“Is he okay? Doesn’t he need to see the doctor? Or…” I began to whisper as I got worried, and Rian smiled to relieve me.
“He’s just tired. He’s a very special person, so he doesn’t usually get sick. He’s fine.”
No way. Even if you are a special person, you still get sick. I didn’t feel good about Rian talking like it was nothing when the Crown Prince was sleeping like a dead man, and I protested without realizing it.
“There’s no way he’s fine. He’s human too, and it would be hard for him to skip sleeping. Fatigue can consume you from the inside even if you look strong outside. You shouldn’t assume so easily like that.” I snapped at him sharply.
Rian replied with a bit of a bitter smile, “It’s the first time, Marin, for you to show your emotions like that.”
I then realized I overdid it and quickly apologized, “I’m sorry. You didn’t do anything wrong. I didn’t mean to go harsh on you.”
Rian then made a teasing smile and said, “If you are really sorry, can we go take a walk outside together?”
“Oh, sure.”
It was going to be an intermission soon. I nodded as I was really sorry, and he took me to the balcony towards the corner of the theater. The balcony, which was made to be a resting area, had a door so we could be alone. It was quiet with only the sound of bugs, and the outside of the theater could be heard faintly.
“Rian, I’m really sorry about earlier…”
Rian shook his head at my apology. “It’s okay. Don’t think too much about what’s in the past. Actually, I have something I truly wanted to tell you right now.”
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I nodded at his sudden words, and his expression turned serious as he looked at me a bit nervously.
“I know you will find it shocking soon, but I figured it might be too late at this rate, which is killing me, so I can’t drag this any longer.”
What was it that I was going to find shocking? I looked at him with curiosity in my eyes.
He asked me in an ever more serious voice, “Marin, I’m always glad and happy in every moment with you. What do you think of me?”
At once, I, too, became serious like his face. I wasn’t a fool and knew what those confession-like words meant. What do I think of him?
“Me too.”
To me, he was the man who gave me a sweet dream and a man of admiration. He’s with me, smiling and talking, but still feels like he’s at the top of a high tower, distant from me, like a prince of the spire. I, who was lacking in every way except in official rank, found it miraculous to even maintain a “friendship” with such a man. Well, if it were me who had the ambition to become an officer to succeed out of spite, I would have accepted his proposal right away. But I’ve changed a lot now.
“I am happy, glad, and feel like I’m some amazing person when I’m with you. But that’s not happiness that I achieved with my own abilities.”
The duchess. It was an astonishing seat of power that I could take when I had a not-so-great place within the center. But if that happened, then I would be left as the wife of the successor to the Duke of Siccain, not as Secretary Marina. I had an interest in him, but I didn’t want to give up my dream for him.
And strangely, in this situation… I was worried about the wellness of the Crown Prince, who fell asleep as if he had fainted. Was it really alright that he could fall asleep outside the palace?
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