Ch7 - The bait that catalysed my descent

The air was unbearably hot and my breathing was rough. I bit down on the hem of my shirt, stuffing a leather jacket to my face and desperately tried to inhale its scent.

The fading cologne was already nearly imperceptible, as apart from the smell that originally lingered in the closet there was almost no other scent. In the heat, overwhelmed by my emotions, my mind became increasingly clouded. 

Sheer slivers of sweat ran down my forehead in rivulets, as the tip of my tongue soaked the fabric pressed against me.

Not enough, it still wasn’t enough…

 

 

The growing impatience that was unable to satiated led me to casting away the jacket as I hurriedly clutched the pocket square against my nose, breathing in its air rapidly, like I was an asthma patient.

When the air tainted by tobacco came flowing through my lungs, it was as if I had been electrocuted, and a sense of euphoria spread throughout my body. 

My eyes shuttered abruptly as my body slumped, falling onto the bed as if I were embraced by clouds. I loosened my bite on the handkerchief as I peeked through half lidded eyes at the ceiling and the antique fan installed, fatigue lacing my breaths.

 

I placed the handkerchief over my face and through the fine gossamer fabric, everything appeared to be masked by a haze.

The first time I dreamt of making love with Sheng Min Ou, I woke abruptly in fear, finding myself covered in sweat and patches of stickiness. Gripped by guilt over what I had dreamt of, the feeling of shame had seared its way into my heart, and all I wanted to do was take the dream into the grave with me, never thinking about it again.

However, things did not always go as one wished. The more fervently one tried to suppress or resist it, the harder it was to ignore.

 

During class, when I ate, when I showered, any moment when my brain could switch off it became vulnerable to the thoughts. If there really was a devil on earth, this absurd yet lustful dream would be the bait that catalysed my descent.

And Qi Yang, would be the arrow that catapulted me into the abyss.

I couldn’t make out what I desired, perplexed by my feelings for Sheng Min Ou and this uncertainty fuelled my insomnia. Finally, I decided one day that I had to know for myself and give myself closure.

 

I skipped the self study periods after school to go find Sheng Min Ou, and when I stepped into the worn down apartment it was the anxiousness in my heart and a foreboding feeling that  made me approach his place with light footsteps. 

When I reached his floor, a weak light spilled from his corridor and I heard the sounds of two men arguing.

“Qi Yang, stop coming here to piss me off.”

The tips of my ears moved slightly, I would never mistake this voice, it was Sheng Min Ou.

“Don’t make me leave… I know what kind of person you are, don’t worry, I can accommodate for you, I can accept you unconditionally… “ 

We’re sorry for MTLers or people who like using reading mode, but our translations keep getting stolen by aggregators so we’re going to bring back the copy protection. If you need to MTL please retype the gibberish parts.

The other voice was also very familiar, especially the feigned tenderness, it made my stomach hurl. It was that psycho indeed.

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“You can do anything to me, as long as you’re happy, I won’t ever resist…” Qi Yang slowly sank to his knees, yanking his shirt up, exposing his bare abdomen. 

I don’t know what was there, but Sheng Min Ou looked at it for a long moment without his gaze leaving, as if he was shocked… also as if he had been entranced.

Qi Yang’s face showed a smile as if he had prevailed, and reached out for Sheng Min Ou’s hand. As if he was a devout disciple of Sheng Min Ou, he kissed the tips of his fingertips with utmost sincerity.

 

“You can drink my blood like it is wine, you can treat my flesh like dough and treat me however you want on the bed, you can express your desires fully on my scars…” He reluctantly let go of Sheng Min Ou’s fingers and instead reached out with a clear objective in mind, as he caressed the part that had reacted to his speech.

“I will let out the most chilling screams, crying as I plead for mercy, mercy for something I crave.” Qi Yang continued with his seduction, as he undid the zipper, greed clouding his eyes, his anticipation evident, “A-Sheng, I love you… I love you so much…” 

My eyes widened as my fingers gripped the doorframe of the emergency exit so hard they became white. In my mind were countless voices, screaming incessantly for me to go dropkick Qi Yang that psycho, and make him stay away from Sheng Min Ou.

