Chapter 70: 71

Why did Ford come to look for Evan? It didn’t bother Evan for a long time. Early the next morning, Ford came to the church again and this time Evan was not even able to change into the priest’s robe, he could only stare at the slightly gasping Ford in amazement.

And Ford was not feeling well at this time. He didn’t dare to look directly into Evan’s eyes.

Evan felt a little surprised. He had fought with Ford several times but he had never seen Ford like this.

“Do you have anything to do with me, Mr Ford?” Evan opened the topic first.

Ford pursed his lips, looking a little embarrassed as he spoke, “I…I heard.”

“What have you heard?” Evan’s heart moved slightly, but he looked at Ford with a look of doubt on the surface, “I’m listening. What did you hear?”

Ford coughed a few times, looking more embarrassed than before, “It’s…it’s my father’s business.” He was a little vague, as he looked more and more embarrassed.

Evan only made a look of sudden realization at this time, and then his expression became embarrassed.

“That thing, I really…” Although Evan also imagined what the situation would be like after Ford finds out about it, he still didn’t know what to say at this time.

“Please don’t say any more.” Ford suddenly interrupted Evan’s speech, with a look of shame on his face, “I didn’t know about my father’s search for you about the matter between the two of us. It’s because of this that it became what it is now. it’s just that I want to ask you whether those rumors were spread by you at that time.”

At that time, Evan resolutely refused to attack Ford and although he did not say it himself, his hatred for Evan was actually very deep. The reason why he hates Evan is that on the one hand, he has the hatred that his life has been destroyed, but he also has the unwillingness that his pure feelings had suffered a huge blow. Now he suddenly knows that it is his father, with his one-handed planning that caused his original deep love to turn into hatred. He was at a loss for a while, but at this time, he could only grasp this point about the rumors and let himself make the last struggle.

Evan looked at Ford and felt relieved, he sighed, “Mr Ford, please tell me first, how did you know about this?”

When Ford heard him ask this, a trace of pain flashed in his expression. He clenched his fists tightly and said in a low voice, “Do you think that as long as you don’t tell me, I won’t know? Do you think you will be like a saint, by hiding everything like this? Uh, Bruce? You shouldn’t lie about this matter, and you don’t need to ask me how I found out about it, you just need to tell me the truth about what happened that year!”

Ford suffered a huge blow from the Duke before, and it was as if he was rehabilitated. But he didn’t expect that on the way to find evidence, he found the secretary of his father from back then. They talked about Evan when they were chatting, and then all the past events came out to him like a tide. It is almost unimaginable how his father, known for his ruthlessness and strictness, dealt with Evan, who was a child.

Evan looked at the agitated Ford and he felt a little helpless, but his tone was gentle, “Mr Ford, the reason why I kept silent on this matter is just to respect the deceased, your father made me make a promise never to speak. I don’t want to break this promise, but now that you know all about it, I will tell you frankly and honestly that when your reputation was damaged back then, although I didn’t do it, I blamed myself for the matter. It was I who made the wrong friends, which caused you to suffer such harm. If you want to hate me, you can hate me, it’s all my fault.”

As Evan spoke, every word made Ford’s fists clench even tighter, until in the end, he looked at Evan with red eyes and almost roared in a low voice, “Is that all you want to say about this matter?”

Evan lowered his eyes, with a hint of pity in his expression, “Your pain has made me uneasy for most of my life, that’s why I devoted myself to religion. I hope the Lord can resolve the remorse in my heart, but after so many years, I still feel sorry for you. I’m very sorry, Mr Ford. I’m really, really sorry. I don’t know how to resolve my sins and I don’t know how to make amends to you. I don’t even have the face to ask for your forgiveness. This incident has made me miserable for the rest of my life, and I can’t face it.”

Evan said these words with true feelings, the sadness and pain in his tone could almost make the gods cry, but Ford’s expression became more and more bad.

“Is this what you want to say?” The same question as before, but this sentence is more like it is being squeezed out of the jaws with a ferocity.

Evan raised his head to look at Ford with some doubt . Ford’s eyes were red, and there was a hint of madness and unwillingness in his eyes.

“Mr Ford?” Evan felt that something was wrong.

“I ask you, do you really have nothing else to say?” Ford stared at Evan, as if he wanted to see something in him.
(Is he supposed to say that he loves you or something? )

Evan felt more and more strange. What this Ford wants to do seemed to be a little different from what he expected.

“I…I have nothing to say…” Evan’s tone sounded uneasy.

Ford looked at Evan, looked at his calm eyes, looked at his puzzled expression, and the breath that was originally held in his chest suddenly fell. He really didn’t know what he was expecting.

