I was left with Ladambor, the Carrion Golem, and Melasbo, the Chimera Borpillar. Ladambor sat on its haunches, its knuckles pawing the ground. Melasbo raised a third of its segmented body high, casting tall shadows across the room with the blinking machines behind it. The two of them stared at me. I awkwardly stood still, looking around the laboratory for anything to do while waiting for Bawu to return.
"Uh...hello there!" I waved at them. "How are the hours here, guys? Is the pay good?"
The Carrion Golem snorted. The Chimera Borpillar clicked its mandibles, tilting its head left and right as it curiously inched forward.
"How much do you get per hour? Or is your pay only food and lodging? Do you have any benefits? You should be aware of your rights as experiments and get appropriate remuneration. If you're not properly compensated for getting turned into monsters, you should sue Bawu and—"
The Carrion Golem let out a low growl and thumped its fists on the ground.
"Okay, okay, I take that back," I said. "I’m just saying that as test subjects here…" I didn't finish my sentence as my eyes landed on the vats behind the Melasbo and the flashing machines.
Test subjects. The village guards!
Mad Brewer Bawu wasn't here, only her pets. Could I do something to save them?
I cautiously approached the vats.
The Carrion Golem watched me as I passed but didn't get up from the floor. I continued forward, walking around the large body of the Chimera Borpillar, giving a wide berth to the limbs of different creatures sticking out from its sides. It also didn't try to stop me.
Then I squeezed myself between the large machines, taking care not to step on the pipes and the cables on the ground. I reached the vats without any issue.
"Now what?" I rapped my knuckles on the glass. It sounded sturdy and thick. That’s what she said. "Are you still alive over there?"
The leader guard didn't respond. But the Carrion Golem did.
A guttural growl filled the cavern. Knuckles drummed on the floor as it came over to check on me. Scuttling from the many limbs of the Chimera Borpillar followed.
I flinched at the grating sound of metal skidding on hard rock. Bawu's pets pushed aside the machines behind to come closer. Their broad shadows blanketed me, and their enormous forms faintly reflected on the glass of the vats.
"Yep, that's a very secure container.” I didn't turn around, pretending to be innocently watching my former party mates, who were now on their way to becoming monsters. Other kinds of monsters.
From the perspective of humans, Mardukryons were monsters. But from the view of Mardukryon, we were the normal ones.
Ladambor growled again, and I got the message. I innocently whistled and walked away from the vats, keeping my eye for a way to free the village guards. I couldn't find any. Even if I did, I'd still fail in saving them with Bawu's pets here to stop us. I'd find an opportunity later to break them out and return them to the village. That is...if they're not already dead.
Right now, it wasn't worth ruining this new story path I discovered with my divine brain.
Zombie outbreak? Innocent Mardukryons in danger? Village guards getting experimented on? They could all wait while I showed Bawu how robust my health regeneration was. Herald Stone was genuinely awesome to come up with a poison effectiveness contest. I'm not sure how to call this—a poison face-off? Kill-me-the-best-you-can challenge?
Amusingly enough, I still became a sort of a test subject in the end.
The few poisons I had encountered inflicted Damage over Time with a percentage of either current or maximum health. It was almost destiny that I was using my Totem Juggling build when I met Bawu.
A DPS character might survive a couple of poison statuses.
But if Bawu brought several kinds to test, they'd eventually succumb to the DoT. Kezodilla relied on lifesteal to sustain him during fights. If he were in my place, he'd eventually die due to the Nam-Go poison because he couldn't lifesteal. Bawu and her pets certainly wouldn't appreciate it if he attacked them to survive.
Supports, specifically healers, would be up to the task of surviving poisons. Depending on how strong their heals were, of course. But would it count in Bawu's eyes?
I doubted if she was interested in testing the efficacy of healing spells. Furthermore, Evil Grandma Bawu looked down on Healer Gula and might not take too kindly to healing spells, in a way, 'cheating' her poisons.
A conventional tank build might seem perfect for this challenge.
But no, they'd actually be bad for this.
Tanks typically had vast health pools, a necessity for the job. However, if up against percentage damage, that was a huge liability. Health regeneration could be the answer, but only to a certain point. To be safe, tanks should have high poison resistance to avoid getting poisoned in the first place. Antidotes and skills like [Cleansing Flames] to remove negative status should also be at the ready.
In contrast, I had very low health for my Totem Juggling strategy to work. I needed to pay forty percent of my health to cast both Totems, and I had to spam them out like free meals to the homeless during corporate giving programs.
To accomplish this, I lowered my health by removing all my attribute points in Vigor; my remaining Vigor was from the inherent bonuses of my equipment. Then I stacked as much health regeneration as possible from equipment and food. I didn't even use [Ancestral Constitution] for Totem Juggling. While it did give plenty of health regeneration, it also provided a ton of health which I didn't want. [Ancestral Constitution] increased the regeneration to health ratio when I aimed to lower it.
That reminds me... I checked my inventory to see if I had leftover food from my party's fight against Zoar Elab, the Living Statue. "Bawu probably wouldn't count this as cheating," I said as I ate [Roasted Swineling] and [Craboreling Meat Salad]. Nothing like a good meal before getting poisoned by a mad scientist.