Everything in front of me was tinged with blood red in my anger, and just when I decided to bash the shit out of the psycho, Sheng Min Ou was faster and sent him flying with one kick.

Qi Yang collided with the walls on the other side of the corridor, and held his stomach as he curled up into fetal position, painful moans escaping him, as if he were under great agony.

Yet, he was still able to smile, “Yes, just like this…” He coughed then continued, “Don’t hold yourself back…” 

Sheng Min Ou’s eyes darkened, as he laughed callously, “You think you understand me?” He stood there, and unhurriedly brought up his zipper. After he was done, he said two words in a measured tone, “Fuck off.”

He walked back into his room and slammed the door shut with excessive force, causing the dull light on the ceiling to shake.

Qi Yang stared intently at the closed door and started to laugh maniacally as he clutched his abdomen, his blood slowly seeping out through the shirt, dyeing the fabric red.

Serves him right. 

A smirk crept into my expression, as I felt greatly satisfied by the turn of events.

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Qi Yang looked as though he wouldn’t be leaving in a while, and Sheng Min Ou did not look as if he was in the mood to hold a proper conversation with me. After weighing up the pros and cons, I decided to go home first and then decide on what to do.

Once I reached the bottom floor of the building, I turned around again to look at the room which Sheng Min Ou rented. There, the light still shone, a light that was as ordinary as can be, yet it seemed to be imbued with some kind of magic power, alluring me to keep gazing at it.

The riddles which Qi Yang and Sheng Min Ou spoke in made me irritated, as if there was a world, one where only they could enter and I was blocked off outside. 

Like Qi Yang, once I had also believed that I understood Sheng Min Ou very well, but it looked like that was not the truth. I was just another person that had been on the receiving end of Sheng Min Ou saying “You only think you understand me.”

After coming home, due to the homeroom teacher reporting to my mother that I had cut revision periods, I faced half an hour of fanatic admonishment.

She said, she sacrificed so much because of me, so why couldn’t I be more mature and behave better? She then brought up my dad, saying it was easy for him because he had passed already, and now he wouldn’t have to spend his life tirelessly trying to raise me right.

To get away from her constant reprimanding, I escaped into the bathroom. 

“If only you were as good as studying as Sheng Min Ou, then I would be at peace!” Her voice bellowed as it came through the door.

I splashed cold water on my face, memories from my dreams and reality interweaving with each other. In one moment, it would be the fierce, vehement breaths of Sheng Min Ou unfurling next to my ear, then a moment later I would see Qi Yang’s eyes, his gaze lingering in the empty corridor.

 

Droplets of water dripped from strands of my hair as I propped myself up against the basin and lifted my head. For a brief moment I was dazed, if it wasn’t because of my features being my own, the same one I had seen for the past ten something years, then I might have mistaken the reflection for Qi Yang and thought he had stalked me home.

The mirror reflected my appearance, my skin pale, the rims of my eyes red and my lips tightly pressed together, making my gaze look even more sinister. 

My eyes and Qi Yang’s were so similar it was almost indistinguishable. Greed, envy, admiration… these eyes contained all the feelings I contained for Sheng Min Ou. Why did I even think of going to him to seek an answer, when it was plainly written in my eyes all this time?

I was the same as the psychopath Qi Yang.

Acknowledging this fact made my heart palpitate, and under the swell of my emotions I raised my fist at the mirror, shattering its surface.

Blood flowed through the cracks, forming a web of red as it trickled slowly and dripped down on the basin. My mother heard of the commotion and hurriedly came through the door, and screamed in horror at what I had done. 

“Xiao Feng, blood… blood! How could you be so reckless… I was just talking to myself… I won’t say that again.”

She thought it was what she said that hurt my feelings, and from then on she never compared me to Sheng MIn Ou again.

