shut him up!” She’s blushing! Awww…! How adorable.

“Gag the little bastard up, dammit!”

“But- But we need him to confess, that’s why we–!” The Enforcer argued, only be stopped by Libra’s screech. “If I tell you to gag him, just do it!”

Oopsie... I said that out loud, didn’t I? “Yes, yes you did.”

Chris, who was pulling the needles from my arms chuckled, and I burst into laughter amidst the Jury’s chattering. “Ahhh… Shit. Shorry Ms. Judgy, I didn’t- didn’t mean it.”

“Haul him out already!” Left with no other choices, the Enforcers released the restraints around the- my arms and legs, trying to drag me out, failing when I yanked. My Stats were at the peak of human-limits in Nasu, and even with my failing grasp over my own Mana, the Enforcers could not quite take hold of me. Drunkenly, I dodged and weaved my way to the witness-stand. “I’m aight- I’m aight! Asssk away!”

Fingers pointing at Ms. Judgy, I shouted. “I ain’t going anywhere! It’sh un- un- unlawful to chase me out. I has to shtay to- to defend myself!”

That served only to anger Ms. Judgy even more, and somewhere deep inside the haze, the little remains of my stone-cold sober consciousness, couldn’t help but laugh. ‘All according to plan.’

You have a plan?

—— [Fate: DML] ——

Rin put a hand over her eyes, a poor attempt to distract herself from the embarrassing experience. Leo had told her he could resist it, but seeing him now, the Tohsaka Head found it genuinely hard to believe. “Why is this happening? Truth-Potions are not supposed to have this effect…? It should have made Leo space out at most, not whatever this is!”

The Enforcer beside her frowned as well, muttering. “Perhaps it’s drugged with something else? No, no. Our supplies are secured and our procedures are very strict, someone would have noticed if these were tampered with.”

“Then why is he–?!” She drawled, looking at her friend who was running around the courtroom, dodging the pursuing Enforcers with expert-movements and nimbleness that would make a cat jealous. “– Why is he like that?!”

“I- I don’t know?”

“Wait… Shouldn’t you be helping them capture Leo?”

“Probably?”

“Why aren’t you helping?”

“I- Uhmm- I don’t know…?”

Hands slamming the table harshly, Rin stared at the seemingly anxious Enforcer. “Then what do you know? How are you even an Enforcer of the Clock Tower?!”

Unexpectedly, the man did not attempt to defend his honor, responding with a nervous shrug. “I’m going to be honest and say I have no idea, I didn’t even pass the standard tests they usually gave Enforcers. I think they’re just desperate since people don’t want to risk their lives in the fields anymore.”

“Oh Gods…” Face frozen in disbelief, Rin slowly slumped down her seat, hands reaching up to massage her temples. To say the Clock Tower had been a disappointment was a massive understatement. The twin-tailed tsundere had grown up with tales of elegance, of sophisticated men and women who were always professional. Yes, she knew there was a culture of corruption in the Association.

Yes, she was aware that most Mages cared not for others, only their benefits.

But this, this was simply ridiculous, it was far, far beyond unprofessionalism,

So far in fact that the Tohsaka Head felt her mental image of the (in)famous Clock Tower shattering to a million pieces and bits.

“… I has to shtay to- to defend myself!” Her intoxicated friend exclaimed, though in this state, she genuinely doubted he was even capable of forming coherent thoughts, let alone defend their actions. Sighing, Rin stood and gestured at Leo, a tightly-knitted, forced smile spotted over her lips. “Leo… Please, come here.”

“Rin-chan!” Her friend raced towards her, arms wide open as though wanting to draw her in a hug. Then, he stumbled down the witness-stand, tumbling in a boneless heap, thumbs raised. “I’m- I’m okay, I think?”

“Damn, this is more funny than I expected.” The Enforcer she was having a conversation with prior mumbled, and she couldn’t help but ask. “Why are you still here?! Go do something useful!”

“You know, you’re being very judgy for an Accused.”

“Excuse me for expecting you to do your job!” Rin scowled at the man, before turning to face Leonis as he struggled to keep himself straight. “Rin! Msh- Ms. Judgy’s three sizes are super fucking big! I’m talking like, huge! That robe doesn’t do her justice at all.”

“How does he know Judge Libra’s sizes?!” If the sheer absurdity of the situation was not enough, it was further heightened by the Judge, who screamed and shrieked shyly as Leo blew a kiss at Mr. Wilson, winking teasingly at the stoic Enforcer. “Yee- Yee’re one lucky son of a bitch, Mr. Wilshon! Dem ass-cheeks are huge!”