Ford closed his eyes in despair. For so many years, he seemed to have developed an obsession with this person. He’d always appeared in the deepest part of his dreams and became his lifelong nightmare. From the beginning, his love changed. For the last hatred, this feeling of devoting all of his body and mind seems to have become an emotion that he can’t get rid of in his life, and has even become a part of him.

But suddenly, one day, a person suddenly appeared and told him that the love and hatred from all those days was just a script tailored by others for him, and even the reason for his deepest hatred was not with him. It doesn’t matter, although he took this matter to himself, he is not an unreasonable person. The old secretary of his father told him the reason his father investigated back then, which was exactly the same as what Evan said. It’s not his fault, but his own credulity.

Ford loosened his clenched fists and let out a long breath. When he looked at Evan, his expression had recovered.

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“I’m sorry for what I’ve done these days.” Ford looked at Evan with a cold face, all his emotions were hidden in his deep eyes. Let this matter end completely, all the love and hate, those pains and struggles, let them all end!

Evan breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that Ford had regained his composure. This person’s mood is really uncertain.

“You don’t have to be sorry.” Evan’s expression was still gentle, “This is all my fault and I will spend my whole life repenting.”

Ford nodded indifferently and without saying more, turned around and left. But when he walked to the door, he stopped suddenly, turned back to Evan and said, “I’ll leave Delanlier tomorrow and I won’t disturb you again.”

Without waiting for Evan’s response, he left the church quickly.

Looking at Ford’s back, Evan was speechless for a while, this Ford is really difficult to understand.

************

Ford crossed the forest paths in the countryside, looking at the rising sun in the distance, he felt a little empty in his heart for some reason. Since he found out the truth yesterday, he had been eager to see Evan. He didn’t know what he was looking forward to, but it is definitely not a polite and cold conversation like today.

It was also at this time that he suddenly discovered that he was the only one who could never get out of the love and hatred of that year, and he was the only one who still stubbornly remembered the love and hatred of that year. He remembers how they looked when they first met, remembers the way Evan looked when he called his name, remembers the exaggerated expression on his face when he confessed to him, remembers the pain in his heart when Evan left, those ignorant times when he was young, like an oil painting, that made his once boring and dry life so fresh.

He was not a likable character at that time, but there was such a person who always followed him and maybe because of habit or maybe because of loneliness, he let that person into his life for the first time. But the result of it was so tragic, so tragic that he’s trembling all over when he thinks about it now. But after so many years, he reminisced about that period of life over and over again, holding those love, hatred and sadness tightly in the palm of his hand.

What he likes, what he hates, what he suffers, what happiness is, all belong to him. His love, his past, his life.

Ford stopped, raised his head and looked at the clouds in the sky, squinting his eyes. Such strong emotions had almost emptied his whole being, and now there is only a feeling of endless emptiness left. Maybe he will find someone in the future. A girl who is not very beautiful but very gentle, it will also be good to have children with her and live an ordinary life.

The dazzling sunlight made Ford squint. It seemed that a cold liquid slipped from his eyes. Is it raining? Ford thought. It was really strange, how could it rain suddenly? Ford wiped off the liquid from the corner of his eyes as if nothing had happened and walked quickly in a direction.

Everyone has to move forward, he can’t go back.

**********

While Evan’s mood at this time is relaxed and comfortable. Ford is an untimely bomb to him and at this time, this bomb is finally removed from his life. He finally doesn’t have to worry, and finally doesn’t have to be upset.

Evan stood in front of the altar, looking at the crucifix aloft, his expression was compassionate and gentle, as if it was not him but the world who suffered. Suddenly some memories suddenly appeared in his mind, all related to Ford.

When he was young, Ford was gloomy and mean and his handsome face always had a mocking smile on his face, but it was such a Ford, who was so tall and reliable in his memory. When he laughed, the corners of his lips would turn up and his teeth would be exposed. When he frowns, the ends of his brows droop slightly. When he is angry, his fingertips tremble slightly. When he called his name, the end would sound lingering and soft.

Different from the dry and vague memory from before, the memory at this time was like a real and clear dream. He looked at he and Ford when they were young through Evan’s eyes.

Evan’s head seemed to burst with a headache, he knelt on the ground and his hands were tightly grasping the railing.

Suddenly, a drop of cold liquid fell on the back of his hand.

Surprised, Evan looked at the drop of water on the back of his hand.

It was a tear.

Tears that belong to ‘Evan’.

 

 

T/N – Yay, Ford is finally gone. Although I kinda do feel sorry for him, he was played in a way too.

Sorry guys, this chapter might not be well translated. I’m not feeling well, feeling disoriented so I was really distracted as I typed. I apologise.

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