She didn’t know that my ego was fine, what was on the verge of collapse, was my belief that for the past ten something years my feelings for Sheng Min Ou was that of ‘brotherly love’.

After finding out that Fang Lei was the person that picked the flowers out from Sheng Min Ou’s garden, I paid him extra attention. Every time he came to the pawn shop, I would make additional conversation with him. After a while, even Shen Xiao Shi started to notice something was up and asked me if I had fallen to ‘Sha Ge’s’ charm, otherwise why would I appear exceptionally happy every time he came? 

Here, he was clearly exaggerating. At most I was just a little excited, it wasn’t to the extent where I would label it as being happy.

“…He wants to leave, but the CEO isn’t willing to let him go, so it’s at a stalemate right now. If you asked me, what’s wrong with staying at the company you’re going to take over anyways, it’s so hard to try and start your own business.”

Fang Lei’s expressions were very animated as he spoke about him and his pale, rich, and beautiful client. When he mentioned Sheng Min Ou, he elaborated on what had happened and detailed the events at great lengths. To summarise, Sheng Min Ou wanted to leave Mei Teng to start up his own company, and his fiancee’s father did not approve.

Sheng Min Ou only got to where he was because of the CEO, so he could not make a big deal out of the situation, therefore leaving them at a temporary statemate. 

“Not everyone is like you and relies on a sugar mummy.” Shen Xiao Shi joked, “Did that beauty really fall in love with you?”

“Just yesterday she mentioned eloping to Europe.” Fang Lei said with a smile, “I’m starting to feel sorry for her fiance, his soon to be father-in-law thinks of him as a business asset, and his woman is thinking of eloping with another man. Apart from his job, he doesn’t have any other hobbies, what a failure of a life hahahaha….”

I stared at his laughing face and leaned back against the chair, finding a small chuckle escaping me as well.

“Yeah, it is a bit of a failure.” 

During my ten years in prison, I was closest with three people, Wei Shi, Shen Xiao Shi, and Monkey.

The day I came out of prison, Wei Shi and Shen Xiao Shi both came to pick me up. Monkey wasn’t able to make it as he was busy camping in a discreet spot over in another city, waiting for his paparazzi scoop on celebrities and the like.

 

Monkey was not his real name either, it was just that he was of a small build and had thick facial hair, similar to a monkey, so we called him that.

Monkey disliked it when people called him his real name, because his real name was Yi Da Zhuang, and each time someone called him ‘Da Zhuang’, he would always think the other person was mocking him. 

Before Monkey went into Prison, he had been working in the line of private investigation. Although, different to Sherlock Holmes and Hercule Poirot, he was not involved in homicide cases, but rather specialised in helping the wealthy investigate whether there was any suggestion of infidelity.

Once, he had been helping a wealthy lady take pictures of her husband cheating on her with a young mistress in a private mansion, when he accidentally got caught by the security guards there. In one hit, he broke their nose. Once he was exposed, the wealthy lady who had hired him immediately drew a line between them two, denying any involvement. Under the charges of assault and illegal trespassing, he ultimately had to pay a settlement fee and was sentenced to prison for one and a half years.

Due to the nature of his profession, he had witnessed all sorts of dramatic events. He also had a talent for performing, so naturally after a while, he became Cell 67’s publicly acknowledged stand up comedian.

After eating, whenever we had time for breaks, anywhere that had a trace of him would be filled with endless entertaining sketches. It was to the point where after he had finished his one and a half years of sentencing and left the cells, Wei Shi, Shen Xiao Shi and myself would still continue to miss him dearly. 

After Monkey left prison, he decided to quit his old profession, and changed career paths to collect paparazzi scoops instead.

I thought it was a pretty solid choice, as it was a profession where he could transfer some of his old skills.

After I left prison, despite adding him as a friend on WeChat, aside from the occasional ‘likes’ i gave him on his status updates, and sending the obligatory new year greetings, we rarely spoke to idly conduct chit-chat.

So when I dialled his number and asked him to come out to negotiate a contract, he seemed a bit startled. 

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