‘Just smite me already, I don’t want to live anymore…’ Falling to her knees, Rin crumbled on the spot, all while her friend made a grabbing-motion at the Judge. “You- You bloody simpleton! You barbaric, lustful beast! You disgusting, lowlife leech! How dare you?! I’ll strike you dead!”

Mana flared in her palms, the Judge turned the floor in rows upon rows of spikes seeking to impale the young Magus, who merely laughed tauntingly at the effort as he disappeared in a cloud of cyan particles and green petals. “You- *Burp*- You miss, ya schmuck!”

The Jury gasped, chattering getting louder as they tried to speculate what Leonis just did. While Teleportation was not an impossible feat, to do it while intoxicated and with such little effort was nigh unheard of.

“I’m going to kill you!” The Judge abandoned her seat, jumping at the boy as he bolted in Rin’s direction. “Shave me Rin! That Judge’s crazy, she tryna’ silence me!”

Desks were thrown, chairs sent flying and decorations destroyed as the entire room devolved into absolute chaos. What was once a prim and proper Court was now a mess where Spells were being traded left, right and center. As for the main culprit– Leonis Magnum, he was laughing as [Blink], his Teleportation Spell transported him from one corner to the other. “Enough. Order to the Court...!”

A calm voice reached Rin’s ears, though she could tell that calmness was merely a façade to hide the rising anger bubbling beneath. A façade that was breaking with every moment this Chaos continued, before inevitably… “SHUT. UP! ALL OF YOU!

Mr. Wilson, the man who had remained silent the entire time stomped, leaving a car-size crater on the ground. The fragments shot out in all directions, yet miraculously did not hit anyone. Faster than she could blink, the Enforcer was by Leo’s side, hand raised to strike at his nape in hope of knocking the Incarnation of Chaos out, but he was a tad too slow, or was Leo too fast?

Rin didn’t know, she didn’t care either. She could only look on in horror as her friend and the Enforcer began trading blows that left the courtroom shaking like an earthquake was taking place. The first of these blows caused a shockwave that tore the extravagantly decorated room in complete ruin, the second and third punched holes in the walls and rattled the protective Bounded Fields.

It could be her imagination, but Rin could swear she saw the barest hint of a smirk spot on Wilson’s lips, before it was swiftly wiped away so quickly, she had to question her eyes. Space itself seemed to bend, warped as Wilson’s fists grazed the intoxicated boy’s cheeks, drawing blood under her friend’s astonished gaze. He could hide his reaction from those who did not know him, but not from her.

Leonis was surprised to see someone who could match him physically, and he wasn’t the only one.

Rin was too…

She could understand if Wilson was descended from a Phantasmal Species, but their descendants usually had a tell, a physical anomaly that showed their status as a half-bred– For Oni, it was their eyes, or sometimes horns. For Dragons, again eyes, horns and maybe scales, yet Wilson had none of that, which could mean a few possibilities, though the conclusion easiest to draw was, “Demigod… Is Mr. Wilson a–”

“Yes, he’s the distant descendant of Diarmuid Ua Duibhne– Or the Knight of the Love Spot. Wilson’s really famous in the Tower thanks to his access to his Ancestor’s Noble Phantasm, the twin-spears that can cut Mysteries themselves.”

Sure enough, the moment that fact was made known, the Enforcer summoned the red and yellow spears– Gáe Buidhe and Gáe Daerg, both wrapped in a layer of thin, discolored cloth. Of course, her friend couldn’t allow himself to lose out, hands grabbing at the swords he so often wielded and they clashed, tearing entire sections of the courtroom apart with a single slash.

“Court is adjourned. We’ll continue when a more professional Judge is assigned to the case.” Wilson unsummoned his spears, staring in amusement at a confused Leo. “I- I thought we’re fighting?”

“No. There’s no point, I have what I came here for.”

The Judge jumped forth to protest,

The words dying in her throat as the stoic Enforcer glared, retrieving a Emblem from his pocket. “Ms. Libra, by order of Lorelei Barthomeloi, you're hereby suspended, your position as an Official of the Association will be revoked for unprofessionalism. Whether you can regain it or not will depend on your future actions and performance, understood?”

“Why’s the Queen interested in this case?!” It was not Rin who asked, but she couldn’t deny being curious about the matter as well.

“Sir Wilson, I- I–!” The Judge– Former Judge stammered, only to be silenced by Wilson. “Are you defying Lady Barthomeloi’s orders?”

“I- I wouldn’t dare, Sir.”

“Then it is done, Court is adjourned.”

That was how the first day of their Trial ended, and as Rin returned to her assigned room, escorted by a group of giggling Enforcers, she still couldn’t shake off the question plaguing her mind: ‘What the fuck just happened?’

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