Chapter 32: Chapter 32: Waking Up

I felt the warmth of the evening sun against my fur. My eyelids parted open, and I saw a collapsing room lit in a nostalgic orange. Shards of glass reflected the light, splinters of wood scattered dust, motes that glittered in the air.

My head swiveled slightly to the side, and I saw a familiar woman sprawled against the wall.

It was Flaze.

Her gaze was looking towards a distance unseen, staring at the shattered windows letting in the cold air of our elevation.

She had changed into new clothes, presumably while I'd been sleeping. A black skirt, and a blue T-Shirt tinged in red by the arms.

I noticed then, that she was injured. Her arm bent the wrong way, entirely discolored as if the entire limb was one big bruise, blood leaking from dozens of wounds.

Her face was so peaceful, that it was hard to tell she was in pain. But I knew she had to be suffering, so I quickly gathered up all my strength and stood up.

Or at least, I tried to.

I lifted myself all of one inch off the ground, before my strength faltered, and I fell back to the floor, nearly answering the call of slumber. I chewed on my tongue with my horse teeth to keep myself awake.

A neigh escaped my mouth. Of frustration, of desperation.

Flaze heard my whine, and her head turned towards my direction.

Our eyes met.

"Ah." She said, and pointed at me. She got up, and I didn't miss the grimace on her face, from merely moving her body.

I tried again, to move, but she held her hand up and said, "It's okay. I'll come to you. You probably shouldn't be moving yet."

I relaxed, and allowed her to do as she said.

She crouched right before me, our eyes met from up close. "Are you okay, Jackal? Does it hurt anywhere?"

It hurts everywhere. I neighed.

She chuckled. "Well, you should go rest. There's no rush." Her voice turned more strict. "Okay, Jackal?"

I gulped.

O-okay... I neighed. But first...

[Blessed Heal].

I used my Skill on her, and it definitely took hold. But it felt like I was riding a bike for the first first time in years, a certain rustiness to my ability.

I took a deep breath, and then cast the Skill again, this time targeting myself as well.

It worked, I visualized both the human and horse anatomy. I used the same spell in succession, until I felt like normal, the seeping lethargy banished away. Flaze too had her arm reconstructed good as new.

That feels so much better. I neighed, and shook my head. The mane atop fluttered against the wind.

Flaze was still crouched low, and I, still sprawled to the ground, taking her advice to get some rest.

Flaze looked deeply at her own hands, observing and stretching her fingers in great detail. She put a palm to her chest, and felt her heaving breaths. She released a satisfied sigh, before she bolted right back up. "Thanks Jackal! It's been hard this past day without you!"

She made a face, that made me think she had a lot more to say, but instead she stepped away and rummaged around a red and black bag she must have gotten from somewhere.

She showed me a book, its cover that of a spider battling a dragon.

It's the Light Novel she'd picked out for me earlier.

Flaze sat back down beside me and asked, "Do you want me flip the pages for you, or read it out loud."

Well, I do need to relax. That last fight was... terrible.

I neighed and closed my eyes, the ears above my head perked up. Read.

