Golden Solitude: A Tale Of War & Love

Chapter 16: Chapter 6: Scared.


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The rain was heavy today, it’s been almost two days since Vira asked Stella about her. But everytime she tries to answer, she stutters and starts panicking. So we told her that she can take her time.

It’s the morning but the sky was a dark blue and it was raining. Stella was sleeping on the bed as well, but she didn’t wake up. Usually I would rather have the normal morning weather, but this rain is nice too. The droplets pitter-pattered on the bare soil and made the nostalgic smell of the rain. Just the sound of the rain resonated in the room, and it was peaceful, as though there was nothing else in this world except for me and this rain. 

Taking a deep breath I thought maybe I should see what I can do, since I can’t go to dad’s office right now. Since it’s raining heavily after all. 

Aha! Good thing I bought the magic book with me. I thought I could read it at home as well if we were free, and it turns out it’s my lucky day.

As I continued reading the book trying to understand the complex topics that hadn’t yet been translated into the tiny guide book that Hak gave me. Many of the chapters were completely out of range for me, I couldn’t understand a single word of them. While others were relatively straight forward. 

The parts I had most difficulty with were when we’d have to visualize a function within, we can basically have nested functions, but unlike code where the instructions go from beginning to end, magic functions can be used at different times, we can also parallel process within one function meaning it gets really complicated really quickly. And even Hak couldn’t explain it well to me, I just had to use my intuitive understanding to make sense of it.

And then suddenly the sage started groaning, “Aghh~ I haven’t been able to practise meditation at all...  this is absolutely infuriating.”

I then replied, “Like I said, it’s raining right now, and we can’t really do that.”

He then said, “Well that’s for today, what about all the days I missed because either of you wanted to do something...”

Well to be honest, I have been stealing a bit of his time to do my studying. And Vira’s been taking some of his time away to help Stella. So, the sage isn’t necessarily wrong.. But still... We needed that time...

[Haah~ Fine. I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t respect the time you needed...]

[Finally! But it’s fine either way, I’ll just use up some of your time for a week, hahaha!]

I don’t exactly have much of a choice here, do I? 

[Fine... You can do that...]

[Huh?! No fair! He gets extra!] It was Vira who shouted that.

[Shut up brat! Weren’t you the one who took some of my time away!]

He showed his tongue, and said [Bweeh~! All you do is run around anyway!]

[Come here, you little!]

The both of them continued to fight for it, but eventually we agreed that we wouldn’t overstep our times unless it was absolutely important to do so, but in the end the sage didn’t get the extra time. And I would be lying if I said I didn’t want that.

Aside from that, the day went normally except it’s been a bit awkward with Stella. She doesn’t eat saying that she’s fine and she seems kind of dull today.


 

Soon it was night, and though we had dinner, Stella barely ate anything. I don’t know what to do. I want to help her, but I don’t know her well enough to help her.

And not to mention I don’t know where she even came from. And how did she even get to the tree, unless she came from the west, in which case that’d mean she’d have to travel atop the mountains. 

I was simply sitting on the bed cross-legged watching out from the windows, the rain stopped but now there were water puddles and mud everywhere. And Stella was behind me, sleeping of course. Or at least I thought so...

Her eyes were open, but she didn’t pay attention to anything, even to the fact that I was looking at her.

“...Stella..?”

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She looked at me, and then immediately sat up, as though I woke her up.

“What happened..?”

“..I’m sorry..”

“Why..?” I didn’t understand why she was apologizing.

“..i think.. I can tell you now...”

She was shivering and was blabbering out words. I sat in front of her, and held her hands. “It’s okay. Just take a deep breath and tell me.”

“...okay...” She took a deep breath and told me, “...when I was coming back from reading books... I heard screaming.. And then..” 

She started tearing up, her voice quieted down. I held her hands tighter and said, “Don’t force yourself to do this...”

She continued, “it.. was red everywhere.. on the floor.. on the table... it was everywhere! I didn’t know what was happening! Dad was covered in blood- mom was on the floor, I don’t- know!” 

She started looking pale, and started taking short breaths.

I hugged her tightly trying to calm her down, I said “Stop already! Don’t force yourself!” 

“And the- Car- came he told me- to-” She wasn’t even able to say the words because she had to take breaths, why isn’t she stopping!

“I told you, stop!” I shouted, but she still tried.

Agh!! Why is she trying so hard to tell me this?! 

It was then that I remembered.

Was it because we told her that we’d let her stay if she gave a good enough reason?!’ Aghh! This stupid girl!

“I’ll make sure to let you stay, so stop it!” She was still panicking but she stopped trying to speak.

“Calm down! I won’t send you out anywhere!” 

After a few minutes she finally calmed down and hugged me back. 

“It.. was so scary.. Vira... I ran away... I don’t... please let me..” She started crying, but she still tried to hold it in. I told her, “It’s okay.. Just let it all out... And it’s fine already... We’ll let you stay...”

She didn’t let go of me. She cried into my shoulders.

I patted her on the back, and said “It’s fine already... Don’t worry about it...” 

I didn’t know what to do anymore. From what she said it didn’t seem like we could send her back to her home. Not to mention I already told her we’d let her stay here. It’s not like we can’t just send her to the orphanage, but that doesn’t make me feel good. And it’d feel like I’m abandoning this girl... How the hell am I supposed to convince my parents with this situation? 

I’ve really done it myself on this one. Even though I was the one who told Vira not to make promises we can’t keep... Haah~ This is going to be.. Difficult.

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