Chapter 148: GNU Ch 59 Part 1 – Pressure (I)

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Zhai Yanlin was angry. He knew that he was not in the position to feel angry, but thinking of the possibility, he couldn’t help being irritated.

Seeing Zhai Yanlin’s complexion turned gloomy, one of his men was about to speak, but Zhai Yanlin stopped them. There was anger in his eyes, and he mentioned his people to not come forward or make trouble.

Meanwhile, Cheng Yujin’s eyes widened in amazement. She was beyond surprise. Last time, she thought that Xu Zhixian was merely talking lightly.

Cheng Yujin was baffled. Up until just a moment ago, she always thought that Xu Zhixian liked Cheng Yumo. However, at Cheng Yumo’s wedding, Xu Zhixian didn’t show anything unusual, and even enthusiastically followed into the fun. Seeing this, Cheng Yujin knew that she probably had made a wrong guess. It seemed that Xu Zhixian really treated Cheng Yumo as a dear cousin sister instead of a love interest.

It might be that Cheng Yujin’s misread the feeling Xu Zhixian had towards Cheng Yumo, but knowing that he really wanted to marry her was a totally different matter. A man might sympathize because of his mother’s request, but after getting rejected once, he would never propose to that woman again. Although Cheng Yujin was inexperienced in the matter of romance, she still understood these basic principles.

Therefore, Xu Zhixian was not joking, nor was he talking thoughtlessly. He seriously wanted to marry her.

But why? Cheng Yujin always felt that she was not good at flattering men. Her prim and properness were well-received among female elders. But in men’s eyes, she was rigid and boring. Cheng Yujin knew that compared to Cheng Yumo, she was unable to get along with young people of her age. She was not as close as Cheng Yumo, and it wasn’t easy to find a common topic to chat with her peers. On the contrary, she was very good at taking care of them as an elder sister.

Changing the position, if Cheng Yujin were a man, she definitely wouldn’t like her own character, let alone others. However, it didn’t matter, because the right to speak in the marriage was in the mother-in-law’s hand. Even if she got married, the people with who she had to deal most of the time were the female in-laws. Therefore, after weighing the two sides, Cheng Yujin ultimately gave up pleasing the men and focused her efforts on the female circle. She knew what kind of daughter-in-law these noble madams wanted, and her goal over so many years was to transform herself into such a perfect model.

But at this moment, Cheng Yujin began to doubt her own vision. She had mistaken the feelings between Cheng Yumo and Xu Zhixian, and even failed to notice Xu Zhixian’s affection. How could this be?

Cheng Yujin was silent for a long time before she finally muttered: “Second biao brother, what do you mean by this?”

“Exactly what I just said.” Xu Zhixian was a little nervous. His eyes focused on Cheng Yujin. “When mother asked to let me marry you before, I was so surprised that I couldn’t think properly. It happened that you came at unfortunate timing and didn’t hear what followed, resulting in misunderstanding. In fact, I am very happy to marry you. When I think that I will spend the rest of my life with elder sister Jin, I’m very much looking forward to it. Elder sister Jin doesn’t like to play around and has been busy with studying over these years. But I know a lot of fun. Later, we can do it together.”

For the past two months, Xu Zhixian kept thinking about this, almost to the point of obsession. Whenever he was free, Cheng Yujin’s figure would appear in his mind, repeating the words she said that day. Xu Zhixian was secretly worried. In the end, he finally made up his mind to speak clearly with Cheng Yujin in person on the day of Cheng Yumo’s wedding.

It took the young man a lot of courage to say all of this. After he finally finished, he suddenly breathed a sigh of relief. His black eyes looked at Cheng Yujin expectantly.

Cheng Yujin became even more bewildered. She almost doubted her perception over the years. She never felt that Xu Zhixian liked her, or even thought about the possibility at all. Could it be that many of her other perceptions were also wrong?

However, even if Cheng Yujin’s beliefs were collapsing, her logic still won over emotion. Cheng Yujin quickly returned to herself. Whether Xu Zhixian liked her or whether she felt pleased by this was not important. She wouldn’t marry this man. So why should the ins and outs of this thing matter to her?

It truly didn’t matter. There was no need to linger over something that was bound to bear no result. Cheng Yujin calmed down in an instant. She smiled and said: “Second biao brother, I’m thankful for your good intention. But this matter is related to my reputation as a woman. My engagement has been canceled once, and I cannot afford to experience it again.”

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“Elder sister Jin?”

“Second cousin, you are sincerely good to me, and I am very grateful. But we are impossible. You and aunt are my relatives and willing to accommodate me, but the Old Madam of Chang Duke manor won’t. I cannot put you and aunt at a disadvantage for my own sake. Anyway, I still have to observe the mourning for grandfather. For one year, I don’t have to worry about those displeasing things. One year later, if it is my fate to get married, I will naturally find a match. If not, I can still live without lacking anything in the Cheng family for the rest of my life. I know that second biao brother is doing your best for my sake, and I am very grateful for your kindness. But no matter what, it is impossible for us.”

Cheng Yujin paused, then she added in a calm, rational, and almost cold voice: “Second biao brother, you should forget what aunt said that day.”

Forget? How can he forget? Xu Zhixian was anxious and subconsciously stepped forward: “Younger sister, I am not pitying. I am serious.”

“I know.” Cheng Yujin gestured to Lian Qiao and stopped Xu Zhixian calmly. She looked at the young man for a while and finally said ruthlessly: “For a woman, reputation is extremely important. If biao brother doesn’t want to force me to death, please stop saying this kind of thing anymore.”

Xu Zhixian’s footsteps staggered. The radiance inside his pupils suddenly shattered and vanished like a falling mirror.

Seeing Xu Zhixian finally calmed down. Cheng Yujin curtsied a bit and smiled politely: “Second biao brother, we will still be cousins in the future, won’t we?”

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“…Yes.”

“That’s great. Second biao brother, look at how lively second sister’s wedding is today. When second biao brother marries your wife later, you shouldn’t forget to invite me. Let me see how the wedding ceremony at the groom’s side looks like, okay?”

Xu Zhixian understood the meaning behind Cheng Yujin’s words. He couldn’t tell whether he felt bitter or painful. He wanted to smile at Cheng Yujin, but the expression he managed to make was uglier than crying: “Okay.”

“Thank you, biao brother.” Cheng Yujin curtsied at Xu Zhixian for the last time, then took her leave. The roofed corridors were lit up with lanterns on every side, very lively. When Cheng Yujin stood in her white dress, she looked out of sync with her surrounding, like a figure of an ethereal lady that could vanish any time. She only brought a servant girl. Her back figure was thin and lonely, but she walked forward without hesitation and soon disappeared from the sight.

Xu Zhixian stared blankly, as if being charmed. This was his elder sister Jin, who was always firm and steady, and never needed pity from others.

Including himself.

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