Chapter 8: 8

“It’s the fire ant, fire ant! I’ll buy you a drink if you kiss her. Let’s see how redder it gets!”

‘Fire Ant’ was a nickname given by the mean boy who threw a stone at me who was in the pit.

I had to run on my feet every day to avoid rocks flying from all sides. 

I was afraid of being hit, but I couldn’t help but beg. I had to earn money for my dad’s drinks as well as my own food. 

“You’ve been walking around all day, yet you can’t get me a bottle of alcohol! You useless fire ant!”

My dad didn’t care at all if I confessed to being bullied. Even when he was angry, he called me ‘fire ant.’.

I was that kind of kid. A beggar who was so different from a princess. 

“.…” 

I crouched in a circle. 

The guilt against Alan could somehow be diluted. 

He was the man who killed me in the original, and he could kill me in the future. 

But what about the other people who were eagerly waiting for Lily to come back? What about the lark maids? Verney? 

‘Lily?’

A girl who, like so many ant cave children, fell victim to adult greed. 

The innocent child never returned home. Even after she died, she lost her name to an extra. 

“I’m so sorry….” 

The baby’s-breaths fell down while smoothing the ends of Lily’s pajamas. 

I wanted to live. 

It was really just that.

I didn’t want to die because my neck was cut off. 

“If it was just to the extent of being beaten and having broken legs, I would have honestly said that I am not his daughter. But of all things, my opponent has to be the mad duke…”

This must be the reason why I was an extra.

I still wanted to live even after I saw Lily in my dream. Because I didn’t have the courage to tell the truth at the risk of death. 

I pressed down on my heavy eyelids. 

I was still tired even though I closed my eyes for a while. 

“Ah… ah… ah choo!” 

…Why now, of all times, when I was having a serious thought and a sneeze that didn’t fit me at all came out?

Was it because it was cold? Someone knocked on the door.

Knock knock.

As I went down the bed to look at the fire. 

‘Is it Alan?’

I straightened my back and approached the door. 

If I faced Alan, I should pretend to be fine and smile again. But just before I turned the handle by the door, a thought flashed through my mind. 

‘Alan wouldn’t knock and wake Lily up.’

“…Who are you?” 

The answer did not return. It was ominous. 

Knock, knock, knock.

An unidentified guest knocked on the door again. I got goosebumps and whisked my hand right off the handle. 

“I said who are you?”

“….Excuse me, Princess.”

Drunken pronunciation. It was a male voice, but it was never Alan.

“Open the door, please. I have something to tell you, so…”

“How did you get to my room?”

I didn’t know who it was, but Alan couldn’t have let a drunk man approach his daughter, who had just returned after 10 years. 

I wondered if something serious had happened to the duke, but the man behind the door answered as if it was natural. 

“Ah, of course, it was a little difficult to avoid the surveillance. Since the guards have not returned yet, how can I not greet you?”

“What? But still…”

Thud! The man knocked hard on the door, perhaps because he couldn’t stand it anymore. 

I took a step back in surprise. 

“Please open it.”

“…Go away.”

“Don’t you know who I am?”

“Of course I don’t…”

“You don’t know? Hahaha.”

The low-pitched laughter of the man gave me chills. 

“Haven’t you already seen me when you came to the Duke’s castle? Ouch, can’t you recognize my wonderful nose because it’s broken?” 

You broke your nose…?

‘Ah.’

A servant whose face Alan had turned into a mess passed through my mind. 

“There is a guest who has come to see you.”

“…I’ll tell my dad.”

“You can’t do that. The man asked me so earnestly to let him meet the princess alone.” 

I heard the sound of a coin bumping. 

It felt like he had received a lot of bribes along with alcohol in return for bringing him there. 

“He’s an old man. I don’t remember the name well.”

Let’s scream. This was not the time to judge. 

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“It smelled really bad. What do you call it…? A pig porridge smell?”

I took a deep breath and closed my mouth. I stood blankly for a long time and slowly opened the door. 

