It had been a couple of hours since Gael dropped Angela off in front of the restaurant, and she felt like it had been eons ago. How they ended their conversation earlier really bummed her out. She debated with herself several times whether she should send him a text to check up on him, but every time she picked up her phone from the table, she'd put it right back down.
She didn't have to wait for her best friend Nina for long as the latter arrived ten minutes later. With her usual cup of cappuccino, she sipped on it while ruminating on her current situation with her friend. She had wanted to unload everything to someone for a while now. She only got the chance during their meetup. The one good thing about having Nina was that she didn't judge her even though whatever she did or was doing was a mistake.
Of course, Nina would whip her butt if ever she did something really crazy, but her friend was the only one she allowed to be really real with her.
Playing with the cake crumbs on the saucer with her fork, Nina curiously probed, "You're aware that Vincent likes you…"
Nina didn't sound like she was questioning—rather, only making sure that Angela was, in fact, not blind. "Of course, I'm not an idiot. I mean, he did outright tell me his interest in seeing me again during that lunch date."
"And you told him you aren't interested in dating?"
"Specifically, I told him that while I appreciated the fact that he was interested, I didn't want anything at the moment. I didn't lie to him. I told him about the dates that my father set me up with every weekend. He obviously knew that as he was the first one I met right after I arrived back from the island, remember? He's perfectly aware of where I stand."
"And that is…"
"That I'm not going to date. So the best I can offer him is friendship."
"What did he say?"
Angela shrugged. "He nodded. He was very understanding actually, saying that he wasn't really looking for something serious—"
"So, he's only looking for a fûck buddy." Nina interrupted. "Damn. With that face and that physique, I'm certain he has women falling over his feet 24/7. I'd sign up anytime—no strings attached guaranteed!"
Throwing her head back and laughing, Angela shook her head. "You're insane. I didn't say that—well, he didn't say that. He just said that it had been a while since his last serious relationship, but he wasn't in a hurry. He just felt like he could start testing the waters in the dating game again."
"So…okay. So you were clear that you're not looking to date, but he still invited you for tomorrow's party—in exchange for a favor that you're keeping a secret from me." Nina rolled her eyes. "It's either he really likes you, and he's persistent...or he has really accepted being in the friend zone."
Angela sipped the last of her drink. It went cold, but she still enjoyed it nonetheless. "Vincent's a nice guy."
"But he's not...Gael?"
She threw her friend a look. Nina had a shit-eating grin on her face. There were very few things that she could hide from her. She cleared her throat. "I didn't say that."
"But you were thinking about it," Nina said as-a-matter-of-factly.
"I'm not." Angela groaned, annoyed at her situation—more like annoyed at herself for not knowing what to do. She wished there was a manual that would tell her what to do. "Look… I was wrong...I think. I shouldn't have gone home with him. I shouldn't have agreed to stay in his place."
"You feel bad?"
"The opposite. I feel good being around him—despite the effed-up situation we're in. I can't understand how I'm able to be in the same car...in the same room...the same house. We even laugh and joke sometimes. But it's just… It's both easy and so hard being around him. It's so confusing. Gael is a great guy but so...so wrong for me."
The table was quiet for a minute. The music playing in the restaurant was quite ironic, given their conversation. Mr. Wrong by Mary J Blige—the song was about knowing that the guy was wrong for you but it felt like you're making the right decision.
Instead of answering Angela's question, Nina ventured to a topic they discussed in the past. "Didn't he ask for a do-over?"
But Angela also didn't know how to answer her best friend exactly. She also asked herself what the hell she and Gael were doing now. "That barely means anything, Nin. A do-over could mean being friends again like he said. Basically a clean slate. He doesn't even tell me what he really wants. He's sweet and thoughtful, but I can always sense he's holding back at times—not that I'm expecting him to do something. And it's not like I'm going to cross the bridge either if he ever tries. Lord knows I've tried that and got burned."
As if always knowing what was needed to be said, Nina smiled sadly. "But you just can't help yourself, can you?"
Angela let out a long sigh. Resting her chin on top of her arms that were on the table. "I'm screwed."
Nina patted her best friend's arm. She could understand what she was going through. She had her fair share of unfortunate events in the love department. "Look. Despite what I heard about this guy, he seems to really care about you. And it's not wrong that you want to feel safe and it's certainly not wrong to lean into someone who can help sometimes. Why don't you stay? At least until you move to that temporary apartment or when that agent calls you for that available condo downtown. Just suck it up for two more nights."
"It's not like I have a choice." Technically, she did, but that would only prompt more complications. She could find a hotel, but she was sure that her brother would find out as soon as she'd check-in.
"Have you told Oli about Evan?"
"Do I have to?"
"It would be a wise decision."
"You can't tell him where I'm staying right now. He'll flip."
"Then you'd better tell him fast about your move, or he's gonna flip if he hears it from someone else."
Nina was right. Angela had to tell her brother about Evan finding out about her apartment. "I should just move out of state. Better yet—out of the country."
"Oooh. Let's go to Korea! I've always wanted to meet some handsome oppas." Nina wiggled her brows.
"If… ever I move. You'd move with me?"
"Hell yeah I would! What kind of question is that?"
"As if your father would allow you to move out of the country—much less the state." Angela shook her head.
"Hey, you're no better. But that doesn't stop us. Remember fourth grade when I wanted to run away from home, and you ran away with me?"
Angela nodded as she laughed. "We stole our dad's wallets and used their credit card to book a hotel and order room service."
The two best friends cracked up at the memory of how stupid they were when they were kids.
"That was the best and the worst run away ever," said Nina. When they were quiet again, she faced her best friend and told her, "Okay, in all seriousness… Gael's kind and hot—who are we kidding? But...you also know that you can't have more than just this...fling or whatever this unusual relationship you have going on, don't you?"
That's the thing. Angela didn't know how to answer. Before Gael showed up in front of her a few weeks ago, she was dead set on forgetting about him. But now…she honestly wasn't sure anymore. And it made her nervous that the more she denied the nagging feeling in her heart, the more it scraped her—to the point that she started to feel it clawing her chest.