Goddess Collector: Every Hole is a Goal

Chapter 144: The Bizarre Demon Slayers


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A big shoutout to BBWulf and Yougie for contributing and supporting me as an entertainer!

Hey guys, its FanHarem here and let me ask you one thing. Do you feel the need to destroy the light and curb your hidden, ruthlessly, sadistic needs that have been growing slowly, then look no more, because I present—

The Clown Prince of Akatsuki.

It's my first time writing first POV and as the novel states, naruto is the Clown Prince of Chaos.

***

To say that Nik wasn't surprised would be a lie. From— Art is an explosion— to an actual explosion, Nik did not have much time to think. After all, the most famous quote ever uttered in the Legends of Naruto was— Sasuke, I am your friend— followed by,— Eh? Hinata liked me?—

Only then did come the quote— Art is an Explosion. But this was neither the time or the place to enter into a long debate on who said what and how famous it was. They both had bigger fish to fry. For someone who proclaimed to have a lot of experience, Brian's current actions, in Nik's eyes, were brash and infuriating.

They knew nothing about the so-called demon, the realisation hit him when a burnt body fell right between the space that separated the fiendish duo and a low, but very audible growl erupted from what Nik had ascertained to be a corpse.

And now, Nik was forced to admit the fact that behind all that false bravado of knowing everything, Brian was just like him, a simpleton. And while Nik cherished simpletons, whether male or female, as evidenced by the existence of Rick and Gunta in his life, Nik still couldn't help but curse the Temporal Fiend who must have been kicked in the head for hours!

He immediately raised his hands, just like the surprised Brian, to protect his eyes from the burning splinters.

Nik truly wished that he hadn't accidentally noticed Brian's shocked expression.

'What the hell are you being surprised for, dumbass?!! You blow up a wooden hut, you get the splinters!

Fuck this hurts!!!'

Nik clenched his jaws to keep his pained groans within while the corpse just beside the duo kept groaning.

With their firearms filled with tiny wooden spikes, Nik and Brian both looked at each other. Apologies were conveyed and accepted in a single glance as the duo looked towards the annoying 'corpse' with malevolent gazes. Nik's violet eyes practically glowed while Brian's azure eyes were equally domineering.

"Let's experiment then." Brian whispered as his gaze flashed for a moment before determining the location of the supposed demon slayers and continued.

"We won't kill him, but make him speak the method of killing the demons before the slayers arrive."

Nik frowned and shook his head. Although the body was burnt quite badly, Nik finally ascertained why he had a strange feeling in his heart.

"This one is a girl..."

Nik whispered while Brian shrugged.

"Burnt corpses do not have any genders."

"But how do we make it talk?"

Nik questioned. After all, he wasn't an expert in this kind of thing. Meanwhile, he had already used Gravity Bending to pull out the splinters while his forearms immediately crackled with purity Lightning that went along with his enhanced Vitality.

In short, his minor bleeding had already stopped. Meaning, Brian didn't even have any need for the process Nik went through. With his Vitality higher than Nik's the bleeding stopped almost instantly.

"Making it talk, huh..."

Brian frowned as he met the gaze of the beast that seethed with rage and anguish while trying to claw its way towards him, making him sigh.

"Look, I am quite a gentle one if the other party is reasonable. So tell me, can you talk?"

Brian questioned candidly while Nik's astonished gaze rested on Brian.

"Are you serious?"

Nik seriously questioned him while the Blue-haired Temporal Fiend nodded and looked back at the clawing demon. Wait... its claws had already returned. Although the demon did not show any limb generation at the moment, Nik could already see the hair growing back from the burnt-out scalp.

"Its hair is growing back... ah, its nails are also back." Brian commented with a hint of curiosity while Nik was already frowning. This level of regeneration had already surpassed what Nik was capable of as he sighed and tapped on Brian's shoulder.

"I suggest that we leave this one to the two approaching ones... let's see how they deal with it."

Brian thought for a while before exhaling and nodding but immediately, their senses tingled and the duo jumped when two lumps of flesh flew past them.

The moment the duo landed, they reorganised themselves, carelessness completely disappointed from their eyes that was turned into shock and awe as two legs... two separate legs actually had miniature legs formed out from the base of the torn region, allowed the legs to move... on legs.

It was strange, Nik was forced to admit once again as he would have never imagined the two separate legs growing a pair of limbs. The main body regenerating limbs was understandable. But the torn limbs forming more limbs... it was simply monstrous. Unlike the gloom present on Nik's face, Brian was clearly excited.

"We may finally get some leads on our evolution. So let's not wait around and let this bastard continue.

I'll deal with the legs and you crush the head, fair enough?"

Brian spoke as his hands were already covered in spiked gauntlets while Nik equipped his [Earth Slasher (W-8)] as he gave Brian a dirty look before sighing.

"I'll deal with the legs and you bash the head... you got the bracers, man."

Nik sighed and for the first time, felt that he might no be giving his own wisdom enough credit. Brandishing a clear blade with only a plain grey hilt that seemed to be perfectly symmetrical with the sword, Nik shot towards the unruly leg while Brian thought for a moment before walking towards the corpse.

With a cold gaze, Brian simply smashed the rapidly trembling head into a gory pulp while spitting in disgust.