[Roasted Swineling: +75 Armor, +10% Healing Increase for 20 Minutes] ★★☆☆☆
[Craboreling Meat Salad: +18 HP per Second, +3% Physical and Magical Damage Reduction for 20 Minutes] ★★☆☆☆
"I have returned!" Bawu announced even though she was still walking down the tunnel to this laboratory.
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From the strength of her voice to the confident clip-clopping of her hooves on hard rock, I could tell Evil Grandma Bawu was still in control. I hoped this would last for a while. I couldn't predict what her 'good' personality would do. Her 'evil' side was the competitive one, and that was why I managed to drag her into this challenge.
Bawu marched into the room. A [Lvl 23 Mandrake Borple] followed her. The grotesque cross between a mushroom person and a plant monster carried a tray above its head. Several bottles were on it.
"Are you ready to begin, youngling?" Bawu said, unscrewing the cap of the first bottle.
"I was born ready. It's the world that's not ready for me."
Bawu took out a small brass cylinder from inside her robe’s pocket. It had a thin needle jutting out from one end and a horizontal bar that must be its handle on the other. Was it a syringe?
She dipped the needle into the bottle and pulled the handle. Then she approached me with the needle's tip pointed at me.
"I can just drink—Ow!" I exclaimed in surprise as she jabbed the needle into my arm. It didn't hurt, only the usual mild static shock signaling damage. Funnily enough, the injection did take a small chunk off my health bar.
[ Status| Minor Yu'vi Poisoning: Lose 1% of Max Health every second, Reduce Maximum Health by 10% for 5 minutes ]
"Lesser DoT than the Nam-Go poison," I said, examining the effect, "but, Divine Bovine, reducing my maximum health is...actually helpful right now." In other situations, not so much. It'd be a massive blow to a tank if ten percent of their health were removed just like that.
I should check later if a penalty like this could be countered by, for example, ten percent more health. That would be the best case if the two canceled each other out. If there were an order of operations or something along those lines, the poisoned target would likely be on the losing end.
"No effect, my test subject? I meant my youngling assistant." Bawu was opening the next bottle.
"It does have an effect, but it doesn't bother me at all."
"Then perhaps the venom extracted from the stinger of the Fulgurian Hornet can deliver excruciating pain."
"Excruciating pain? What were we testing again? I don't think it's that," I said as Bawu held the syringe above me. "And let me just drink—" She jabbed the needle deep into my flesh once again. "Hey! Calm down with the stabbing."
[ Status| Fulgurian Hornet Poisoning: Lose 2.6% of Max Health every 2 seconds, Reduce Lightning Resistance by 23% for 8 minutes ]
That reduction looked nasty. Given that I had no Lightning Resistance, my stats showed a negative value. I wouldn't want to get hit by the lightning attack the Carrion Golem could do after being buffed by Bawu.
"Still nothing happening," I said. "Maybe you have mixed the poison with fruit juice for younglings?"
"Then how about this!"
What followed reminded me of fashion montages in reality TV shows my sister Nelly loved. There would be upbeat music as the contestants tried the latest fashion trends to see what style would work best for them.
Instead of clothes, I was trying different kinds of poisons. And instead of finding my style, Bawu tested what poison affected me. There was also no upbeat music, only clanking and whirring from the machines, the growling of Ladambor, and the clicking of Melasbo.
"How many is this already? One, two, three..." I said as I counted the negative statuses I pulled up in front of me.
"And another one!"
[ Status| Pyrexia Affliction: Lose 3.5% of Max Health every second, Reduce Fire and Burning Resistance by 20%, Increase Fire Damage Received by 15% for 5 minutes ]
"That's nine in total, including the Nam-Go poison earlier, which is about to expire," I said.
My health bar flickered like a broken headlight. It went down about thirty percent every second and immediately regenerated back to full the next. I'd be dead in a few seconds if I weren't using my admittedly gimmicky Totem Juggling build. Suppose the poison's DoT was calculated differently like if it were a percentage of the user's Attack Power, I'd also be dead.
Whether healers or tanks, I doubted conventional builds could survive this much DoT—poison was truly a tank killer. Since I was already here, I should also try to learn how to counter or lessen its effects from Bawu. Mithridatism, I think that's the term, was the practice of ingesting non-lethal doses of poison to build immunity to it over time.
Unfortunately, Bawu wasn't microdosing me at all to make me immune. She’s just looking for a way to kill me.
Only one bottle was left on the tray carried by the Mandrake Borple. It was a round bottom bottle with a long neck wrapped with thin, frayed ropes. Strips of parchment with small runic scribbles in red ink, probably blood, hang from the strings.
"That looks like the packaging of the hottest hot sauce in the world," I said as Bawu picked it up.
"Your body is a marvel, youngling! But I refuse to believe that you won't die to poisons."
"It sounds like you want to kill me now instead of just testing."
"As for the last poison...the venom of the Warm-Bloodied Basilisk!"