A pig porridge smell. That terrible stench that I was so used to.

I could guess who the guest was without hearing more. 

***

The servant took me to the kitchen of the abandoned building. 

Alone, I wandered on the cold stone floor waiting for the guest.

Only dim candles illuminated the view. 

Something was strange. 

‘Why didn’t I run into anyone on my way here?’ 

Of course, it would be difficult to have guards all over this wide ducal mansion.

The knights were out fighting, and they were short on surveillance.

‘But I’m Lily.’

At least Alan believed so. 

So how did they get here safely? 

Even if he wouldn’t be satisfied with sleeping next to me.

‘…No, maybe I’m just thinking too complicatedly. The guards were placed around the castle, not in the bedroom.’

I soon gave up pondering because it was a question that I couldn’t think about. 

Yeah, let’s solve the current problem.

“You remember, right? My colleagues were killed while trying to bring you home.”

The voice of the servant with a crushed face rang in my ears. 

“Because of the order of the Duke, I couldn’t even ride a carriage and stumbled around. I just arrived and tried to get through the door, but a madman got in my way. He said he knows the princess well.”

“I was going to send him back at first, but strangely, he knew the characteristics of the princess… ah, right.”

“A cheap necklace with this little black jewel. Hehe, right. He said that you cherish it very much.”

I stopped and looked around the kitchen hallway. A long shadow was approaching me. 

I clasped the necklace in my hands as if it was part of my body. 

A fat man suddenly burst into the kitchen. The ferocious wrinkles seem to have thickened in the meantime, but the fierce aura from the whole body remained the same. 

“…How in the world did you know?”

I said it as clearly as possible. In fact, I was so nervous that I felt nauseous.

“Is that what you’re saying to me, you ungrateful bitch?”

The answer came immediately.  

I swallowed hard to avoid stuttering.  

“How did you know? That I’m the princess who returned…” 

I sighed for a moment, then let out a suffocating word.  

“Dad.” 

The man in front of me was my real father. I was scared, but I couldn’t scream.  

I was rather relieved that the servant brought me here. Because Alan must not find out about my biological father’s existence.  

“You leave your father in the ant cave and live comfortably all alone. Your selfishness resembles your mother.”

Every time my father spoke, there was a strong smell of pig porridge.  

The days of the past, which I had forgotten for a while, flooded over me.  

All the people living in the ant cave were poor, but those living in areas where food waste was thrown could afford to give something to others.  

I used to beg them often for food.  

Every day I went there to fill my stomach, I could smell the awful pig porridge.  

Right, the nasty smell from my father. It was originally the smell of my flesh.  

“Are you still carrying the rubbish your mother left behind? Stupid bitch.” 

My father came up to me and tugged at the strap of my necklace.  

I almost fell for a moment, but I struggled and managed to back off.  

‘I know that I’m stupid.’

This was my mother’s necklace.

As soon as my mother, who was an unqualified fortune teller, gave birth to me, she left the house leaving only the necklace she had made herself.  

My father always worried about me when I carried around things that my mom had left behind. 

He was asking me why I was always carrying stuff from a woman who abandoned me and got another man somewhere.  

He said I was so dull and foolish that my mother left.  

I hated that my father repeated such words, so I grabbed the necklace and prayed every day.  

Mom, please come back. Come back and tell me you didn’t leave me. Even though you’re far away now, please tell me that you love me. 

But the truth is, I knew it before I realized my reincarnation.  

‘Mom has abandoned me.’

My father, who came in front of me who was thinking about it, growled.

“Give me that.”

“…What?”

“Since you’ve become a princess, you’re going to eat as much as I want. If you have something like that, you’ll get caught. So I’ll keep it for you.” 

It made some sense. This was an object from the time of living in an ant cave, a trace of the past. 

When larks bathed me, I even hid it under my bed in case I got caught. 

I slowly took off my necklace. Instead of putting it in his hands, I quickly hid the necklace behind my back. 

“Who told you I’m here?”

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