"Your legs can freaking move on regenerated limbs but you cannot give a proper reasonable response? 

The hell is wrong with you?"

Brian's eyes flashed dangerously when he felt slight movements in the body of the corpse as he bashed his fist on the chest area this time. His black-red spiked bracers fashioned a demonic glow as the blood on its surface seemed to seep within the spikes.

Meanwhile, Nik had just slashed the disobedient limb into two halves before he proceeded to divert his attention towards the second limb. Although his own swordsmanship was sub-par at best, he made up for the quality of his technique with his strong physique as soon, the second dastardly limb was cut off, too.

'The regeneration effect seemed to be limited. But these are just limbs... what about the main body?'

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While Nik could hear the ferocious thrash right beside him, he wasn't going to divert his attention before the enemy in front of him had been taken care of. But now, his face visibly paled as he looked at the current state Brian was in.

Usually, the short, blue-haired youth would look refined and elegant. His words spoken with a purpose behind them, but of course, Nik also realised that the elegance was simply a front that hid an adorable simpleton. But Nik never would have thought that even the clueless face was a front to hide this... monstrosity.

Azure eyes had long turned into the small lake of crimson blood as Brian's spiked gloves thrashed every inch of the demon's body. Flesh exploded into a gory mess as squirts of blood would follow soon after, covering Brian's body, his gaze continued flashing for a moment until Nik didn't feel any source of life from the demon and surprisingly, Brian also found his calm after the sudden disappearance of the life force.

"Huff~ And here I thought we had found an intelligent life form. This one was just a random pleb."

Brian muttered as he stood up and looked at the shocked Nik, making him chuckle.

"Oi, oi, Incubus, did you forget that I am a fiend? My speciality is battle, and as much as I would hate to admit, your speciality is sex.

We are both monsters when it came to our speciality."

Brian's words did bring Nik out of his reverie before he frowned.

"What... so that's it? We bash them, or cut them, until they are no longer able to regenerate?"

Nik pondered out loud while Brian surprisingly refuted.

"I don't think so... in my eyes, the regeneration seems to 'spread'... so with every major wound, they would need massive amounts of energy to regenerate. If they are unable to tap into any source of energy..."

"They die..." Nik nodded in understanding while he looked at the blazing house.

"And humans... or at least, living beings are their food?" Nik inquired, after all, the evidence really pointed in that front while Brian nodded candidly.

"Usually, it is always like that. Monsters lusting after human flesh."

Brian concluded when they both simultaneously turned towards the entrance of the raised pavilion, matching gaze with two terrified youths, one blonde and one brunette.

"*Gulp* Oi, Ceasar... aren't they both two bizarre to he demon hunters?"

Jojo inquired as he looked at Brian with no small amount of fear as Ceasar frowned and shook his head.

"They aren't demon hunters... or else, the demon wouldn't be in such a mess. But they are also not demons themselves...

That life signature is definitely human... but too strong to be a human.

What is going on?"

Ceasar exhaled loudly before stating loudly.

"Excuse me, we are not here... with evil intentions.

We are part of the demon slayer corps."

Ceasar spoke while stepping forward, making Jojo flinch as he sighed and continued Ceasar's pace.

"Demon Slayers? What the hell is that?"

For the sake of acting, Nik immediately took a defensive posture while understanding flashed within Brain's eyes as he, too, took a defensive stature.

Seeing this, Ceasar's body twitched and he immediately came to a stop and raised both of his hands while stating loudly once again.

"Please, guys, don't be afraid. We are not here to hurt you. We also wanted to hunt that demon. And I would also like to point out that the demon isn't completely dead. Although it might not regenerate before the sun rises, we shouldn't take any risks."

Hearing this, Brian visibly scowled as he still couldn't feel a shred of life-force within the demon. And fiends, in particular, prided themselves over their senses. 

"Alright, you can proceed... but one wrong move and..."

Nik hissed as Ceasar and Jojo nodded before making slow steps towards the gory scene, astonishingly, unperturbed by the carnage as Ceasar's body glowed brilliantly, a golden tendril of energy leaking outside of his body before the carnage crumbled into nothing but dust.

Meanwhile, Jojo walked towards the slashed legs and committed the same action, much to the duo's surprise, the life energy reading around the two of them was off the charts.

Brian and Nik looked at each other before nodding. Since Nik still hadn't stored his blade, he kept it on his hand while waiting for Ceasar's explanation.

"My name is Ceasar... the successor of the Bubble Pillar!"

The blonde turned towards the duo and nodded while the brunette immediately shouted in refusal.

"What successor of bubble pillar? You damned bastard! There is no bubble pillar!"

Before Ceasar could refute, the brunette looked at Nik and Brian while grinning.

"I am Joseph Joestar, by the way, you can call me Jojo. And before we talk, why don't we put aside the blade?"

He pointed at Nik's Earth Slasher.

"The sheathe was destroyed."

Nik replied plainly as Ceasar frowned.

"What kind of person fights with the sheath?"

"What kind of person becomes a sun at night. To us, you are equally demon-like!"

Brian snarled, making the duo visibly flinch as Ceasar nodded in understanding.

"I am sorry, let's go back and discuss things within the village.

Many villagers are already making their way in here."

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