Flaze smiled and patted my back. "Okay."

~~~

I listened to the tale of a grand spider, stuck in a labyrinth, forced to fight for her life. Flaze really got into the narration, and I felt happy to see her so immersed in it, even acting out some of the parts herself.

She took a break in the middle to get some water. I tried to stand back up while she was gone, finding my feet still wobbly, but workable.

Flaze saw me when she got back, and she swiftly rushed to my side, helping me up. "Are you okay, Jackal?"

Yeah. I neighed.

"Are you sure? You're well rested enough? It doesn't hurt anywhere?"

I'm sure. I'm fine. I steadied myself, and galloped a little. A few steps, and I was accustomed again to walking properly.

I really am fine.

I don't know to whom those sentiments were addressed.

Flaze released a breath, one that I didn't know she'd been holding all this time. It was a sigh of utter and absolute relief.

"I'm so glad. I'm so glad you're okay Jackal..." She laughed. I was left surprised when she also cried, burying her head in my chest. Flaze sniffed loudly, and I felt the snot flowing down my fur. It made my hairs stand on end, I wanted to push her off, but I made the choice not to. I deserve this.

I nuzzled against her, the tears of my friend getting to myself as I also cried. For what, I wasn't entirely sure. There was so much worth shedding tears for.

From Darkvoid's death, to the way I lashed out. The worry over my other friends' well-being, and even that final performance we will now truly never be able to give. Because one of the key actors had well and truly left the stage.

Flaze lifted her head up again after a while, her face a disheveled mess, and not just because she'd been ugly crying into my fur moments prior.

I saw clearly, through the dirt and grime; Her beaming expression, a true and genuine smile at my well-being.

It warmed my heart. It's hard to remember what I still have, when I've lost something just as big.

I returned the gesture, a beaming smile that showed all of my horse teeth. I expressed my own joy, just as honestly as she did. The strength and the resolve to move on, from the death of our friend.

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And then she punched me straight in the face.

What...?

I didn't understand at first what had happened. I only saw that her hand swung fast and forward, and then suddenly my vision shifted, quickly traveling to the side.

The world spun, I was disoriented. I felt something yank at my fur, my head grabbed and pulled towards Flaze's own.

Our gazes met, and I saw not the kindness I perceived in her eyes prior. Instead, her expression had contorted into one of fury, and of rage. A visage that would not look out of place, on a wrathful demon.

Flaze's mouth opened, just as she was about to speak. I could almost see hot cascading smoke rising from within, and not because of the smell. Although that too.

I decided it would be a terrible idea to speak of it right now.

"Jackal." She spoke. Strict. Stern.

I wanted to shrink away and step back just from that single intonation alone, but her grip on my head remained firm, offering no venue of escape.

"Have you any idea how worried I was!?" She asked.

I blanked out for a second, uncomprehending of what she said. And then she continued, before I could neigh.

"Do you know how much panic I was in when you just suddenly ran off on your own?!"

Right. We're talking about what happened. Yeah, I fucked up.

I wasn't able to get a neigh in.

"At first...!" Flaze was about to continue, but her words got stuck in her throat. She gulped, her position balking, her grip released from my cheeks. I didn't dare move from my place. "I considered if you were really running away and leaving me behind. Used as a decoy. My life forfeit for your own."

I saw her eyes glisten, and she almost began crying again, but she visibly steeled herself. "I know I told you that if you were ever in trouble, to just leave me behind and save yourself. But... I take it back. Don't do that. I... to be betrayed by my best friend, that is despair worse than death!!"

She nearly stumbled, and I quickly clashed my snout against her to support her weight.

I neighed. I'm sorry. That's not what I meant to do at all. And I did not mean to make you feel that way. I'm sorry.

I also wrote my feelings on the ground, with my fireball.

Flaze nodded, wiping away a few tears. "Okay... But I'm not done with you yet, Jackal! Yes, you weren't leaving me behind, which is good. I assumed wrong. BUT! You were reckless, you've been reckless for a while after Darkvoid's death! I let it go. I know you were grieving. I didn't want to make you feel bad about it. But you not only neglected the safe choice of having my Clone trail ahead, you even left enemies to ambush our flank!"

Damn. I really did do that. I was just so desperate back then, to leave this monster-infested hellhole... For the bigger monster-infested hellhole outside. I have no excuse.

"And fine." She continued, "I let you do it. I should've given more push back. But then you ran off on your own in the middle of battle! You don't fucking coordinate! You almost got yourself killed, you ruined and selfishly shifted around our formation!"

"I know you were probably just trying to pave the way for the both of us, but we would've gotten out of that mess far easier if we just retreated back, with me riding you! We didn't have to kill them right then and there!!"

I... Yeah. I made some massive tactical blunders. I tried to scratch at my cheeks awkwardly.

"That's not the end of it, Jackal! Do you know... Do you have any idea how long you've been asleep!? Do you know what the fuck happened after you passed out?! Have you any idea what I've been through while you were off dreaming about horse girls or whatever!?"

I stepped back as she marched forward, laying into me. I didn't even have the will to deny those accusations at the end.

"I had to defeat all those remaining sheepmen by myself, you know!? I had to kill them all while you were just lying there, and I was unsure if you were even still alive! I was so worried and it was so fucking hard to fight like that! Have you any idea how hard it is to fight like that!?"

No. No I don't. No. No. I shook my head rapidly, my heart rate rising as I grew frantic from her words.

"I was so tired, and so injured after. I couldn't get healed, not fast enough. And then I had to carry your ass out somewhere, scout ahead for a room that was relatively well protected. And then you weren't waking up at all so I had to protect us while you were sleeping all prettily! I haven't gotten sleep, you know? Not in n entire day!"

Fuck. I've been asleep for that long!? Rushing as I did really just made things worse in every way possible. We're leaving even later because of my blunder.

I hit a wall behind my back, and I knew, that there was nowhere left to retreat to.

I found a way to shrink further regardless. I curled up like a dog sitting down, shrinking away as Flaze kept shouting at my face.

She sighed, and stepped away a little. "I'm sorry Jackal. I don't mean to berate you. But... you just kept doing things worth berating. I tried to hold back, but I just couldn't. You know?"

I chewed on her words for a few moments, before nodding.

Yeah. I've been a fucking ass lately. I neighed, an honest sentiment, and not one made just to appease her. I'm honestly embarrassed.

I wrote those words, in flames.

"You should be!" She snapped, before catching herself. She coughed into her fist awkwardly. "I don't... I really don't want to be mean to you Jackal. Not in this unfun way. But, you're just not making it easy for me. Your actions endangered not only yourself, but I as well. You could have gotten us killed. We could have seriously died."

She sat down right in front of me, cross-legged. "I need you to stop. I need you to stop doing this. Please. Can you do that? For me, for yourself. Hell, for Darkvoid. Do you think he'd be happy knowing that you died in such an uncool way because of his death?"

I... No. No, I do not think so. I shook my head.

"Exactly!" She shouted. A moment of extended silence followed.

I sighed, and wrote with my fireball.

I'm sorry, Flaze. Truly, I am. I was in a very terrible place, but that's no excuse. You have more reason to be upset than I am, and yet you remain calm, level-headed. You grieved, but you didn't almost get the both of us killed.

I walked someplace else in the room, for I'd already filled that area with writing. Flaze followed quietly behind. I could see that she wanted to say something, but she knew I wasn't finished.

It won't happen again. I'll do better. I promise.

Flaze read through those lines, and slowly nodded. "That's all I ask Jackal. And don't feel too bad. Okay? All is forgiven. I just want you to do better. Like you said."

Yeah... I smiled, and wrote something else down below.

Punch me again if I lapse back into that.

She chuckled. And with far more enthusiasm that I would have liked, she replied.

"I will."

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